


On our way to the sky

by KylandaDragan



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alliances, Angst, Betrayal, Developing Relationship, Execution, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Ghost Qui-Gon Jinn, Friendship, Gray Jedi, Hurt/Comfort, Jedi, Jedi Mind Trick, Jedi Rey, Jedi Training, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Space Battles, Starkiller Base, The Dark Side of the Force, The Force, Trust, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-11-21
Packaged: 2019-03-12 19:18:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 53
Words: 136,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13553877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KylandaDragan/pseuds/KylandaDragan
Summary: What happens when everything you have ever believed in is being questioned ?Ben Solo is finally free from Snoke’s hold. But is he really free from all of his demons ?  Will the First Order truly follow him or will it be the occasion for some to try and take control of the whole organization?As Supreme leader Kylo Ren ascends to power, the resistance takes  shelter on Ahch-to, final resting place of the legendary Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. Hoping to rebuild everything from there, the survivors from the battle of Crait grow concerned for Rey, who seems to be struggling with things she refuses to share.With no master guiding her, can Rey become the Jedi knight they all desperately need ?





	1. Where you stand

* * *

 

Chapter 1 : Where you stand

3 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events.

 

It's at night when she feels it next.

The part of her that has been hollow since they have taken off of Crait starts to fill at an alarming rate, with a strange mix of hope and yearning. The other part of her knows how deceptive those feelings are.

She doesn’t turn to face him. She can’t. Instead, she remains in her meditating position, the only sign of her trouble being the tightening of her fingers over her knees.

She hears his breath hitch. He doesn’t expect this either.

« Rey… » His voice is strangled, almost a whisper… her nails digs in her skin.

« What do you want ? » She tries to sound strong, detached, even. It doesn’t work.

He doesn’t answer at first. How can he ? There are so many things he wants and none that she is willing to provide. She made it clear.

« Why are we still doing this ? » Is his voice a bit accusatory ?

She chuckles against her own will. « You tell me. Now that your master is gone, it should have ended.»

« It had nothing to do with him. » He snaps. How dare he, him who backed away from… from…

She stands and turns to face him. Her mouth opens to say something hurtful, but everything remains caught in her throat.

His eyes… there is so much in them. Sorrow, pain, anger… is it a new scar over his face ?

« Ben… » she whispers, almost forgetting all she could have said to hurt him. She is back in the throne room, desperatly hoping he will finally make the right choice.

« It’s just us, don’t you feel it ? It was always us. » His voice almost pleads. « This is the will of the force. »

Keeping their eyes locked is too much to bear. He looks around, but only sees the cold durasteel environment of his quarters.

« What does it want from us ? » That question again. The one that keeps her awake at night. The same that tortures him during the day.

«  An alliance. We are meant to rule together. ». This is the best answer he has been able to find so far. The most convenient. The one where he’ll never be alone again, because she will be by his side.

« Rule over what, Ben ? Over the ashes of any system who will have resisted the First Order ? »

His emotions go on overdrive. He bares his teeth and his eyes darken.  « I wasn’t behind what happened to Hosnian prime if this is what you are refering to.  I never agreed to that ! » he nearly yells, pointing a gloved finger toward her.

« It’s all the same. » she answers sadly and yet almost serenely. « It is still the First Order’s responsability. And they say now that you have ascended to the Supreme Leader ‘s position. »

He lowers his hand, but his eyes remain piercing. « You left me no choice. We could have ended it all. Together. The Sith were done when I ignited the lightsaber to kill  Snoke. Skywalker is dead. »

« And yet the Jedi Order lives on. » She cuts with pride in her eyes.

« You are no more Jedi than I am. » He answers, his voice surprisingly calm.

«  I am a force user », she retorts.

« That does not make you a Jedi. Do you know what Jedis are, Rey ? ». He takes a step forward, then another one, his eyes blazing. His voice grow softer « Do you ? »

Her breath speeds up against her will, her eyes remaining locked with the one who should be her enemy. Again, the words remain caught in her throat as she is trying to pronounce them.

« You need to find out what they really are. Then… » he looks away, then back at her once he is sure he is not going to reach out to try and touch her. « You’ll see where you stand. »

The connection abruptly cuts and the void hits her back with a dizzying force.

* * *

 


	2. A mother’s advice

* * *

 

Chapter 2 : A mother’s advice

A week before, on Ahch-To, 2 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

 

Leia is sitting on Rey’s bed in the hut the young Jedi claimed as hers. The aging General doesn’t really understand why the young woman has selected a space so retired that it takes to climb a hill to get to her. Is she picking up on Luke’ hermit vibes ? Perhaps it is a Jedi trait for those who have been involved in intense force battles with tragic outcomes.

The ascension was harsh on Leia’s legs. She must admit, she hasn’t quite yet recovered from being blasted into space during their escape from D’Qar. She is no longer twenty, full of hope and energy. Now, she feels her age in each and every bone. It is so strange, as months before, she could pretend she was still fine and able to lead yet another rebellion. But since Han left... and then Luke…

« Rey, I urge you to reconsider. We need you here. »

Rey is filling a bag with the very few belongings she has. She has already hidden there the Jedi books she had taken with her once she left the island and Luke after their last confrontation. Leia doesn’t know she has them and she won’t tell. Not to her. Not to anyone.

 « I won’t be long Leia, but I must do this. »

Leia can hear the faint distress under the otherwise calm and controlled tone the young woman is using to talk to her.

« What do you expect to find there ? » she replies with as much compassion as she can convey.

Rey barely shakes her head, her eyes now falling over the two pieces of the Skywalker lightsaber.

« I need to make sure of something. »

She slowly grabs the two pieces and looks at them, being torn between being mesmerized and  crushed. How did this happen ? The lightsaber usually answered to her. She has a brief vision of his eyes in the throne room when he extends his hand. She hears his voice when he whispers « Please ». She shakes her head and stuffs the pieces in her bag before securing it. Her fingers are slightly shaking. She nearly feel the pain he felt, the desperation of going back to being alone, A true mirror of her own situation.

Leia  is now silent. For a brief moment, she felt like an intruder. She has often seen Rey looking at those two pieces of lightsaber. There is a silent communication there. Is it because the Kyber Crystal in it was tuning itself to her own feelings to perfectly match her? She vaguely remembers the tales Luke told her about lightsaber creation.

Then it reaches her mind. This was the skywalker’s lightsaber, built by her own father. Passed to Ben and now given to her. Anakin fell, Ben fell. Would Rey fall too ? Leia feels a stab of worry reach her heart.

« You don’t have to do this alone. We can come with you once our forces are being rebuilt. We are already receiving signs of people joining us. »

« Leia, I can’t wait. I want to go back to Jakku. I need to see for myself.» Rey looks at her. She is determined but the old general knows that there is so much more in her eyes.

« To Jakku ? There is nothing left for you there. »

« There is one last thing. » She almost feels Ben’s presence then a whisper against her ear « You know the truth. Say it. ». She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, trying to push away those memories.

« How long will you be gone ? » Leia is weary. She can see that Rey is going through some kind of experience.

« Just the time i’ll need to let the past die. » is the only thing she can answer.

***

A little later, in the secrecy of her own hut, Leia keeps her eyes shut. She holds in her hands her brother’s lightsaber. This is one of the few  personal belongings the fish nuns gathered after Luke became one with the force and that were given to her upon her arrival.

Alone, so desperately alone.

She lost them all.

The first one was her beautiful raven haired boy who became that stranger she doesn’t understand anymore. At times, she wonders if she could have made things take a different turn. She knows it’s an illusion. She did what was feeling right at the time. She wouldn’t have taken another path. Growing up with the empire and becoming a rebel to make it fall leaves marks. None from her generation truly believed everything was done and over. There was so much work to do to protect a peace seeming so fragile.

Then she lost Luke, who vanished after the Jedi’s Temple destruction. There was no message from him, no explanation. Nothing but the void he left when he cut himself from the force.

Han lingered for a while, but it was too much for him to handle. So he left her too and resumed his wild life on the Falcon’s board. It was easier this way for the both of them. Deep down, she was sure Han had blamed her for Ben. He had many time called « the force » the Skywalker curse, and the curse had led to an epic showdown with as the result, the ascension of Kylo Ren. 

They had shared some good years and some epic arguments. He was her scoundrel and her, his princess and it had felt like they would fight like this until the end, because this is how they loved each other. Precious moments, forever tainted by the loss of what they had created out of passion in a hut on Endor after the second Death Star explosion.

« Where are you now, Han ? » she says with a tired voice.

She remains motionless but something shifts in the hut, and she knows he is here. She opens her eyes and he is in front of her, surrounded by a blue halo. Luke smiles down at her and comes closer, holding his hands together.

« He is well, Leia. He is in that other place and someday, you’ll be reunited with him. We all will.»

She takes a soft breath and gives him a soft and yet sad smile. « Why haven’t we done better when you two were still alive ? »

« It was our journey into this world. The Force needed… »

She raises a hand to stop him, shuts her eyes and shakes her head. « Please. No. Don’t say it. Not tonight. »

He bows his head and looks at the lightsaber in her hands. He had sworn to never touch it again after what he nearly did to Ben. At first, he had been afraid of seeing the Kyber Crystal bleed.  Then he had felt like he no longer deserved the master Jedi title. He had become an old fool, a self righteous man who had nearly destroyed his own nephew, out of fear. Where had his compassion gone, that night ?

« I know she has left. Her mind is in disarray.»

« She is gone to Jakku. I tried keeping her here.» Leia says,regrets filling her voice.

« This is her journey. If you remember, I had mine too. »

Leia smiles despite herself. « Dagobah ? »

Luke answers with a matching smile « Dagobah. »

She missed those gentle talks with her twin brother. She looks at him, her eyes filled with sorrow. « Oh Luke, I am so tired. Why is this struggle neverending ?»

« It will be over. Soon. You have to believe in that. »

« Can you see the outcomes from where you are ? » her voice cracks.

« If I could, I could never give them to you. »

She nods and tries to keep her emotions under control. She repeats in her head the mantra she has always kept carved in her mind. I am a princess and a general. And I can face it all with my chin raised high. « Will you watch over her ? »

He gives her one of those enigmatic smiles. His eyes soften. He wishes he could take her in his arms, hold her, shield her from the universe as a whole. But he is merely a projection from the other side and all he can give her are words of hope and of comfort. Words only a mother would want to hear.

« I will watch over them. » 

He vanishes shortly after to avoid seeing the tears that are already threatening to fall.

 

* * *

 


	3. Kill it if you have to

* * *

 

Chapter 3 : Kill it if you have to.

4 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events.

 

The journey back to her homeworld is a complicated one. She hasn’t forgotten the path leading to it but she is no longer the person she used to be, even if not even a galactic standard year has passed since it all started for her.

She makes Luke’s X-Wing fly over the junkyard where her and Finn have stolen the Falcon but she doesn’t leave it there. Somehow, she finds herself unable to go to that place because this is where the decision that set everything else in motion was made. Had they managed to steal the other ship, Han and Chewie wouldn’t have stopped them , they wouldn’t have been spotted on Takodana, she wouldn’t have met…

No. No, she can’t see things that way.

She makes the x-wing land between two dunes  not far from the old piece of junk she used to call home. Having her bag against her and her old staff, she journeys back to the AT-AT under the crushing heat of the sun. She used to be more careful. Dehydratation was an aweful way to die.

She stops in front of the AT-AT. It is partially covered with sand and looks perfectly undisturbed. Who would have wanted to get there anyway ? She had settled as far away as she could at a very young age to avoid any unpleasant confrontation with the other junktraders and her home had absolutely no value whatsoever.

She hears that voice again and even if it is only her memory replaying  the words, the emptiness in her is replaced by something else. « You come from nothing. You’re nothing.» She hears the honesty in his voice and even if it hurts, she can’t deny that he is telling the truth.

« You are right Ben. I come from nothing. » She whispers under her breath.

She feels the usual pull and slightly turn her head toward the left where she knows he is appearing. Her eyes locks with his. He is  sweating, panting and holding his lightsaber. He turns it off and rubs his hair back in a gesture making him look more human.

« You called.» he states in a rather calm way.

« This is not how it works. » she looks back at the AT-AT. « I was thinking about something you said.»

He observes her behavior and looks in front of her, even if all he can see is the training room he is in. Then his mind clicks and he knows. « You went back to the desert. »

She briefly shut her eyes, knowing full well that he could use this knowledge against her. Somehow, she knows he won’t. «I needed to see. »

He takes a step closer, his lightsaber still in his hand.

« Don’t ». She says, her eyes hardening on the AT-AT. He freezes.

« It used to be my world. I wasn’t questioning it. I was waiting and I was sure that someday it would all end because someone, somewhere would remember me and would come to take me away. It never happened. »

He puts the lightsaber on his belt. «All the children wish for their nightmare to end, Rey.»  Her hands are slowly tightening in fists. Her breath is a bit ragged. That he can tell from the erratic moves of her shoulders. His eyes stay locked over her head and he knows, even from there that she is crying. A part of him breaks as she falls apart.

« My nightmares will never end, Ben. In the end, I am always left behind. »

«  I wouldn’t leave you behind. Together we could… »

« We could what ? » she barks, watching him with a fierce look. He now has the survivor in front of him. The one from the forest, watching him with burning eyes. « Rule the galaxy ? Bend it to your will ? Kill everyone coming in our way ? Burn everything not being what you want ? »

His own eyes harden. « Do you want this war to end ? »

She narrows her eyes at him.

« Say it. What do you want, Rey ? »

« I want you to stop chasing the resistance ! »

« This is not what you truly want. » He states with a very calm voice. « If you were really concerned for the resistance, you wouldn’t be away from them. I know you came here alone. What do you want, Rey ? »

She is now a mix of many things. She is upset because he questions her motivations, She is mad because somehow, he isn’t wrong. She boils because she knows what she wants and she seethes because she can’t find the way to say it, especially to him.

« Why are you doing this to me ? ». She finds herself unable to manage any longer the whirlwind of emotions invading her mind, just because she is here and just because he is with her.

« You need to let go if you want to become what you are meant to be. I am showing you the way. Nothing more. ».

« Then don’t ! Leave ! Leave me ! » She feels like she is suffocating, tears rolling uncontrollably over her cheeks.

The connection abruptly cuts, leaving a cold emptiness in its wake and Rey collapses on her knees from the force of it.  How can she want him to leave when at the same time, she feels this violent urge of being around him ?

***

He snarls from the moment he feels the bond being cut. He ignites his lightsaber and proceeds to slice everything coming in his way.

She is stubborn, and yet if she wants to stop the ache, there is only one solution !

Why is she still holding on to those fake beliefs ? Why does she believe in the resistance, when it’s leader is the very person he knows to be a quitter ? Why can’t she see that this is just them and that this is what the force is trying to tell them ? No one can understand them. No one can save them !

His darkness rejoice at the smell of burnt furnitures and damaged durasteel. But it is only for a fleeting moment, and when he turns off the lightsaber, all he sees before him is destruction.

It used to be enough.

 It isn’t anymore.

Jakku. He has to go to Jakku.

* * *

 


	4. The conflict of being Supreme leader

* * *

 

Chapter 4 : the conflict of being Supreme leader.

4 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events.

 

 

There used to be a time where Kylo Ren could simply ask the staff to oversee preparation of his ship and just leave with or without the knights of Ren by his side for lenghty mission when it was needed.

Snoke had no apparent troubles leading the whole First Order. He was commanding with an iron fist, and Kylo and Hux were doing the deeds. In the predicament he is now, the new supreme leader knows that things won’t go this way for him. Why ? Because Hux will never be subdued as he was with the previous Master.

Kylo knows that the red haired snivelling womprat is waiting for him to make a wrong move. He knows Hux is patiently binding his time, waiting for a weakness, or an opportunity to overthrow him.

However, he’ll be damned if he lets this unsufferable maniac in charge. just the perpective of seeing a delighted Hux seems revolting. If anything, he’ll make sure he’ll keep harrassing the little bastard just for the pleasure of seeing him mad with anger.

He knows he should think about appointing someone else as general, especially after the incredible fiasco following D’Qar and Crait’s events. He has heard whispers among their ranks, whispers saying that Hux makes reckless decisions that are below what should be expected from a strategist. In some of the oldest units, it is even hinted that Hux is far from being his father and that perhaps, someone should take matter in his own hands and do a favor to the First Order by eliminating this inside threat.

This would be the best option. But this one means having to remain close to the lead until he is sure his orders are correctly followed. He wouldn’t go as far as talking about trust. He knows better than this. Once in the snake nest, one must live by the snake’s rules. It is more along the line of grooming the next general to make him understand the price of any lapse of loyalty and this would take time.

 If anything, Hux already know what Ren is capable of and even if he is waiting for his time, he is for now not in position to make a move. Having lost so many important ships damaged their fleet, and  one cannot make a coup when the forces aren’t 100% ready, organized and unanimously devoted to their general.

But this inability to react doesn’t mean Hux can’t undermine his leadership and because of that, Kylo has to be remain extremely careful. He deployed his knights in all the sensible departments, and gathers their intell himself. This comes with a price : the loss of the majority of his time.

And yet… yet… he knows there is something he must do. He knows it has to remain a secret, for Rey could easily become some leverage in his silent war between Hux and him. But he needs to go where she is, because even without the communication open between them, he can feel faintly through the force something that he can’t allow. Something that he loathe… he feels her distress and he knows, in this moment, he can’t leave her alone.

***

He takes the opportunity of one of Hux’ programmed trips to the outer rim where their fleet is currently in maintainance and he gives him several tasks to accomplish, to hold him back for a standard week. All he had to do was to secure a flight plan on his own for him and his knights of Ren, then find a way to redirect the mission of his men once near Jakku in order to be left to do what he has to do.

It would take Kylo two standard day to reach Jakku, one day to meet Rey, and two days to come back. He would have to be efficient in finding her, but somehow was confident that the force would guide him to her.

***

He feels her from the moment he enters athmosphere but the connection is so strong that it is impossible to define a location. If he uses his logic, then she has to be around where she had lived for all those years and this is how he decides to head to Nimaa outpost.

He isn’t a fool. He knows he needs to be as invisible as possible, which is a challenge for someone with his height and his confidence. He knows he has to make up for it and this is why, for the first time in a long time, he sheds his black attire to wears something lighter, in layers of grey, covered by a sand colored cape. He knows he can’t be recognized, as people there know only the mask. Yet, he decides to tie his hair, a feature he knows to be distinctive over him.

With his lightsaber safely secured to his belt, he steps out of the ship, and is immediately blinded by the incredible power of  the sun. Living in a dark environment most of the time doesn’t make it easy.

He decides not to ask for any information regarding a female scavenger which would have disappeared for months before coming back here. Instead, he lets his instinct guide him and he starts walking while meditating over the glimpses of her life he has from their previous connections.

***

She feels him from the moment he enters athmosphere and it’s a mix of everything. A whirlwind of sensations assaulting her all at once. She gets out of the AT-AT and looks up at the sky, certain to see a whole fleet get here to find her and take her to him.

No, the minutes pass and nothing comes in view. The sun is extremely warm, as it is the middle of the afternoon, but nothing  can make her move from that elevated spot. He is here, somewhere and she wishes she could locate him but she can’t. Everything is too strong. It is as if he is all over her, wrapped around her and filling her completely at the same time.

It becomes nearly dizzying and she feels her breathing picking up. She should be careful with the dehydratation. No, she doesn’t care. Not when she feels him near. She takes a soft breath and tries something, almost out of pure instinct.

« Ben. »

He freezes as she appears in front of him. His breath is catching. She is radiant under the sun.

« Rey. »

She looks at him and sees that he is not in his usual uniform. Faintly, she wonders why and he answers without her having to voice anything.

« No one can know that I am here. I needed to come to you. Tell me where you are. »

He came for her. In a moment that he knows to be difficult for her. He came. Him. Ben. Not Supreme Leader Kylo Ren but the man she is connecting with since the beginning. She closes her eyes and projects her location with a sequences of images going  from Niima to her AT-AT. She knows that the path  will be easy to follow, given the number of recognizable shipwrecks on the way.

« Come to me. »

This is when she feels it, when the realization comes. She welcomes it with serenity despite what it may mean along the way.

She knows from this moment that a part of her will forever be unable to let go of that man.

* * *

 


	5. My best enemy

Chapter 5 : My best enemy

 4 galactic standard weeks and two days after Crait’s events.

 

 

It doesn’t take Ben long to join Rey, despite the heat. Yet, his face shows the signs of his time under the deadly rays of the sun. He is at the top of a sand hill when he first sees her, on the roof of her fallen AT-AT and for a moment, he stops to get a good look at the whole scenery.

 A remnant of the defeated Empire, a machine of death has been for years the only shelter for a lonely child forgotten by everyone. Here, lost in the deadly desert, in the middle of nowhere.  He has lived in the most comfortable palaces, he never wanted for anything and yet, a part of him can relate to this desolate scenario because like her, he has felt starved from that essential sense of belonging any creature in the galaxy is searching for.

It could have been him in that AT-AT, and her in the palaces… they would have felt the same kind of despair.

***

He is up there, on the sand hill. She turns to fully face him, as the desert wind makes her hair fly in soft waves. It is like she is seeing him for the first time. There will be no battle, no duel, no bargain. Just them as they were that night in the hut before Luke cut their connection.

Should she wave at him ? Smile perhaps ? She is just caught here in the moment and the simple visual connection between them is enough to make her fall into a whilrwind of renewed sensations. The biggest one is the longing to be close to him and it scares her because she knows that nothing is changed and that they are still on the oposite sides of the war.

Yet, he takes a step forward, then another, and her heartbeat picks up in anticipation as he crosses the space between them.

***

He is halfway there when she jumps from the roof of her AT-AT and for a moment, he is afraid she is going to lock herself away. No he shouldn’t think that. She asked him to come to her. Rey is not a deceiver. She hasn’t had the time to be tainted by…

No ! He will not think of this man now ! Skywalker and his lies are gone just as Snoke and his schemes are, for the most part. One step closer to end it all. One step toward freedom.

She emerges from behind her AT-AT, walks toward him and he has to refrain himself from running to her. Since he landed on the planet, he has the feeling he is falling into her, as if he is no longer the master of his own body.

Yet, once they are close enough, they stop at arm length, both being afraid of making the ultimate connection.

Their eyes lock and no word is spoken. For a moment, they are lost in the dizzying sensation of their soul crashing together and merging to become one.

His face, his eyes especially, soften from the blank mask he wears for the first order. Hers becomes again a mix of purity, innocence and serenity and he drowns into that light like a parched man.

« You shouldn’t be here.  You are easy to find.»

« I am not afraid of being found. I needed to come back here. »

His lips slightly purse in disaprobation.

« The whole first order is after you… for Snoke. »

 She keeps her eyes over his features and understands. The blame had to fall on someone, and he had to survive. Should she despise him for this ? Maybe. Then again, telling the truth would have put him in an incredible amount of danger. A thing she is unable to accept any longer.

« The whole resistance is after you… for the fleet. »

His face reverts to its blank state. He looks around at the desert and slightly shakes his head.

« This had to be expected. »

« You can’t blame them. » She says, her face closing a little and some of the fire returning in her eyes.

« Can’t I ? » he answers with a slightly cutting voice, his gaze once again sinking deep over her. « I can blame them for many things. Things I don’t expect you to suspect or know. »

For a fleeting moment, they are back on Starkiller Base with their lightsaber connected and she feels ready to duel with him until the end.

« Oh, you are loyal to them. » he nearly purrs, taking a step closer and forcing her to tilt her  head up to keep their eyes locked.  « So loyal, even when you feel where you truly belong. ».

She tries to force herself to deny it. She needs to find the words, but it is like she is a music instrument and he is playing her with the finest tune.

« You know where you will stand. You saw it, as I saw it. »

« What I saw… » she started with a tone has broken as the one she had used in the throne room to plead for him to remain on her side. « What I saw can’t happen, Ben. You know why. »

It feels like a challenge, A gamble. Something his father would have adored. The ghost of Han solo’s roguish smile appearson Ben’s lips.

It would be so easy to give in, to let herself fall into him. But she knows this can’t be the way. Not unless she decides to lose herself. She takes a step back and looks toward the entrance of her former home.

« Lets get inside. » She says a little more casually.  « Your skin is burning. »

She finally turns and gets in the AT-AT, hiding the fact that her hands are shaking.

* * *

 


	6. A day, and then what?

* * *

 

Part 6 : A day, and then what?

 4 galactic standard weeks and two days after Crait’s events. 

 

 

Ben steps after her into the AT-AT, and the first thing that hits him is how packed the space is.  There is barely any room to move for a single person, so with them being two and with him being exceptionally tall, the feeling of suffocating is even more vivid.

Rey moves to the right corner and climbs over the hammack she has created for herself as a child. She absently rubs her fingers over the woven fabric.

« Bunks are definitely more comfortable. » she says, almost to herself.

Ben stands in the middle of the small area free of makeshift furniture and barely nods as he looks around. He hears himself again on Starkiller : « At night, desperate to sleep ». Of course she had been desperate. How could you not be desperate, being a child lost in a desert at night, surrounded by this chaotic mess being at the same time your only mean of survival.

She must have picked something from his attitude, because she slightly shrugs before saying « You said to let the past die. That part has, at least.»

He turns his face to look at her and it is like a blade stabbing him in the chest when he meets her eyes and realizes that they are filled with unshed tears. His face slightly softens, and he shares the burden once again through their bond.

« The past dies. Feelings sometimes linger. »

« I know something powerful lingering in you. » she says in a steady voice. There is no accusation, nor any kind of pity seeping through her words. Just a fact, stated in a few clears words.

He turns to the left and takes a step forward toward a device looking ready to crumble. « A flight simulator ? » He asks in a neutral voice.

He is clearly not ready to face some of the thing he lived. She can’t blame him. Not so long ago, she used to be like him. She changed. He made her change.

« Will you come with me ? » She asks tentatively.

He turns his head and catches her eyes on him once again.

« To the pauper’s grave. Will you come with me ? »

It’s like she is a child again and for a fleeting moment he wonders why his almighty and so perfect Jedi uncle didn’t feel that lost little girl screaming through the force back in the temple days.

« I have a standard day here. We will go where you want to go. »

« A day ? » Her face falls. « And then what ? »

«  Then I go back to the First Order. »

She suddenly feels tired. She rubs a hand over her face and shakes her head before regaining her control. This is a sore topic. This is what separated them the last time and she doesn’t want to go back to that. Not now. Not when he crossed the galaxy to come to her.

She nods and jumps from her Hammack before going to a corner to grabs her staff. He looks at her, slightly curious as to why she is not armed with his, no… hers… their lightsaber.

He must have projected his thoughts hard enough. Her eyes turns to a small table  covered with metallic parts, tools and the broken weapon. He follows her gaze and looks shocked.

« How is that… » 

« Possible ? » she finishes, getting close to the parts. She takes them and stands in front of him, presenting him the two pieces, palms up.

« I think it refused to choose between us. » she adds, her voice surprisingly soft.

On instinct, he puts his hands above hers over the severed metal pieces. His eyes slowly details her face and even thought they aren’t touching, he feels like some electric current running between them. « I think it’s the kyber crystal. It must have cracked. »

She feels exactly what he feels and she knows she is entering some very dangerous territory, but there is no place for rationality in that moment. 

« Then that means it can’t be fixed. » she says, her voice barely audible.

His lips twitch and he holds her gaze with an intensity that grounds her in place.

« I can teach you to fix it. We might have to tamper with the shape of it now that the energy won’t be channeled evenly through the crystal… »

She doesn’t listen to his words, but she hears his voice and it’s enough to send her in a dazed state where he is all she sees, feels… needs ?

« Perhaps with a shape like mine, or if the crack happened diagonally… as a double sided staff… »

« It wasn’t Snoke. You were right. »  she whispers , only now realizing that their breathing is synchronized.

« No it wasn’t. » he answers, his eyes back over his hands.

« Ben, then why… »

« Don’t. » He cuts, knowing already what she is going to ask for.

They have a day, this time. A day, then what ? He takes a step back, feeling the yearning of being close to her build up by the second. He lowers his hands and looks down at her, being a master at restraining himself.

She is not as gifted and pain is written over her face. He can’t helps it, the ghost of a smile appears again on his lips then vanishes as fast as it came.

« I may become your teacher, after all. » He says before taking a step back then exiting the AT-AT.

She needs to regain her composure and he needs to school his features once more.  Above everything he needs to avoid touching her for if he does, he might never find the strength to leave her again.

* * *

 


	7. The graveyard

* * *

 

Part 7 : The graveyard

 4 galactic standard weeks and two days after Crait’s events. 

 

 

It takes them 3 hours to locate the pauper’s grave where her parents have been buried.

Buried… more like thrown in a pit with dozens of other bodies in various stages of decay. The sun was not friendly on Jakku... Not with the living and even less with the dead.

Rey knew the laws from the outpost. There was little time to dwell over the departed. Survival was the only concern for the unfortunate souls living on the surface of that planetary wasteland.

She stands there in front of that makeshift small hill in an otherwise flat part of the ground right behind what they call Junkyard Bay. It is unmarked and it is virtually impossible to know how many are buried or even if her parents are in there.

Except,  she knows.  Because of Unkar Plutt and one thing he said to her when she was 11. That part she had pushed deep inside her mind, hoping to bury it. But Ben has found it. It was a simple set of sentences, carrying all the cruelty Plutt was able to convey when he wanted to ascertain something.

« You need to work harder, girl. I will not be easy on you forever. Now that the useless meats that birthed you are feeding the sandworms at Junkyard bay, you’ll be the one to pay me back. »

Her eyes are nearly empty over that hill. She doesn’t cry and that surprises her.

He stands next to her, wrapped in that sand colored cape. He looks at the hill but it’s her that he sees, out of the corner of his eye. She is seething, much like she was when the praetorians attacked. He remembers hearing her scream at one of them before making a mess out of him. She was never stronger than when she was upset, and that was a dark side trait, one he knew very well.

Something is fuelling her right now, and the dark part of their bond sings as it grows. Kylo slightly flexes his fingers to try to stay in control. He knows she is far from rational right now, and darkness without rationality leads to madness.

« Explain to me. » she says through gritted teeth. « Explain to me how you can abandon a 6 years old girl in the middle of the desert, to a filthy junk boss that aimes to starve and enslave people. »

He looks straight in front of him and remains silent for a while.

« I can’t. »

She lets out and eerie laugh, and lowers her head. « You were right. I come from nothing. I am nothing. »

« Not to me. » The words flow out of his mouth as naturally as his body breathes.

« That doesn’t change anything Ben.»

He turns his head just in time to meet her eyes and in them, he sees a fierce determination fuelled by the anger of being at a closure point.

« I will not join the First order. I will not rule the galaxy by your side because this is not the way things should be done. I am a member of the resistance… »

« Rey… »

« Let me finish ! » She shouts, and here they are again… the eyes from the forest. His breath is catching in his throat and she is too magnificent to be stopped.

« I am a member of the resistance and the resistance is my family, now. They have been more loyal to me to me than my own parents ! I owe them to be equally as loyal ! »

« Then you know why I can’t let go of the first order, Rey. » his answer is sharp and straight to the point.

« The First Order aimes to destroy the whole galaxy. »

« No. Not the way I am building it. It has to stop, Rey, you don’t know politics as I do ! It corrupts and destroys ! Those senators, those chancellors are after only one thing ! Their own power. I want to end it all. No more politics. No more senate. One central power making the rules and no one trying to rule to gain personal benefits instead of organizing the future of the galaxy. »

« Leia is not like that ! »

« Leia is exactly that ! » he nearly yells in her face, his breathing suddenly coming out ragged.  « You don’t know her. She may look like a very nice and tired old lady these days, but I know who she is, and what she is capable of doing for her so noble mission of saving the galaxy ! »

« What are you talking about ? » She yells back, his anger feeding her and hers feeding him.

« Your parents gave you up for drinking money ! Mine gave me up because of her so noble cause ! I may not have starved on that force forsaken planet, but I starved from everything else, moving from palace to palace and being tended to by droids ! »

Her hands drop and her face contorts to show pain. But it’s not hers she feels. It’s his.

« Ben… » She whispers, being at loss for words.

« First it was the droids and her duty being too important ! Then it was his trips across the universe with Chewwie and his concern each time I was having difficulties controlling my force abilities ! Then they shipped me to my uncle because it was more convenient, and what did he do ? He tried to end me because I wasn’t like them ! » He is nearly panting, now, and it takes him a huge amount of control to not run to the outpost and destroy something with his lightsaber.

« They never told me the truth about my family ! I found out in the newsfeed ! from a filthy politician who had no problem exposing my family for his own personal gain ! All my life ! All my life I felt different ! All my life I saw the fear in my father’s eyes and I felt the concern of my mother. But there was a rational explanation to all that ! And I found out from a power greedy stranger ! »

He takes a step back and realizes only now all he has said.

« I will end all that. » He looks at her with a strange longing. The same he had back in the throne room when he offered his hand. She knows what he wants. He doesn’t need to say it.

She shakes her head, sadness filling her eyes.

« Not like that. »

* * *

 


	8. There is no sweetness in sorrow, so why do we part?

* * *

 

Part 8 : there is no sweetness in sorrow, so why do we part?

4 galactic standard weeks and three days after Crait’s events. 

 

 

It has been difficult to be around her after this revealing moment. He has said too much, he is very well aware of that : It was enough to make her want to step back but not enough for him to feel relieved of the burden that has weighted on his shoulders for the past decade.

They don’t sleep that night. Neither of them can in the enclosed space of the AT-AT. Communicating is hard, knowing that they still stand on opposite sides of the barrier. What more is there to say, when they are both resolute in their position?  They settle in a comfortable silence, in a nearly meditative state, but being fully aware of the presence of their kindred spirit being at arm length.

They have yet to touch, even if a part of them longs for it. Instead, Ben keeps his eyes focused over Rey’s form. In another time, in another reality, she would have been the one. He would have made her princess of Alderaan and he would have given her everything. He would have erased her past and her pain. He would have been her universe.

He offered something like this, with the only cards he has in hands but she refused. He is who he is and he will never revert back to the young man he once was. Too much has been said, done… lost.

Rejection is for him the ultimate poison and with each beating of his heart, the dizzying feeling of loneliness spreads. In less than a few standard hours, he will be travelling back to the First Order. She will go back to her precious resistance and for now, he doesn’t know how to do it without killing himself in the process.

***

She tries not to look at him even if she feels his eyes on her. If she does, she is going to fall toward him and all will be lost. She uses all her strength to keep herself steady but she is longing to know what it would feel like to connect for real and not through the virtuality of their force bond.

She looks at her right hand, the one that connected in the hut that night, and she digs in her memories to remember the feeling of his skin materializing against hers.

She tries to remember the million of reasons to avoid this man, but being in the same space as him makes this quest vain. He is all around her, hovering over her. She feels him outside and inside as if he was a pool and she had been drowning in it. When it is just the two of them, he isn’t the Supreme Leader of her enemies. 

He is Ben. Just Ben.

***

When the time comes to part, it is almost awkward. How can they say goodbye when the force bond between them is fighting against it?

They are facing each other, their gazes locked, and for an outsider point of view, his eyes carry a very deep longing while hers are at the same time sad and adoring.

She has left him once, on the floor of that throne room and she remembers it vividly. She had made sure he was fine, first. She had brought him his lightsaber so that he could protect himself against any opponent should more forces raid the room,  and she had tentatively brushed away a lock of hair from his forehead.

He sees that small gesture in her mind and slightly lowers his eyes. In another time, in another reality…

He takes a step back before he can do something stupid, and with the same look he had before she locked the falcon door in front of him on Crait, he tells her:

“Goodbye, Rey.”

She meets his eyes and her voice crack as she answers:

“Goodbye, Ben.”

He slightly look away and nods, then he turns and heads back to Niima Outpost to retrieve his ship.

***

She waits until he is completely gone from her sight, then allows her tears to fall under the sunlight.

 When she is finally able to remove her gaze from the very last spot where she could see him, she returns inside of the AT-AT.

His sand colored cape is folded over the Hammack.

* * *

 


	9. A strong sense of duty

* * *

 

Part 9 : A strong sense of duty

5 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events.

 

 

It is the fourth day after his return from Jakku that Supreme Leader Kylo Ren gives audience to General Hux, in the throne room of Snoke’s palace. The only satisfaction he gains from this confrontation is to watch the ginger haired man at the bottom of the dais giving a full report on the latest developments regarding the army while he remains on the high throne. He knows it triggers Hux’ anger.

« And of course, there is also the matter of replacing the Supremacy, as it has been clearly stated by the engineering team that the remains are beyond repairing. »

« There is no need to replace the Supremacy. » the answer is short and cutting, and Hux momentarily looks taken aback. But he quickly recovers from his lapse in control.

« Supreme Leader, the Supremacy was our biggest and most impressive ship. Without a way to display our superiority… »

« Superiority doesn’t need to be displayed through supersized military tools, General. Superiority needs to be known and understood through acts. »

A crimson color appears over the General’s face, and the usual hatred he feels for Kylo Ren seeps through his whole feature.

« And how do you want to enforce your acts without the appropriate weapons, my lord ? »

He voices the last two words with enough disdain and suddenly feels force choked, even thought Kylo didn’t make a single gesture.

« You will be well advised to avoid questioning my words. »

With his two hands around his neck and gasping for hair, Hux falls to his knees. Kylo looks at him with nearly empty eyes then releases him, before turning his gaze toward one of his knights.

The masked knight bows his head and gets behind Hux, pulling him up before stepping back.

« The First Order has enough ships and forces to fulfill its mission. Should I remind you of our priority, General, or do you remember my command ? »

Hux is still slightly gasping for air, the crimson color not leaving his face. « Locate potential resistance allies and make sure no planetary system within our grasp is turning against us. »

« This is what you will do. The rest is none of your concern. »

« But, the resistance…» Hux says, unable to stop himself.

Kylo Ren rises from his throne and the combination of his narrowed eyes and of his blank face makes him look even more threatening.

« Is my concern and my concern alone. Now, leave and do your duty. I want a report quadran by quadran as our forces are progressing. I expect the first one within three standard days. »

Hux stiffly bows his head and leaves the throne room in haste.

***

Rey lands Luke’s  x-wing on the small flat piece of land remaining free next to the Millenium Falcon. As she opens the cockpit and proceeds to climb out, she spots Finn running down the hill to greet her.

Her feet touch the ground and for a moment, she shuts her eyes and dives into her own mind to find the strength to be as her friends need her to be.

« Rey ! »

Finn is going faster and Rey turn to look at him. She gives him a graceful smile just as he throws himself in her arms and nearly crushes her against him.

« You’re back. » he says, his eyes shut tight.

She returns his embrace and shuts her eyes as well. This is the man who came to find her on Starkiller and she values even more his act, now that she knows how her own parents gave her up.

In the back of her mind, she thinks of another man, who came to her because there are things one should never face alone. She thinks about the sand cape safely hidden in the cockpit along with the jedi books and she feels that tightening in the chest that becomes familiar since it happens each time she thinks of him.

Rey pulls back and keeps her smile up even if inside, she is slowly spiraling toward that horrible hollow feeling she associates with Ben’s absence. Maker, this force bond can be extremely painful to deal with.

« How is Leia ?» she says before Finn can be too perceptive.

He returns her smile and nods « She’s getting better. She is one tough lady. »

« And Rose ? »

Finn’s face slightly change. « It’s still a work in progress. Without any medical droid, it takes time. »

« I’m sure she’ll be fine. You are taking good care of her. »

« I was just a stormtrooper. I don’t really know what I am doing. » he says in an almost apologetic way.

Rey puts a hand over his arm. « Sometimes, we don’t need an expert, Finn. Sometimes, we simply need a friend in order to get better. »

He is grateful for her words, she can tell. But he doesn’t add more on the topic.

« Come on, let’s go up that hill. The others will be thrilled to see you. »

«  Let me grab my bag and I’ll be right there. »

***

Being in the Supreme Leader’s quarter is almost alien to Ben. He never expected to be in charge of everything. Unlike Hux, he never wanted… no… craved for it.

If anything, his current situation is more of an inconvenience. He would need privacy and time to do what he wishes to do, two things he can’t really have since he is being constantly observed, guarded and also spied on. This is why he has the Knight of Ren guard his quarters. This is also why he only feeds on packed military rations.

He knows a lot of men are loyal to Hux and not to him, and he is no fool. He also knows the General is waiting for the perfect opportunity to make a coup. However, he can’t leave the First Order between the hands of that genocidal maniac. He has seen Hosnian Prime, he has felt the thousands of souls screaming in agony all at once.

If Hux was in charge, the galaxy would never stop bleeding.

If he is honest with himself, Ben knows that all this suffering has nothing to do with what truly needs to be done.

What truly needs to be done … What he truly wants to be done… his focus slips, once more and all he can think about is her.

***

Reuniting with everyone is a strange experience. She is pulled into hugs, Chewbacca’s being the warmest for obvious reasons. Poe addresses her one of his infamous winks and BB-8 rolls around her, erupting with a series of noises.

Many ask her questions about what she could have heard while she was away. Has anything happened to Cantonica after Finn and Rose raided Canto Bight?  Is there a rebellion uprising on Corellia ? Words say that something important will come from Dantooine soon…

Leia, as always, is more perceptive than the others. « Lets let the young lady breathe », she says in that motherly voice, and as everyone seem to go quiet. Rey vaguely wonders if she isn’t witnessing a case of collective Jedi mind trick like what she has read in the Jedi book she is currently studying.

« Lets go for a walk. » says the former princess while grabbing Rey’s arm and leading her away.

« They are a bit excited about your return. » She says on a confidential tone. « having a true jedi among them gives them hope. »

« You are more Jedi than I am. » answers Rey in a quiet tone. « Luke barely had the time to train me. »

« And he never truly trained me. » A sad smile form on Leia’s lips. « I never took the time. And I never wanted it. I always considered Luke to be the strongest given what he had to face. He could keep the darkness at bay. I am not sure I could have been able to resist to the temptation as much as he did. »

Rey isn’t sure of what she should think of this confession. Luke keeping the darkness at bay ? Wasn’t the darkness there when he lighted his lightsaber to end his nephew ?

She briefly shuts her eyes. Leia doesn’t know what happened to her son. No one ever told her. No one ever told Han.

« Anyway.» says the aging lady while patting a hand over Rey’s arm. « Was your trip fruitful ? »

Rey looks at her and there is so much sadness in her eyes that Leia stop walking and squeezes her arm a little.

« Do you want to talk about it ? »

If Leia knew she had spent a whole day with her son… If she could hear that Ben is still here somewhere and that she is connected to him in a way that feels more than sacred… Are there words to express what she feels when she thinks of him or to explain all she knows about him ?

« It’s just closure about my past. I went back to Jakku for the last time. There is nothing left for me, there.»

Rey slightly lowers her eyes. Strangely enough, she is at peace with what she just said. She is starting to see why. There is nothing left for her anywhere… As long as he isn’t with her.

***

Later that night, she is sitting on the bunk in her hut and she is watching the stars through the small opening in front of her. She has wrapped herself in the sand colored cape and she lets her mind settle down after a full day of pretending she was fine. The resistance is her family. She told Ben that and she believes in it. Then why… why does she feel so different ? So out of tune with everything ?

« That’s because we don’t fit anywhere but with each other. » Ben is sitting on the floor in the Supreme Leader chamber, one arm casually resting over a bended knee, and his other leg being extended. His head is turned so that he can watch the stars through the duraglass bay.

She turns her head and spots him and he does the exact same thing at the same time. Two pieces of a same soul.

« Does it ever stop ? » she nearly whispers.

« Do you want it to stop ? » he answers quietly.

She shakes her head and rests it against the wall. « No. »

« Me neither.» He drinks in the sight of her. She looks vulnerable and lost like during the last night in the AT-AT. She, who can be so fierce and strong in battle.

« I’m scared, Ben. » she admits, and she knows she does it because he is at the opposite end of the galaxy.

« Why ? » his eyes are now focused over her slightly quivering lips then over the fingers holding the cape a bit tighter around her.

« If we remain on opposite sides of the war… » She hides her face a little against the cape and he feels compelled to ease her worry.

« It doesn’t have to be that way. Rey… we could accomplish so much together. » He tries not to sound pleading, but he fails.

« What can we accomplish if you remain on that path ? » There is no bitterness in her tone. Only resignation.

« and what can we accomplish if we remain apart ? Look at us. It’s there. It lives in us.»

«   I know it does. » Her eyes don’t leave him and she sees the marks of a harsh day over his features. « You never told me what you saw in your vision.»

He slightly shakes his head. « No. »

« Will you, someday ? »

« Will I have to, if I make it happen ? »

There is a kind of certainty in his words. They are at war, their life is more often than not on the line, and yet, he doesn’t hold a single doubt about their future. As she sees the promise of better tomorrows in his eyes, peace gradually settles within her mind.

* * *

 


	10. The Jedi they expect

* * *

 

Part 10 : The Jedi they expect

7 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events.

 

 

« I am concerned about her. She barely joins us to feed anymore. » Finn throws a stick in the bonfire they resistance group has built a little away from the huts. He has waited for most of his comrades to go to bed to voice his concern in front of Leia, Chewwie, Poe, a still recovering Rose, BB-8, C3P0 and R2D2.

« She is perhaps not used to having so many people around her. » answers Rose tentatively.

« That’s not like her. I remember when I met her, she wasn’t like that. »

« What was she like ? » asks Poe as he is leaning back and chewing over a stick.

Chewbacca emits a few grunts then a long howl as he looks into the fire and Leia nods.

« Yes, I think she was very affected by his death. She apparently easily connected with him. » says the former princess, her voice full of regrets.

« With who ? » asks Rose when the silence becomes too heavy.

« Han. » answers Leia, a sad smile forming over her lips. « He had that way with people. He was unsufferable, but we couldn’t help but loving him for it. ». Her eyes fill with tears and like on Crait when Luke appeared for her, she no longer looks like a strong general, but more like a fragile elderly woman who has lost it all.

Chewbacca lets out another long and low howl, then wraps one of his massive hairy arm around her before turning completely silent.

« I don’t think it’s just about Han », says Finn . « What do we know about what she has seen here ? What do we know about what happened on the Supremacy ? »

« She never shared that with you ? » asks Rose, and Finn looks at his companion before shaking his head.

« I don’t think she shared this with anyone. »

BB-8 emits a few bips, then his head slides over his body, which makes Poe slightly chuckle.

« That works only for droids, buddy. You can’t force datas out of a human’s mind, except if you are a Jedi, and then… »

« Is she trained ? Has luke… you know… ? » Rose can’t hide the slight light of excitement at the idea of being around an actual jedi, yet, she can tell now is not the time to get hyper about that.

« Probably. She made some rocks levitate to free us on Crait. I don’t think she was able to do that, before coming here. » Answers Finn, and Rose can’t help but giving him a smile. He smiles back then looks back into the fire.

« We are going to need her soon. » states Poe as he looks at Leia. « You know that the Correllian traders won’t treat with us unless we prove them we have a Jedi with us. »

« They are expecting Luke. » Whispers Leia, defeated.

« And we can maintain the illusion, with Rey. » Poe sits up and looks intently at his mentor. « Everybody knows Luke has been in exile for years. Words are already spreading about his involvement in Crait’s escape. For some reason, the only member of the first order who knows Luke is dead didn’t share it with the rest of his goons. We must use that to our own benefit and send Rey to treat instead, saying that she is speaking on behalf of Luke who is working on the bigger frame.»

« This is a very dangerous game. » answers Leia in a cautious tone.

« I live for danger. » says Poe, a devilish smile forming on his lips.

***

She is back in the cave, once again, sitting over that strange rock dominating the whole island, where Luke made her meditate for the first time. She is looking at the stars, the broken lightsaber in her hands and looking completely lost.

She has found nothing in her books to fix the broken weapon and despite being a skilled mechanic, she couldn’t mend what was damaged, because this isn’t just building and repairing. A lightsaber is something else. It almost has its own soul since it has its allegiance.

She pictures herself again on Starkiller, the lightsaber flying in her hand, then she sees Ben’s eyes : a mix of disbelief, wonder, and perhaps admiration hidden under the anger, as the handle lands in her hand.

Ben.

It has been more than a week, and she feels starved of his presence. She knows how wrong it is as he is an agent from the other side, or should she say the main player ? Yet, she replays in her mind their last talk, in the hut with him sitting on the floor and looking so… vulnerable under his carefully tailored attitude.

« It’s there. It lives in us. » his words echo into her mind. She knows he is right. Their bond is silent but it is there and she feels it. Her eyes fall again over the broken pieces of the lightsaber and she rubs her thumbs slowly against them.

It couldn’t show its allegiance, this time, because Ben and Rey no longer are two. They are one, no matter how far apart, no matter their points of divergence.

She looks at a distant spot in the star field and decides this is where he is. She shuts her eyes and projects all the peace she can find within herself toward him, because somehow, she knows this is what he needs.

***

He is in the training room of Snoke’s palace.

He can’t bring himself to call it his palace, because nothing around here is as what he would have designed for himself.

He is currently working on his lightsaber combat skills with three of his knights and unleashes his agressivity, to the point he uses his fists, knees and feet as well. His uncle would again have a fit if he could see him, but it doesn’t matter. This way of fighting has kept him alive until now and he won’t give up on it, not since this is half of the reason Rey and him survived in the throne room.

He tries to shake her name out of his mind as he spins, lightsaber above his head, before striking the knight closest to him. The connection between the blades emits some loud cracking noises as Kylo pushes all his strength forward.

He feels another knight coming at him from behind and raises his left leg behind him before delivering a massive kick that sends his opponent landing on his back. He uses that leverage to throw on the floor the knight whose blade was connected with his, then he suddenly spins and jumps, crashing his lightsaber against the last of his opponent’s weapon.

« Yield » he growls in a low voice, tension seeping from his body as he forces the knight on his knees with his strength.

The other knight disengages his lightsaber and bows his head in submission. Kylo takes a step back and disengages his blade before barking : « Leave. »

He waits until the 3 knights have deserted the room before putting his lightsaber at his belt and going to a corner to drink some fluid. He rolls his head to try and remove the tension then freezes when he suddenly feels a wave of peace reaching him.

He shuts his eyes and allows himself to simply dive in this feeling, knowing full well where it comes from.

***

 That night, as they are both asleep in their own corner of the universe, they appear right in the middle, in a place that looks like Takodana’s forest. They can’t tell which one has decided to bring the other there but as they look around them, they only feel a quiet environment. One where it is just them and for that, they are grateful.

He looks tired, almost hollow.

She looks desperate.

« Why in our dreams ? » she asks while kneeling on the ground.

He sits in his usual meditation position and looks like he is pondering. « It is perhaps safer this way. »

« Why... » She lowers her eyes, not knowing how to voice the next question.

« Why did it take so long this time ? » His voice is calm and there is no judgement in it. « I would imagine the Force knows what it is doing. »

« So we don’t control it ? » She looks surprised, but she can make sense out of that.

« Maybe that for now, the Force has to take over. This could get dangerous for us. »

« Because you are the Supreme Leader. »

« And you are Resistance. And neither of our side would understand. We would be branded as traitors and despite our skills, this would mean our end.»

« This game is too big for me, Ben. » She states, her voice slightly trembling. « I am barely functioning as it is. So much has changed. »

« I know. » he says, his voice calm and yet low.

« No you don’t ! I feel this thing in me… »

« Rey. » he cuts her with a bit more strength. « I know. » He looks at her intently in the eyes and she sees that he is telling the truth.

« I know what it feels like to live with that powerful awakening in you. I know how unfit the Jedi ways are to harness such a power. I know all about bumping with each step on that path. I know the feeling of walking on the edge of a cliff with the wind pushing you in the wrong way. »

She takes a hard breath and shuts her eyes, tears falling on her cheeks.

« I know all about the loneliness and the fear of being discovered for what you are. Don’t fear, Rey. Those that could have hurt you are no longer among us. Snoke can’t take control of you, and Skywalker is gone for good. »

« I know they all expect something from me. » She wipes her cheeks and shakes her head. « They don’t say it but it doesn’t need words.  And I can’t be that.»

« No, you can’t, because what they expect is a myth, not a reality. The Universe will always try to fit you in a box. Light side, Dark side, Resistance, First Order, the Empire, the Republic…»

« They want me to be a Jedi, and I can’t even fix the lightsaber. I don’t know how to do that.»

« Building a lightsaber is not basic skills. It requests a lot of focus gained through meditation and also guidance the first time we do it. We will have to meet, and I will guide you through it.»

She opens her eyes and looks at him, peace, almost instantly settling within her.

« I told you,on Starkiller. » he says almost tenderly. « You need a teacher. I can show you the way… »

The words die on his lips.

She lays on her side in front of him, both hands under her head. He does the same, one of his hands resting on the ground between them. They spend the rest of their dream gazing into each other’s eyes, their breathing perfectly synchronized, and an incredible feeling of peace filling them.

* * *

 


	11. Be careful what you wish for

* * *

 

Part 11 : Be careful what you wish for.

9 galactic standard weeks after Crait’s events.

 

 

This is a bad idea. From the moment they start exposing it, Rey knows that all about it is wrong. What would have Han say ?  I have a bad feeling about this ?

They are gathered around the bonfire like each evening, and Poe keeps listing the systems that answered to their call as well as their status in regard of the resistance.

« There is something huge to play with the correllian traders. They offered to supply us with some of their ships as long as we give them the guarantee that we aren’t a dead cause. »

« How can we make sure that this isn’t a double game to lure us out of hiding ? » Asks Rose who is now completely healed from that crash on Crait.

Finn is sitting next to her, in a very close proximity and even if nothing has transpired yet,  it is obvious that between those two, something is happening.

« The correllians have always been faithful to me. They were loyal to Han. My contact among them was an old friend of his… » Leia can’t go on. She tries to be brave, but the truth is that overcoming her husband’s death is a nearly impossible task.

Chewbacca is constantly next to her, like a giant guardian and when she falters, he picks her up. This is one of those moments and he puts a massive hand next to hers so she can grab it if need be.

It is also hard for him. Granted, he always knew Correllians had a shorter lifespan than Wookies, but Losing Han especially under those circumstances shattered something in him as well.

He can never talk about Ben. Partly because of his anger toward that little boy he had loved like a son and that grew up to become a monster. Partly also because he shot that same boy out of anger, and Maker, no matter why it happened, he hated himself for that.

 « This contact wants to make sure the rumors are true about the legendary jedi being back to take the first order down. » adds Poe while giving a brief look toward Finn.

Finn clears his throat and nods at the pilot then leans forward and looks straight at Rey. «  With Skywalker gone, we might lose our only chance to get the supply we need to rebuild our forces and beat down the First Order. If we get those ships, then the other worlds will send their troops.»

« We already have some promises form Ibaar, Krownest, Scipio and Taris if we can provide them with transports and weapons. » 

Rey feels everyone’s eyes on her and it is exactly like what she imagined. They turn to her for something bigger than her.

« Luke is gone. » She says, feeling uncomfortable under their gaze.

« This is why we need you. » answers Leia in a motherly tone.

Rey shakes her head and feels the tension rise in her.

« He barely had the time to give me the first lessons and even if he had, I don’t have a lightsaber anymore. I can’t fix the one I have. How do you want me to show them that they have a Jedi on their side when I am far from being one ? »

« They don’t need to watch you fight. » answers Poe a little too easily. « Just be there for the negotiations. Perhaps, do one or two force tricks and let us deal with the rest. »

« Force tricks ? » Rey says, and she almost feels offended by the careless tone Poe is using to talk about something she is considering more and more as sacred.

« What Poe is trying to say… » Adds Leia, who is actually dying to roll her eyes at the pilot for being so blunt « … is that they need to understand that there is still hope. They need a symbol. You are this symbol. »

She replays Ben’s words from the throne room in her head… You come from nothing. You’re nothing… but not to me.

Not to them either it seems.

Rey looks into the fire, her teeth slightly clenching. « If they expect the legendary Jedi, why would they settle with a nobody with barely any training ? »

Chewbacca addresses her an outraged howl then growls a little.

« I agree with him. You are not a nobody, Rey. » says Leia as gently as she can. Then she goes on, feeling the trouble in the young woman sitting a few feet away from her. « We plan on telling them that Luke is staying in his secret location and that he is preparing himself for what is to come. You will be his emissary since you are his padawan and Poe will be with you to escort you. He’ll be the one leading the negotiations.»

***

Their connection has been silent for the past two weeks, from the moment they woke up from that strange dream. He has mildly tried to reach out to her over the past few days, but the bond remained desperately silent, as if the cord was loose between them and couldn’t carry the message he was sending her.

Tonight is different. He feels an incredibly amount of tension radiating from her and even if she doesn’t materialize in front of him, he knows that she is here with him just as he is there with her.

He starts breathing as if he was trying to enter into a meditation trance, except he is doing it for her.

***

She is sitting on her bed with the pieces of lightsaber on her lap and she looks at them for what seems to be the millionth time. She remembers Ben’s promise in the dream space… he would help her fix this. He would teach her.

Yet, she is here and he is somewhere else, millions of light-years away, and since that night, she hasn’t heard about him. After a week, desperate to feel some kind of peace of mind, she had tried to reach out but nothing had worked.  At some point, she had wondered if he hadn’t decided to put an end to this and it had nearly crushed her to imagine herself alone again.

Suddenly, she feels compelled to change her breathing frequency and she doesn’t resist. Her body often reacts to the force and to the environment, and resisting makes things more complicated. So, she lets it happen. Her grip on the lightsaber loosen a little and the next thing she feels is the realization that somehow, she is synchronized with Ben. He is nowhere in sight, she doesn’t hear him, but he is with her and peace settle within her.

***

The next morning, she gets out of her hut and joins the others to announce that she will go with Poe. She will do what they want her to do.

***

« We have gathered intel about a potential uprising in some of the border’s planets. Of course, we can crush this rebellion before it starts existing and I already took the liberty of redirecting four of our resurgent-class battle cruisers to be stationed above the more pressing issues. »

Kylo Ren’s eyes are cold when they are on Hux. There is no sympathy, no admiration, not even a small sign of acknowledgement for the work done. It’s just contempt, anger and annoyance. He hates those moments in the throne room, but they seem necessary to establish Hux’ submission to him, especially since  his Knights of Ren are witnessing everything.

« That’s one liberty you shouldn’t have taken, general. You are to execute my orders and I am to establish the strategy. »

Hux’s face takes that infamous red color again and his eyes can’t hide the hatred he carries for the new supreme leader. If only he could find a way to end him…

« But, Supreme leader, this is an opportunity we can’t… » Once again, the ginger haired man feels his windpipe being constricted, and yet another vein burst in his left eye. He is released after a few seconds and falls on his knees. Another humiliation he will make Ren pay for.

« I do believe you still are in need of functioning air pipes. See that you don’t give me another reason to test your endurance with air deprivation. have you located the resistance ? »

Hux rubs his throat and chokes a little before answering « No. But we have a few leads to follow. »

« You will follow the leads, but you will not attack or reveal yourself. I want the highest level of secrecy on this. Is that clear, general ? »

Hux bows against his will and grits his teeth. « Yes, Supreme leader. »

***

Once the general has left the throne room, Kylo Ren nods at his knights who line up in front of him.

« What is the real status of Hux’ army ? »

One of the knights steps forward and bends a knee in sign of submission.

« My lord, half of the military forces are currently being redirected toward Parnassos in secret. It is said that the commanders of those ships are the general’s most loyal  soldiers. »

Kylo Ren nods and leans back against his throne, tapping a finger over his chin.

« if he turns his forces against those not being in the conspiracy,  he will certainly win, as the other captains will be reluctant at first to attack since those in front of them will be supposed to be allies. There is only one way then. »

« My lord ? » Says the knight, still kneeling in front of his master.

« You are assigned to the mission of taking out the seditious, one by one and as quietly as possible.  We will undermine Hux, and when he is powerless enough, we will get rid of him. »

* * *

 


	12. The price of being who we are

* * *

 

Part 12 : The price of being who we are.

12 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

 

« All right, do you have everything you need ? » Poe gives a meaningful look to Rey.

She adjusts her outfit, a retelling of Luke’s  old Jedi attire they found in his abandoned hut, then covers herself with the sand colored cape to avoid being too obvious. She managed to reattach the lightsaber parts together to make it look like a functioning weapon, even if the system remains desperately dead. The item rests now at her belt under the cape and Rey feels like she is wearing a disguise instead of being a true Jedi.

She nods, tension written in her face. « let get on with it. » she says, eager to be finished with this assignment. She isn’t particularly fond of tricking people, but she knows this is the only way to kickstart the resistance again.

Poe leads her out of the hangar where the Falcon has been hidden, then head straight down the street, to their meeting point with Tash Mereel.

« We are supposed to meet him in a bar. » says the pilot with his usual devilish confidence.

« In a place full of people ? What if we are being spotted ? »

« It doesn’t work that way. » Poe winks at Rey then stops in front of a dirty looking place in one of the poorest part of the city. « It’s easier to hide in a crowd.  Come on ».

***

Instead of going to the counter to ask for information regarding a particular customer, Poe leads Rey straight to the back room and comes in with confidence. He immediately spots three people. Tash, that he expected, a Twi’lek and a female mandalorian.

« Seems like you found yourself some company, Tash. »

The corellian stands and crosses the space between them, grabbing Poe by the shoulders. « Long time no see, kid. »

Rey stays back, her hands joined in front of her. She has kept her habit from Jakku. Never get close unless you really need to…

« Yeah, I know. It has been a bit hectic up there. ». Poe turns his head and nods at Rey. « This is Rey. She is master Skywalker’s padawan. »

Tash drops his hands and comes closer. Rey then realizes that the man looks about the same age as Han and a bit older than Luke. She tries to ignore the feeling constantly hitting her when she thinks of Han’s passing then nods at the man. « Hello. »

« Incredible », says the man in a low voice. « That makes two Jedi ».

« I’m still in training. » answers Rey as quietly as she can, considering the tension building more and more in her.

Tash turns and looks at the female mandalorian « Are you convinced, now ?  »

«  How can you be so sure she’s a true Jedi ? » Says the woman from under her helmet.

Rey looks at the chair where Tash was previously sitting, raises a hand and makes it slide back. She looks back at the mandalorian, not losing her cool attitude.

« So, there is really hope. » Adds the Twi’lek.

« Leia wouldn’t send me if there was no hope.» simply states Poe.

« Come on, my friends. Lets settle around the table. We have much to talk about. »

***

  4 hours later, Poe and Rey are back in the falcon. He is reporting to Leia from the cockpit after  Rey decided to lock herself into one of the private areas.

« How did it go, commander ? » Says Leia in a tone betraying the affection she has for Poe Dameron.

« Quite well, General. We have secured 5 cargos from the Correllian trade federation,  as well as 7 reformed X-Wings. Rey saw them. She thinks we can put them back into flying condition. The Twil’ek rebels will give us some droids and the mandalorians alliance is ready to send us troops. »

« This is a very good start. Poe… how is Rey holding up ? »

Poe turns toward the cockpit access and sighs. « I’m not sure. Leia,  I am aware I don’t know her so much, but she is awfully silent compared to what Finn babbled about for weeks. »

Leia doesn’t answer just yet and seems to ponder something very carefully. « This is perhaps the aftershock. She was never prepared for all of this. Bring her home as soon as you can. We’ll take care of her. »

***

  Traitor : this is the word replaying in her head over and over again. Traitor, liar… all the words she would have once thrown at him and that she now uses over herself.

She is helping rebuild the resistance. She is doing her part and she is doing it well, but the reality of what it means tears her apart.

He is Supreme Leader of the First Order. The former monster in the mask. The Jedi killer. The rightful heir of Lord Vader.

 And she doesn’t want him to die. Or to be captured. Or to be hurt.

But then, what does she want ? Him to turn back to the resistance ? That’s not realistic and she knows it. He wouldn’t make that move, and the resistance would never welcome him, because they don’t understand. They can’t.

She wraps herself tighter in the sand colored cape. His scent is nearly gone and she wonders once more why it is so important to her to identify him through this sense. When she is under that cape, she nearly feel invincible, as if he was hovering around her to give her strength.

He is no monster. She knows it from those few shared moments. Damaged, yes. Torn ? more than likely. Lost ? At least as much as she is. However, only she is aware of that and she will never have any way to explain this to anyone around her. Not even… not even his own mother who is so certain all hope is lost.

Rey shuts her eyes and knows that she shouldn’t try, but she project herself across the universe to try and feel him. Wherever he is, whatever he does, even if he is planning her demise, she needs to know he is there.

***

He feels her as he is scanning the holovid to get the latest reports from his knights. Hux has carefully deployed his assets and it is a true spiderweb woven through the First Order’s core. Taking it down is going to shatter the whole organization.

He leans back in his chair and shuts his eyes, allowing himself to bathe in the feeling of her presence. He wishes he could see her, or hear her. He needs her peace right now, because the odds are clearly not on his favor.

He breathes a little more slow, and he is certain their lungs are slowly synchronizing.

If he is honest with himself, he doesn’t understand what this girl does to him or why he cares so much. Is it because they have matching powers ? He has that with the knights, even though only hers have the same raw and untamed characteristics.

All he knows is that he is craving for something and she is associated to it. Could they build something new ? Something that would change the future of the world as they know it ? He wants so badly the end of all that has ever hurt him.

No more politics. Politicians are just self centered and they forget down to what should be the most important things in their life.

No more darkness and light. The force is the force and dividing it only create divisions in people.

No more… no more what ? Even if he was achieving it, would his life change ? He lost everything already.  All he has left, as strange as it is, is her.

He doesn’t want to think anymore. He wants to sleep, and go back to their dream forest on Takodana.

***

She pictures the wet grass under her cheek and hands. She sees his hair floating in the soft wind and his fingers slightly gripping the ground but his eyes never leave hers and it’s like he can see her soul. Their breathing is synchronized, slow, peaceful.

There is no war. No first order, no resistance. Just them and the sounds from the forest. She hears some distant laughters carried by the wind, then everything grow quiet and she hears the sound of his breathing, realizing it could be hers.

She opens her eyes and she knows that if she ever loses him, if he ever dies, she will follow him. There will be no choice in that, for one cannot survive with half a life.

* * *

 


	13. A consuming truth

* * *

 

Part 13 : A consuming truth

14 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

 

Having been on guard duty for the past 4 hours inside of the Falcon with Rose, Finn runs down the ramp then up the hill to warn Leia about the message he just received.

He finds her in Luke’s hut which has become her favorite hideout during the day.

Some believe that she is mourning and that she is slowly letting death come to her. She has after all, lost all her reasons to live, right ? Her son, her husband, and now her twin brother ? Those thinking like that have noticed the shift in the line of command with Poe taking the lead more often than not during negotiations or for strategic decisions. For them, it’s the sign of an upcoming major change regarding the former princess.

Those who have been by her side for a longer time know that she is a fighter. They heard from Admiral Ackbar, prior to his demise, that this woman is the one that barely flinched in front of the destruction of her home planet. She survived Vader’s torture, and years of harassing work to defeat the empire. They know that she was among the troops on Endor and the part she took to disengage the shields of the second death star.

They know Leia isn’t a quitter. She mourns for her losses, but she doesn’t fall. She will never fall. And for them, in the secrecy of that hut, she works on strategy and on finally taming the force within her own body, when it is obvious that its use comes so naturally to her.

People love to assume, but assuming isn’t knowing, and in that hut, it is something else that Leia is searching for, something nobody expect because to expect it, you would need some kind of prior experience with what it is. In the secrecy of that hut, Leia tries to transcend death and reach out to her twin. Not out of despair because of the amount of her losses, but because she knows force ghosts still have the ability to guide other Jedi. And lately, there are some immediate and desperate needs.

« Luke » she whispers, as she has done so many times through time and space.

« Luke, I need you… come to me… » Her eyes are shut, her expression, the perfect picture of serenity and yet, her heart aches, because she feels nothing.

Finn knocks at the door and waits, not wanting to barge in out of respect for the elder woman.

Leia sighs and looks at the door « Come in. » 

Finn enters the hut and slightly bow his head, a gesture that comes naturally to him in front of her. « I have just received a communication from Tash Mereel. The Cargos from the corellian trade federation have been sent to pick up the troops on Mandalore. The Twil’eks are shipping the droids  to the new resistance base. everything should be on site in less than 12 hours, including the reformed X-Wings. »

Leia lets out a breath and nods. « Good, very good. Any news from commander Dameron ?»

« Not yet, but we are not expecting any message until tonight. »

« I hate the idea of him being on his own in that quadran. He is such a hot head. This will put him in troubles, someday. »

Finn chuckles a little and shakes his head. « No offense, but Poe can’t be different. »

« Do you think I don’t know that ? » Leia arches an eyebrow then chuckles a little « That boy has fire, I will give you that. He reminds me… he reminds me a lot of how we were in the old times. Daredevils, the whole lot of us. » She looks at the items in the hut. The whole space is a true sanctuary dedicated to her brother’s memory.  «Luke had that fire, but he was a lot more innocent. Poe reminds me of Han from time to time. Unpredictable, uncontrollable, terribly frustrating, also.  And despite all this, he gets under your skin.»

She looks back at Finn, decided not to drown in her memories once more. « Have you talked to Rey recently ? »

Finn’s face fall a little. He shakes his head as sorrow fills his eyes. « She spends all her time in between the remains of that tree or in that weird cave.  This isn’t good and it’s like no one can truly reach her.»

« Jedi sometimes look like they walk among us without truly being with us.  It was sometimes like this with Luke. Like he had access to another level of existence and that this level was slowly taking him away. »

***

Deep breaths in.

Deep breaths out.

She reaches out and feels the island, from the highest point on the cliff to the bottom resting on the solid ground underwater. She feels the darkness, the light, and in between, the balance. With life comes death, with death comes new life.

 In the wind, she hears laughters but the sound vanishes as fast as it appeared.

One of the sacred Jedi books is by her side, open, and displaying  a very detailed drawing showing the inner battle each being has to face while leading it’s life. The character’s soul is split in half, between darkness and light.

One of the side is female, the other is male. Both are intertwined, holding each other as if their life depended on it and yet they seem to struggle. On each side are representations of tests, trials, virtues, sins and temptations. The pulls… the many pulls that destroy the balance.

Rey doesn’t need to understand the language of that particular book to know what it means.  There is no good and bad side. There is a middle ground, making a being whole, and polar extremes that are the opposite of balance.

The light is the side of extreme serenity, but where things become unmoving, unlived, unfulfilled.

The darkness is passion and action, but in its extreme form, it bends toward greed, need and the will to dominate.

She opens her eyes and looks at the ocean in front of her. Neither side is good. Taking side is the ultimate sin.

She hears Ben’s voice in the throne room once more.  « It's time to let old things die. Snoke, Skywalker. The Sith, the Jedi, the Rebels… »

« The First Order. » she whispers in the wind. « Everything must end… you are right. But not like this.  Not through destruction. Through balance. We must find a way to make peace. »

She lowers her eyes toward the book and looks at the representations of each side of a person’s soul, female and male, united in a same struggle.

« Where are you, Ben ? I can’t do this on my own. This has to be us both.» She looks back at the sky with a longing far deeper than the one she ever had when she was waiting for her parent’s return.

Behind her, she fails to see the blue forms that materialized from the moment she opened that particular page of the book. She is not ready to see them. But they know everything about her.

***

« My lord, General Hux has set a new course for the Finalizer. He is currently heading to the unknown regions toward Ilum. »

Kylo Ren slightly narrows his eyes. He is well aware of what Hux can expect to find on that planet. The crystal caves. The fool probably wants to power up another super weapon. Not only does he not learn from his mistakes, but on top of it, his strategy is once again flawed.

Each time a super weapon has been created, millions of galactic credits have been spent to built it, and for what benefit? Blowing up entire systems? This doesn’t stop a rebellion. This fuels it. Using this is not making war to maintain peace. It is using terror to keeps the Universe on its knees.

Hux doesn’t want to find a solution to stop the divisions. He is as bad as Snoke. He relishes in chaos and mass murder turns him on. How many times has he caught him with Phasma after a particularly bloody encounter with the rebels ?

« Ask Rassth Ren to leave immediately and to follow the Finalizer. I want to know exactly what is being done on Ilum. Send also Tanoras Ren and Kandar Ren to explore the planets around Ilum. If Hux is planning on building a new super weapon, it will be near the kyber crystal source. I want to know everything happening there. If need be, contact the bounty hunters and send them on spying missions to gather intel. »

« Yes, my lord. » answers the knight, his head slightly bowed and still staying on one knee.

« As for you, Tarath Ren, you will see if there have been First Order credits diverted from the regular flow. If it is the case, report to me immediately, but do not make any attempt at correcting the mistake. »

Kylo Ren waves his hand to dismiss his first knight then stands from the throne and leaves for his quarters, his face staying perfectly neutral as he crosses the path of many people working inside of Snoke’s palace.

Sooner or later, things would have to change.

***

Around the fire, that night, the talks are a little more animated than usual. Not only Poe had reported sooner than expected but he has arrived on Ahch-to a few moments before, when he was only due to return 3 days later.

« This is big.  A few systems have taken back their independence after Snoke’s demise. Apparently, there is a rift in the line of command of the First Order. This might be our chance. Some will certainly want to remain neutral, given the fact that they have been pulled on one side, then the other… but some have grudges and will certainly want to join forces with us.»

Leia has that soft smile on her lips. Not one of triumph, but one of relief. They might find a way to live, after all. If the resistance grows to become more than an embryo, then hope remains intact…

 Hope…

Rey’s look is distant as she is watching the flames. The voices of her companions are drowned by the force of her own thoughts. A rift in the line of command. This is good news for them. This is a chance at survival. She should rejoice.

She can’t and that frightens her.

The only thoughts forming in her head are about him. Where is he ? Is he safe ? Is he on the winning side ? Why is she no longer able to see him and to talk to him since the dream ? Has something happened to him ?

« Rey ? Hey girl, are you listening ? »

She jumps a little, startled by Finn’s voice. She plasters a smile on her lips but it doesn’t reach her eyes. « It’s the shock… it means so much if… if they are divided ! »

Still in his flying suit, Poe raises the cup he is holding. « To our future victory ! »

They all follow suit, and Rey makes the gesture, but inside, she is split in half. She wants the survival of her friends more than anything. She wants to be a part of what they are. She wants to be one of them.

And yet, her soul aches for him and his safety because she knows that without him, there is no balance for her, and without her, no balance for him. If they fail, the force bond will consume them, of this she is certain.

Now, she understands. Without each-other, they will never be free.

* * *

 


	14. Leaving Ahch-To

* * *

 

Part 14: Leaving Ahch-To.

15 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

 

Leaving Ahch-To is at the same time easy and hard.

Rey knows that this place is unfit to shelter a large resistance facility, yet, the prospect of leaving behind the high cave, the meditation stone and the dark pit makes her feel uneasy.

She explores those areas for the last time and can’t even promise herself she will come back.  Jakku had once seemed like home. Ahch-To has never been home. It is a place for questions. Sometimes for answers but this is not where she is destined to be.

She returns to the dark pit for the first time since the night she physically connected with Ben. She stands in front of the reflecting surface on the wall, but nothing shows up.

Everything remains silent.

She feels the darkness around her, but it is in no way aggressive. It feels like smoke slowly dancing around her and brushing against her skin. A tempting invitation perhaps, but by no means a command.  She slowly moves her hands, her eyes focused over her palms. In an almost sensual dance, the dark side teases her, rubbing over her skin and yet, slipping through her fingers.

Her eyes return to the reflecting surface. Somehow, she knows she won’t get any more answers from here.  This place is not there for small questions. It is here for defining moments.

If she wants to know what is happening to Ben, she has to leave.

***

Leaving Ahch-To is difficult.

Leia can’t truly say that this is Luke’s resting place, since he dissolved to become one with the force. The last of the Skywalkers is at the same time nowhere and everywhere.

Yet, she formed a silly attachment to her brother’s hut as if it was the last thing she could hold on to in order to feel connected to him. Chewwie has packed all his belongings and has carefully stored them in the Falcon but something lingers in that place and as she stands in the middle of it, Leia’s eyes fill with tears.

He appears right behind her, a shining beacon of light in the darkness that has become her life.

« You are not leaving anything behind, Leia. » he says, and he wishes he could wrap his arms around her to shield her from everything but this is not how things work in the realm he now exist within. « This was never a happy place for me. »

« I wish you had never left me. » her voice is trembling, and the poised princess, the tough general, is unable to maintain the control over her own feelings. « I wish everything would have been different from the start. I wish we could have been raised together. I wish you would have never taken that Jedi path. We had so little time. I thought we would have more, but it was a flicker in time, and then you were gone.  You are all gone.»

« Don’t discard the moments of joy you had because of the pain this life has caused you. There is no perfect path. Under other circumstances, we could have remained strangers. I would have been a farmer, taking over after uncle Owen. You would have been the next ruler of Alderaan. You would have never met and married Han.»

She turns, allowing herself to be bare with her feelings. « If we leave this place, will you still be able to appear for me ? »

« I will, each time you truly need me. » The smile he gives her is very reminiscent of the one he had as a young man. She has a very brief flash of him climbing the stairs with Han right after the demise of the first Death Star and her heart constricts.

***

Leaving Ahch-To is the first step : the first step in the rebirth of the resistance.

Poe has already left with Luke’s X-wing and is currently preparing his friends’ arrival in the new base on Rabaan. He knows is in charge, at least for now, even if no word has been spoken between him and Leia regarding this matter. There is a strong understanding between them, one that goes beyond any line of command.

 He wouldn’t go as far as saying he is the son she never had, even if some resistance members like to make this kind of connection, but if he is being honest with himself, then he must admit he has grown to respect and love that amazing general.  Almost like… yes… like a son would love his mother. A very wild son living to annoy his mother, he should perhaps admit, and for this, she would surely agree.

The last events have taken their toll on her, he understands that perhaps better than most but he is confident in her ability to overcome the pain. She is, after all, the princess that defied an Empire. All she needs is time, and time is what he will give her, until she is ready to put him back in his place again before taking over.

For now, he is coordinating the troops, sorting out the supplies and organizing the large facility hidden underground.

He sees the sparks everywhere and he knows that soon, they will fully light an unstoppable fire that will bring the First Order down.

 ***

Leaving Ahch-to is a challenge.

Going back on active duty may change everything. Yet, Rose and Finn know that what is building between them since Crait is strong enough to remain alive,no matter the location.

He calls himself her friend. She knows he is more than this. Yet, he is too preoccupied by Rey to understand the shift in their relationship. Then again, Rose was always very perceptive and… he is a former stormtrooper. She doubts being tuned with his own feelings was ever part of his conditioning.

She simply hopes that once on Rabaan, he won’t forget to visit with her in the hangar, where she is sure to spend most of her days and quite a few nights.

A part of him would love to be a mechanic, like her. He claims this is because she exposes her field of work with such a passion, he can only like it. He knows deep down that this is because he would love to spend all his time with her, no matter what it means.

Rose turned his priorities upside down, from the moment he met her on the Raddus. Their little adventure across the stars brought them close, nearly dying together on the Supremacy sealed a sacred bond between them, but it is perhaps her attempt at saving him on Crait that has branded him forever.

Now that he tasted the exhilarating feeling of truly mattering for someone, he can’t get enough of it. On Ahch-To or somewhere else, he is certain that as long as Rose remains around him, he will be fine.

***

Rey is giving one last look toward the ocean as she is standing by the Falcon’s ramp. She knows everyone has boarded and is waiting for her, yet she needs this last moment of loneliness and she allows herself to take it before she has to go back to being the Jedi they need her to be. 

The wind brushes over her face while the ocean scent overwhelms her senses.

Peace. Serenity…

***  

He can smell the ocean, like the one he has known as a child on Kashyyyk. Out of a week of constant tension, this is his first moment of peace and he is determined to take it.

He sets down the holopad containing Tarath Ren report and shuts his eyes. 

His breathing evens out. He knows it’s not a memory…

*******

She feels the distinctive pull of her breathing synchronizing with his. He is still here, with her. Silent, invisible, and yet, unavoidable.

« Ben » she whispers, but the sound is drowned by a crashing wave.

***

Their breathing become one and so has to be their heartbeat. His fingers slightly flex then his hands move in fists.

He knows that the force won’t allow them to connect more than this yet he keeps trying to project himself to reach her.

His eyes bolt open and he watches the ocean through her eyes.

***

She slightly stumbles, the vision of the ocean in front of her being replaced by some windowless quarters, dark colored and filled with simple durasteel furniture.

Her lips slightly part and she is like frozen on her spot, trying to take in everything being displayed in front of her.

***

The visual connection vanishes almost as fast as it appeared and Ben stumbles before grabbing the edge of the table next to him.

« Rey… » his breathing picks up as he feels the connection weakening then being cut entirely. « No ! »

 He slams his palm over the table then lets himself down in a nearby chair before taking his head in his hands.

***

She is back to watching the ocean, the wind still blowing over her and enveloping her like a comforting blanket. Slowly, the message becomes clear and she knows it comes from the light side of the force.

There is much to discover and more to come. They barely scratched the surface and they need to be ready for more. She will have to research in her sacred texts any mention of visual connection. Perhaps, once she is settled in Rabaan’s base…

Behind her she suddenly hears in the wind:

« Balanced, united as one, two sides of a Jedi soul, equally grown in darkness and light, will look in the same direction. »

She turns on her heels, only to catch the glimpse of a vanishing blue light.

* * *

 


	15. Double game

* * *

 

Part 15 : Double game

17 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the First Order is on the bridge of the resurgent-Class Subjugator when it exits hyperspace. His eyes focused on the wide duraglass bay, he immediately takes in the battle occurring around Arkania. The Finalizer is already on site and has deployed his Tie Fighters against the two Corellian freighters currently maneuvering to make their escape. A few X-wings cover them, but Kylo can tell that the task is particularly difficult given the fact that they are outnumbered.

« Link me to the Finalizer. » He barks toward the communication officer. He raises his head and speaks with a very loud and clear voice. « General Hux, what is the current situation ? »

An holo projection of Hux appears a few feet away from Kylo. The Ginger haired general is his usual cold and bitter self, stiffly clad in his uniform. « We’ve received a distress message from the main mining station on Arkania as we were on our way back from Moraband. The resistance attacked the facility in order to rob the minerals that have been put in storage. »

« They are searching for raw material. General is the Finalizer’s tracker up and running in case those ships try and  make a jump through hyperspace ?»

« My lord, it takes months to install this kind of equipment on a ship such as this one. It has been impossible so far to get back the system installed on the Supremacy, due to the sabotage attempt it went through. »

Kylo’s eyes slightly narrow and his nostrils are flaring. « Then you’d better make sure those ships are going nowhere. ».

He waves a finger and the communication feed is cut.  His eyes look intently at the freighters and something slowly creeps in the back of his mind. What if she was in one of those transports ?

He observes as the Tie fighters swirl and engage their weapons around the weakening shields of the two large ships, and a flash of himself hesitating in front of the Raddus comes into his mind.

No ! Now is not the time to think about this! This is war time, and the resistance has attacked !

His blood boils more and more with each second passing then he makes a sharp turn and leaves the bridge for his quarters. He knows he can’t stay in the command center if he is unable to tame the conflict building in him. As quickly as he walks, he tries to project himself toward Rey.

His teeth are gritted as he barges in his quarters and locks them. His breathing comes out in sharp waves. He flexes his fingers and tries to center himself before shutting his eyes.

« Rey », he nearly growls in a low voice. He projects himself harder and feels like he is hitting an unbreakable wall. But he tries anyway, harder with each wave, and the veins on his temple are pulsating from the exertion.

He needs to know if she is in one of those ships, for if she is, he needs to find a way to stop the attack before harm comes to her.

***

 Rey  leaves the facility settled on one of the ridges of Arkania’s great canyon and is quickly heading back to the Falcon with the few fighters she took with her in order to supervise the loading of the minerals. The mission has been a success so far, but she is also aware of the fact that the resistance is currently under fire on orbit and that the odds are probably against them.

She instantly freezes, her grip tightening on her staff. She knows he is here. She feels the intrusion in her environment, except, this time, the contact attempt is more physical.

She takes a sharp breath and nods at the team she is leading to keep going while she enters her ship and goes to the far back, to isolate herself. She knows Chewwie will take off and pilot the Falcon toward space as soon as the ramp is being lifted.

« Ben » she states as firmly as she can once she is in one of the private quarters. Her breathing is slowly calming down and she centers herself in order to adjust to the intrusion she deeply feels in her personal mental space.

***

He feels like he is suffocating. The urgency of the situation makes him probe harder and harder, then suddenly, the wall breaks and she is in front of him.

He takes in her disheveled state, her staff still in her hand and the exhaustion he can reads on her face. « Tell me you are not in one of those ships.» he says in a low and burning tone.

She looks at him,  her breath catching in her throat and she can feel all of him. « You need to let us go. »

« Rey », he nearly growls. « Do you realize what is happening ? This is war ! »

« I know what it is ! »

« No you don’t ! the Finalizer is on orbit and is getting ready to blast you all ! Don’t you understand ? Hux is in control of half the forces you have in front of you. You need to get the hell out of here, now !»

« I thought you were the Supreme Leader. Make them stop !» Her breathing keeps coming in sharp and short waves.

« On behalf of what ? If I stop them, they will question my motivations, then my ability to lead them. The next in line is Hux. Do you really want to see what it gives to have him as the Supreme Leader ?»

Rey’s eyes immediately darken then narrow. « Then if you can’t do anything, I’d better settle in the battle station and see what I can do myself. »

Realization hits him like a ton of bricks. The Falcon. She is in the Falcon… All he has to do to save her, is getting close  to her ship and shield it until she can make a jump.

« Rey, listen to me carefully.  I’m going to do what I can. Get out of here as fast as possible. Then meet me in 12 hours. »

She frowns, her gaze being as intense as when they were in the forest on Starkiller Base. « Where ? »

« Lothal. Near the north pole, there is an hidden abandoned settlement there. Now go ! »

He sees her drop her staff and run away right before he cuts the connection.  He turns on his heels and exists his quarters in a hurry to reach the hangar bay.

***

As soon as he is out in space on his Tie-Silencer’s board, Supreme leader Kylo Ren hits the communication button.

 « General Hux, I want a complete focus over those freighters. It is crucial not to let the resistance have any access to those resources. I’m going in.»

Statics come out of the communication system, then a sharp answer.

« Yes, Supreme Leader. »

Kylo throws his ship into the battle and engages several times, while relying on the force to try and locate the Falcon. He finally makes visual contact with it and sees that it is under heavy fire.

***

 Rey’s sounds like she is suffocating instead of breathing. Sweat runs down the sides of her face as she focuses and fires at the Tie-Fighters she spots in her way.

« Chewwie, we’ve got to move ! they are too many ! »

She hears a loud snarl through the communication system and replies while blasting successively three attacking ships. « I know ! Tell Poe to make them jump ! Flip left !»

The Falcon suddenly flip two times then dives while Rey readjusts her aim and shoots the Tie-Fighter that nearly  blasted her canon.

« They are coming at us ! »

***

Kylo’s anger rises by the minutes as he notices two things simultaneously.

The first one is that his command is not being entirely followed, since the Falcon is under heavy fire. Hux knows exactly what that ship is and he also knows that it doesn’t contain the minerals.

The second one is that so far, three Tie-Fighters locked him as a target. He, of course, has dispatched them before heading straight to the Falcon, still, he can feels Hux’s sick game behind it.

Does the sniveling little womprat really think it would be that easy ?

For now, he has to make sure Rey gets out of this mess unharmed, but he will certainly deal with that later.

He projects the force around him and focuses over the Tie-Fighters having engaged the Falcon then over their pilot.  Using his mind probing ability, he confuses them enough to make them hesitate.

***

Rey feels more than she sees the shift in the behavior of the Tie-Fighters threatening her. She seizes the opportunity and blasts them, one by one, while Chewbacca goes on flying the Falcon through the wreckages slowly filling the area.

That’s when she sees him. She knows it’s his ship. She takes a sharp breath and immediately feels their connection flare up. The feeling, combined with the adrenalin running in her system is almost exhilarating.

 Kylo’s Tie-Silencer suddenly dives, spins and heads toward the freighters and she sees one of the Tie-Fighter getting close coming at him. She narrows her eyes, a wave of anger matching what she felt in the throne room hitting her hard. She starts screaming, her fingers firing as fast as they can and the force guiding her aim more than her eyes.

She makes the ship shatter, and when it’s gone, she is still firing at the remains.

* * *

 


	16. Repairing what has been broken

* * *

 

Part 16 : repairing what has been broken

17 standard weeks after Crait’s events

12 hours after the battle of Arkania

 

 

Rey has been searching for the facility entrance for nearly 10 minutes when she finally spots a sliding door partly concealed by frost. Looking at the ground, she can see that the snow is undisturbed. This place has been indeed abandoned for years.

The heavy jacket she stole from the Falcon barely shields her from the cold and she knows it would be unwise to remain outside for too long. She looks at the panel then extends her hand to project the force toward it. For a moment, nothing works, then after a while, she gets glimpses of the mecanism hidden inside.  She can hear some loud cracking noises before she can truly think about what should move, then the door slides open in a very slow motion.

***

There is no power in the old imperial facility and Rey makes her way through a large space remaining in permanent darkness. Not that it bothers her. She rarely had light with her when she was scavenging in the heart of the imperial ships on Jakku. 

She can see abandoned crates here and there, in a corner three Tie-Fighters rest in various state of construction or decay…

She feels Ben as soon as his ship hits the atmosphere. She instinctively turns toward the door, trying to tame the exhilarating feeling of his presence. He remains her enemy. He is on the other side. Worse, he is their leader. That makes him even more dangerous.

Her survival instinct tells her she should hide, but the part of her attached to the bond knows it would be useless. They can feel each other so accurately that any attempt would seem futile.

Instead, she waits for him, hoping he hasn’t led her into a trap. But even that, she can’t truly believe.

***

The upsilon-class shuttle lowers itself vertically and lands next to Rey’s battered X-Wing.

As he goes down the ramp, Ben looks at the near wreck Rey used to get here. Another sign of the state of decay the resistance is in. He should relish this knowledge and yet all he feels about it is deep annoyance.

He crosses the space between his ship and the facility in a few powerful strides, his black cape flying behind him. Once inside, he stops, spotting a figure standing in the middle of the main space, in the semi-darkness.

She looks at him, a black shape emerging from the blinding white of the landscape outside of the facility, and a part of her falls toward him. Yet, she remains unmoving.

« What were you doing on Arkania ? » he says without further ado, and she can feel the anger powering each of his words.

« You know what we were doing. » she answers with what she hopes sounds like a steady voice.

« Not the resistance, Rey ! You ! » His fingers are flexing and she can feel the restrain he is putting on himself. In other circumstances, he would have unleashed his rage.

« I am the resistance ! » She says in a powerful voice.

« You can delude yourself and think you are one of them, you’re not ! » his nostrils flare and she sees him now accurately in the darkness. He is more than upset. He is seething.

« What am I, then ? Tell me ! If I am not resistance, what am I ?» It’s her turn to sound unnerved. First, she had that argument with Finn over her need to leave so soon after a very difficult battle, and now this ?

« I think you know very well what you are. » he takes several steps closer, and despite his determined attitude, she is decided to hold her ground.

She looks up at him and drowns in his eyes, but she forces herself to resist to the call of their bond. « I’m not going to join you like that. If this is why you brought me here, then I should go. ». She makes a move to circle him and leave but he raises a hand and she instantly stops.

« I didn’t bring you here to turn you. » his voice is a bit quieter and that surprises her. « If you have to do this, if you have to put yourself in harm way all the time for those rebels, you need to at least have the right tools to save yourself. »

She is searching his face, and there is a bit of gentleness there, under the carefully crafted angry mask. « Why are we truly here, Ben ? » she almost whispers, partly surrendering to what is linking them.

His name on her lips… that is perhaps his biggest downfall. This is what makes his resolve crack all the time, what made him choose his path in the throne room, and what might be ultimately his demise.

He lowers his eyes over the partly mended lightsaber hanging loosely from her belt, then looks back at her. « We are here to repair what we have broken. »

***

The first steps are quite simple. Taking apart the whole mechanism is easy for Rey. She is sat on the floor in one of the side rooms near the hangar, the only light coming from a fire Ben created by igniting pieces of old material with his lightsaber.

They have remained silent for the most part despite their closeness. They manage to avoid physical contact for fear of getting visions of a future neither is ready to admit. But even in silence the other’s presence is intoxicating, a mix of comfort tainted by yearning hitting them wave after wave. 

« I don’t get why we needed to meditate prior to this. » Rey simply says as she unscrews another part.

She briefly looks at Ben who is on his knees, watching intently what she is doing. « The kyber crystal isn’t just a material. It bonds with the force user wielding the lightsaber. If you don’t meditate, you can’t get in contact with the stone. »

She removes one of the big parts of the handle then uncovers the crystal and rubs a finger over it. « It’s a nice blue color. »

« That’s the color for the protectors. » His voice is soft, almost gentle.

The longing and sadness in his eyes as he is watching the broken weapon is almost tearing her apart. « It was your grandfather’s.  Leia told me. »

 His facial features contort at the mention of his mother, and he can’t help the biting tone of his voice. « I’m surprised she would talk to you about him. She hates dark side users. »

Rey lowers her eyes then resumes her work on the handle, taking out more pieces. « Your mother is more accepting than you think. » she says almost cautiously.

He barely nods. « She likes you. Despite your darkness, she truly does. »

Rey sets her tool down and raises her eyes to meet his. For a few seconds, there is no sides, no conflict, no impeding war. It’s just the two of them, bare in front of each other in a way they will never be with anyone else.

« I’m not a darksider. » Her voice is calm but her eyes are daring him to say otherwise.

He has no choice, he takes the bet. « Tell me, Rey, what did you feel yesterday when you blasted the Tie-Fighter targeting my ship ? »

« Nothing special. I did what needed to be done. » She holds his gaze the best she can, but something in her boils and is ready to erupt.

He knows it. He sees the slight quivering of her lips as her memories are replaying. Her eyes darken and become as hard as they were on Starkiller base. « We were connected last night. Deeper than we have ever been. I know Rey, i know it all. Say it. »

She remains silent, but there is something steely in her attitude and after a while, she feels the need to voice what he already knows.

« Anger. I acted out of anger. » She knows what it means. It is is the road to a very dangerous path.

He looks back at her with an intensity she can barely sustain and nods. He takes the lightsaber from her hands without making contact with her skin then extracts the pieces of kyber crystal with ease. « We’ve cracked it.»

« Is it bad ? » She asks, all too happy to cover another topic.

« Kyber crystals can’t be mended. What’s broken is broken. We can only work around it and see how the energy will react once it flows through it. »

« It’s like people then. » she adds almost impulsively. Ben looks back at her then bows his head after a while.

« Like I said, it’s not just a material. »

***

It takes them 5 hours  and two meditation sessions to reach a point where the lightsaber will be functioning again. Rey is standing with the handle in her right hand and is ready to power it up.

« Remember, the cross guard is mostly made to evacuate the excess of generated power for the blade. »

She nods  and flips the handle in her hand once, then twice, testing its new weight.

« All right, ignite it. » Ben is standing in front of her and turns on his own saber as she presses the button.

In a characteristic noise, the lightsaber comes to life and at first, Rey looks mesmerized by the beauty of what she sees. The three pale blue plasma beams are solid and where she was expecting the same crackling and unstable feature of Ben’s weapon, she only see consistency and serenity.

She looks at his blade and can’t help but wonder why her own weapon is that different from his, given the fact that its crystal is also split in two.

Ben observes her for a long moment before answering to her thought. « I thought you would have understood by now. The crystal is tuned with its owner. » He nods at her weapon and says in a calm tone : «This is you. »

He then raises his blade and looks at the almost aggressive and seething red plasma beam. « And this is me. »

***

 They remain in the facility for a few more hours, not out of necessity, but simply because close proximity has a soothing effect on them. Again, barely any word is spoken, like on their last night in the Jakku desert. Neither of them is feeling inclined to cover topics that could divide them again.

For a few hours, they choose to remain on the same side, in a world where the First Order, the resistance and the war temporarily don’t exist. They eventually fall asleep in front of the fire, facing each other but being separated by the flames.

Tomorrow, they will go back to being enemies.

* * *

 


	17. Suspicions

* * *

 

Part 17 : suspicions

17 standard weeks after Crait’s events

36 hours after the battle of Arkania

 

Leia is in the hangar of the resistance base when Rey flies her X-Wing in. She doesn’t part from her mourning clothes, a fact too many are commenting, along with the pallor of her face and the constant sadness in her eyes.

She watches as Rey climbs out with a few items she holds protectively against her. There is an old jacket coming from the Millenium Falcon, a sand colored pile of fabric and something else wrapped in it. The elder woman comes closer, a peaceful smile on her lips.

« I was surprised to get your message. I thought you would remain away for a longer time. »

Rey steps closer, returning leia’s smile but being partly eaten by guilt. If she knew who she had spent her time with… At times, she is dying to tell Leia that she is connected to Ben, that there is something special between them, that she will never let go and how much she needs him.

 Another wave of guilt hits her for needing their enemy in her life so badly. Leia misinterprets the sadness flashing in Rey’s eyes and closes the space between them, taking the young woman in her arms.

« Oh, Rey, I know this is too much for you. »

Rey shuts her eyes and clutches even more the items she is holding against her. « I’ll be fine », she lies.

« Not now, no. But you will be, eventually. » Leia pulls back and cups Rey’s face in her hands, looking at her with an intensity making the young woman fear the general could read her. « I know they don’t understand you. I know they question your actions a lot. This is because they have never been around a Jedi. You remind me so much of Luke when he was your age… discovering everything, and making decisions that would sound crazy for us but that were making sense in the long run. »

Rey finally finds her voice. «I am not sure I am like Luke. » 

The older woman laughs and shakes her head « Oh I know. No one can be like Luke. That one was one of a kind. Reckless, impulsive when it is so obvious you are a survivor. What you have in common with him is that you have a good heart.»

The young woman nods a little and looks at the pile of items in her arms. « Leia… I fixed the lightsaber. »

The general’s face change from caring to amazed. « And it works ?  Like before ?».

« It’s a bit different now, but it perfectly works, yes. »

« How did you find your way through that ? I remember my brother saying that building a lightsaber was a complicated process.»

« I simply used my mecanic skills, and I let the force guide me. » The lie flows out of her mouth with too much ease and she hates herself for this, not only because it means betraying leia, but also because she feels like it betrays her bond to Ben.

No one would understand, but this link they share, has become more sacred to her than anything else in the universe.

***

« It appears, general, that some of your pilots need to resume their training at the academy. I found their lack of accuracy during the battle rather concerning. »

Supreme Leader Kylo Ren keeps his hands on the arms of his throne as his eyes are solely focused on Hux.

« In the heat of the battle, mistakes can be made, my lord. » The ginger-haired general hates more than anything the Supreme Leader’s way of thinking that he knows better than him who has been groomed for military leadership from a very young age.

« Mistakes targetting my ship instead of a target 3 times its size right behind it ? » Kylo’s eyes take a very dark hue as he glares at Hux. « Do not take me for a fool, General.  I do not tolerate betrayal. See that among your ranks any sedicious spirit is being purged. »

Hux is bracing himself for the force choke he is certain to get after such a declaration, then feels unsettled when nothing happens. « My lord I can assure you of the loyalty of my men to the First Order. »

« Very well. Then make sure they remember I am the First Order. » There is an underlying threatening tone to this declaration that Hux doesn’t miss.

He will have to be more careful for his next attempts.

***

« So, is it true ? » asks Poe out of the blue as him, Finn, Rose and Rey are hanging out during their watch outside of the base.  « You’ve rebuilt it ? »

Rey didn’t expect the question. She had been outside with her friends for the past hour and she had simply spent her time listening to Rose and Finn bickering  about all kind of things. It had sounded so normal...

« Yeah, I did. » she answered, taking the lightsaber from her belt.

« Damn Rey, it looks different ! » Finn takes the weapon from her hands and weights it.  « Why did you put those things on the sides ? »

She takes back the lightsaber, stands and moves away before looking at them « The kyber crystal has been severely damaged. I had to do a few modifications. » She looks at the handle in her hand as if she was pondering something, then she ignites the lightsaber.

Rose’s eyes widen in appreciation, the hue of the plasma beam being for her completely mesmerizing. She misses the looks Poe and Finn are immediately exchanging.

« It needed side vents to evacuate the excess of power not going up to the main beam. » Rey explains as she looks at her lightsaber.

Finn stands and waits before he finally says. « You know who has a crossguard like that. »

Rey turns her lightsaber off, but doesn’t remove her eyes from the handle. « Yes, I know who. But there wasn’t much choice to fix this, Finn. It’s very difficult to have access to new kyber crystals, especially in a time like this and as it was, it couldn’t properly function with a single blade anymore. »

« You are different. » He says before he can stop himself.

Rey looks back at him and attaches her weapon at her belt again before sitting back on her spot.

« Look at me ! » he screams, his eyes a mix of worry and disbelief.

She turns her head and looks at him, trying to keep in check her growing anxiety. « Of course I am different, Finn. I am trying to find my way through this on my own.»

« Come on, Finn, sit. » Says Poe before things can get worse. He knows that the former stormtrooper has been nearly obsessing over Rey and her behavior as of late.

Finn reluctantly sits and Rose immediately seizes his hand to keep him calm. However, his eyes remain on Rey. « And that means leaving for over a day after a battle like the one we faced ?  We didn’t even know where you were. You could have gotten yourself killed or injured and no one would have ever found you !»

« That means following my instinct and hoping i am not making the biggest mistake of my life. » She says, and realizes this is the most honest thing she has said about herself, lately.

« Rey, you can’t do this on your own, girl !  At some point, you’ll have to trust us.» He pleads, but deep down, he can see that wherever she is, he can’t truly reach her.

« I do trust you ! »

« Then tell us what you hide ! » Finn nearly screams as if it could anchor her back to them.

« I don’t know how to be a Jedi ! I don’t know how to be what you all want me to be ! There is no one left in this universe to guide me ! All the masters are gone and I am finding my way through this alone ! » She stands and doesn’t even bother to hide her conflicted feelings, almost wishing  she could scream at him that she is linked to their mortal enemy and that she doesn’t regret it, not even for a second, because t least, with him, she doesn’t feel so alone !

« Oh, Ben… » she thinks, and the simple echo of his name in her mind instantly melts the anxiety filling her mind.  Her features relax and she looks at Finn straight in the eyes.

« I need you to trust me. » she says, even if she knows that the bond in itself is an open betrayal to their cause.

« I am sure you are doing the best you can. » Says Rose as a peace offering. « And I am sure Finn knows it.» She squeezes the hand of the former stormtrooper who simply lowers his eyes and nods.

***

A few hours later, in the secrecy of his private quarters, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren reads an extensive report about Hux’ activities in the unknown regions.  He knows why a massive amount of Kyber Crystal is currently being harvested from Ilum. Millions of credits have vanished from the First Order assets and have been reinjected to fund a dozen of shaddy groups that the bounty hunters have been able to track down and list.

They all have a common point. They are gathering raw material and human ressources being sent to the largest moon orbiting around Ilum. Said moon is currently being drilled and probed and Kylo know exactly what it means.

The ginger haired fool prepares yet another superweapon. Given the current advance status of this new Starkiller, the building of this facility more than likely started under Snoke’s ruling.

Kylo Ren sets down his holopad and looks straight in front of him. He is now Supreme Leader. Any use of this weapon will be put on his account. Yet, he has no control over it. Had he not send his Knights of Ren, he wouldn’t even been aware of its existence.

He knew that the probabilities of a coup were already high. It seems now that the timeframe to see it being put to completion is shortening which means two things.

One, he can be assured that Hux will not relent at taking him down, which means, he might get creative about it. Two, he needs to either secure some forces on his side beyond the knights of Ren, or… or he will have to do something else.

***

Rey feels that Ben is beyond tense. She has been turning on her bunk for the past hour and despite feeling uneasy herself, she understands that what she is currently experiencing comes from him.

She knows she is breaching Finn’s trust. It has been her mantra since she returned from her watch duty with her friends. She is certain that deep down, he knows she hides something huge, something that might divide them on the long run.

 However, as she gets this intense feeling through their forcebond, what she is currently experiencing on the base quietens and settles in a small corner of her mind.

She tries projecting herself toward Ben, but she can’t seem to penetrate the gates of their connection. It frustrates her. She would want to be able to come and go as she pleases as scary as it might seem, considering who Ben is.

She takes a deep breath and projects herself again, without success. What if the tension was caused by another murder attempts ? She has seen the Tie-Fighters closing on him. She knows it has to be the crazy general’s doing.

« Ben… » She waits, but feels nothing. « Ben, please… tell me what’s going on ».

***

He knows she is within grasp, but he keeps his side closed. He doesn’t want her to know. Not for now. The resistance would take advantage of the situation and then…

Yet he craves for the moment when their mind melt and become one. He longs for the quiet moments spent in each other’s company and for the silent understanding passing between them, where they are two sides of a whole, against the rest of the universe.

* * *

 


	18. The weight of his memories

* * *

 

Part 18 : the weight of his memories

18 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

Mustafar’s castle seems to be a fitting place to arrange a meeting with the knights of Ren.

Supreme leader Kylo Ren knows that general Hux would never get close to this planet without being absolutely forced to. There are a lot of myths about the powers attached to this place, some carefully crafted by Palpatine himself, some others caused by the discomfort coming with being on a volcanic planet.

The smell of sulfur… it feels like hell settled in the core of the universe.

Kylo gets underground and reaches the Sith cave the castle is built on. It seems only fitting for what is to come.

He comes in with some powerful strides, the black cape flying behind him. He takes his place near the ancient altar and turns, watching the five knights in front of him. His face is blank as he looks at their masked forms.

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

Luke Skywalker has his hands full, these days. As more and more force sensitive are being sent to his academy, He struggles to keep some kind of balance in his teaching. There are the elders who are already walking the path of the Jedi while remaining in the facility, those in between and already knocking at that door, then there are the young ones, who have everything to learn and discover.

Luke doesn’t feel comfortable with the idea of accepting young children. He knows the way of the ancient Jedi order, but a part of him dislikes the idea of depriving a family from his child and a child from his family. He prefers recording the existence of those children, then welcoming them when they are ready to join, usually around the age of 15.

There are a few exceptions with orphaned children having nowhere to go. It happened twice with the previous generation, a once with this one. Kira was brought to them five years before when she was 7, and since that time, she has been training relentlessly, perhaps even more than those having been longer with the group.

Kira has always been a quiet child, observing more than talking and Luke often wonders if something is hiding behind her green eyes.

However, at the moment, this is the least of his concern, for what he has in front of him is far more preoccupying.

Ben is holding his lightsaber with both hands and is wielding it with an aggressivity Luke has rarely seen in a fighter. His forms are wrong and he is fighting perhaps more like a scoundrel in a bar brawl than as a Jedi knight. He is punching, kicking and is clearly lacking the refinement going with the art of dueling. There is too much rage in those moves. One would have never guessed he technically is the last prince of the long gone planet Alderaan.

After a particular violent punch letting his opponent on the floor with a broken nose, Luke cuts the fight with a loud comment.

« Enough. Sancta, ask Lorion to heal your nose. Ben, come with me. »

Without waiting, Luke turns and head to the sacred part of the grounds, his hands joined in front of him. He fails to see the look of pure contempt Sancta is throwing at Ben, or the exhausted and tense features of his nephew.

***

Kylo looks at the knights one by one, taking enough time to scrape the surface of their mind. He is not a fool, however. Each and every one of them is able to conceal their deepest and more important thoughts. This is part of the training they got to survive Snoke’s proximity.

« I asked you to join me here because we are facing a rebellion within our own ranks. »

He pauses, analyzing the body language of his knights and is not disappointed when he sees that all five of them remain completely unmoving.

« General Hux is currently working on a large scale project following one of Snoke’s last orders and the fact that I haven’t been warned let me suspects that in his frame of mind, I am probably not to see it reach completion. »

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

« You can’t take this path each time you fight ! Ben, this is not the right way ! »

Another day. Another training session. Another lecture.

If he listens to his uncle, all he does is wrong. All he thinks is wrong. All he feels is wrong. But really, should he care ? Luke is just the last one of a long list of persons who never truly understood what was going on in his mind.

Ben looks perhaps a bit defeated. The truth is, he is exhausted. The night before has been particularly challenging. In his nightmares, he hears millions of screams and sees beams of red light eating away whole planets. He has been warned against force visions and he isn’t even sure this is one of those. He probably has read too many stories about the great war against emperor Palpatine and it is getting to him.

« It’s just a training session, Uncle Luke. » he says with his usual melancholic tone.

« It’s the path to darkness ! You let anger fuel you ! »

« Are you never angry, uncle Luke ? »replies the nephew with the quietest tone possible.

Luke seems taken aback a little. He opens his mouth and shuts it before replying « Yes I can be angry, like everyone else. But I don’t let it infuse in my fighting style or in my decisions. As a Jedi knight, I have a duty to guard myself against the dark side, and you must put all your effort in this because this is your greatest weakness. »

***

 « You have all been sent to gather data and to work with the bounty hunters in order to see what is truly happening. With your help, I now know exactly what’s going on and I know how to react accordingly. »

Kylo turns and puts his hands on the altar while the five remain unmoving.

« Those ruins are very ancient. Just as is this place, this whole cave, which has been the setting for many defining moments regarding people like us. »

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

Kira is once again alone in the meditation circle. Her hands on her knees, her eyes are closed and her whole being is entirely offered to welcome the force. Having reached the age of 13, her body has already started its transformation and she knows that some of the 16 years old are watching her in a way completely improper for future Jedi.

She feels Ben joining the circle and kneels not far from her. Keeping her eyes closed, she decides to speak once she is sure he is settled.

«  He is an hypocrite, you know this, right ? »

Ben looks at her, his own hands on his knees. Kira has always intrigued him, from the moment she joined them. She may have been a child then, she had a mind transcending her age.

« What he told you about his anger. He is angry too and sometimes he uses it. »

« Were you spying on us again ? » Ask Ben in a quiet tone.

« It’s not spying if you come to the area I am hiding in to talk about your private things. » Kira opens her eyes and looks at the young man in a way that makes him once again question her level of maturity.

« I’m not like him. » she adds calmly. « Neither are you. »

Ben opens his mouth to say something but she immediately cut him. « And this is fine. »

Ben chuckles a little then looks away. « And you plan to tell him that how ? By the way master Skywalker, your ways don’t apply to people like us ? »

« No. He wouldn’t understand. » She pauses and waits for him to look at her. « We could simply leave this place. »

« I can’t leave that place, Kira. He is my uncle and I have been sent here because this is what my parents wanted. I doubt they would just leave me be, especially since I seem to be straying from the good family habits.» There is an underlying bitter tone in his voice.

***

« We were never meant to be Jedi. Yet, we are not Sith. We may be their heir, our purpose is different. »

Kylo slighly tilt his head and turns it toward his knights without looking at them.

« We serve no one but ourselves. This is the oath we took a long time ago. We are our own masters and we will not lay beneath the army of General Hux. »

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

Ben’s breathing is slightly unsteady as each time he is trapped in a nightmare. This time, the intensity of his fear is overwhelming. He hears the screams, he sees the torn flesh and the red flashes of light taking over the whole sky. He feels the millions of souls vanishing at once and rage takes over, a blind one, directed to those who caused so much pain.

Luke Skywalker has been standing in the middle of the elder students huts for quite some time before he decides to enter Ben’s. He knows he shouldn’t intrude like this, but lately, he has seen in Ben too many signs, too many acts that reminds him of another Skywalker… the one they never speak about.

Ben’s breathing relaxes once rage takes over. With his anger, in his dream, he destroys those that caused the demise of so many. He does the right thing so that others will not suffer.

Luke comes closer and observes his nephew, laying on his side, soundly asleep. He has loved that boy as his own in the beginning. The son of his sister and of his closest friend. Born as the ashes of the Empire were still smoking.

A new hope.

A promise too easily gone. Luke has felt a dark hold over the boy at a very early stage, just as has Leia. They had hoped things would lessen with time. But they increased. At some point, Luke wondered how his father was when he was still a Jedi. Was the same darkness growing in his heart before his final demise ?

He tried questioning the force ghosts, and only Yoda and Obi-Wan answered the call to provide him with no definite answer. Luke was left with his worry, his doubts and more recently his fear.

He decides to do what he has always forbidden, for entering someone’s mind without their consent is for him an offense. But he has no choice. He sees what Ben is becoming day after day, he gets glimpses of his darkness through each and every training session, and Luke now needs to know how far it goes.

He extends his hand toward his nephew’s head and focuses his powers over him.

***

Kylo turns completely and looks toward his knights, once again once by one.

« Tarath Ren. Come forth. »

The designated knight of Ren leaves the circle and stands before his master, before bending a knee.

« You are my most trusted knight. You served me well until now. Will you serve me again through the challenge we are about to face ? »

The knight bows without any hesitation.

« Yes my lord. »

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

Chaos. Destruction. Murder. Rage. Screams. Fire… so much fire.

When Luke releases Ben’s mind, he is horrified by all he discovered. The dark hold that always hovered over this boy has now fully taken control. This is no longer the mind or the heart of his nephew. This is the face of a new monster. A New Vader that will destroy everything he cares about ! Leia, Han, the New Republic…

He ignites his lightsaber, in an act of mercy for the galaxy and as he is about to strike,  he realizes…

This is his nephew… his blood… the boy he carried proudly on his shoulders when he was 2, the one he took in his arms after a bad dream when he was 4… no…

Luke turns off the lightsaber, his eyes filling with tears of shame and regrets. He looks at his mechanical hand, a sore reminder of the darkness living in him…

He doesn’t have the time to think farther than this. Ben woke up with the buzzing sound of his lightsaber and is now seizing and igniting his. He sees the look in his nephew’s eyes and in them is written the full extent of his own failure with him.

He barely has the time to scream «  Ben ! No ! » before the hut crumbles over him and everything goes black.

***

Kylo keeps his eyes on his knight then bows his head.

« Stand and join my right side. » he says in a powerful tone.

Tarath Ren settles on Kylo’s designated side, in a perfectly straight stance.

« As for the four of you », the master of the knights of Ren says,  « I have been paying a close attention to your actions as of late. ».

His eyes travel from one to the other, still, the knights remain perfectly unmoving. « I know Snoke’s demise has temporarily unsettled some of you. »

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

Ben is panting as he holds his lightsaber in front of him, several of the eldest trainees coming at him. His eyes are widening in fear and he is like walking in yet another one of his nightmares. All of them are attacking him.

Some are accusing him of having done something to Master Skywalker who has yet to be found. They are so many, closing on him and he waves his lightsaber, because he knows that if his uncle came to end him, then they are all in the game !

Anger boils in him and replaces the intense fear he has been experiencing since he woke up. No ! No ! He will not go quietly ! If those self righteous Jedi are standing for the murder of those different from them, then they don’t deserve to live !

Ben suddenly finds himself engaging the elders in an uneven fight, except for one thing. He can use his rage to become stronger, and they will never dare using their contempt about him to do the same.

***

« Yet, the leadership is rightfully mine and Hux is merely an usurper. A tool Snoke was using to reach his goal, with no understanding of the force or of people like us. »

He pauses and keeps his eyes on the four, looking like he is pondering something.

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

There is chaos everywhere. Somehow, in the heat of the fight, the main building took fire, but Ben didn’t stop to wonder how this could have happened. He is exhausted and still fighting what seems like never ending legions.  They all came at him. All of them to slaughter him. He has been wounded several times and each time the pain renewed his resolve to live despite everything.

This time, the odds are really against him as one of the remaining elders comes at him with some powerful moves. Ben falls on his back as the Jedi raises his blade to kill him.

« So, this is how it has to end…»

Before he can finish that thought, a blue blade pierces the Jedi through the heart from behind then is being disengaged. The Jedi falls on his knees then on his side, and as Ben raises his eyes, he sees Kira, covered in soot, disheveled, panting and offering her hand.

« We must go ! Before Master Skywalker rises !» She can feel too that Luke is still alive. There is some desperation in her eyes and Ben understands he has to take over. He takes her hand and stands then lets her guide him as they run to the landing area on the hill.

***

« The journey that brought us here was long. Sometimes painful, but pain never scared us. What I wonder, then, is how, after all this time, one of you decided to betray me.»

Tarath Ren remained perfectly still in contrast with the four others who looked at one another from under their mask.

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

 

They reach the top of the hill in record time and Ben sees that five other figures are huddled near the biggest ship available, a small freighter Luke used to get supply for his academy.

Ben turns and looks down to see what is left of the academy. From the distance, the roaring fire seems even more impressive. Going up to the sky, it has swallowed the whole building and is now running toward the huts.

« There goes Skywalker’s dream… » Ben thinks.

« And there goes my life. » he adds, his face covered in soot and dirt turning blank.

A voice he knows well, and that has always been in the back of his mind creeps in and whispers in a soothing way. « It is all over now, Child. Find me. Join me, and you will understand what you are meant to be. »

Kira comes closer and puts a hand over his arm, the other one clutching her lightsaber tight. « We need to go. »

Ben looks down at her then turns and looks at the five other figures. He barely recognizes them. Some are newcomers, not as young as Kira but still not full grown, and two others are from his generation, but he never had much contact with them.

« You can trust them. » She says in a steady tone. « They are like us and they took down their share of those who attacked you. »

***

  « Tarath Ren. » Kylo said in a commanding tone.

The knight comes forth and stands next to his master the 4 others still aligned and being obviously unsettled by the revelation of a traitor among them.

Before they can form anymore thought, Kylo has ignited his lightsaber and stabbed in the chest the tallest knight right in front of him. He grabs him by the collar and forces him on his knees, keeping his eyes on his visor.

« Fool is the one thinking Hux would keep the knights of Ren if their new master would pledge allegiance to his power. »

Kylo disengage his blade and nods then steps back, looking at the fallen knight.

« Take him away and bury him with honors. »

Tarath Ren nods at the three remaining knights who quickly comply and leave the room with the body.

Kylo turns and joins the altar, setting his lightsaber over it.

« Remove your helmet. » he quietly says without looking at the remaining knight.

Quickly, he hears the sound of the discarded item falling on the floor. He turns and meets a very familiar set of green eyes, looking at him with confidence.

«He made one mistake when he relayed those coordinates to the Finalizer. He had no idea I had given each one of them a different set and that the one coming up through Hux’ database would reveal the traitor among us.»

Kylo nods without removing his eyes from Kira’s face. « I am going to share with you something no one knows. Something no one must know. This might be our only chance at survival.»

« This would not be the first time. » simply answers the young woman. « I pledged myself to you when I was thirteen, and will do it again for the rest of eternity if I have to. ».

Kylo holds her green gaze for a while then bows his head and looks at the handle of his lightsaber.

« Her name is Rey… »

* * *

 

 


	19. Desperate alliances

* * *

 

**Part 19 : Desperate alliances**

22 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

Rey flips the lightsaber and is pleased to see that at last, she got used to the weight change induced by all the building modifications. It has been a month since her weapon has been mended with Ben’s help.

That new shape definitely attracted a lot of unwanted attention through the whole base but Rey doesn’t really care. At some point, she found  an ancient text inside the sacred Jedi books about lightsaber building. Far from being a defect, this shape was an ancient one going as far back as the Great scourge of Malachor. She had read the full record on that battle, and had been at the same time amazed and chilled to the bones by its epic and yet terrifying outcome.

She knows she will eventually have to talk about those sacred texts  but for now, she doesn’t feel like it. This would mean embracing in full her destiny as a Jedi and she is still unsure about the path she is supposed to take. It would probably be easier with a master here to guide her but she has none, which means she has to deal with her doubts on her own.

She has many other concerns, though. Lately, alarming reports are reaching the resistance. The First order troops  are multiplying. Several neutral systems have been raided and either turned or destroyed. In the border, Leia’s allies are worried about the possibility of being exposed as rebels to the First Order’s government. Some are already defecting the resistance ranks and Rey doesn’t count anymore the missions where her and her friends had to go securing those fragile alliances.

She is set to leave again in a few hours, along with Poe and Finn, this time to make sure the alliance with the mandalorians still stands.

She lowers her lightsaber then turns it off before rolling her head in slow motion. She wishes the tension could leave her but it seems to be an hopeless dream. This has to be what happens when you are connected to someone you will eventually have to fight.

The last time she truly felt linked to Ben was a month ago. After this, there was nothing left but a terrible void. She several times tried to project herself toward him, without success. He is gone from her mind, from her life and there are moments she wonders if she hasn’t imagined it all.

She knows this isn’t the Force’s doing. She is certain this comes from him. Just as he was able to force the gates to reach her during the Arkanian ordeal, he is now locking them tightly, which is, for her, a very bad sign.

***

On the last count, they can gather on their side one third of the fleet and several outposts. Hux has secured the rest thanks to the stormtroopers forces and their conditioning.  For now, the general keeps the delusion up, but Supreme Leader Kylo Ren isn’t fooling himself. At some point, Hux will set things in motion, and then…

On board of the Subjugator, his eyes remain over the deep space.  He has sent three of his knights to secure a few more outposts but somehow, he knows that won’t be enough.

Tarath Ren enters the observation bridge and is not surprised to find the Supreme Leader alone. People tend to avoid him and his temper lately.

She removes her helmet and looks at him even if he doesn’t turn to meet her eyes.

« I received an encrypted transmission from Falleen. Tanoras Ren has taken down the governor after gaining proofs of his disloyalty toward you. The planet is now perfectly aligned with us and will relay the message to the others in its system. »

« It feels like a drop in the ocean. » Kylo bluntly states.

« Added drops make water streams. Water streams coming together make oceans. ».

« The countdown has already started. We don’t have enough time to reverse the tides. We need more allies. Fresh ones. »

«Or there is another option. »

He turns and looks at her, a clear image of focus and tension made as one.

«  We could use the resistance against Hux’ forces. We could find a way to point them toward the most rebelious outposts and wait for their destruction. » There is no illusion to maintain when it’s just them in the room, which is why she doesn’t lower her eyes.

« You want to use our enemies against part of our forces. »

« Il they are Hux’, they are no longer ours. » replies Tarath in a very steady voice.

« Doing this would imply feeding the resistance with datas without looking like it. »

« We just have to find the right ally able to swing between them and us, and having no problem taking side against Hux. »

« We don’t have anyone like that. »

Tarath Ren keeps her eyes locked over her Supreme Leader, a plan quickly forming in her mind. « Send me undercover. Appoint me governor of Falleen. I’ll hide my force sensitive status and I’ll play to the perfectly greedy bounty-hunter turned into a credit-thirsty leader. The resistance is desperately in need of allies. I’ll reach out toward them, as a revenge against what the First Order did to the planet. Then I’ll see how to feed them without attracting any unwanted interest.»

« I need you here. » he states in a firm voice.

« You need me more there. » She answers, holding his gaze in an almost defiant way.

***

One standard week later on board of the millenium Falcon

« Finn, you’re in there ? We received a transmission from Falleen. There has been a change into the the planet’s central government. A new governor has been appointed and she is willing to meet with us.»

Finn is sitting in the copilot seat of the falcon and presses a button, a soft smile appearing on his lips.

« Hey Rosie. Nice to hear your voice, babe. »

He can hear the young woman giggling on the other side of the communication system.

« Charmer. Nice to hear yours too. » Rose clears her throat then takes a more serious tone and Finn understands she is probably in the main command center, surrounded by officials.

« Allright, here is the situation. Up to now, Falleen was aligned with the First Order. However, due to the internal rift we are spotting everywhere, both sides have lost control over the most important facilities. The one in charge for now is a smuggler called Kira Sandeco, She proclamed herself governor of the planet and she wants to talk to us. »

« Allright, I am going to warn Rey and Poe. Send us the coordinates for Falleen and we’ll get there before heading home. »

« For the record, I miss you. » She says lowering her tone.

He can’t help but chuckling as he pictures her face and especially the adorable dimples on her cheeks. « Yeah, me too. I’ll be home soon. »

***

« Seriously, Rey, at times, it freaks people out. » Poe is sitting  near the Sabacc table, but his eyes don’t leave Rey’s form as she is levitating some tools, her forehead wrinkling in concentration.

« I know. » She answers in a flat tone.

« That’s exactly what I mean ! Is that all you can say about it ? » He waves his curly hair back and looks at her with an intensity that almost makes her feel uncomfortable.

She lowers the floating items and give him a side look. « What do you want me to say ? People are scared and I can’t do a thing about it. They are scared of force sensitive. »

« No, you’re wrong. It’s not force sensitivity that make them scared. » His gaze remains as intense as he adds «What happened on the Supremacy, Rey ? »

She immediately tenses. « Nothing of interest, beside Snoke being gone. »

« Yeah, about that… there is one thing people among us don’t get. You said you killed Snoke, and yet, Ren is still alive. Wasn’t he less powerful than his master ? » 

Rey slightly clenches her teeth. « What does that mean ? »

« Nothing… it’s just that it all sounds strange to us. »

« You weren’t there. » she says a bit coldly. Then she lowers her eyes and looks at her hands, just to notice that she holds them in fists. « He escaped before I could do anything. Then I had to run. I couldn’t take any chance.»

Poe’s face soften a little. « Rey, I didn’t mean you haven’t tried. You put yourself in the line and I respect that. Everybody does. Thing is, at times, you look very distant. You are our only Jedi Knight, and sometimes, we feel like you aren’t really here with us. »

She takes a soft breath and looks at him, her eyes displaying  too much of the lost feeling she holds in her. « I am not a Jedi Knight. Not yet and I can’t be sure I’ll be one someday. Doing this on my own… it’s hard. And I don’t understand half of what I feel most of the time. » Unless Ben is with me, she thinks and immediately feels guilty about it.

« You’re scared. » he states, nodding slowly.

« Terrified. » she whispers before lowering her eyes.

Terrified of never feeling him again…

* * *

 


	20. Wicked game

* * *

 

**Part 20 : wicked game**

23 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

Poe is the first to walks down the Falcon’s ramp and is not surprised to spot an eclectic group not too far from where the ship landed. His blaster at his side, he knows that in case of need, he will have but a few seconds to dive behind a nearby crate.

Rey comes next, with Finn right behind her. Her lightsaber is at her belt and her eyes are already scanning  the hangar. She is trying not to let Falleen’s acrid athmosphere get to her and like Poe, she assesses the group observing their progression as well as her options to get out of a potential threat, if need be.

Finn looks confident and nearly careless. He walks past Rey and looks around.

« We are supposed to meet a Kira Sandeco ? »

Poe notices that no humanoid female seems to be in the area and immediately think of a trap. When his hand is about to reach his blaster, he feels something freezing his move. It’s not a full control but more a subtle push making him reconsider.

Rey comes in the front and looks at the group of humanoids, some humans, some native falleens in all their green glory, and one she identifies as a zabrak. She nods at them then waits until the zabrak comes closer.

« My name is Yisher. Please, leave your weapons here. The governor is waiting for you.»

« Ah, that’s going to be a problem buddy. » says Finn as he joins Rey. « See, we have no guarantee you’re not meaning any harm, so… »

« It is required if you wish to meet the governor. »

Poe sighs. « Listen, can we do this without negociating in a smelly hangar ? We’ve come a long way, we’re tired, and frankly, I could use the bathroom right now.»

The falleens are already talking fast in their language and Finn clearly identifies their intentions as hostile.

Rey simply turns her head and looks at the Zabrak. She unclaps the lightsaber from her belt and hands it to him.

At the same moment, a young woman, a little under Rey’s size but with vibrant green eyes comes in view. She wears an old tech uniform and her obviously short brown hair is pulled in a half bun. She is 20, perhaps a bit younger than this, but in her eyes, Rey sees something reflecting her own life. That one too is a survivor.

« It’s allright. Keep your lightsaber, master Jedi. » the woman nods at the sabrak who falls back and joins his comrades.

Rey fastens back her lightsaber and nods. « Thank you. You must be Kira Sandeco ? »

 The young woman gives her a wicked smile and extends her hand. « That’s correct. Rey ? »

Rey shakes her hand and nods.

***

« As you can see, the whole facility has been deeply damaged. When the first order hit that area, I was just back from another special delivery and I saw them all struggle then fall. »

Kira is in front of a very dirty duraglass bay, looking at a desolate scenery in front of her.

« We didn’t understand, though. This planetary system has always been more or less left on its own. And then suddenly, there is that fleet above us and… » She waves at the remnants of what could have been a factory. She then turns and looks at her three guests.

« How did you become the governor ? » ask Poe, who is leaning on the chair he is sitting on.

« The whole line of command has been killed. I took the lead of the few forces we had left and… well, we launched our own raid. It was a desperate attempt, but strangely enough, it helped us hold on until another part of the First Order fleet emerged from hyperspace and did this. » She points at a crashed star destroyer in the distance and Rey can’t help but think about her scavenging days on Jakku, and how valuable this wreck could be.

« They chose me as their leader once it was said and done. Which brings me to why I contacted a friend of a friend of one of your friends in order to meet with the resistance. » Kira sits in her own chair and taps her fingers on the table.

« Well, you have us. » says Finn  who decided to remain standing.

« What can we do for you ? And how do we know you are not currently playing a double game with us ? » adds Poe, clearly used to those negociations, now.

« Well, for now, you only have my words which, I am certain, don’t mean much since we don’t know each other. How about, I give you a … » Kira hums a little and looks up then back at Poe with a half smile. « a proof of my good will ? »

« And what form would it take ? » asks Rey who is currently projecting the force all around her to try and feel anything unusual.

« Like I said, I am originally a smuggler. I have friends everywhere. Friends that owe me, big deal. If I can gather informations regarding some First Order’s facilities and some of the planets aligned with them, would this be proof enough ? »

Poe slightly wets his lips, one of his infamous half smile appearing in a flash. « And what would you ask for in return ? »

« In case of new attack coming from the First Order, the resistance will join us to protect our assets. This system has always kept its distances from all the interplanetary dramas and we would like for it to remain this way. »

«  I do have a question. » asks Finn as he looks straight at Kira.

The young woman nods.

« If your system always kept its distances, then why has the First Order attacked you in the first place ? » His eyes are piercing and Kira can tell that Finn is observing down to the smallest movements of her face.

She slightly shrugs. « As you are probably aware, the First Order is divided. Both sides are currently trying to gather as many outposts and workforce as possible in order to overpower the other. It appears that this place, dut to its central position in the mid rim, can be strategical. And you have certainly noticed the Falleens. They are a strong species, with  an ability to use pheromones to manipulate people. Imagine this put to good use in an army. »

Rey, who has been gazing out the window for the whole time turns her head and meets Kira’s gaze. « like Jedi do with their mind trick. »

Kira smiles and tilts her head. « You probably know this better than me. But perhaps, yes. Except that with falleens, manipulation occurs through desire, not forced control. »

« Interesting theory. » says Poe as he clears his throat. « Well, we will relay your offer to general Organa and we will contact you to give you our answer. »

« Very well. To prove that I am not lying, there is a Tie Fighter construction facility hidden behind the biggest moon of Ando.»

* * *

 


	21. a game of shadows

 

* * *

 

**Part 21 : a game of shadows**

24 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

The operation on Ando is a major success.

With some ground support from Kira Sandeco’s smuggler friends, the resistance manages to plant a few well placed bombs that terminate the Tie Fighter construction facility in a gigantic blast.

The celebration that comes next feels like the resistance’s true rebirth, as it is the first major operation and the first real success occuring since the disastrous evacuation of D’Qar.

That night, everyone join in, and Kira Sandeco officially becomes a resistance’s ally, to Poe Dameron’s greatest pleasure.

***

Kira waits to be in the old freighter that became part of her cover story to contact the Supreme Leader.

« My lord » she says, once the holographic panel is activated and she immediately sees a miniature projection of a standing Kylo Ren. Given his relaxed posture, she is certain he is alone in his quarters.

« The deal has been scealed. I succeeded in gaining their trust. The destruction of Ando’s facility gave me the credibility I needed to go past their doubts. »

Kylo Ren stiffly nods. « Are you certain the Jedi didn’t sense you ? »

« I think for now she ignores I am force sensitive. However, she is truly gifted. I can feel the force naturally flowing through her. »

« Remain careful, she is cunning. » Kylo says in a way he wish could sound cold, but where admiration seeps from each and every word.

« She is  nearly unlimited. She reminds me of y… »

« Tarath.» Kylo’s voice is commanding, and Kira instantly stop talking. « I know exactly how she is and I know that her potential is endless. You must keep your focus around her at all times. If you slip, we will not get another chance to feed the resistance with Hux’s datas. »

« I won’t fail you, my lord. » she replies with a nod.

«  I know you won’t. » His statement is clear, almost casual, but Kira knows how deeply charged those words are.

***

**6 years ago, Korriban, Outer Rim**

Korriban, sacred planet of the Sith order, despite its hostility, seems to be the only safe shelter for the group. Ben and his companions know that if anyone has survived Devaron’s events, they will never dare getting close to such a dark beacon, especially to hunt down six powerful force sensitive gone rogue.

As the eldest, Ben knows he should take responsability for the five others, but how could he, when his mind is going through so much turmoil ? Everything twists and turns in his head, in a way making him long for the horrible simplicity of the nightmares he had before.

Now, being awake is in itself a nightmare. His uncle, the very man he was supposed to trust with his life, has tried to kill him. What happened next is difficult to remember. The rage is the main thing that lingers but the acts themselves are like a blurs eluding his consciousness.

He killed so many students. First, out of fear, as he was attacked, then out of rage, because why would he be a target again ? Why would he be blamed ? Luke drew the weapon first ! He didn’t want to go to the academy in the first place.  All of this is ultimately his parents fault !

Force, how can he go back from what he has done ?

No ! why going back ? He was the one threatened in the first place ! The blame can never be his !

There are moments he looks at the wasteland surrounding them with no idea about the path they all need to take. Here they are, in a desolate place, in close proximity to some powerful Sith artifacts, three nearly fully trained jedi, two intermediates and a young one, who is, strangely enough, handling the situation best.

From the moment they boarded the ship, Kira took matters in her own hands in a subtle way. She knew Ben was in no condition to make decisions. She also knew everyone would rely on him better than on her since he is technically the strongest. She took upon herself to guide Ben, never crossing him, carefully navigating through the erratic fluctuations of his feelings, dodging his rage and anger, soothing his sorrow and offering support as she often had during their time in the temple.

Lately, she notices that he closes himself more and more as if he was trapped in his own mind. He whispers things she doesn’t get but that sound like half a conversation with an invisible person.

She knows he is diving even more into darkness. They all are, most likely because of the location. But for Ben, it goes deeper and she sees him day after day getting more desperate, turning colder. She feels a rift building between them, even if he was the only one she truly connected with in the temple.

Yet, she knows one thing. No matter how far he goes, and no matter how much he’ll sink, she’ll remain by his side because to her, he has become family, the light side being damned.

***

« We keep receiving supporting messages and offers from various areas from the middle and outer rims. What you all have accomplished on Ando has been the signal some needed to take a stand.»

Leia looks at the few people gathered around the conference area with pride. They have come a long way since Crait and their near extinction.

« Commander Dameron, I believe you have been in contact with Falleen, tonight ? »

Poe stands from his seat and nods. « Yes, General. Governor Sandeco provided us with two new locations she gathered through her own intel system. We are currently checking the datas in order to see how to exploit them. »

« What are those locations ? » Asks the general, a gleam of hope in her eyes.

« There is a stormtrooper training facility in the outer rim on Gamorr and a weapon factory in the expansion region on Cymoon 1. If Sandeco’s datas are correct, hitting those two large facilities should takes a serious toll on the First Order’s foundations. »

« General. » says Finn, his eyes intentely focused on Leia and the former princess nods at him to let him proceed. « About the stormtrooper training facility, we could perhaps try to see if some of the trainees in there are like me. If we could… I don’t know, make them turn or abandon the fight… »

« I understand your concern. » answers Leia. «  And I will give orders to spare as many lives as possible. However, understand this, Finn. We unfortunately are at war and we won’t be able to save everyone. That includes some of ours.»

Finn nods gravely, his hands flexing and relaxing several times. Leia makes sense, he knows it. But he is also certain there are many others like him. Can he morally stand there and do nothing ?

«  General, I’d like to take part of that raid. I know conditioning more than anyone here. I’ll be able to know if there are possibilities to save some of them. »

« Permission granted » answers Leia with a nod before turning toward Rey. « I believe you had something to tell us ? »

Rey nods then stands up, not feeling too comfortable in that kind of meeting. If she is near Poe, Finn and Rose, there are still a lot of people representing their allies, and the proximity of so many at the same time is a bit overwhelming. « As you know, I have been training a lot for the past few months. » she gave one special look to Leia then proceeded carefully as to not reveal Luke’s death. «  I need to go back to my master for a while in order to complete my training. ».

There are some murmurs in the room, and Rey knows how much people envy her right now. She is bound to meet with the legendary Jedi, the one who destroyed the emperor and who did so many great things for the galaxy. If only they knew…

Another Skywalker lie, thinks Leia, her face a perfect mask of honesty. « Of course. You may go as soon as you feel it is necessary. Do you want to leave with the Falcon ?»

Rey shakes her head. She will need complete privacy for her real mission. « An X-Wing will be fine. »

***

« At some point, we will have to tell them. » Rey’s voice is calm as she is adding some extra pieces of clothes in the bag she prepared earlier in the privacy of her room.

Sitting on the young woman’s bed, Leia looks up and sighs « I know. You are right. But I’d like to delay it a little more, just to make sure our alliances are strong enough to resist to the revelation. »

« Yes, but what if anyone among our original group slips and tells the truth ? Wouldn’t that make more damages ? »

« It would surely create a rift. » Leia looks at Rey with an intensity almost making the young woman uncomfortable. « Are you sure you need to go now ? »

Rey nods and secures her bag, her hand instinctively resting over it. Hidden under her clothes are her most precious possessions. The Jedi sacred texts that no one has seen yet, Ben’s sand colored cape, and her lightsaber. « I know it’s a bad timing. I understand that. But I am reaching a dead end, Leia. And that’s something we can’t afford. The First Order is going to retaliate and once it happens, we will need to be ready. All of us. »

« Where are you going to go ? » asks Leia, her voice a bit strained.

Rey looks hesitant because she is certain the revelation with bring back sorrow in the eyes of the woman in front of her. « I want to go to Dagobah.»

There it is. The sadness in Leia’s eyes. Rey hates herself for it.

« Oh. » replies the elder woman before composing her face again with a smile. «Luke always talked about that place with mixed feelings. It was according to him the muddiest planet in the whole galaxy, but he used to say that he had lived there a moment that had changed everything for him. »

« Did he tell you what ? » asked Rey as she was sitting next to the general. 

«  Oh no. » answers Leia with a laugh. « He told me those things years later and never shared much out of what I already told you. » She pats Rey hand in a gentle way. « He was a full fledged Jedi by then, which means he was stubbornly secretive, even for me who could at times access his feelings ! »

Rey blinks a little as her breath hitches. «  You could share feelings with him ? »

« Oh, only very strong ones. And even then, it was often him taking the lead. Which is probably better this way ! » Leia laughs again, her face conveying a strange mix of tenderness, regrets and grief. « He was such a sweet brother. So loving and gentle. And I was always in a rush. I always felt like I needed to do more, to go faster. I wish at times, I would have done things differently. »

« I am certain he understood. » replied the young jedi as softly as she could.

« Oh yes. Yes he did. He was like that. Very understanding and very loving. Damaged by the war too. He was never prepared for it. It changed him. He became graver. Yet a part of him remained that idealistic boy who was way too short for a stormtrooper.»

Rey laughs at the last statement, having heard the whole story from Chewie.

« You remind me of him. » Says Leia while grabbing the young woman’s hand in a fierce way. « You have his energy, his youth, his disregard for danger, and if sometimes it frightens me, I also know that this is what we need. We need you, Rey. »

Rey looks at their joined hands and instead of feeling moved by leia’s words, all she feel is the deepest form of shame she could experience.

« Make sure you comeback to us safely. »

Rey squeezes her hand then finally meets Leia’s eyes before nodding. « I promise, I will. »

***

As soon as she lands on Dagobah, Rey understands that this is not the place where she will get the  answers she needs. There is a beacon of darkness and a beacon of light, but unlike on Ahch-To, nothing calls to her.

She settles in Yoda’s abandoned hut to rest for the evening but has troubles finding enough peace in her in order to fall asleep. Slowly, her mind drifts from the war to other concerns, and soon enough, she ends up thinking about the one she is trying lately to forget.

Ben.

Where is Ben ?

Is he safe ?

Why is their bond so silent ?

Why is the force disconnecting them ?

Rey rubs her face with both hands then sits up, looking terribly frustrated. She grabs her lightsaber and gets out before igniting it. She hasn’t heard from him since the day they worked together on that weapon and to be honest, she is handling this less and less easily.

She grits her teeth and starts practicing, her eyes darkening by the minute. Maybe that he is severing the bond because he prepares something nasty for the resistance…

She flips her weapon above her head and lowers it fast as if she was slicing something in front of her. Maybe that he is now in full Supreme Leader mode. An unredeamable being…

She twists her lightsaber fast then starts moving at high speed, beads of sweat forming on her forehead. She will have to kill him, someday. There will be no other choice…

Rey suddenly screams in agony and hits a tree full force before disengaging the blade. She falls on her knees and shuts her eyes, her chest heaving and her whole body shaking.

She fails to feel the change of pressure in the athmosphere.

« Rey ? » Ben sounds at the same time in a hurry and completely shaken.

She turns her head and spots him in a sitting position, wearing a simple black tunic with matching pants and his hair slightly discheveled. She can read the disorientation on his face as he runs a hand in his dark mane to try and center himself.

« You are back. » She hates herself for her trembling voice, for this mark of weakness that she barely understands.

« Are you hurt ? It feels like you are. » His gaze is intense, almost piercing. How ironic. He looks like he could kill the one responsible for it. Except, the one responsible is his organisation.

She shakes her head and remains where she is, her eyes not leaving his face.

« It’s been weeks. » She says in an almost accusatory tone.

Ben looks frozen on his spot, unable to remove his eyes from her as he realizes that his attempt at locking the bond away to work on his agenda against Hux was a mistake. How can he function properly without being linked to her ?

« I know. » he pinches the bridge of his nose and shuts his eyes, hoping to relieve some of the tension building in his head.

« You were asleep. That’s how I got to you. You are pushing me away.» The underlying pain in her otherwise accusatory tone makes him drop his hand. He looks at her, knowing that he can’t lie to her, but feeling like the truth is way too cold for her to handle.

« We are at war, Rey. What other choice do I have ?».

A part of her is moved by the fact that this is an actual question. She can feel that. The other one is upset. He should know what other choice is being offered to him.

«  If only you could believe in me…» she starts, her tone still conveying an underlying note of accusation.

« I believe in you ! » He cuts, almost offended. « It’s the others I will not trust. »

« I wish at times you could be less infuriating ! You remain with the First Order and still, you don’t trust them ! »

« No, you are right. I don’t. »

She doesn’t lower her eyes and against her better judgement, her anger dissolves. 

« Why do you run from this ? »

He finds her voice surprisingly soft, after such a display of anger. How can he resist to her vulnerability, and at the same time, how can he accept it, when in others, he associates this with weakness ?

« Because you make everything more complicated.»

« You do this to me too. » She looks at the handle of her lightsaber and rubs a thumb over it. « I thought it would get easier. After a few days without hearing from you, I thought I would find my way through this. »

« I am not holding you back from the Jedi path, Rey. You are doing this on your own because deep down, you know that this is not who you are. »

She looks up at him, a flash of grief appearing there for half a second.

« I know what you want. » Ben sighs then shuts his eyes. « You think this will make you belong. You think this will define your place in all this. It won’t. » He looks back at her, honesty pouring from each word he is pronouncing. « I was 16 and already too damaged when they sent me to Luke to start my training. They were sure this was all I needed. Some Jedi teaching to become a good Jedi, end of the ordeal. It doesn’t happen this way. I already told you, being force sensitive doesn’t make you a Jedi, nor does it make you a Sith. It’s not even a question of choice unlike what they all think. You don’t choose to go dark. And you don’t go dark because it’s easier. Sometimes, it’s harder and a lot more painful than choosing the light. »

Ben leans forward a little as she moves on her knees, studying his face carefully, almost as if she was hypnotized. « You are who you are, Rey and I am what I am. I don’t fit within the First Order, not really. Just as you don’t fit within the resistance. And yet, we have a duty to accomplish. I want to bring order to the galaxy, and you want to stop the ways I am using to do so. Yet, we both essentially want the same thing. »

She slightly frown but doesn’t dare stop him because so far, everything he has said makes so much sense. « You want peace. You want the end of all suffering. You want balance. I want balance. I want to stop being torn apart. I want…» He swallows a little, his eyes filling with nearly the same desperate look he had when she closed the Falcon’s ramp in his face.

« I need… » He can’t go on and she whispers his name, as if to coax him to keep opening himself to her. She raises a hand to touch his cheek, but already, his form is disolving and her fingers feel the damp air of Dagobah instead of his skin.

She drops her hands, her chest tightening in a very painful way.

In the back of her mind, she hears a faint whisper but she knows this is him.

« We need each other. That’s the only truth we have to understand about us. »

* * *

 


	22. The visitors

* * *

 

Part 22 : The visitors

24 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

When she wakes up on Dagobah the next morning, her cheeks are marred with dried tears. She can’t remember if she has had a dream or a nightmare. All she can feel is the void in her chest that refuses to disapear.

Rey stretches in Yoda’s old hut and wonders what has possessed her to come here. She knows she is desperate to find answers, but the last words Ben whispered through their connection replay again and again in her mind.

She knows he is right. They need each other. No matter what happens with that war, no matter the side they are on, no matter the outcomes.

She stands and exits the small shelter, the humidity inside of the hut being nearly suffocating during daytime.

At first, she believes she is hallucinating when she spots a blue halo out of the corner of her eye. She slowly turns her head and meets the gaze of a middle aged man with long hair held back in a half ponytail, and sporting on his face a well trimmed beard. The man smiles at her and from the lines on his face, she can see that this is something he must have done a lot during his lifetime.

He holds his hands peacefully in front of him, over his jedi ceremonial outfit and slightly bows his head.

Rey opens her mouth, but the words remain blocked in her throat.

« You are not imagining this. » He says before turning his head to look at the forest. « This planet is a very strong beacon for the force. Even stronger than Ahch-to. It makes it easier to appear for you. »

« You know I have been on Ahch-To ? »

« I know a lot of things about your journey, Rey. » He smiles again and nods toward the hut. « I know you are searching for answers. Answers you can’t find in the tales everyone tell you about the Jedi. »

She moves to a nearby stone and sits, her legs nearly giving up. « I don’t know where to search. There is no one left to guide me. »

« No ? » He asks, sounding perhaps a little too surprised. « And here I thought you were in possession of the sacred texts. »

She laughs almost bitterly. « I can’t read them all. I get some of the things through the drawings, but really it’s not much. I think the language is lost.»

« It isn’t. Granted, it is very old and was only used by the scholars who wrote those records, but you can find help if you truly wish to decipher them. Some have been trained to study those books.»

She looks at him for a while and shakes her head « There are no survivors from Luke’s temple if this is what you are refering to. And Luke is gone as well. There isn’t a jedi left in the universe to help me read those texts.»

« And yet, someone is still able to read them. He was a gifted student. Way too quiet, but eager to learn. I always considered he was desperate to try and understand himself when no one else could. » 

It hits her like a ton of bricks. « Ben ? » she says, her voice trembling.

The man doesn’t answer, but in his compassionate look, she can see that she found the answer.

« But how can I ask for his help when we are on oposite sides ? »

« Are you ? » he states, his eyebrow slightly lifting.

Of course that we are !  She almost claims but as soon as the words form in her mind, she can see that they are a well crafted lie to give herself good conscience. Instinctively, she puts both hands over her face, the turmoil in her mind creating a revolution in her feelings.

« The line dividing darkness and light is a blur. A blur the Jedi order forgot to aknowledge at some point, which lead to a true tragedy. If the division remains, history will repeat itself. You have a chance to end it. With him.»

Rey’s hands drop and she looks at the man with a desperation that makes her look young and terribly vulnerable. «But I tried. I tried to make him come back and he didn’t follow. »

« Neither did you. Don’t you see why ?»

She feels the tears running down her cheeks, displaying a remnant of the pain she experienced when she understood Ben wouldn’t join her after all they had faced together. 

« He doesn’t have to come with you and you don’t have to go with him. »

« No ? Then how can we stop the divisions when he is Supreme Leader and when I am Resistance ? » She wipes her cheeks almost angrily but can’t prevent more tears from falling.

« You will know, once you are both ready. What is currently happening goes beyond the two of you. » says the man even more softly. « It has the potential to restore the balance and to make up for the prophecy that started all this ordeal. »

« What prophecy ? »

« An old tale I believed in. » he answers with a faraway look and a smile full of regrets. « It was a very long time ago. »

« I don’t even know if you are real. I am not supposed to be able to see force ghosts. I am not trained for this. »

« Ah ! And who told you this, Rey ? Is that common knowledge all through the galaxy ? » he says, laughing and holding his hands once more in front of him.

« I guess. » She honestly can’t tell him why she believes that, but now that she thinks about it, she has no true reason to agree with it.

« Well I am very much real, and force ghosts appear when the person they show themselves to is ready to welcome their knowledge. I have been watching you with a few of my… old friends and I know that you are more than ready to listen. »

« Will you come back ? » she asks, the ghost of the lonely child from Jakku never being far.

« Each time you’ll truly need me. » with that, he gives her an enigmatic smile and starts dissolving.

« Wait ! » she says, standing up, as if this could hold him back. « I don’t even know your name. »

« Qui-Gon Jinn. » he says, before vanishing completely.

***

Rey returns to the base the next day and the first thing hitting Leia is the intense sadness radiating from the young woman. She doesn’t dare asking what happened on Dagobah, but she is not surprised to see Rey locking herself away for the next few days.

The following night, in the loneliness of her quarters, she whispers her concerns to Luke. Her brother  doesn’t appear but she is certain he is listening, if anything, thanks to the wave of peace reaching her right before she falls asleep.

Someday, she will be reunited with him, and someday, she will see Han again.

But not for now.

This new generation is full of hope and energy, but they still need a guide, a beacon to push them in the right direction. Force knows what could happen if anyone was letting Dameron set in motion the crazy things he can plot in his mind! Force knows what would become of Rey if she isn’t there to remind her that the Jedi path isn’t a straight line from training to greatness. What she couldn’t do for her son… she will do at least for those two.

She knows she has to use the last of her strength to once again turn the tides and restore what should have never been broken.

Peace will only come after this.

***

26 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

  If the stormtroopers consistently cower away when the Supreme Leader is around, it’s because they know that when he is in a bad mood, there is no possibility to stop the amount of destruction he brings upon those that failed him. If their conditioning brings them to accept being put in deadly situations, around Kylo Ren their self preservation instinct remains in tact.

Even without any display of anger, the movements of his huge frame, the flexing of his fingers and the powerful strides he uses to reach his destination give him away. Lately, without his mask on, they get to see the fury in his eyes which can only mean one things. Someone will soon enough get retribution for whatever is angering him.

As he comes on the bridge of the Finalizer followed by two of his knights, Kylo Ren is already seething with rage. His eyes zeroes on general Hux,  and already, the people in the command center are starting to feel uneasy.

Hux turns, his hands held tight behind his back, and he gives a curt yet stiff nod toward the Supreme Leader. « My lord, had we been informed of your arrival beforehand, we could have welcomed you more appropriate accommodations. »  

« I can care less about a welcoming party or guards of honor, General, we are at war and it appears we are losing some very valuable positions probably as we speak. »

Hux stiffens even more, his eyes conveying a mix of anger and mild disbelief.

« I can see in your eyes that this is true. » says Kylo as he flexes his jaw. « Reports reaching the castle stated that we have lost so far a Tie Fighter Factory On Ando’s moon, a Stormtrooper training facility on Gamorr and a weapon factory on Cymoon 1. All of this in less than 2 weeks. I am starting to question your ability at leading our forces. »

The crimson color of Hux’ face for once doesn’t come from being forcechocked. He knew for the Tie Fighter’s factory. An unfortunate event with limited consequences. The two other locations, on the other hand, are crucial in the forces he is building. « There has to be a mistake, my lord. I got no informations regarding… »

Kylo doesn’t let him finish and motions to one of his knights to come closer. « Show the General the video feed gathered from the remains of the facility. Open a prioritary communication line with the other ships. I want our whole fleet informed of the situation.»

The knight nods and gets to the closest console before plugging the recording. An holographic projection instantly appears in the middle of the command center, clearly showing the stormtrooper facility being assaulted by the resistance.

Kylo remains silent for a while, taking in the changes of Hux’ face as he realizes that this massive failure is currently being displayed to all the high ranking officers of the First Order.

« It appears, General, that the handful of rebels you were supposed to crush under your boot after Crait is not as weak as what you believed. What a lack of judgement on your part. » Says Kylo icily.

« They must have had some outside help ! There is no way they could have made it back to the dire situation they were in in such a short time. » Hux’s forehead, now damp, is wrinkling as he lifts his eyebrow as high as he can.

« It is your job to foresee this kind of potential actions, General, just as it is your job to finally locate the resistance and bring me the information ! Since you seem to be unable to fullfill this mission on your own, starting tonight, you will be assisted by Kandar Ren. »

The designated knight bows at his master and comes closer, his hands at his sides. From behind his visor, he can see the extend of Hux’s cold rage and remembers the words pronounced by his master in the Upsilon class ship that brought them here. « You will be my eyes and my ears by Hux’s side. Use any mean necessary to remain alive for I am certain your presence will be less than welcome. »

 What an understatement…

* * *

 


	23. Reflexions

* * *

 

** Part 23 : reflexions **

6 years ago, Korriban, Outer Rim

Their rations are running low.

Ben is aware of the fact that soon, they will have to leave the shelter of Korriban to return to a more civilized world. He has been delaying this moment for days, in fear of becoming visible again through the force. And then, what would happen if his uncle could finally put his hands on him ?

He shakes his head and looks at his lightsaber, having noticed it’s erratic reactions. The blade is no longer smooth and buzzing. It’s sizzling and crackling in a very disturbing way. Somehow, in the middle of his battle for survival, something happened.

_« The deed split your soul, young Solo, for you cannot aknowledge yet the rightfulness of your actions. »_

The voice creeps in his mind once again and Ben can only roll his head and shuts his eyes to adjust to the feeling it creates in him. The tone in itself is gentle, almost carressing, but there is a creepy side to it, a sense of danger that, so far has, no fundation in anything tangible.

_« The lightsaber is an extension of you. As your soul splits, so does it’s core. »_

Ben swallows hard. He doesn’t want to hear anything about the events from the temple. He doesn’t want to remember the deaths, the destructions, or what the five others did in his wake. Yet he knows the voice never gives up. Resisting is futile. No one can tune out a voice displayed straight in your mind.

_« They sent you to your death, young Solo. They knew you would fail. They knew the signs and they knew that Skywalker would dispose of you, once placed in front of the evidences. For you are not a Jedi, Ben Solo. You are more. Much more. »_

Ben takes a hard breath and rubs his eyes with two fingers, trying to calm his anger. Flashes appear in his mind, showing his parents whispering about his outbursts. He hears the worry in Han’s voice, and the fear in Leia’s.

_« A force they cannot accept. A force they cannot control. A power, so strong, it could change the outcomes through the whole galaxy. »_

The images shift to his uncle’s frustrated moments in front of yet another slip through his training. « This is not the way, Ben ! ». His ways were never the right ones, it seems. But what were the right ones ? Disposing of students not fitting perfectly with the Jedi code ?

«  _They fear you because you have the potential to bring order to the galaxy in a way not even your mother can through her politics. »_

His mother and her constant need to put the Republic above everything else ! His mother and her everlasting duty as a senator ! Her and her buns ! Always saying goodbye because there are so many important things to do ! 16 years he has heard that song ! In 16 years, nothing has changed ! The duty remains all consuming and the rare moments she is back, she keeps complaining about corruption, the selfishness of her fellow politicians and her worry for the future of the galaxy. Her ways mean nothing !

 «  _I can feel your anger. Skywalker deems it wrong… He doesn’t want you to access to your true potential. He knows that through it, you will become more powerful than he ever can be. This is why he tried to kill you… He knows he is the past and that you are the future. »_

Ben grips the lightsaber tight, his breathing becoming ragged.

«  _You need to let it express itself through your whole being, young Solo. This is the only way to become what you are meant to be. »_ The voice becomes even more endearing and yet, there is something almost challenging underlying each word…

Ben grits his teeth, his hold on the lightsaber whitening his knuckles.

 «  _Controlling your emotions is for the weaks ! »_ suddenly bellows the voice, and dozens of fast images replay in Ben’s mind, showing him his father in the process of telling him to get a grip, because this is what smugglers do in order to survive.

«  _Unleash your true power ! Choose your destiny ! »_

_Ben’s hand starts shaking, his breathing being nearly out of control, stones being lifted everywhere around him._

_« RISE, CHILD ! »_ The voice commands, and Ben feels his body covering in cold sweat, as his mind feels like it’s being carved with a drill.

He screams and instinctively turns his lightsaber on as he jumps on his feet. What feels like millions of fast images replay in front of his eyes : Leia fearing him, leia going away, Han leaving for his smuggling tours or to train new pilots instead of staying akwardly with is son, the droids taking care of him, often exploding because of his anger, the nightmares every night, disregarded as natural nocturnal fears, his uncle and his quiet attitude, his fake attachment to him… that liar … THAT LIAR ! HIS UNCLE IGNITING THE LIGHTSABER AND TRYING TO KILL HIM IN THE HUT !

With some incredibly fast moves, Ben fight the ghosts of his past around him. He slices his treacherous mother’s friends in half. He destroys the inside of the Falcon with all he has, and he screams, he yells, he breaks his voice as he stabs again, and again and again Luke in the heart !

The lightsaber emits a loud crack and its blade turns blood red before the power goes off.

Ben falls on his knees and looks at the smoking broken weapon in his hands, unaware of the angry tears running down his cheeks.

The voice once again become carressing. « _You are not lost, child, you are found. I will wait for you on the second moon of Telerath. I will make of you the first of a new order of knights, for the Jedi ways are now gone. You will be the master of the knights of Ren, and your companions will be your followers. Come to me… Kylo Ren. »_

***

 

26 standard weeks after Crait’s events

 

Ben is in his private quarters on board of the Subjugator when he feels the pull through the force. He turns, just in time to watch Rey appear in a corner. She stands from her meditation position and simply takes in his apparent relaxed features.

« You were meditating too. »

Ben stands and nods before looking around. He takes a silent breath to try and quiet the chaos created by the memories.

« I initiated it. » she says before he can ask her why they are connecting at this particular moment. « I wanted to see you. »

He looks back at her and stops for a second to ponder the irony of the situation. Everything always happen in his mind. With Snoke, with her, but where does he really stand ?

She mistakes his silence for some disapointment and immediately lowers her gaze. He nods then goes to his bed and sits, his hands joining on his lap.

« You let me in, this time, didn’t you ? » She says in a slightly hopeful voice.

« There is no sense in trying to block you out of my mind, Rey. Regardeless of our position in that war game, we are still sharing something that can’t be avoided. ». His voice is surprisingly calm. No… he isn’t disapointed. There is something else…

Rey sits on the floor and keeps her eyes locked over his face.

« I don’t want to keep you out. » he adds, his tone a little softer.

« Neither do I. » she answers while twisting her fingers.  

He barely nods and looks at the starfield through the duraglass.

«  Are you safe ? » she starts, her forehead creasing a little as if she couldn’t believe what she has just asked.

He chuckles almost bitterly and runs a hand through is hair. « Safe is a concept I forgot a long time ago. »

« No, I mean… I know about the division and the… » She looks like she is walking on eggs. Can she talk about the current situation within the First Order without sounding like she is fishing for information ?

« Hux isn’t quite ready to dispose of me yet, if this is what you are wondering. » he replies without giving her the time to dig her hole deeper than it already is.

He looks back at her and sighs after a bit. « And you, are you safe ? » there is some genuine concern in his eyes and if she feels like lying to him, it dissolves instantly.

« I don’t know. I mean, yes, I am safe. » she starts in a strained voice.

« But you aren’t fine. » he finishes before she can find the words and she shakes her head because any answer she could give would be too far from the truth.

« Rey, what is it ? » he insists, his hands unlocking as he watches intentely the display of emotion on her face.

« I’m not sure I can do this anymore, Ben. The more I dig and the more I try to understand the force, the more it slips through my fingers. All I know, all they tell me isn’t consistent with what I am experiencing. » she explains, her voice conveying a bit of fear.

He nods, but before he can say something, she speaks again, so fast that it sounds almost like she is letting a huge weight off her chest. «  But what I am experiencing is consistent with what you told me. »

He slowly stand from his spot and in his face, she can see the same display of emotion from the throne room when he pleaded with her to follow him.

« I’m scared and I don’t know what I have to do. » she says, standing as well. « But whatever I do, I know it has to be with you. Will you help me ?»

He takes a few steps closer, almost afraid to see any treacherous sign on her face. When he sees that there is none and that her eyes only display innocence and honesty, he bows his head. « What do you need ? » he asks, standing only a few feet away from her.

« Help me understand. Show me what I am. » she pleads, her voice trembling. « I have… » She takes a hard breath at the idea of revealing to him something she hasn’t even said to her friends. « I have the sacred books. I saved them from destruction, but I can’t read them. »

He remains silent as he watches the emotions playing on her face. How he wishes he could erase the bad ones only to keep the good…

« Do you think we could meet somewhere ? Once again ? I could bring them and…»

« Yes. » he answers, a bit too fast. « Odessen… We go to Odessen. We will meet on orbit and land together as there are no facilities there to shelter us.»

« Ok. » she whispers and with the relief of knowing that she will get to see him again comes the exhaustion of the past few days.

His eyes soften in a way that looks almost impossible for someone so prone to anger outbursts. « You look like someone who need to rest. » He states as he eyes travel all over her face.

« I can’t. » Her eyes fill with tears as she feels the connection becoming loose.

« I know. » he nearly whispers. « I feel it too. ».

He raises a hand between them and at the same time, she does the exact same thing. « In three days ? » He adds as their palms get closer. His eyes lock with hers and he feels that it gives her the strength not to let the tears fall.

« In three days. » She answers, their fingers becoming dangerously close.

« You know that someday… » He starts.

«Yes… We will be one. » She finishes.

It is only a soft brush of their fingertips before the connection shuts down.

But it is also so much more… a glimpse of what may come… a fragile light of hope and enough strength to make them go on for the next three days.

 

***

 

The next communication with Falleen is planned  for the next night but Poe Dameron can’t stop fidgeting in his seat, like a child unable to wait to open a present. Leia walks past him in the command center and rolls her eyes.

« Commander Dameron, have you never been taught that patience is a virtue ? »

Poe cracks one of his infamous smile at the general and leans lazily over his chair. « I have been taught patience is a virtue in things like diplomacy and planning. And I am a pilot, so… »

« A pig headed one, I might add ! » she says as she takes a seat not too far from him. She can’t help it, she gives him that motherly smile that is also all forgiving. « Now tell me. Why are you litterally bouncing off your seat in front of that communication console ? I don’t recall one of our teams being out. »

He sighs and shakes his head. « I was kind of hoping we would get news from Falleen soon. We need some action. »

« You younglings don’t know how to enjoy peace while it lasts. » She muses, her fingers slightly taping the console’s surface.

« What can I say, general ? I have to live up to my reputation ! »

She laughs with all her heart at that comment. That boy can get on her nerves so easily and yet, he really wormed his way into her old heart. « You are impossible. »

« You probably were too, in your time. »

She lifts her eyebrow and gives him a pointed look. « I was worse. That’s why I’m the general. » 

« I’m sure you were. I’ve heard the tales !» he says, his grin being impossibly infectious.

« I was also very perceptive… » Leia adds as she stops tapping her fingers. « And you are not waiting for action. You are waiting for a message from a certain green eyed governor who is feeding us with valuable intel. » She leans back in her seat, looking visibly amused.

He wrinkles his nose then laughs. « Maybe a little. »

 « Build bridges. It’s a good thing. » She pats his hand then stands and heads toward the exit.

He straightens up on his seat and looks at her, losing a bit of his attitude. « Leia. »

She turns and looks at him with all the compassion she can offer. « There is no point in facing all we do if it’s not to think about what could happen after. I saw my brother build a lonely life because he couldn’t see past his duty. I sacrificed too much in the line of duty and it cost me a great deal. You children need to live despite the war and the chaos around us. Don’t make the same mistakes we made. ».

It takes him 3 full minutes to move after she has left the room. Most of the crew on base see her as a sort of semi-goddess with unlimited potential for the fight. History remembers her, her husband and her brother as heros who defeated the Empire.

Maybe that they were actual people with only one wish… to find peace and their place in the universe ?

After a while, he leans over the console and contacts Falleen.

* * *

 


	24. Connections

* * *

 

**Part 24 : Connections**

Snoke’s castle, Mustafar, 6 years ago.

 

 

Ben’s eyes are set on the holographic recording of an old session from the galactic senate, but it is unclear if he actually understands what is being said. All that Kira reads on his face is… the void.

This was offered as a gift by the lord of the castle, but Daine wonders if it is truly one. Many time he has questioned their reason of being here, his concern always dismissed by the same answer coming from Ben : « And where do you want us to go ? ».

He is only 15 and what happened on the temple is something he doesn’t understand nor does he truly agree with. Yet, he participated in that particular event, and he killed his share of padawans, making his kyber crystal bleed in the process.

All he knows is that when it was time to make a stand, he had chosen Ben. Not because it was easier… it would have been far more easy to either follow the others or to hide in the woods. He had chosen Ben because he had seen in him something familiar. Something he was tired of hiding, in fear of being branded by the others as a failure.

The destruction and deaths that followed were unfortunate… but no one truly gave them a choice. Not to Ben, not to Kira, not to Jelan, Adara, Nervan, Graith and not to him.

The holographic feed replays for the fifth time, and Daine can’t take it anymore. He stands and turns it off, only to see his ice blue eyes met by a set of very dark  and angry eyes.

In the same motion, Ben stands and throws the table away. He can’t tunes out in his head the revelation made by this filthy politician, Ransolm, about his mother’s lineage and he can’t remove from his mind Leia’s reaction to it. All along. All along she knew, and she never said a thing ! And Skywalker ! That Traitor ! He had to know too !

Ben takes his head in his hands, his breath coming out ragged. What kind of family does he come from ? With the son murdering the father, the daughter refusing to aknowledge her origins… All of that because of a division between darkness and light ?

«  _You come from a family of corrupted people that couldn’t see what their most noble member could see._ » The voice is here again… Snoke… carressing as ever, in moments like this.

«  _Unlike them, you are born with the instinct. Unlike them, you are born with the vision of what needs to be done, much like you grandfather before you._  »

Daine steps closer but the coldness he sees in Ben’s eyes stops him dead in his track. It is something ferocious, nearly primal. There is a shift there, and he isn’t sure this is a good one. No, in fact he is sure this is all wrong, because Kira is on her feet and she has that particular set of eyes turned toward their leader.

« Ben, you need to calm down. » She says, jolting her chin up.

« Ben is gone. » He replies with force. Then he turns toward the fallen table and looks at the broken holographic device with determination. « He never existed in the first place. His whole life was a lie carefully crafted by people who cared more about their aura than about the truth about themselves. From this moment, my name is Kylo Ren. »

«  _Learn who you are, Kylo Ren. Discover the true power and the true vision Vader had. Not what the destroyers of the empire recorded to make him look like a monster. Walk in his footsteps, and you shall see… you shall see the beauty of the vision he had for the galaxy._ »

The voice in his head becomes more pressing and he knows this last message was less of a suggestion and more like a command. He turns and looks at the two companions in the room with him. It is time to stop running.  Time to stop waiting. « We are dead in the temple and reborn here. All of us. You must shed your past identity as I disposed of mine. Then together, we will go on a quest.»

« What quest ? » asks Kira because she is probably the only one left able to question him without inducing a fit of rage.

« A quest to find Vader. » he answers, and already she sees that this will become his obsession.

 

***

 

Resistance base

26 weeks after Crait’s battle.

2 days before Odessen

 

 

« Hey Poe ! » Finn sprints into the hangar and straight to Dameron’s designated X-Wing, just to find his friend tampering with one of the panel on the side of the ship.

The pilot raises his head and waves a lock away from his slightly sweating forehead, only to smudge some grease over his skin. « Yeah ? »

« We’ve got a transmission from Falleen. Sandeco finally came back and she gave us another strategic location with some potential. Leia is calling a meeting to see what can be done about it. »

Poe slams the panel shut and bites his lower lip in appreciation before grinning. « That woman is brilliant. » he looks at BB-8 and nods at the droid  rolling around his feet. « Let’s go buddy. »

He then wraps an arm tightly around Finn’s neck and heads out of the hangar at a fast pace. « Finn, my man, I’ve got a really good feeling about this. »

Finn can’t help but chuckle as he walks with his friend. « You’ve got a good feeling about her, you mean. »

« That too ! You have to admit that she has some interesting green eyes. » he muses as he walks past several resistance members to go to the control room.

« I didn’t really pay attention that one time I saw her. » answers Finn with honesty.

« Ah ! Right. That had to be expected with sweet Rose in your mind. » He gives a huge grin to his friend and Finn rolls his eyes as they both enter the control room.

In there, the athmosphere is considerably less cheery and Poe immediately releases his friend to adopt the same attitude as all the members of that meeting.

Leia is sitting around the table along with Rey, Rose, Tash Mereel, a few of his allies, and from the look of it, the athmosphere is tense.    

« We believe that taking control of this mining facility could be a good thing on the long run. » says Leia as she looks straight at her Husband’s old time friend. « Tash, I know it sounds crazy, but taking this and operating it for us will not only cut a important source of metal supply for the first order, but it will also provide credits that we could redirect for our immediate needs. »

« You can’t improvise yourself as a miners, Leia. » Answers Tash as he shakes his head. « Do you realize how many defenses are set to protect this facility ? There is a star destroyer stationned right above it, several massive canons, probably a good number of Tie-Fighters  along with a massive amount of stormtroopers. »

« Yes, but our contact provided us with a back door. If we can infiltrate the whole station, then we’ll be able to redirect the canons to fire at the star destroyer. There won’t be any retaliation, as firing to toward the facility would put it in peril and they certainly don’t want that. They will send ground troups and with the right plan… we’ll be able to wipe them out.»

« What kind of right plan ? » asks the mandalorian settled next to Tash, his eyes fixed toward Rey.

The young woman doesn’t move and doesn’t meet anyone’s eyes. Her face is blank  as she looks at the holographic projection appearing in front of them.

« This is the part I’d wish to define with you next. » Answers Leia patiently.

« Isn’t that something Master Skywalker should have a part in, given the importance of the mission and the amount of odds against us ? » He insists, his eyes not moving from Rey.

The old general slightly clenches her teeth but before she can say something, Rey stands and looks straight at the mandalorian. « Master Skywalker is currently gathering some very important artifacts that we know to be crucial for the destruction of the first order. This quest has to be his and his alone, as it requests his deep knowledge to locate what has been hidden for hundreds of cycles. We can’t disrupt it and take the risk of having him miss something for a mission we can perfectly fulfill on our own. »

Tash Mereel raises a hand to stop the mandalorian before another word is pronounced then bows his head at Rey. « I am certain it wasn’t my friend’s intention to imply that Master Skywalker is running from his duty. His reasons for those quests are his own and we can only trust his choices in regard of all he has already done for the good of this galaxy. »

_Yeah… like trying to kill Ben_ … whispers harshly in her mind the selfish side of Rey.

 Her eyes harden a little, and they all mistake her reaction for a fierce need to defend her supposed mentor.

« If you believe this mission has to be led on the ground by a Jedi, fine, I will do it on behalf of my master. »

The mandalorian nods and seems to relax in his chair.

_They put too much faith in the Jedi ways_ , thinks Rey as she sits back on her chair.

Leia gently settle a hand over hers then bows her head. « Rey will lead the infiltration team. Commander Dameron, you’ll be on standbye and you’ll be the squadron leader, ready to support the ground team. »

« Understood, general. » Quickly answers Poe with a nod.

« I’d like for you to go to Falleen in order to meet with the reconnaissance team and see if you can gather more valuable information about the facility. I trust the governor will arrange such a meeting with ease.»

« Very well. » he answers, perfectly concealing his excitement at having an excuse to go there.

Leia turns back toward Tash and immediately, the man knows he is in troubles. When Leia Organa Solo has this look, it only means one thing… she is going to ask for something huge and no one will be allowed to say no.

« Allright, ask. » he simply says, holding back a groan. Han would have adored this situation.

« You are right, we are no miners. We are the resistance. I want you to recruit people to operate the facility on our behalf. People we can trust with our life. »

This time, he doesn’t hold back the groan…

***

Guest quarters from the Finalizer

26 weeks after Crait’s battle.

2 days before Odessen

 

 

Kandar Ren locks the door of his quarters then extends his hand toward a corner of the ceiling, a cracking sound being heard and a small recording device falling on the floor. He crosses the space in no time and crushes the small camera under his boot for good measure.

Will Hux ever learn that no one can fool a force user with some meager tricks like this ? Or is he that confident to be superior with his military ways ? Stupid mutt, thinks Kandar before removing his gloves and tossing them away.

He then proceeds to press the button of his helmet and removes the heavy piece of armor from his head, only to reveal a handsome and yet deeply scarred face on the right side. He waves a hand in his long blonde locks, the ice blue color of his eyes falling over a stain on the cover of his bunk.

Stupid mutt indeed, he thinks as he turns on his lightsaber and slowly lifts the cover with the force. There, on the matress, is a venimous kouhun. Before the multi-legged arthropod can race to him to bite him, he has already swung his lightsaber and cut the beast in halfs.

He shakes his head and turns off his lightsaber before activating the portable holo device he carries with him everywhere.

Kylo Ren immediately appears, and Kandar bows his head. « My Lord.»

The supreme leader nods. «  Any valuable news from the Finalizer ? »

« Yes my lord. Despite his attempts at trying to conceal things, I found a set of interesting informations coming from the private database of General Hux. »

« You accessed his private database ? » says Kylo with caution and Kandar can’t help the smirk forming on his face.

« Not the decoy private database they implemented in the system to fool me. ».

A matching smirk forms over Kylo’s lips and Kandar sees his form lean back a little. The Supreme Leader is probably sitting somewhere and by the look of it, he is slightly relaxing.

« I will transfer the datas through our secure feed in a moment. » says Kandar as he sits on a chair, away from the remnants of the beast planted there to kill him.

« Have you tried accessing General Hux’s mind ? ».

« Consistently, yes. I simply brushed the surface to make sure he couldn’t feel a thing. He is very confident in his plan.  He is certain you will be taken down in a near future. »  

« How many of our forces are involved in the coup ? » asks Kylo as if he was talking about something trivial.

« From the look of it, I would say 60%  of our forces. Mostly among the youngest officers. The elders who faced several conflicts before this one deem him irresponsible and incompetent. Some are accusing him of being the main reason behind the loss of the Supremacy and the failure to wipe out the resistance after D’Qar. »

Kylo nods and joins his hands in front of his mouth, his forehead wrinkling a little as he thinks. « He can fool the inexperimented. I am thinking we should remind the eldests that Hux took over after plotting the assassination of his own father. Brendol Hux was well respected by those who remained faithful to the Empire. He was the one behind the stormtrooper program. If we expose his son as the man who is spoiling the First Order’s chances to rule over the galaxy, that will fuel the fire against him. I am certain that some of the youngest officers would hesitate to make a stand against a few key members among the old guard. »

« Hux is planning on meeting with some of those eldest officers over the next few days. He will certainly try to convince them to side him. I will follow him and brush those officers’ mind to see if I can help them remember some key factors. »

Kylo nods and rubs his forehead. «I need you to make sure he is blind about my whereabouts  for the next 4 days. »

« That can easily be done, my lord. » answers Kandar with an eyebrow lifted.

Kylo can’t help it, he slightly chuckles and rubs his forehead. « You are enjoying this mission. »

« If you remove the murder attempts, the poisoning attempts and the pathetic spying attempts, I have to admit, getting on his nerves is more than pleasant. »

Kylo instantly reverts to his serious attitude.

« Don’t push your luck. Hux may be an idiot, he still can do some damages. If you feel your situation is too deeply compromised, come back to the castle. »

Kandar takes his time then nods right before Kylo cuts the communication.

***

That night, the connection opens on its own, without any of them trying to activate it.

She is sitting on her bed, her legs against her and looking at nothing in particular.

He is leaning against the duraglass bay in his castle room and he is watching the dark sky.

They are both aware of the other’s presence, but neither move for now.

« You are tense. » He says almost as if he was talking to himself.

« So are you.» She replies, her fingers slightly gripping her knees.

« Should I ask you why ? » He adds, his eyes following the track of what looks like a shooting star… It’s probably less poetic… Merely a piece of broken vessel entering athmosphere. The Empire, The Republic, the First Order, the Resistance, all of them left in their wake oceans of debris, like giant cemetaries orbiting around hundreds of innocent planets.

« Should I do the same ? » Her tone is perhaps a bit high pitched which makes him turn his head to look at her. She looks like someone about to break. This simple realisation tears him apart. What are they doing to her to put her in that state ?

  She merely chuckle, but he knows this is a desperate attempt at finding a decoy for her constricting chest. « Things could have been different, you know ? Had you just… tried to understand ! »

One of her hand is bawled in a fist and she hits it on the bed before looking at him, her eyes burning. « But you refused to see reason ! All that for what ? For power ? For your twisted vision of order ? »

He looks back through the duraglass and puts his forehead against it, his face a perfect mask. « I could tell you the same thing, Rey. You refused to see reason and you are now stuck in a predicament that is slowly eating you away. »

« You don’t know that ! » She says, jumping on her feet, her teeth bared.

« I know exactly what it is ! » He retorts, turning and narrowing his eyes at her before slightly lowering his head. « All you live I have lived before you. Where you stumble, I stumbled. The sense of failure you get is something I already experienced. » His tone is carressing, enticing, mirroring one of their very first connection when he whispered to her… _you do… Ahhh… you do…_

Her anger deflates, somehow… She doesn’t know if it is his tone, the intensity of his gaze, or the truth behind his words. She knows he doesn’t lie to her. He won’t. He can’t.

« I know that you feel like you are losing yourself. » He adds even more softly. « That too I have felt. Along with the sense of being lonely in this fight, except that you aren’t. »

He takes a step closer, the twist in his soul matching the desperate look in her eyes.

« I’m with you.» He says once he is close enough, to the point he is looking down and she has to raise her chin to look up at him.

« Are you ?  Will you be, the next time we meet on the battlefield ?». This is where he gets it. She knows that each time she fights with the resistance, she potentially fights against him and it tears her apart.

« This has nothing to do with the war. This is the will of the force.» He cuts, his voice holding a certainty she doesn’t have the strength to contradict even if it brings her no comfort.

 « It would have made everything easier if you had accepted… » she tentatively says as the connection slowly loosens.

« Or if you had.» He replies, the ghost of a sad smile on his lips.

 « I had seen your future. » That last part comes out as a soft plea as she sees his form dissolve in front of her.

She isn’t sure she hasn’t imagined it but it seems to her that right before he vanishes, he raises his hand near her face as her mind registers the faint echo of a sentence she doesn’t dare believing :

 « You are my future. »

* * *

 


	25. Intents

* * *

 

Chapter 25 : intents

 

**26 weeks after Crait’s battle.**

**1 day before Odessen**

Deep breath in…

Deep breath out…

She feels every living being around the base. The team on guard duty. the wild life.

She can almost feel the wind running through the leaves. No… that’s it… she feels it now.

Farther in the mountains, some boulders just detached from the ground and are currently rolling, destined to fall in the small river slithering in the valley. The pearl fishes swimming bellow will only have half a second to save their life.

Too late… one of them is caught… its life flickers, and it passes on the other side. Death feeds life… the small micro-organisms are already operating to transform its flesh.

Deep breath in…

Deep Breath out…

The Force is in her, like a beacon warming her, powering her.

Further away, on orbit, sensors are quietly flying, waiting for signs of any incoming hostile ship.

She will know the ships are here before them. She will feel their vibration and the vibrations of thousands of troops being on board before those devices pick up the datas and send them to the base.

Deep breath in…

Deep Breath out…

She explores, farther in space. It is at the same time cold and scorching because of the radiations. There is not much sustaining the force there, but it still freely flows through.

Millions of paths are open in front of her, but she can’t see which one leads to him. She tries, harder this time, but he isn’t within her reach.

Deep breath in…

Deep breath out…

She lays on her bed, folding her hands over her stomach as her eyes pop open.

The bond is channelling his mental agitation, but the connection is one sided this time and she can’t fully reach him to bring him the relief he probably needs.

She tries calling his name. Once. Twice… but the doors remain shut and she can feel that the block doesn’t come from him.

She must be patient and keep her mind centered. There is only one day left and then …

They will be in Odessen.

 

***

« Your lack of explanation on yet another failure on your account is disturbing, General. » Supreme Leader Kylo Ren is pacing in his throne room, his hands folded behind his back. If his stature is quite impressive, it is the venom in his voice that makes the officers on the bridge of the Finalizer nearly squirm.

Some of them are thankful to be stationed millions of lightyears away from the palace on Mustafar and yet, a worry creeps and crawls in their head. Is the new Supreme Leader able to force choke people from a distance ?

Hux is observing the holographic version of his master with his usual stiff attitude. « There has to be a traitor among our ranks. The last facility the resistance has taken down was in an uncharted area of the unknown regions. The surgical attack led by the rebels proves they were very accurately informed. »

« A traitor. Among us. How do you plan to identify that person ?» Kylo Ren’s lips tighten in a way Kandar Ren knows well. Yet he is more focused on observing Hux’ reactions from behind his helmet’s visor.

« The stormtroopers will all report to their division for inspection. The officers will answer to me and me alone. »

« Enough of your incompetence, General ! » Hux slightly flinches as if he had been slapped in the face.

 « Kandar Ren. » The knight of  Ren comes closer to the holographic projection and kneels on one knee. 

« My lord. » he answers, his head slightly bowed.

« You will personally lead the interrogation of each officer with credentials allowing them to access sensible datas. »

Hux’s face instantly turns crimson and before he knows it, he is stepping forward and spits with force. « My lord, this is outrageous ! This is military concern and… »

« You are forgetting yourself, General. » Hisses Kylo as he glares straight at Hux’s video feed. « I am the Supreme Leader of the First Order and you as well as your men are under my command. You will obey my orders at once, or… »

Kandar Ren instantly stands and turns to look at Hux, his lightsaber in his hand.

 « I’ll have you removed from your position. Do I make myself clear ? »

Hux turns his gaze toward Kandar Ren, and from the frequency of his breath intakes, the knight can tell the general is being consumed at the same time by rage and fear. He can’t help it. He turns on his lightsaber and is delighted to be rewarded by a quick and yet distinctive jerk from Hux’ shoulders.

Hux then clears his throat and looks back at Kylo’s video feed then nods even more stiffly than before. « Yes Supreme Leader. »

« Kandar Ren ? You may proceed. » Kylo Ren then turns off the communication system and walks up the dais to sit on his throne.

 _Undermining Hux’ authority in front of his men is one thing_ , he ponders, _yet, the seeds of betrayal are implanted everywhere right in the military core of the first order._

His eyes wander all around him and stop from time to time over the statues displayed against the high pilars. _All warriors. All destroyers… can anyone reign only by force ?_

Somehow, this simple statement disturbs him. War is a mean to an end. But war, isn’t the end, right ? except… for people like Hux.  Except for the militaries whose life is entirely turned toward this.

 _One cannot reign through the militaries_. The statement is clear and forms in his mind with an ease he wouldn’t have expected. _The First Order is then… not the way._

He rubs his eyes with two fingers, glad to be alone in that large and heavily charged room. _But what is the way, then ?_

***

**3 hours before Odessen**

« You are leaving again. »

Finn voice startles her, but she doesn’t exactly know why. It’s not like he is catching her doing something forbidden, since her trip has been approved by Leia herself. Well… they don’t exactly know what this trip is about, nor do they suspect her real destination, or the fact that the sacred books are safely hidden in the X-Wing she is currently preparing… Still, she has been cleared for departure.

« I won’t be away for long. There is something I need to understand and the key to that is in the outer rim. » She closes the side panel of her ship and wipes her hands to clear them from most of the grease.

The former stormtrooper nods then rubs his face a little, his eyes showing concern. « You shouldn’t be going through this alone, Rey. »

 _I am not,_ she longs to say, but she holds herself back because… how could he understand ? She tries to give him a reassuring smile. « It’s allright. I’ll manage. I’m not afraid. »  

« It’s not a question of being afraid. It’s a question of being supported. You know… I talked to Rose. We could take the Falcon, all 3 of us, and go with you. »

That’s what she loves with Finn. He is the one who will never let her down. She can’t say the same about herself, given everything she hides.

She smiles and shakes her head. « That’s not necessary. Besides, you know that you are needed here. The former troopers you rescued on the last mission need your guidance. »

He makes a face and rubs the back of his neck, his eyes lowering a little. « I’m not so sure I am the right choice for this. » 

« You are the best choice. You know what they went through and you walked the path they have to take. I believe in you.» She slightly rubs his arm and gives him a genuine smile that reminds him of her before she faced her destiny as a Jedi.

A part of him can’t help but regretting she discovered this side of her. At times, he thinks it snuffed all the happiness out of her. If only they had taken another course… If only Ren hadn’t put his filthy hands on her… He longs to murder the knight, not only for his past suffering, but also for the pain caused by him to the galaxy, and more important, for what it did to Rey.

He sighs then looks back at her. « Yeah, I wish I could be as convinced as you are. Anyway. You’ll be careful, yes ? »

« I’ll come back in one piece. I promise. »

She keeps smiling, but her eyes are haunted.

All he can do is pulling her in a tight hug, and praying for whatever entity watching over them to bring her home safely.

 

***

**2 hours before Odessen**

 

« We haven’t done this in a long time. » Rassth Ren stands in front of his master, his hands behind his back, his eyes at the same level and wearing similar clothes.

« I’ll need you to keep the illusion for the next two days. Will you be able to hold it for so long without the mask ? » Kylo Ren’s voice is devoid of its usual edge. How long as it been since this happened last ?

« I will manage, my lord. » He slightly bows his head. « I’ll have Tanoras Ren help me, if I feel any disturbance in my ability to conceal my features. »

Kylo steps back and nods before turning to grab his lightsaber.

« Ben. » Rassth Ren is perfectly conscious of the fact that he could very well be killed for using that name.

Kylo freezes in his track, but the knight behind him feels no discomfort. An encouragement, perhaps, to go on. « We are not going to be able to hold things together if nothing changes. It’s just the five of us with you against a whole army. »

Kylo turns and looks at him, his face not its usual blank mask but something more alive, something more like himself. « I am well aware. Leaving now and vanish, however, is not an option.»

« Then what are our options ? » answers the knight, his tone calm and a lot less protocolar than before.

« They are limited, but our priority is to take down Hux and those loyal to him. I am already working on that, and the strategic positions Kira and Daine are holding will make a difference.»

Kira… Daine… Names he hasn’t heard in years from his master’s mouth. « Can we really do this ? »

« We will. » answers Kylo with a nod.

« If I ask you where you are going... »  says the knight even more quietly.

« Don’t ask for answers I can’t give you yet, Nervan. »

Their eyes remain locked so that the knight can read the depth of his master’s intents.

That’s all he needs.

* * *

 


	26. Odessen

** Part 26 : Odessen **

26 weeks after Crait’s battle.

 

He hasn’t expected to hit Odessen’s orbit first. For a few moments after he exits hyperspace without feeling her near, he wonders if he has misunderstood her intents. Perhaps has she changed her mind ?

For a fleeting second, he wonders if it wasn’t all just a trap to attract him alone in a desert area. Then he curses himself for thinking that way, because he knows Rey is honest, and he owes it to her to not minsinterpret her requests.

He waits for her, surrounded by the silence of space. He barely ever has the luxury of stopping all his activities to observe the universe around him anymore. He used to do this, with his dad… a long long time ago… in what feels like another life.

***

24 years ago, somewhere in space.

 

« Do you see that bright spot right there, kiddo ? »

Han is casually sitting on the pilot seat of the Falcon, his five years old boy on his lap. He tries… Force knows he tries to connect with that little man, half him and half his love. But that little extension of him remains an enigma. A mystery he is unable to solve.

Ben is watching through the duraglass, his brown eyes always carrying an underlying sadness, no matter how many times they try to soothe him. The boy nods but at the same time, he wonders what is so special about that blinking light lost in space.

« This is the sun near Yavin 4. I got to know your mother there. It was a few years ago, you see ? When the bad guys were still ruling the galaxy. »

« Are all the bad guys gone, daddy ? » Of all the questions he would have expected, Han didn’t foresee that one.

« Well, Most of them. We kicked their asses, you see ? Mummy, uncle Luke, uncle Chewwie and I. » He rubs his son’s side with his thumb, wondering once again why Ben always looks so grave. « Don’t tell your mother I talked about kicking some asses, ok ? ».

Ben looks at his dad and gives him a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. Han knows the boy is tired, having woken him up from yet another nightmare less than 10 minutes before. He won’t be able to put him back in his bunk, though, as in his sleep, Ben used the force which led to chaos in the resting space.

« Come here. » says Han as he pulls his son against his chest after grabbing the lucky dices hanging a little above their head. Ben cuddles, but his dad can feel the remaining tension in him. He sighs and rubs his boy’s back, his eyes drifting toward Yavin IV’s sun.

« Someday, you’ll be a damn good pilot, Kiddo. You’ll run through the galaxy and once you’re ready, you’ll bump into the perfect woman. She’ll get under your skin with her antics, but you won’t be able to leave her behind even if it changes your life forever. »

Han puts the dices into one of his son’s little hands and wraps his arms completely around him. « Yeah, that will be different, but you’ll love every minute of it. » He slightly smiles when he feels his son burying his face against his shoulder and he rests his head over Ben’s, hoping with all his heart that his boy will be able to catch some undisturbed sleep.

***

When she exits hyperspace, she connects to him almost immediately. A feeling of relief washes over her and the burden resting on her shoulders suddenly feels more bearable. She turns her ship and they come face to face, simply floating in space.

_What a sight,_ she thinks _. A First Order ship and a resistance X-wing face to face, and yet, no one is firing._

He chuckles at that comment,  her mind being an open book to him. _We still could see who is the best pilot if you insist,_ he says in a teasing tone she doesn’t know he can take.

She barely smiles, feeling warmer by the minute as the force flowing through her fully registers his presence. _I wouldn’t want to embarrass you_.

He wishes he could see her face right now just as she wishes she could do the same with his. _First one on the ground ?_

_I hope you won’t mind watching my tail the whole time._

She then turns her ship and punches the engine button, her X-Wing suddenly springing forward and racing toward the planet.

She knows he is laughing. She feels it in every fiber of her being.

***

The small island over which they land is near the equatorial part of the planet. They don’t have to communicate to know that this is the place where they need to be. They both feel it at the same time, as soon as the enter the athmosphere. There is an ancient force beacon, there, a quiet power, neither light, nor dark, calling to them in an almost unavoidable way.

Rey lands her X-Wing first and as she turns off the ship’s system, she truly realizes what she is doing. Ben is almost at arm length and she can’t lie to him anymore. She will not pretend they can’t go in the same direction. Especially now that they are walking the same path.

Ben lands his Tie-Silencer a few feet away from her ship, facing it in what could be seen as a threatening way for anyone not knowing the link existing between the two pilots. He immediately proceeds to climbs out of it, being dressed in his usual black attires except for the black cape.

She removes her helmet as the cockpit unlocks. Finally, she can see him. Not an image of him but the real him and she realizes that the projections are a dim version of him. She stands and proceeds to climb down after taking the bag containing the sacred texts, knowing that his eyes are on her.

Her feet finally touch the ground and she turns to face him. She isn’t prepared for the violence of her own reactions as her eyes meet his. She would want to say something, but she is caught in the moment and in a split second, she sees once again Takodana, Starkiller, Ahch-to, the Supremacy, Crait, Jakku, Lothal… each moment having brought her closer to him.

A few hours ago, he was still working on a strategy to take down Hux and the traitors following him. Everything looks now distant and almost irrelevant. His eyes slightly lower and she can feel the conflict in him even if she can’t identify the causes of it.

Slowly, she comes closer, her fingers gripping the bag and with each step, she gets more of that addictive feeling of being complete.

He raises his eyes once she is close enough, and in them, she can read the uncertainty and part of the despair he had last displayed on Crait.

He extends his hand for her, much like he did back on the Supremacy but this time, she knows this is not to drag her in a direction she doesn’t want to take. He is ungloved and she realizes that if she takes his fingers, this will be the first real physical contact outside of battle they will ever have.

She extends her hand in slow motion and brushes her fingertips against his, her eyes immediately fluttering shut. She knows his eyes remain over her face as she feels him take her fingers slowly in his hand.

She can hear his breath catching… he is reacting as strongly as her and somehow, this is a relief. There are no visions attached to that touch, this time. No memories, no glimpses toward the future, just an overwhelming feeling of peace taking them both by surprise.

She takes a hard breath and his own eyes shut, his fingers pulling her slowly closer to him.

***

21 years ago on Chandrila.

 

Ben’s moments of peace are scarce, lately. He got used to the nightmares, as they are becoming part of his dayly routine.

He sometimes feels strange, disconnected, perhaps. He no longer fears the sight of blood, murder and destructions those visions are constantly displaying. He is becoming strangely immune to them almost as if the concept of life was losing its meaning or its importante.

His mother is late, yet again. But she promised she would come home. She promised ! So he waits, alone, sitting in the lounge, his eyes on the main access door. He rubs his eyes from time to time, fighting exhaustion, because he knows he has to see her. He needs it, tonight. He knows that.

She appears one standard hour later as he is nearly asleep. She doesn’t turn on the light and removes her shoes, each movement showing that she is exhausted. Her husband is away, training some new pilots, and she knows there is no one to welcome her so late at night.

She steps in the main space and starts crossing it, but is stopped by a sight she is catching out of the corner of her eye. There, on the recliner, is her son, his brown eyes half shut, struggling to remain awake and a part of her can’t help smiling at the sight. She comes closer and kneels, gently rubbing his hair.

 « Look at you. Why are you still awake, Ben ? »

He doesn’t answer. Instead, he sits up and wraps his arms around her neck, burying his face against her shoulder. Leia lifts him and settles, pulling him on her lap and reclining to make herself comfortable.

She knows he probably had other nightmares, and perhaps, nasty visions during his waking state. Things are getting harder and she can’t stop them because she doesn’t have his strength. Maybe Luke would be able to…

Ben relaxes, hearing his mother’s heartbeat and enjoying her warmth. For a moment, there are no concerns left in his mind. The darkness at bay dims and he almost don’t feel it anymore.

There is nothing like the peace his mother brings to him. If only she could be here more often…

***

They are  close enough feel each other’s breath on their skin. He still holds her fingers, but it is a detail, because the hold their eyes have on each other is far more powerful than any hand grip.

Yet, he has lowered their hands and entangled their fingers, in a gesture coming completely naturally to him. Nothing he has ever experienced feels like this. Nothing compares to the peace she is bringing him, except perhaps those rare moments from where he was a child around his mother.

She looks down at their hands then back up at him, being almost amazed by her own reactions. Jakku taught her to be cautious about the intents behind a simple touch, but this doesn’t apply to him and she lets him hold her hand in a way it has never been held before.

He slightly shakes his head, but can’t form any coherent thought to let her know that it’s a first for him. But she knows… oh yes… she knows…

Because she feels it too.

Because for the first time in a very long time, she knows she is where she belongs.

Because she should be afraid, but she isn’t, not really.

Because he is not her enemy, or her ally : he is her equal in every way possible.

Because he is the soft echo that makes her soul resonate.

His free hand raises and he wipes with his thumb the tears that are now running down her right cheek.

He brings her closer in slow motion, almost afraid of breaking the moment. Then his free arm wraps around her, and his eyes close as he feels her small frame resting against his.

She drops the bag carelessly and wraps her free arm around his waist, her face burying against his chest.

She doesn’t know what they are. Neither does he.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hears the voice of his father, from a distant past, his accent dragging over certain words.

_You won’t be able to leave her behind… even if it changes your life forever._

At last, those long forgotten words finally make sense. 

 

* * *

 


	27. Connecting

* * *

 

Part 27 : Connecting

26 weeks after Crait’s battle.

**Falleen**

**Present days**

« Commander Dameron. » Kira Sandeco quickly crosses the hangar to join the space where the resistance X-Wings landed a few minutes ago and is rewarded by the Poe’s wide smile.

« Governor. » He answers, bowing his head in the process, as he keeps his helmet under his arm. « A pleasure. »

« You can drop the formalities. Kira will be fine. » Answers the young woman, her face remaining serious but something in her green eyes showing that she is assessing the pilot.

He nods once, his smile remaining as wide. « Kira, then. General Organa sends her regards and wishes to thank you for the valuable information you provided. Thanks to you, several strategical positions have been dismantled. »

Kira nods then turns and leads him out of the hangar. « It was a group effort, Commander. »

« Please, call me Poe. » Answers the pilot as he walks next to her.

« Poe. I am getting a few new leads from my informers. I’ll give them to you once I have made a background check. »

« You are quite organized for a smuggler.»

« One must do what they have to do in order to survive. » She muses then looks back at her companion as they get close to her office. « I am certain that as a high ranking resistance member, you see what I mean. »

He stops and nods, any trace of amusement briefly vanishing from his face. « I do, yes. » His tone is a bit low and she knows that despite the constant casual facade, this man has seen and done a lot. « Survival depends on our ability to adapt, sometimes in the blink of an eye. »

« On our ability to adapt, or to make a stand in the blink of an eye. »

Poe can’t remove his eyes from her piercing green orbs, and in them, he can read that there are many things she doesn’t say.

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

Finding sleep is always difficult for Kira. No one knows because she doesn’t tell anyone, not even to master Skywalker even if he probably guessed. Once she is certain the others are all asleep, she sneaks out of her little hut and has long walks all around the facility until she is exhausted enough to fall asleep.

There is something missing in her life and somehow, she knows she isn’t alone with that feeling. She knows that the master’s nephew is experiencing something similar.

The others tend to run from him because they don’t understand his behavior and his constant anger.

She doesn’t. If anything, he is expressing what she still hesitates to let out. It’s not that she doesn’t want to be judged. It’s already happening anyway. No, for now, she doesn’t know the right way to display what is happening within her and this is why she remains around Ben so much. From him, she gets the feeling that she can learn.

She isn’t the only one who could learn from him too. The others don’t talk to him but as they sleep and as she brushes over their mind while walking through the huts,  she knows that there are at least 8 others. 8 filled with doubts, fearing what Master Skywalker would say if he knew the kind of deviant thoughts they sometimes harbor.

There is Nervan, who loves Adara, and Adara who loves Nervan.

There is Graith and his wish for fame, Daine who can’t quiet the will for revenge that flourished in his heart the day his family was killed.

There is Jelan who doesn’t understand the restraints Master Skywalker is always urging them to apply, because if the force is so strong in them, then it has a meaning !

There is Treya, one of the newcomers, who doesn’t quite understand what is expected of her and who gets out of control as a result.  Jerrica, who has been sent  to the temple without her consent to control abilities she never knew she had.

And then, there is an old one. Kelm. One of the first students Master Skywalker recruited when he built that temple. Kelm, whose silent disagreement with the master’s method shows when he believes no one is watching.

They hide.

Like she does.

She gets close to Ben’s hut because somehow, being around him always soothes her. There is as a spot where she sometimes hides, stuck between a bush and one of the walls, and from there she closes her eyes and connects with his troubled mind.

Tonight, she has to join that spot in a hurry, because she hears feet over the gravel. She barely breathes, not wanting to be caught  and having to give explanations about her whereabouts.

She focuses and doesn’t even have to project her abilities. She knows that the master is entering Ben’s hut. A late night discussion, perhaps ?

No… how could this be ? She can feel that Ben is asleep. She feels the usual tension of his sleeping state. She takes a soft breath and centers herself, feeling if not seeing everything happening in the hut. She berates herself… if Master Skywalker focuses, he could very well see her…

But… But…What is that ? What is she feelings ?

The master is upset… so very upset… and desperate also… yet Ben sleeps and is unaware his uncle is here… Why is he here… why is…

She hears a lightsaber being ignited and immediately knows it comes from the old Jedi… then her mind screams, and screams some more !

_BEN, WAKE UP!_

She stands just as she hears another lightsaber being ignited and the sound of two blades colliding.

She pales, her eyes wide in fear and confusion.

Then a scream cuts the silence « BEN ! NO !» and the hut’s roof collapses.

She stumbles, something in her screaming in agony. The master wants to kill Ben ! he got there to kill his own nephew ! This is the moment when everything changes. This is when people like her, like the 8 others, like Ben live or die.

Her choice is made in a split second. She will not die. She will gather the 8 others and together, along with Ben, they will make it through that night.

She ignites her lightsaber and runs through the huts, most of the padawans already coming out with their own weapons to assess the situation.

She knows then that before the sun rises, most of them will be gone.

***

**Odessen**

**Present days**

They walk in complete silence for perhaps an hour before the find the opening of a cave, hidden within the core of a thick forest. The lack of conversation isn’t in any way uncomfortable. On the contrary, it perhaps strenghtens the silent communication happening between their bodies.

Rey barely allows herself to release Ben hand, and when she does, because they have to climb or move around something blocking their path, she makes sure it is only for the necessary amount of time, then, she grabs his fingers again.

Sometimes, their eyes lock, and it makes them smile because they are still not used to the feeling of completion it brings them. For the first time in some very long years, Ben feels truly at peace.

They have been attracted to that cave. It has been calling for them and neither tried to resist. Rey looks up toward the top of the entrance and sees a faded carving that makes her frown.

« I know this symbol. I have seen it before. » She reluctantly releases Ben’s hand then knees, opening her bag and taking out one of the sacred texts.

Ben observes what she is doing then looks back at the carving.

« It’s a crest, Rey. It belongs to the Zlren civilisation. They are long gone. »

She looks up at him and stands, showing him the crest in one of the sacred books. Ben looks down at what she is showing, then their eyes meet again, their breathing instinctively synchronizing.

« They were one of the first force sensitive civilisation. Rumored to be living around the same time as the Celestials. »

Her grip over the book slightly tightens, their eyes being unable to unlock. « What are the Celestials ? » she almost whispers as if her vocal cords are failing her.

« The keepers of balance. Long gone as well. »  He is searching her face for any sign of discomfort, but she simply looks mesmerized.

« And the Zlren ? Were they like them ? » She goes on with the same tone.

« It is difficult to say. We barely have any datas about them. They vanished before the dawn of the galactic community.  But perhaps, with your book and with that cave…»

« Caves are revelators for us, aren’t they ? » She whispers, remembering how her visit to the cave in Ahch-To scealed their common fate.

He half smiles, seeing that moment in his mind as clearly as she sees it in hers. « They are, yes. » He then takes her book and safely put it back in the bag that he immediately balances on his shoulder. He then extends his hand for her, his eyes so intensely watching her that she nearly feels knocked off her balance. « Shall we ? »

She safely grabs his fingers and ignites her lightsaber to light their path.

***

**Finalizer’s hangar bay**

**Present days**

« Have you been able to locate the tracker you installed on his Tie-Silencer ? ».

It is perfectly unusual for a general like Hux to talk to the engineering team as he feels well above them in term of ranking and importance. Yet, lately, Kandar Ren has noticed a pattern in the red head’s routine. A routine that involves frequent contact with a good portion of the maintenance team, which could lead to two main threats : tracking and sabotage.

« Not yet, sir. » answers the engineer. « However, several spacial data relay’s are down and we are currently working on setting them back online. »

Hux purses his lips. « How is it that each time I need something, nothing is ready to provide it ? You are supposed to be members of the elite ! The First Order rules the galaxy ! and this…»  he nearly yells, waving at the pieces of computer around him « This is the biggest display of incompetence I have been given to see ! I am not asking for Alderaan’s recreation ! I simply wants to locate a single Tie-Silencer ! »

Kandar doesn’t even have to move from behind the crate he is hidding behind. He can perfectly picture the crimson color over Hux’ cheeks, and the look of utter frustration displaying in his eyes. He is probably flexing his fingers and slightly shaking out of anger… this man never truly had what is needed to keep a cold head.

« Do something before I decide you will be more useful cleaning up the trash chutes !» Happy with his nasty comment, Hux turns on his heels and stomps back to the elevator in order to join the command center.

This is exactly what Daine had planned Hux would do and also exactly why he had contacted Kylo to let him know that Nervan’s abilities would perhaps be needed on short notice.

From behind his crate, he takes out the force communicator Jelan created for them a long time ago and sends a coded message to the knight of Ren still stationned on Mustafar.

***

**Snoke’s castle, Mustafar, 6 years ago.**

 « I don’t like the idea of letting our exchanges being known by non-force users. We may not be safe here.»

Jelan looks at his 5 companions and shakes his head. « We can’t trust anyone here, I feel it. »

« Ben says this is where we have to be. » Answers Kira with confidence.

« I know what he said. I also know that we are surrounded by people not getting what we are and we are outnumbered. » adds Jelan.

Graith snorts as he is unscrewing part of his lightsaber. « We could take them all down. They are just regulars. »

« We shouldn’t underestimate them. » Says Adara, her arm linked with Nervan’s. « We should never underestimate anyone and the danger they may represent. » She looks up at her lover and Nervan applies a kiss over her forehead. He knows she has yet to recover from the events in the temple, but she will, with time.

« Anyway, whether you believe me or not on that, I made something that will help us remain linked without anyone being able to interfer or intercept our communications. » He shows them a small device and looks at them one by one. « We activate it by channelling the force to modify the nature of two contactors. Once they are linked, we can send over an encrypted message through space… it’s like a force amplificator connecting a force sensitive to another. »

« Have you tested it yet ? » Asks Kira, who, despite her 13 years old already sees the potential behind such a device.

« No, but we can do it as soon as one of us is off planet. »

***

**Mustafar’s Castle**

**Present days**

Nervan presses his communicator’s button and channels the force toward the device, everything connecting in record time. He immediately hears Daine’s voice in his head.

« Hux is on the move. He had a tracker installed in the Master’s Tie Silencer and tries to track him down. You need to throw him off. »

Nervan quickly sends a reply then sets his communicator down and gets dressed. He stops when he hears a noise behind him and sighs. He didn’t want to disturb her sleep, especially after the long mission she faced.

Adara rolls on her back, her nude body barely covered by the sheets. She looks at him and slightly smiles. « Already up ? »

It takes her a few moments to register he is putting on one of their Master’s set of clothes. She sits up and looks at him in confusion. « Nervan ? »

The knight of Ren gets closer and bends, setting a soft kiss on her lips. « I won’t be long. I need to send a message to Hux. »

She frowns. « Why would you talk to that piece of garbage ? »

Nervan slightly smirks, his facial features changing to become a perfect replica of Kylo Ren’s face. « Don’t worry my love… I only wish to terrify that little mouse and to let him believe that the master is still in the castle. »  

« I’ll be happy the day we are rid of that nuisance. » Replies Adara as she lays back in an almost lazy way. « Don’t be long, my love… I hate being lonely in our bed… ».

She gives him a teasing smile as her fingers slowly drag over her breasts, down to her flat and toned stomach then…

Oh yes, Nervan won’t be long. And he will make sure to terrify Hux enough, just to punish him for delaying some quality time with his woman.

***

**Odessen**

**Present days**

Ben and Rey are settled in a large circular space sustained by heavy pillars, each one being carved to represent figures from a species long gone. They managed to ignite some makeshift torches, which bathes them into some golden light. They are sitting on the floor, in front of each other and are sharing rations that Ben brought in his heavy attire.

The sacred texts have been set on the floor next to them but for now, neither are willing to open them. Rey takes a piece of her protein bar and makes a face. « Once you get used to real food, those rations taste like sand. »

« Well they are necessary until we can discriminate what is safe for us to eat in the local environment. » he answers before taking a bite.

She lowers her ration and looks at him for a long while. « Do you plan for us to stay for an extended amount of time ? »

He lowers his portion in about the same way as her and seems to ponder. « Yes. I mean, as long as it is necessary. » He cautiously takes another bite, assessing her reactions.

« But… can you be gone that long ? Or me, for that matter ? »

He sighs then sets his protein bar on his lap and takes her free hand. « Rey… this is about us. Not about the First Order and not about the Resistance. I am here because this is what you need. And I’ll be here as long as you need me to be. »

She looks at their joined hand and shakes her head. « It sounds crazy. » She mumbles, unable to look back at him.

« Maybe for people not feeling that bond between us… but it’s not crazy at all. Rey, we aren’t the first case of force bonded people. There have been many occurrences in the past and even between Jedi and Sith. It’s unavoidable and if we try to repress it… it’s going to destroy a part of us. »

She looks back at him and answers in a sharp and quick tone. « I don’t want to repress it. »

He slightly bows his head, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. « Neither do I. »

She slowly moves her fingers then entangles them with his, her eyes lowering over their joined hands once again. « I don’t understand why I feels the need to touch your hand like that. I’ve never let anyone touch me so much on Jakku. »

He lowers his eyes over their entangled fingers and slightly bites the inside of his cheek. « It’s how our first real connection happened. You are craving for more. »

Her cheeks slightly blush but she can’t really explain why she suddenly feel warmer.

« As do I. » he adds, looking back at her face. Slowly, he raises his free hand over her cheek and brushes his knuckles over her skin.

Rey breath slightly quickens and she closes her eyes. « Ben… » she whispers, her grip tightening over his fingers. « it feels like… »

« In the throne room, on the supremacy. » he finishes, his tone low and warm « When we became one for a moment. »

« I thought I had imagined it. » she whispers, her entire body shivering.

« You haven’t. I felt it too. » He said, his fingers slowly dragging over her shoulder then her arm. « It’s nearly… »

« Intoxicating. » She almost whimpers, losing any type of control over herself as she inches closer.

 Ben’s eyes settle over her lips and for a fleeting moment, he wonders if he has the right to do this. Then the bond takes over once again, giving him all the validations in the world to get close to the young woman in front of him.

He almost hears the will of the Force echoing in his mind _She is yours as you are hers. Two halves of the same soul lost in space, begging to be reunited, to be whole again._

His eyes shut on their own will as he inches closer to her, all thoughts leaving him as he feels the energy radiating from her body. In a swift move, he wraps his free arm around her waist and sets his forehead against hers. « Rey… » He whispers, sounding almost desperate.

She releases his fingers and cups his face with both hands, her heartbeat nearly out of control. « Ben I… » Her lips are trembling as she feels the hold around her waist tightening.

Her breath mixes with his and he loses any type of control. Pulling her roughtly on his lap, he lunges forward and catches her lips with is, the intensity of their physical connection making him groan.

Her arms instantly wrap around his head, and she replies to  the invasion with as much strength, Acting like someone dehydrated in front of a fresh pond of water.

* * *

 


	28. One

* * *

 

** Part 28 : One **

**26 weeks after Crait’s battle.**

 

 

**Odessen**

**Present days**

**There is passion, yet emotion…**

Ben’s fingers are slowly entangling through Rey’s hair as he tests the feeling of his lips against hers, the urgency of their first kiss changing from a burning need to something entirely new.

It feels at the same time like the end of a long chaotic journey, and the beginning of another quest this time greater and perhaps more fullfilling. He is almost afraid of breaking that first contact, in case she is not willing to repeat it afterward.

After a while, Rey is forced to pull back, only barely, so she can take a breath. This is not what she wants in case he already regrets this change between them. Her eyes remain closed, her breath a bit ragged and her lips, red from that sweet invasion, trembling…

Is it from anticipation for more ? Or for fear of losing everything already ?

She moves her fingers up to grab his black locks and is certain he can feel her heart hammering in her chest.

One of his hands brush over her cheek and wipes away a tear that she didn’t notice over her skin.

« Don’t. » He whispers, in a surprisingly soft tone. « There is no reason to. »

His arms wrap around her once again and she instinctively rests her head on his shoulder, her breathing tuned with his.

***

**Falleen**

**Present days**

Poe Dameron leans back on the comfortable chair from the Governor’s private quarters and laughs as he looks at his glass of corellian spiced ale.

« I guess It’s a family thing. My mother was a pilot and I grew up on resistance stories, since this is where her and dad met. ». He sighs then laughs some more. « I guess I was born to become a rebel, somehow. And you ? How did you get to become a smuggler ?»

Kira spins the liquid inside of her glass, her eyes focused on its irised surface. «Survival, mostly. »

« Same reason that made you become a governor ? » answers Poe with an eyebrow lifted.

« Yes and no… the governor thing is more along the line of survival meeting opportunities. » she raises her green eyes to meet his. « I was orphaned at age 7. Then I was sent in some guy’s care, but it didn’t work. By the age of 13, I was running away with a few of the other foster kids and… well we became what we had to become in order to survive. »

« Yeah… I get that. » answers the pilot, his eyes intense on her.

_I doubt you do_ , she thinks, almost with regrets.

***

**Snoke’s throne room, Mustafar’s Castle, 5 years ago.**

Nothing makes Kira sicker than seeing Ben bending the knee and bowing  his head in front of the disturbingly emaciated ancient creature sitting on the throne.

The gaunt monster insists on calling him Kylo Ren, and Ben now forbids them to use his real name aswell as theirs. Snoke has the arrogance to believe this is because Ben shed his old skin.

Little does he know that at night, when he sleeps, the last hope from the Skywalker’s line is being tortured… not by the nasty visions constantly plaguing him through his nightmares but by a voice… A motherly tone, calling him by his given name.

_Ben..._ And he remembers the sweet embraces from his childhood, too rare and too far apart, provided  from that being he loved unconditionally…

And sometimes he has nightmares of her, watching him sadly and asking him : _Why… why my son?_

Being Ben hurts too much…

It’s so much easier to be Kylo.

Kira discovered  along the way how to shield some of Ben unprotected thoughts from the old humanoïd and she is using it every night over his mind as soon as he becomes vulnerable enough.

She never lost her habit of walking through the sleeping quarters. If anything, the events from the temple made her insomnia worse, probably for the best, since she can watch over her companions and make sure they can relatively stay at peace.

 Peace, such a big word for them. There can be no solace after what they have done.

Snoke deems them worthy… they all know they are merely survivors.

This is why she can’t trust him. What he thinks he knows about them is an illusion, or an image he is creating and that he wants to force down their mind. A perfect army of puppets, with at its head the boy he manipulated, she suspects, from day one.

She shields her thoughts as well, at all times. This is her gift and perhaps the reason why master Skywalker never truly worried about her.

« I sense agitation in you, Master of the Knights of Ren. » almost purrs the hideous creature on the throne.

« Skywalker remains out of our reach. The last track led us nowhere. »

The humanoid waves a hand in front of him, in what may appear as slow motion before raising a finger. Kira immediately braces herself behind her helmet, her eyes intently fixing the back of Ben’s head.

 « Kylo Ren » he says in a thundering tone. « You must go back to the start. You must return to the temple.»

The temple… the place they no longer talk about. The resting place of their illusions. She feels Kylo’s tension and immediately shields his mind. She is subtle enough and knows that neither him nor Snoke will be able to feel her own intrusion.

« We will, Supreme leader. » Answers Kylo in a soft and yet determined tone.

In the far end, she can feel Adara’s tension rising.

***

**Odessen**

**Present days**

**Serenity, yet Peace…**

The silence that settled between them is not uncomfortable, perhaps because the connection between their souls remains open and warm between them. 

Rey discovers the feeling of being held and truly shielded from the world. Is it what being protected feels like ? Is it the same for people not sharing the type of bond her an Ben are experiencing ? Is is a force thing ? Or something more human but that she has always been starved from ?

His head rests against hers and she focuses on the pushes his chest make against hers. Already, she becomes addicted to the feeling of him breathing against her and she is afraid to wonder what it will do to her once they have to pull back.

Ben always thought his parents were sentimental fools for always ending in each other’s arms even after long and painful arguments. Now he understands why. The feeling of being near is stronger than any reason to be divided, greater than petty divergences that can be lost through time and space, while this… this feeling… this unity feels eternal.

She slowly raises her head and opens her eyes to meet his…

***

  **Mustafar Castle**

**Present days**

Nervan’s impersonation of Ben is always almost perfect.  If the physical illusion is close to perfection, mimicking the supreme leader’s behavior can prove, at times, to be complicated.

To be Ben, you have to imagine yourself constantly on the edge, raw from wounds that never heal.  You have to feel like you are starved from anything positive, you have to be the sacrifice to your own vision of the world, despite the fact that this vision is at best, unclear, and mostly chaotic.

Nervan settles on the throne and sits As Kylo Ren would, then presses the communicator button. An hologram of part of the finalizer’s bridge appears, hux being surrounded by a few officers immediately scattering as the call from Mustafar is being heard.

« General Hux.» He hisses in a way that immediately makes the hairs rise over Hux’ arms.

« Supreme Leader. » answers the red haired man, reluctantly bowing his head.

« Your presence is requested on Mustafar for urgent strategic matters. »

Hux nearly looks shocked but quickly regains his control. « Mustafar, my lord ? But my current mission is of utmost importance and I feel like delaying it… »

« Are you questioning your Supreme Leader’s commands ? » says Nervan in a warning tone, knowing full well that this is exactly what Hux is doing.

« No my lord, of course. I just wonder what could be more important than trying to locate the traitors among us ? » Hux lifts an eyebrow as if he had proved a point then he suddenly turns red and slightly gags.

« I do not appreciate your questionning of my commands. I will wait for you on Mustafar in 3 standard days. This should give you enough time to wrap your current task. Do not make me wait.»

Hux falls on his knees and rubs his throat as his windpipes once again let air flow freely. One of these days, he is sure, Kylo Ren will have his neck snapped. He will have to kill him first if he wants to survive and finally achieve greatness.

***

**Odessen**

**Present days**

**Chaos yet Order …**

Ben’s eyes lock with Rey’s and he almost look sorry. The feeling of chaos within his heart reaches her mind and she instinctively puts her hand over his cheek, a gesture making him briefly close his eyes.

« I fear I am dragging you in a direction you don’t need to go. » he states and before he can go on, she moves her fingers over his lips.

« Don’t say that as if you were already regretting this. » She pleads.

« Never. » he says with all the honesty he can find in his heart. « I am selfish enough to not regret a single second of it. I told you. I am a monster. »

She instinctively puts her forehead against his, her fingers brushing over his cheek. «  If you are a monster, then so am I. »

« You are far from being like me or from having done what I have. » He replies and she feels nearly dizzy as she feels his warm breath against her face.

« I am monstruous enough to not care about what you have done. I am selfish enough for wanting this despite your allegiance and mine. » She sounds almost drunk as she says it, her voice trembling, urgent and some of the words fading as they barely escape her lips.

« I am chaos, Rey. »

She raises her face a little more when she hears the near despair  carried by his voice. « Not when you are with me. »

***

**Mustafar Castle**

**Present days**

Adara comes in the throne room, dressed in a simple outfit.

« I thought you were supposed to be faster than this. Have you contacted Hux yet ? » Despite her words, her tone is anything but annoyed.

Nervan immediately stands, Kylo’s features dissolving to reveal his own face. He steps down the dais and meets Adara half way, immediately snaking his arms around her. « I’m sorry, my love. It took me longer to prepare myself mentally. When you are around, I have troubles finding in me the sorrow necessary to impersonate him.»

She raises her face and finds his lips with hers, her arms wrapping tight around his neck. « This is quite allright. » She whispers before stealing another kiss.

How could she ever be mad at him, when he has always been her everything ?

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

The longing is becoming too difficult to handle.

Adara knows that sooner or later, they are going to be found, and then, everything will be over. But she can’t find in her the strength to restrain herself, and she knows that he feels the same, because they are matching in every way possible.

Hidden within the heart of their secret cave, Nervan has her trapped against a wall, his mouth attacking her neck and his fingers already fumbling with her Jedi tunic. Two weeks ago, everything has changed between them, and they both fear to see their secret being discovered, for Master Skywalker has been clear : according to the ancient code, Jedi knights are to remain celibate.

Adara has tilted her head to fully give him access and her back arches from time to time to get closer to him, as his hands explore her body. Two weeks ago, she discovered something beyond the intense devotion she was already feeling for Nervan and she wonders ever since why it is deemed wrong among their people.

For her, there is nothing more sacred than the moment when her body and his join as one, when their passion takes over… Passion… the very thing Jedi fear but that she can’t.

He finally divest her from her tunic, leaving her in her pants and undertop as he attacks the other side of her neck. Soon enough, he will be in her once more and nothing else will matter until the morning comes.

She is not paying attention to the growing noise outside of the cave, in the direction of the huts.

***

**Mustafar Castle**

**Present days**

« Everything is changing once again. » Whispers Adara, drunk from Nervan’s kisses.

The tall Jedi bends and lifts his woman before looking around at the throne room. « Soon enough, all this charade will be over. » he says in a more serious tone than what he would have wanted.

« One way or another. » She adds with a brief nod. Her eyes briefly lower then focuses back on him. « but we will survive, won’t we ? »

« Together. Always. » She can see the darkness in his eyes, a feature never present when she is around, unless…

unless someone threatens her.

***

**6 years ago, Luke Skywalker’s Jedi academy, Devaron, Outer Rim.**

Nervan hears first the buzzing of ignited lightsabers. As he pulls back, he sees the look of terror in Adara’s eyes then he turns his head toward the entrance of the cave.

The sounds get closer. Outside, screams are being heard, and it is like the usually peaceful night is turning into the deepest pit of chaos.

He extends a hand, his lightsaber immediately flying to him. He looks back at Adara, as a group of their fellow padawans forces their way in.

« They are here ! I told you ! they are darksiders too ! Like him ! » Spits Sancta and Adara immediately calls her lightsaber to her.

Behind Sancta, three of the oldests padawans come in and ignite their lightsabers.

Adara feels Nervan’s anger rising as if it was her own and she knows that whatever happens tonight, things will never be the same again.

« We are not darksiders. » Answers  Adara in a low tone as she ignites her lightsaber. « But if you threaten us, you will have to face the consequences of your actions. »

« No need to lie anymore. » says Lorion as he flips his sword once. « We know the attack was planned for tonight and we are already quashing your little rebellion. You failed and you’re going to die».

Nervan remains silent, but his breathing is shallow, and Adara feels something close to a burning rage radiating from him as he looks straight at Lorion. He spins and engages with the three men at the same time.

At the same moment, Sancta steps back then flips and attacks Adara, having mastered several of the special moves created by master Skywalker. Adara parries the best she can, but is obviously disturbed by the enclosed space that doesn’t work well with her best fighting techniques.

She ends up stepping back several times, as more padawans get in their cave, their lightsabers ignited. Through their closed expressions, she understands that something terribly wrong happened and that it puts her and her lover in grave danger. She can’t panic now, because if she does, then everything will be over and then…

It is only when Sancta’s lightsaber goes through Adara’s thigh and when he hears the scream that follows that Nervan’s lightsaber turns red.  He suddenly yells, channelling the force to increase his speed.

He exits the cave with Adara in his arms a few minutes later, his eyes forward and his hold over his woman at the same time possessive and protective. He offers no compassion to the pile of mangled bodies he is leaving behind.

Anyone willing to hurt Adara deserve nothing less than a painful death.

He stops when the burning temple comes in view and strangely enough, this does nothing to him. Nothing at all.

All that matters to him is laying in his arms.

Adara turns her head and looks at the temple, one of her hands applying pressure over her wound to try to control the pain through the force. Her mouth slightly hangs open as she slowly shakes her head, disbelief filling her mind.

***

**Odessen**

**Present days**

**There is no Dark Side, nor a Light Side**

**There is only the Force…**

At some point when he found nothing to reply to her, his face has found the crook of her neck. And for the first time in a very long time, he truly experiences peace, just with the power of her scent and of a few stolen kisses. His hold on her is tight, but by no mean uncomfortable.

She wouldn’t want it any other way.

She is rubbing the back of his head, her eyes not looking at anything particular. The light coming from the torches being less powerful as some of them are nearly fully consummated but she would die before making the decision of moving from his embrace to revive them.

A part of her is still scared… scared of losing this fragile step closer, of losing the comfort of his arms, or losing everything that could be if they ever were to…

… be on oposite sides again ?

 Her eyes land on the sacred texts set on the floor next to them. Will they be the key to understanding what they both are ? Because she knows it. She feels it. Whatever she is, he is too.

His breathing is calmer, deeper and she suspects he has fallen asleep a few minutes before. It soothes her, somehow and her eyelids are turning heavy. She doesn’t pulls him away, but with her flexibility and a little help from the force, she manage to lay on her side with him against her.

Her eyes fully close, her entire being focused on his arms wrapped around her, on his breath against her neck and on his scent, overwhelming her and blocking any fragrance coming from their environment.

When sleeps finally takes her, she imagines an ocean. She sees an island, and on the sand, playing with a little boy having black hair and her light brown eyes, she catches The back of a man with long black hair held in a half tail and wearing a sand colored tunic.

 


	29. Closer

* * *

** Part 29 : Closer **

**26 weeks after Crait’s battle.**

**Odessen**

**The next morning**

When she wakes up a few hours later, Rey is alone on the floor.  However, things are different from when she last closed her eyes. A small fire has been built next to her and she is covered with Ben’s heavy tunic to prevent her from feeling the cold.

She raises her head then sits up, holding the dark fabric against her. It smells like wood and ashes, and anything being Ben.  She looks around and  immediately notices that the torchs have been replaced.

She turns her head and spots the books stacked into a neat pile right over the altar. And she smiles then laughs at the idea that Ben is her oposite! Then again, wasn’t he a prince and her a scavenger ?

« What’s so funny ? »

His voice echoes in the large room as he comes back in, holding his lightsaber in one hand and some dead rodents in the other. She spots him and her breath catches as she realizes he is wearing only his pants and a tight black top probably designed to simply avoid the rought friction on his skin of his tunic’s heavy fabric.

It’s not like she has never seen him that uncovered. She actually saw more, once, through a force connection. It had been embarrassing then, but now that things are changing between them, it does to her something more.

« Rey ? » He comes closer and kneels, setting his weapon and the dead preys near the fire.

She smiles at him and shakes her head. « I’m fine. Aren’t you cold ? You are barely covered and it seems to be freezing.  You should perhaps…» and she hands him back his tunic, but he can see the reluctance in her eyes. He puts a hand over hers and gently pushes the tunic back against her.

« It’s actually quite hot outside. The cold you feel is caused by the fact that this chamber is underground. » He then raises his hand and gently  rub a thumb over her cheek.  «  You slept quite a lot. » he adds a little more softly.

« For once, it was undisturbed. » She lowers her eyes, her head tilting a little toward his fingers.

« I slept peacefully too. » he admits after a while, unable to meet her eyes.

« I thought you might be hungry.» he adds, turning his attention back to the rodents. « It’s maybe not what we could expect for a morning meal, but that will have to do for now. »

Rey looks at the rodents and chuckles. « That will be more than enough, thank you. »

***

**Communication between the Finalizer and Falleen**

After spending the night exploring the darkest corners of the Finalizer, Daine finally found something at the same time useful and extremely concerning.  Despite the careful protocol set by the Supreme Leader, this is something he can’t keep hidden until he is safely back on Mustafar. He is just hoping this breach in their plan will not produce a dangerous domino effect. However, what other choice does he have ?

« I know  I wasn’t supposed to contact you or anyone but Nervan, but what I found is too important and you need to relay it to the others and to the master as soon as possible. »

Kira locked herself in her office and is currently leaning against a window with her arms folded, her eyes set on Daine’s hologram.

« What is it ? »

« They are doing researchs on force binding technologies. »

Her green eyes instantly darken. « You can’t be serious. »

« I know what I saw, Kira. We are seriously going to be in troubles if they manage to make it work. »

She hits the back of her head against the frame and briefly shuts her eyes. « We should have guessed. That arrogant and overconfident bastard has always hated what he can’t control. »

« I can sabotage what they have. Thing is, Hux is not a fool. He probably has other research groups scattered in various settlements to perform the same kind of tests.»

Kira looks back at the hologram with a determination only matched by her anger. « Then we are going to have to find and hit these settlements full force and all at once. »

Daine shakes his head and she can tell from his body language that he is tense. Perhaps,  has he felt the effect of the force suppressants ?

« We are not even sure we can find leads about those settlements before it’s too late. What if we miss some ? If we do, they might as well put the remaining facilities on full lockdown.» he muses.

« I can activate more bounty hunters. With a large amount of credits, we’ll get what we need. The only concern we should have is building a combined strike to get them all at the same time. That’s not something we can drop on the resistance. They don’t have enough forces and manipulating them for that would be… perhaps to revealing.  We are going to have to effectively split the First Order between those loyal to the Supreme Leader and those following Hux. »

« I don’t like that, Kira. This is going too fast. We can’t be sure our men will blindly follow our command to hit their former comrades. »

« And what do you expect, then ? » She answers, annoyed. « To see the five of us plus the Supreme Leader take down the whole First order all by ourselves ? »

« I’d be more radical… we need to cut the Red Head. » he adds with force.

« An assassination ? Give them more reasons to turn on us. If you want to do that and get away with it, then it has to be done by the resistance and they would have to cut the other heads loyal to that snivelling bastard. We can’t leave our marks in anything like that.»

« Question is, how would they reach that point ? And would they just kill him without a trial ? »

Kira tilts her head, her fingers rubbing over her chin. « If we set the right conditions, and if we play with the right person… »

***

**Resistance Headquarters**

«General Organa, Poe Dameron contacted us from Falleen and is confirming the datas regarding the  two settlements  we identified  a week ago in the outer rim. »

 Leia raises her eyes from the holopad she was currently using and lets out a breath. « That’s wonderful news, Finn. I expect we’ll be able to launch an attack by the time the commander and Rey are back.»

Finn nods then pulls a chair and sits, looking intently at the general. « I need advice. »

Leia sets the holopad down and bows her head « what would you like to know ?» 

« It’s about the stormtroopers we rescued. » Finn looks slightly embarrassed and looks around as if he was searching for something he couldn’t find in his environment.

« Is there a problem with the deconditionning protocol ? » she asks as delicately as she can, because she knows this is a sore topic for him.

« Oh ! Um … no. Not at all. It’s something else that I hadn’t expected and I am not sure I am comfortable with it. »

Leia extends her hand and pats his, offering him a patient smile. « Just tell me, Finn. »

« They want me to be their leader ! » He replies, obviously disturbed by the whole ordeal.

« I actually think this is a great idea. » she says, ln a near cheery tone that earns her a disbelieving look from the young man in front of her.

« But Leia, I mean general, we just freed them ! I don’t think it’s fair to make them go back to what they were. »

« Oh, Finn… » Leia chuckles and then leans back a little. « They are not asking for you to recreate a military corp. They simply seek for your guidance because for them, you are a symbol. You are the first who found freedom and took it. »

« Yes but can they really achieve freedom if they are already ready to jump back into a corp where decisions are made for them ? » Finn nervously scratches the back of his neck then sighs.

« You should perhaps consider things a little differently. » replies the general with a smile. « They are now rebels, Finn, and they see what they went through. Like you, I am sure most of them are ready to put an end to the First Order’s reign, not because they are part of an army… but because this is the right thing to do for everyone. It’s them, as individuals, wanting to build a better universe, and they chose you to teach them. »

Finn looks at Leia, wishing he could find words to reply to this, but no word is powerful enough. He simply nods, aware of the responsability naturally falling on his shoulders, but strangely enough, being at peace with it.

« You’ll do great ! » She adds with a pat on his hand before taking back the holopad and resuming her reading.

***

**Odessen**

**A few hours later.**

The idea of exploring the rest of the facility before starting their work on the books was first brought up by Rey.

« Scavenger instinct ? » He had said in an amused tone, to which she had replied « Because your highness is not the least bit curious about this place ? ».

Ben loves the way she speaks her mind in front of him. It makes him feel less of a monster and more of a normal person. She holds no fear when she looks at him, despite all the things he has done. She looks at him with a compassion no one has for him anymore, not even his knights, who seek from him guidance and leadership.

Before her, he never realized he was starved from those things.  Snoke’s hold misguided all his needs, turning him into a cold weapon in a war… he is not sure he wants anymore.

He watches her as she is climbing a wall, her toned and light frame moving up as if the height meant nothing. Her  small hands fit in each possible hole, just to be replaced by her skilled feet, and he wonders if she realizes how much she relies on her natural grasp of the force when she does that.

« Can you see anything ? » he calls up, now that she has almost reached the opening on top of the wall.

She secures her position and tries to look inside. « It’s dark ! » She replies, looking down at him.

« Come on, get back down here. There has to be another access to that room. I don’t see why the builders would have put an entrance up there. »

« Maybe that it’s a test ! only those able to come up here could go on ? » She says, laughing. « That obviously leaves you out ! »

He lifts an eyebrow then smirks. « Is that a challenge ? »

She tilts her head with a smile « What if it’s one ? »

« Then I have no other choice but to take it. » he replies, faking annoyance but amusement being clearly written on his face.

He gets close to the wall and gets into the process of climbing, lifting with ease his huge frame as he moves his way up.

« Not too bad for Royalty. » She teases and he increases his speed, having memorized the path she took.

He joins her in no time, securing his position merely inches away from her. He leans forward a little and gives her a half smile. « I’m not Royalty. »

« Right… the title is something else… empe… »

« No. » he cuts, his eyes serious but by no mean annoyed. « Nothing of the sort. »

« Then what are you ? » She asks, all traces of teasing gone from her face.

He slightly lowers his eyes then looks back at her. « Do we need labels ? Sith, Jedi, First Order, resistance… What does it mean ? Do you feel you are fitting in any of those categories ? Because I don’t. Not anymore.»

She catches something out of the corner of her eye and turns her head, looking through the opening. « Ben… look. » She says in a calm voice.

He turns his head and looks inside, just to spot two ghostly forms giving enough light to get a good view of the room. It seems to be a huge circular place with a tiled floor and an altar in the middle, supporting something.

One of the ghostly form, a woman, looks up at them. The other, a man, walks behind her then stands next to her as if he was expecting Rey and Ben to join  them. 

« Force ghosts. » states Ben as quietly as he can. « They don’t appear often. »

« Only when we need them. » She whispers before looking at him. « We have to get down there. »

He nods and lets her get through the opening first, before following her, both climbing down the wall with ease.

***

**Falleen**

Poe Dameron walks to his X-Wing with confidence, but perhaps not as fast as he used to, as if he was reluctant to leave just yet.

« Thank you again for all your support. The datas you provided so far are invaluable and are changing the course of that war. »

« We will do what we can to end those military fools. » replies Kira as she stops next to the X-Wing. She looks up at Poe and feels strangely disturbed by the fact that she means every word she just said.

« You are definitely increasing our chances of success. »  Poe smiles down at her and her green eyes slightly linger on his lips. What’s wrong with her ?

« We can’t wait for the end of this ordeal. » She replies, feeling slightly dizzy, now.

« Same for us. » He adds, his smile increasing even if his eyes now seem to hold some regrets.

« So… » She adds, her voice having lost all trace of confidence, and she internally curses herself for that. « This is goodbye then. » She feels like a lump in her throat and she has to dig her nails in her palms to keep a tight hold on her force abilities, because she feels on the verge of losing control in that area.

« Until next time. » He says, his eyes having taken a slightly darker color and she can tell his breathing has increased.

She feels the urge of asking when next time will be, but she never gets the chance to do that. Poe cups her face and leans forward before pressing his lips against hers in an almost desperate way.

The next thing she remembers is watching his X-Wing take off, an horrible ache burning in her chest.

***

**Naboo**

**Theed’s palace**

Jelan jumps from the highest cupola to a lower one and rolls, hiding right under a high window. His eyes narrow as he remains on his hands and knees, feeling the kyber crystal of his ligthsaber vibrate in tune with his force abilities.

He quickly looks inside then goes back to his crouching position, having gathered the datas he wanted, so far. The lead was correct. Something was heavily guarded by Hux’ loyalists there and it was clearly related to the Skywalker’s line.

Jelan takes a device out of his pocket and presses a button, a speeder leaving the shore and joining his position. He jumps on it with ease and flies away toward the shore.

He then turns on his force communicator to contact Mustafar but is cut short by the message Kira sent hours ago about the force suppressing technology. He looks back toward the palace and narrows his eyes.

Jelan has developed a military mind over the year. It was his way of surviving Snoke. Thanks to this, he knows Hux is not the kind of man to go in many directions. As a good strategist, he sees a goal and points all his actions toward it.

Naboo is a symbol. This is where the first Skywalker met the one who changed his destiny. Jelan knows that Kylo… Ben, at some point, saw himself as his grandfather’s rightful heir, despite the atrocities Vader commited. Hux knows this too and this place could very well be unsettling for the last of the skywalker’s line…

Unsettling enough to push him to do a lethal mistake ?

Jelan reaches the shore then jumps on it, looking back at the castle. If he was Hux, this is the scenery he’d choose to execute the last heir in order to become the legitimate ruler. What started there will end there, for the good of the galaxy.

And… to execute someone as powerful as Kylo Ren… you have to have the technology that goes with it.

Quickly, he turns on his communicator and sends a message to Falleen, hoping Kira will be able to contact their master. « Kira, Hux would gain no benefit in multiplying his force suppressing devices. To his knowledge, we are only six users left, along with the resistance girl. I believe he built this device in order to control the master for the execution he is planning, I believe, on Naboo, in the craddle of the Skywalker’s family.  I am currently on Naboo and will further my investigations to see if a timeframe for the coup is already advanced. »

Jelan turns off his communicator and looks back at the Castle.

No. He won’t let Hux kill Ben. Not after all they went through together.

This will… never happen.

* * *

 


	30. Looking for something

* * *

 

**Part 30 : Looking for something**

**26 weeks after Crait’s battle.**

**Odessen**

 

Ben is the first to reach ground level as he jumps and lands gracefully on his feet. He looks up and surprises Rey by grabbing her  by the waist once she is within range.  He sets her on her feet and she turns, instinctively smiling at him, touched by his kindness. 

His hand finds hers and as he turns to watch the force ghosts, she can tell he is slightly moving her behind him.

_A true knight_ … she thinks, and doesn’t move to assert the fact that she can defend herself. It feels good for once to be protected instead of being seen as « the solution ».

The female force ghost raises her chin, and everything in her shows that she probably was a woman of great power in her time.

The man behind her, seems to be pacing, as if he is guarding her, observing at the same time Ben and Rey. His eyes land on their joined hands and he seems to reach for the female force ghost’s hand without being able of touching her.

Rey holds Ben’s hand a bit tighter. « Who are you ? » She asks, remaining focused on the couple in front of them. « Are you related to Qui-Gon Jinn ? »

Ben immediately looks at her and lifts his eyebrow. « How do you know that name ? »

She looks up at him and squeezes his fingers a little. «He appeared to me once. He is the one who hinted that you could help me with the sacred texts. » 

« He is the one who discovered my grandfather back on Tatooine. He was Anakin Skywalker’s first trainer. »

Rey slightly open her mouth, her eyes widening, but is cut by the female force ghost.

« We come from a very ancient time. Long before this troubled era. I am his wife. » The woman waves her hand toward the man, who is still hovering over her.

« And I am her husband» states the male force ghost. The woman slightly turns her head toward him, the color of her hand becoming more solid as she lifts her fingers. The man then raises his own hand and slowly entangles their fingers, both force ghosts looking like peace finally settled within them.

« Husband ? Wait… How can you be married ? You are force ghosts, therefore, you are Jedi, and I thought that the Jedi code was forbidding exclusive attachment. » States Rey, remembering some of the things she was told by Leia back on Ahch-To. 

Ben keeps his eyes on the force ghosts and slightly nods. « This is because they are not true Jedi… not in the way we know them  to be. »

« Is there such a thing as a true Jedi, Ben Solo ? » asks the woman.

« There is the Jedi path, and there are other ways, equal in the force. » Adds the man without releasing the woman’s fingers.

« The way we took. The way you are taking. The way of the balance. »  The woman looks up at the man once more, her hold on his fingers tightening.

« There is darkness. There is light. And there is everything in between. » Adds the man, his other hand raising and brushing over the woman’s cheek before putting his forehead against hers.

Rey looks up at Ben, confusion written on her face, but his eyes stubbornly remain over the two force ghosts, as if he was frozen.

« You mean… there is the Sith way, the Jedi way, and then, something else where the two ways connect ? » finaly asks Rey as she looks back at the two ghostly figures.

The woman then looks back at Rey  and takes a step closer, without releasing her hold on the man’s hand « Divisions between darkness and light are artificial. So is the idea of beings being divided according to what they harness the most. The Force is one in all its complexity. With light comes darkness. With darkness comes light. One exists because the other is here in contrast. »

The woman’s eyes then settles on Ben’s face. « You exist because she exists. » She waves her free hand toward Rey, her motion being slow and graceful. « She exists because you exist. »

« Together, you are whole. Apart, you are disparate and dysfunctional pieces. » _Adds the man and Rey feels Ben’s fingers tighten around hers._

_The woman lowers her head and seems to step back to get closer to the man._

_« Like you ? » tries Rey, as she observes the dynamic between them._

« The short time we had together, the challenges we faced, the desperation it cost us were worth the few years we shared. » replies the man, his eyes locking with Ben as if he was trying to make him understand something more.

« Forget the divisions. Remember the Force. Always. » adds the woman as she starts fading away.

« Wait ! » says Rey, releasing Ben’s hand and taking a step forward then stopping when the ground starts shaking.

Ben instinctively wraps his arm around her waist and pulls her back against his chest. The ground immediately stops shaking.

The man then bows his head and starts fading as well. « Being one is the key. » He turns and gets closer to the woman’s form as they both fade away.

Rey remain silent for a while, her eyes not leaving the space where the ghosts were standing only a few second before. The tight lump in her throat threatens to overwhelm her. « Ben…  »She finally says with a trembling voice. « what they said… what they are… it reminds me of some drawings existing in the sacred books. »

Ben lowers his head and whispers against her ear, his eyes on the altar in front of them and his hold around her waist remaining tight.  « Look at what they were guarding. »

 

***

**Poe Dameron’s X-Wing, somewhere in space**

He could say that he regrets this move.

Except for the fact that it would be a lie.

He has wanted to get close to Kira from the moment she told her story during their first meeting on Falleen. He has imagined tasting her lips on various occasions, and through multiple scenarios, none of his mental constructions being as good as the real deal he experienced a few hours before.

It isn’t so much her green eyes, or the fresh color of her skin that attracts him. It’s her personality, all that she projects, and all that she hides.

She is probably much younger than him, but in time of war, does it ever matter ? She is independant… so is he. And she craves for freedom which is his motto in life. Of course, he has many women at his feet. Being the best pilot in the resistance does that. If he had some fun with some of them, none really counted to last by his side for more than a few weeks.

Kira is different. He can imagine himself with her on the long run, probably because she is his perfect match. As independant, as successful and perhaps as rebelious as he is.

He chuckles a little and rests his head against the back of his seat, as he is watching the hyperspace vortex in front of him.

She didn’t push him away. She was surprised, that he could tell, but she returned that kiss. And the few that followed. He even heard a faint sound of appreciation when he dragged his fingers over her arms. And when he pulled back, the flush on her face told him all he needed to know about how much she appreciated that move.

He’ll have to make sure to do it again, soon. 

Yes… soon…

***

**Odessen**

 

Rey’s eyes fall over what looks like a faintly glowing metallic and obsidian cube.  « What is it ? » She whispers, the comfort of Ben’s arms bringing her peace.

« It looks like an Holocron. Holocrons are artefacts used by force sensitives to archive important datas.  It can only be opened by people able to harness the Force.»

« What is it doing here in this abandoned place ? »

« It isn’t an abandoned place, Rey. It’s an ancient Temple, guarded by the two force ghosts we just met. It may looks abandonned because there aren’t many true force users left in the galaxy, but… it is just waiting until a new generation of force sensitive find their way to the Force and starts seeking for answers. »

She closes her eyes at the soft tone of his voice and is only aware of his arm circling her waist, while his other hand gently rests on her arm. She feels his solid chest behind her back and his heartbeat tuning with hers.

She knows then that this is what she can truly call Peace.

« Did you know when you decided to bring me here, that there was a temple on this island ? » She softly asks, her head slightly turning toward his.

He lowers his head even more, his lips brushing against her temple.

« I knew where to go the moment I felt you on orbit with me. It called for us as a unit. »

She raises her head even more, their forehead almost touching and for a moment, shed ares opening her eyes to meet his soft brown orbs.

« Ben, are we… » Her voice cracks and he brushes his nose against hers.

« We already know what the future holds, Rey.  You saw it as I did. You… and me… »

« But how ? » she almost pleads as the gap between their current situation and what they both feel as a possibility seems  too big.

« We’ll figure this out. In time. » he keeps their eyes locked, not caring about the holocron lifting on its own above the altar.

« In time. » She repeats, looking almost hypnotized by him.

« There is one thing we need to do together for now. » He adds, a soft smile playing over his lips as his hand drags from her arm down to her hand. Slowly he entangles their fingers and raises their joined hands in front of them, Rey’s palm being up.

Both turn their head at the same time, their eyes fixed over the holocron.

« Call it. » He whispers against her ear.

She takes a soft breath, her skin covering in goosebump as she feels his lips brushing against her earlobe. Her eyes remain on the holocron, and as she pictures it flying toward them, she sees the cube moving in slow motion, then landing in her palm.

« Just like he said… Being one is the key. »

***

**Mustafar**

 

As soon as the The Finalizer appears on orbit, every alarm in the castle start screaming.

 Adara fastens the anti static part of her armor with expert moves before adding her cape over her shoulders. She looks at Nervan, her eyes considerably darker because of the adrenalin rushing in her system.

They are ready, of course, Daine having warned them of the incoming problems before litterally vanishing within the Finalizer’s entrails.

In his incredible overconfidence,Hux has believed he could take a single knight down with his stormtroopers before destroying Kylo Ren from a distance while safely staying on orbit.

Nervan is already fully dressed in his regular attire, his armor cladding perfectly his muscular body. He grabs his helmet then looks straight at Adara.

« This isn’t the first time we are facing this. » he says in a low tone.

« And this won’t be the last. » she adds with assurance as she grabs her helmet.

Nervan moves closer and grabs the back of her head to give her a powerful kiss that she returns equally as strongly.

When they pull back, they see in each other’s eyes the determination they had, that night, when the temple fell.

They put on their helmet, ignit their lightsaber, and together race toward the landing bay where their ships are waiting for them.

***

**The Finalizer**

 

 Daine crawls through a vent behind the maintenance bay, all his senses on alert. He knows the force suppressing technology is effective, but is currently stored in one of the lower sections, too heavy to be used as a portable device. To use it on him, they would have to bring him to the storage room and he will not let that happen.

He managed to warn Nervan and Adara first, then sent a message to Jelan and Kira, hoping that she’ll find a way to contact their master before it is too late.

He could have beheaded Hux a thousand time, but this would have solved nothing. This would have created a martyr and would have transformed the portion of the first order loyal to him into an Hydra with too many heads to sever at the same time.

The game is set. The coup is in progress. All he can hope for, is that they have enough forces on their side to stand in front of Hux and win this fight.

***

**Naboo**

It was never meant to last.

Jelan is in the underground part of the city, already activating his contacts among the criminals to make the biggest offers before Hux gets the same idea. He knows words are already being sent off planet and that several powerful groups particularly hating the First Order are already spreading the offer in the Outer Rim.

Some will never forget Hosnian Prime for the benefits they lost when the system was wiped out. Some others will do it for the ones they lost there, when Hux decided to launch the attack under Snoke’s command.

Jelan knows that he is playing his part well and that this will bring some valuable assets in the war to come. But he also is aware of the fact that it is Kira that holds the main card.

***

**Falleen**

So soon after that incredible change. She wishes it would have happened sooner. Now that all the lines are moving, she isn’t certain she’ll be able to keep the illusion up.

She knows what she has to do, though.  She knows it is for him.

Her master… her guide… her brother.

She will follow him, always, even if it means her demise, ultimately.

She locks herself in her office and activates a few key contacts, sending the message to start the broadcast in all the videofeeds of the Galaxy as a priority. She knows that her contacts have under their belt a few technicians that will block any attempts at cutting the message before it’s completion.   

She wishes she could be a fly on board of the Finalizer to see Hux’s face when he realizes what is happening.

* * *

 


	31. Message

 

* * *

**Part 31 : Messages**

**Resistance headquarters**

**Somewhere in the outer rim**

 

Poe exits hyperspace and types the access code that will get him the clearance necessary to hit athmosphere without putting the base on red alert.

He waits for a reply then frowns when none is coming. He then presses the button of his communicator, his eyes scanning space around him.

« Echo Base, this is commander Dameron requesting landing autorisation. »

No reply. Poe frowns and flicks two switches in order to arm his canons. There are no wrecks in sight floating in space, no Star Destroyer… 

Poe presses once again the communicator’s button. « Echo Base, this is commander Dameron do you copy ? »

A screeching noise, then a friendly voice come after a bit. « Poe ! Hey,  mate. »

« Finn ? » Poe lifts his eyebrow. « What’s going on down there ? I’ve been requesting clearan… »

« Huh. Yeah. Sorry about that. Listen… get down there quick. Something’s up and that’s pretty big. »

Not very protocolar…

« Okay… » Poe doesn’t disarm his blasters and sets a course for the surface. « Coming down now. »

« Yeah… must go ! join us in the command center as soon as you land. »

Finn hastily cuts the communication, leaving Poe Dameron with a mix of confusion and worry.

***

**Meanwhile, on the Finalizer’s bridge**

« Cut that broadcast right away ! » The crimson color of General Hux’ face looks almost surreal, as if all his blood had eventually found a way to rush to his head.

The communication operator is frenetically typing on his console, some people barking  in his ears through his earphones in a clear moment of panic.

« Sir, it’s not just on the Finalizer. I am getting reports from most of our outposts and ships in the middle and Outer Rim».

Hux pants, his gritted teeth visible through his retracted lips and some drool threads escaping from his mouth from time to time.

« Contact our fleet ! blast the relay satellites ! I want this communication to be silenced ! NOW ! » He barks and punches his fist over the console.

***

**Falleen, A few minutes later.**

**Governor’s office**

Kira Sandeco pours herself a generous amount of Correlian ale and turns to watch the fallen Star Destroyer currently being dismantled by the local workers. Not all of them have seen the broadcast yet, but she knows people have been smart and have recorded it the second time since it was aired back to back.

She tilts her glass toward the stars and takes a sip, her concern splitting in two. Now that the game is reaching another level, she might be called for other tasks…

What of her and Dameron, then ?

A few weeks back, things were simple. There was the master, her loyalty to him and that was it. Now, there was this annoyingly handsome resistance pilot, his arrogant and yet perfect attitude, and his insanely attractive smile.

She could try to fool herself with the Jedi code, but she is no Jedi and the non attachment rule always seemed stupid to her. You only have to watch Nervan and Adara together to know that the real sin would be to force those two apart.

Seriously, beside the current situation with the split of the First Order and the odds for now against them, she has a major problem and it’s called being deeply attracted to Poe Dameron.

She turns when someone knocks at the door. « Yes ? »

One of the Falleen’s native comes in and bows his head. « Governor, we’ve received intel about the communication relays being currently methodically destroyed by the First Order. »

Kira can’t help it. She smiles. Hux’ temper will always be his downfall.

 « Thank you Yisher. Then again, what can we expect from this kind of people ? they destroy more than they’ll ever create. »

The native bows his head and retreats as Kira looks back at the Fallen Star Destroyer.

 Phase one engaged.

 

***

**Meanwhile, on Mustafar’s orbit.**

Nervan makes his modified T-fighter spin then dive as it speeds toward the Finalizer while dodging the attack of at least four T-Fighters.

« Three more on your tail ! In V formation, ready to split ! Get out of here Adara !» He presses his canons button and 2 rockets immediately speeds toward two of her oponents.

« I’m trying ! » She pulls hard over the stick and her own modified T-fighter makes a very hazardeous backflip. She presses her blaster’s button at the same time, using the force to guide her aim, hitting one of the T-Fighter’s solar panels.

The ship immediately loses control and falls over another T-fighter, both exploding for good measure.

« We need to fall back and make a jump ! More are coming !» Nervan doesn’t follow a linear course in order to disturb the predictions of the pilots trying to take them down. He twists, spins and dives with his ship, all the while trying to hit those still after Adara.

Adara presses some coordinates and sends them to his ship. « Right there ! Follow me ! ». The punches the ignition and gains speed, racing toward the Finalizer.

Nervan presses a button and follows her course at the same speed, gritting his teeth. « Toward the Finalizer ?  Really ?»

She keeps racing toward the finalizer, the T-Fighters following her but seeming to hesitate firing at her. The Finalizer’s canons, on the other hand start firing, not caring if they are touching their own men.

Adara uses the force and pushes away two energy bolts that should have hit her, then suddenly, she pulls had over the stick and moves up above the Finalizer. « First one home, Babe ! » she says then punches the button and makes the hyperspace jump.

Nervan shakes his head and takes the same course, blasting some of the canon, just for the pleasure of knowing that they are not accurate enough at such a close range and that the destruction will probably piss Hux’ off. He opens a communication line as he gains speed.

« General Hux, by order of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren we, the Knights of Ren sentence you to die. Your execution will be programmed according to the master’s wishes. Until then, we advise you of keeping your nasty red head away from our business and make your peace with… no wait. Who would want peace with you ? You’re just dead meat walking.»

He laughs darkly and punches the red button to make the hyperspace jump.

***

**Meanwhile, on board of the Finalizer**

He. Heard. Everything .

The nerves of those damned religious fanatics !  Daring to insult him, a general having earned his position thanks to his hard work  while they were playing with their stupid force tricks !

Hux’s breathing is labored, his face is keeping that dark red color, his eyes are injected with blood and some of his men are wondering if he isn’t about to have a seizure.

« FIND ME THE KNIGHT ON BOARD ! WE ARE GOING TO MAKE AN EXAMPLE OUT OF HIM ! » He yells, his voice raw and filled with rage.

« Sir… » tentatively says one of the lieutenants on the bridge.

Hux turns on his heels and looks at the man as if he was a bug.

« W… we just received an incoming message from the landing bay. It has been sabotaged. » The man, despite being trained as a military currently feels one inch tall.

Hux’ left eye twitches.

« And… before everything was blasted, a ship took off. »

_Maybe that Kylo Ren and his outbursts weren’t that bad after all…,_ thinks the man as he spots the psychopathic look in the general’s eyes.

« What. Ship ? » Asks a beyond irate Hux.

 « Your personal ship. » Blurts out the lieutenant.

Hux simply tilts his head. In a swift motion, he takes his blaster and shoots the lieutenant between the eyes then turns once again on his heels.

« I will not hear anymore bad news for today. » He states then goes to the weapon console.

« I want Mustafar’s Castle obliterated. Now. »

***

**Hux’s personal Ship**

**Somewhere in hyperspace.**

 

Daine takes great pleasure in setting his boots over the white cover of the lounge’s seats. The whole scenery is as arrogant and strutting as its previous owner can be and the Knight of Ren tries to imagine the egomaniac General’s face if he could see him wiping his soles over what might have costed thousands of credits.

He isn’t unhappy with the little stunts he pulled before leaving the Finalizer. Sabotaging the landing bay was the last of many little surprises he left for the general, ranking from water poisoning and air supply tampering to the complete destruction of the hyperdrive system.

It will take the Finalizer days to get the help needed, now that Hux ordered the destruction of the long distance communication relays…

And within days, they can do so much to protect their master, don’t they ?

***

**Resistance headquarters**

**Somewhere in the outer rim**

 

Poe jumps down his X-Wing, puzzled to find the hangar bay completely deserted. He takes out his blaster - _just in case…_ \- he whispers to himself, and runs to the main command center.

He finds the place crowded and has troubles getting in and getting close to the center of the room. There, the whole resistance has regrouped, around Leia, Finn, Rose, Kaydel, Tash and Chewbacca. Their eyes are turned toward a console and Poe frown as he spots a videofeed with the First Order insigna fading to black.

He looks around, the silence being astounding  and everyone seeming to be holding their breath.

« What’s going on ? » He tries, puzzled by everyone’s reaction.

Leia raises her eyes over him as if she was waking up. « Glad to have you back, Commander. Something occured while you were traveling back home. » She then looks at Finn. « Replay it one more time, please.»

Finn types a few things over the console, the recorded videofeed starting again.

A First Order insigna appears, Five masked figures in front of it, their ignited red lightsabers in hand, in guarding mode.

Leia catches her breath once again when her unmasked son appears in front of the recording, the scar splitting his right cheek and eyebrow clearly visible.

« This is Supreme Leader Kylo Ren from the First Order. If you are seeing this recording, it means General Armitage Hux has betrayed our ranks. For the past few months, and under the guidance of Supreme Leader Snoke, General Hux has commited war crimes standing against our wish for balance and order. The destruction of Hosnian Prime with the help of a massive destruction weapon called Starkiller Base was his doing as you can see through this fragmentary archive. »

The video feed cuts to some footages showing Hux’s nearly mad eyes as he makes his speech in front of the stormtroopers right before the deadly shot is being fired toward the Hosnian system.

Then Kylo Ren appears again and goes on with his speech. « General Hux relentlessly intrigued to take the highest ranking position within the First Order, however he has proved to be unworthy of such a title because of his war crimes. How many loyalists have we lost within the Hosnian System ? How many neutral lives were taken because of the delusion of grandeur of a man only aspiring to create chaos ? »

Some new footages appear, showing the building of a new Starkiller device, then cut to the harvesting of a massive amount of  kyber crystal on Ilum.

« A new superweapon is currently being built to replace the fallen Starkiller. I destroyed myself Supreme Leader Snoke who was behind this quest for chaos and I made the decision to stop this madness threatening to take us all down. »

Part of the security footages from the Supremacy throne’s room appear, showing Kylo ren tricking then Killing Snoke, then him fighting alongside Rey after saving her from torture. Halfway through it, the image goes back to Kylo Ren’s serious face.

«  I call for all the loyalists wishing to create some real order and balance, I call for all the neutrals who want to protect what is left of the galaxy, I call for those beyond the First Order, who refuse to leave the fate of the galaxy within the hands of a mad man. It is time to regroup and wipe out Hux’ forces before they become too powerful to be taken down. The fate of the galaxy is within our hands. »

Kylo and the knights vanish first, then the First Order’s insigna becomes darker until it fades to black.

Poe Dameron turns his head and looks at Leia, whose face is as white as snow. He comes to her, takes her arm and makes her sit, the puts his hand over her shoulder and looks at everyone else. Kaydel is already moving to get some tea for Leia.

Finn looks furious… instinctive reaction… he worked for many years in close proximity with Kylo ren.

Rose is beyond confused, as are many of the resistance members in the room.

But it’s Chewbacca’s reaction that is perhaps the most curious. He looks deadly calm. His head is slightly turned toward Tash and he nods from time to time, emitting some soft growls.

Poe gets closer to them and looks at Tash. « What do you think of that ? »

Tash rubs his forehead then looks back at Poe. «  Honest answer ? That was a typical Solo move. »

***

**Meanwhile, on Odessen**

  Ben and Rey settle back in the large circular space where they have left their supply.

She kneels in front of him, looking at the holocron resting in the palm of her hand.

« It feels alive. » She says, her fingers dragging over the surface.

He sits in meditative position and nods as he looks at her face. « The force is powering it. It flows in every living being. Therefore, it is alive.»

She looks back at him and gives him a soft smile that makes him chuckles after a bit. « What now ? »

« It’s just that I remember in the forest. When you told me I needed a teacher.  It scared me then, to imagine it could be you. But now ? I wouldn’t want to be taught those things by anyone else. »

He looks away, troubled by her words, as if they were too good to be true.

« Don’t forget what I am, Rey. » he states quietly.

She sets the holocron next to them and cups his face, forcing him to look at her. « I Know *who* you are. I don’t need more than that. » She is searching his eyes and in them, she reads too many things he would want to keep for himself.

« I still am your enemy. » he replies, putting his hands over her forearms.

« Are you now ? » She whispers, her face getting closer. «  you surely don’t feel like my enemy right now. » She adds, her lips slowly finding his.

Ben sighs and wraps his arms around her, bringing her on his lap. His lips slowly brush over hers in a teasing and yet comforting dance. He slightly dips her in his arms when the kisses become more urgent, and as her arms wrap tight around his neck, he feels a growing heat in the middle of his chest.

Her fingers find their way through his hair and grab some locks tightly, her teeth nipping at his lips and her motions becoming a bit more agressive. Like him, the middle of her chest fills with liquid heat and she breathes increasingly hard throught her nose.

Ben pulls back after a bit, his forehead resting over her shoulder as he holds her as tightly as possible. Her hold around his head tighten, and she curls on his lap, almost as if she was trying to shield him.

« Don’t ever leave me. » he whispers, almost hoping she couldn’t hear him.

«  I’ll never leave you. » She replies against the top of his head.

* * *

 


	32. Regrouping

* * *

**Chapter 32 : Regrouping**

**27 weeks after crait events**

**1 day after the broadcast**

*******

**Korriban, Outer Rim**

 

There is something unbreakable between them. Something almost sacred linking them with an invisible thread.

They used to be six, but one of them never fully connected. He let go of the thread on his own volition a long time ago, out of greed and personal needs, forgetting his part in that unit. Kira had always known he would fail, eventually. It was just a question of time and opportunities.

she has always been the one sewing them together. She was the one seeing them for what they were, not for what they wanted to appear as.

That night in the temple, when she saw two like them fall under the self righteous blows of their former comrades, she promised herself that the survivors would have their chance, along with the one who became their master.

She still keeps that promise day after day.

She never puts her needs above the other’s.

She is bonded to them like siblings are.

Yet, for the first time, something is off. She knows that it comes from her and that if she isn’t careful, it will cause their downfall.

She comes into the ancient cave and follows the torches marking the path to the Sith facility. She knows the four others are here. She can feel them in a very distinctive way : Nervan’s protective aura, Adara and her daring yet delicate personality, Daine’s strategical mind and Jelan’s restless creativity.

As she comes in the large circular space borded with gigantic statues of Ancien Sith, her eyes settle on Daine, assessing his physical appearance.

He knows, of course, what she is searching for and slightly bows his head. « Nothing of importance. » He answers to the silent questionning about any abuses he could have suffered from on the Finalizer.

She nods and her eyes settle on Jelan who is carelessly sitting on the altar, one booted foot over the precious and polished obsidian surface. He is observing Nervan and Adara, who are against a pillar, whispering to each other, their gaze locked as if nothing mattered outside of their own interactions.

Kira looks up toward the cave ceiling. From above, she sees the nearly faded carvings recording the Sith buried on site. As her eyes move down, she spots the last addition, a very recent one, in a much better condition. Graith…

He is home as well despite his betrayal.

« Now that we are almost all here… » says Daine with his usual playful tone «… what are we going to do ? »

« Shouldn’t we discuss about that with Ben around ? » replies Jelan as he jumps from the altar.

« He has yet to make contact. » Kira comes closer and nods. « But he will, once he is able. »

Nervan turns his head and looks at her,  one arm instinctively wrapping around Adara’s waist. « You know where he is. »

« I do. » she confirms, her face remaining deadly calm.

« Then why not joining him now ? What if Hux locates him ? » Adara’s hand moves up and rests above Nervan’s heart, her head remaining against the pillar behind her.

« Hux won’t locate him. » Replies Daine as he chuckles. « He is slightly stuck on Mustafar’s orbit, his hyperdrive is dead and that idiot damaged his own long distance communication system when he had the relays blasted. »

« About that, several parallel communication channels have been opened through the smuggling communities and I am already receiving incoming messages from defectors among Hux’ ranks. » Kira joins the altar and leans against it. « Hosnian Prime’s destruction remains a sore spot for many of our officers and now that they understand they won’t be force chocked for making a stand against that, they don’t hesitate. »

« So, we have roughly a week before Hux is back on track. We need to put this to good use. » Jelan looks at his nails and smirks a little. « I’ve got a few ideas about that. »

« Do tell ? » challenges Daine, a playful smile on his lips. « I’m sure it’s going to be tasty. »

« Kira hold the smugglers and pretends to be one. That’s what she needs to go on doing. Now we need one of us to take our army’s lead. Someone taking Hux’ place by Ben’s side. Someone who knows how they operate and who can pass as one of them. »

« And you certainly have your idea about who we could use for this ? » Answers Daine in an almost arrogant way.

« Of course. That can’t be Adara, for obvious reasons… »

« Careful, Jelan. » Says the female knight in a warning yet amused tone.

« Because you are far from being cold enough.  Don’t make me say what I didn’t say ! » replies Jelan as he raises his hands.

« I have to agree with him. » Adds Nervan before bending his head and nuzzling her neck.

« You’re the obvious choice, Daine. » cuts Kira. « You know how they operate and you have observed them. You can create a character just like I did to take the governor’s position. If you hold firmly the army we have left, if I hold and manipulate the smugglers… we can stand a chance. »

The mood suddenly grow colder as one of them project his thoughts to the others…

_If Hux doesn’t use Starkiller 2 before we are organized enough._

***

**Odessen**

**A few hours later**

 

Another full day passed exploring the facility and the outside scenery.

Up to this point, Rey had been unable to bring herself to open those books, perhaps because getting this task done would certainly mean to go their separate ways again.

Truth to be told, she doesn’t see herself without Ben anymore. She knows this is a huge mistake, because she can’t follow him where he goes, and he wouldn’t be able to come with her when she returns to the resistance.

She knows he is watching her, as her face is turned toward the sunlight bathing the clearing where she settled to meditate.

She doesn’t have to turn around to see him. Her body instinctively registers everything about him. He is leaning against a tree as to avoid direct sunlight. His arms are folded, making his biceps even more impressive. His eyes, impossibly dark and predatory sometimes display longing… sometimes, sorrow.

He doesn’t know what to make of who they are.

Neither does she.

 All that she knows is that the idea of parting is physically unbearable.

He moves from the tree and gets closer. The fallen leaves crack under his boots and she hears the soft brush of the grass under their sole as he moves in front of her. she opens her eyes and looks up at him, just in time to see him extend his hand for her.

This is the story of their life… everything important  between them always passing through a gesture of their fingers. Their first true moment of intimacy on Ahch-to, their biggest mistake on the Supremacy,  their growing closeness here...

She grabs his fingers without a second thought and stands, their eyes instinctively locking.

« I think it’s time to search for answers. » he says, his fingers closing around hers.

Why does it feels less important, now, when before, understanding what she was seemed to be everything ?

She simply nods and follows him back inside, each centimeter of skin connected with him being hyper aware of his presence.

***

**Meanwhile, on The Finalizer**

 

Hux paces.

Is there anything else he can do when his ship is stuck on orbit around a volcanic wasteland, far from everything and especially of any efficient mean of communication to try an contact his allies ?

His previous fit of rage on the bridge is nothing compared to what he is currently experiencing, now that the full extend of the sabotage is known. He takes one of the chairs in his private quarters and throws it against a wall, several locks of his red hair falling in front of his eyes.

His breath comes out fast and heavy as he rushes toward the door and gets out, practically running to the main command center.

Any member of the crew coming in his way ends up mercilessly pushed, the general seeing nothing but his current goal.

When he finally gets on the bridge, all the silents alarms are effective and dozens of crew members are moving from a corner to the next to try to address the multiple problems currently plagging the Finalizer.

It is complete chaos. All the systems collapsing at once. The water being poisoned. The air supply being corrupted. The food storage flooded. No hyperdrive to join a less hostile world. No communication system to call for immediate help. All this being the doing of a single man. One of those crazy fanatics they have to eradicate !

An ensign finally spots Hux and screams « GENERAL ON THE BRIDGE ! »

 Everyone stands still, looking at Hux, tension and exhaustion written on their face.

Hux adjusts his jacket and crosses the bridge, his hands held behind his back. « Current status of our landing bay ? « 

« The latest reports evaluate the destruction at approximately  80%, sir. », replies one of the officers, his eyes foward.

« Are there any ships still in flying order ? » Hux grits his teeth, his red face a true beacon displaying all the negativity he is currently experiencing.

« Most of them have been destroyed. The maintenance team dispatched in that sector believes one of the shuttle can be repaired, but it will take time. »

Hux nods and looks at the officer, his empty eyes piercing. « Have it fixed and send it to our base in the unknown region to get some backup. »

Hux takes three steps forward and stops near the life support console. « What is the current status of our water, food and air supply ? »

The man in front of the console looks straight in front of him, his head raised and his body completely rigid. « All the air filters are being currently replaced. The water has been stored in temporary tanks and is going to be decontaminated through a process currently being put together by our medical team. I am afraid most of our food supply is spoiled. »

« Well… » says Hux in a deceptively calm voice. « We will just have to endure hunger until the rescue mission join us. »

He moves to another console and bends, looking at one of the radars. «The castle ? »

« Obliterated, my lord. » Says the operator, his voice a bit raw, and Hux finds pleasure in knowing he is currently scaring his crew.

  « Any trace of Kylo Ren in the ruins ? » He already knows the answer. He has been fooled enough to make the rash decision of coming here. The force fanatic wasn’t that crazy after all. Neither him nor his followers…

« Our sensors don’t detect any trace of life or any biological remains, my lord. But we could very well be missi… »

« No. » cuts Hux, making the operator flinch. « He wasn’t here in the first place. We have been fooled, but I trust this won’t happen again. »

No one dares replying, as the warning in his tone makes everyone getting goosebump.

***

**Resistance headquarters**

 

Poe never truly agrees with the constant assumptions the others make  when it comes to Leia and her emotional state.

Granted, the latest development took its toll on her. It could be caused by what the rift within the First Order is implying in term of immediate actions for the resistance. Or it could be an instinctive reaction after seeing her own son officially in charge of one of the opponent’s group.

This, however, isn’t what will make her go weak. If she could resist Vader’s torture, if she could  survive the loss of her planet and adoptive parents, if she could accept the death of her husband by the hand of her own son, she will certainly not collapse because the heir is now officially the master of part of their problem. 

Right after the first debrief post broadcast, she locked herself in her quarters, using the excuse of a major headache and the need to sleep for a few hours. Poe knows that she is instead plotting their next move, and working on how to make them all swallow the pill because, truth to be told, the pilot is certain she is going to ask of them something kicking their ethic right where it hurts.

As he stands in front of the general’s private quarters, he rubs the back of his neck. He should have had some sleep while in hyperspace instead of constantly thinking of Kira.

_Oh well_ , he muses… _the green eyed smuggler is definitely a good reason of being exhausted._

He drops his hand and knocks at the door, Leia’s voice immediately inviting him in.

« How long have you remained behind that door before knocking? » says leia, her eyes over her holopad as Poe comes in.

« I’m certain you already have the answer. » replies the pilot in an amused tone.

She raises her eyes and gives him a small smile « That will remain my little secret. » She nods toward a chair and Poe flops there like he has already done dozens of time. 

« To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit ? » she says, an half tired smile on her lips.

« I think you know the answer to this too. » he considers her for a while and folds his arms, giving her one of his most roguish smile. « how bad is it going to get, this time ? »

« Hmmm… » She sighs as she sets her holopad down,  the broadcast video being paused over her son’s face. « We might lose a few allies on this one, but I think, if we play our cards nicely, we might end the whole war for good. »

His eyes drifts toward the holopad then back to her face, his own expression turning serious. « Leia, what are you planning ? »

She leans back and remains silent for a while, and for the first time since he has known her, he can see some signs of her vulnerability. Somehow, this moves him even more than if she had burst into tears right in front of him. He knows she trusts him enough to be 100% honest with him even with the things no one is  ready to hear and he is starting to see where her train of thoughts is leading her.

« An alliance. I think… I think this might be the key. » She keeps their eyes locked until his fall back on the holopad where Kylo Ren’s face is still displayed.

« How do we know this move isn’t a game to make us come out of the wood to wipe us out more easily ? » Poe wishes he could express in front of her all the doubts assaulting him right as he articulate that sentence, yet, nothing comes out because he also can see her point… from a commander point of view…

Which means he knows she probably considered this option as a general should and not as the grieving mother she will always be.

« Because Tash and Chewie were right about something, Poe. This is a Solo move. This is what Han would have done placed in the same situation as his son is right now. I know in my heart that… » and she points a finger at the holopad with a determined face « this isn’t Kylo Ren. This is Ben. This is Ben asking for help and not for him. This is Ben waking up and wanting to do the right thing. »

« Leia… »

« Poe… my son killed Snoke. Whatever his reasons were for doing so, he freed himself and he is coming back to his senses. That rift within the First Order is the best chance this galaxy will ever have but let’s face it… on our own, even if we attack one party or the other, we will never win. With the right alliance, we can change everything.»

He briefly shuts his eyes and sighs. He may love this woman like a second mother, he is also her commander and as this, there are topics he can’t avoid. « Ok, lets imagine we make an alliance with him… What happens when the other side falls  and he wants to rule the galaxy with an iron fist ? »

« I don’t believe he will. » She shakes her head, her eyes returning to the holopad.

« What tells you it isn’t the mother in you talking ? » he knows this is a low blow, but a necessary one.

« I have always been a senator or a general before being his mother, Poe. Even if it isn’t what I wanted. » She says in a sad tone before looking back at her commander. « I don’t think I’ll ever know how to put him before my duty to the galaxy. That’s how I know this isn’t the mother talking. I am seeing signs of a change, and I think peace can be within our reach if we do things correctly. »

He simply nods after a while, thinking it has to be really difficult to be her, at times. «  Allright. Then what do we need to set up, then ? »

Parts of the colors she had lost when the broadcast first aired returns to her cheeks as she straightens on her chair. « Well, I am certain you can be of great help trading with the smugglers, Finn could take the army lead with… »

***

**Odessen, a few hours later**

 

At first,they tried setting the precious texts on the altar in order to protect them, but it wasn’t very practical, so they ended up spreading everything around them in the center of the large circular room, where the floor was made of precious stones arranged to create abstract patterns.

After a few hours, Rey and Ben are sitting side by side, him having a text on his lap and pointing at some symbols and her, having her head lightly resting against his arm as she is watching what he is pointing while chewing on one of the protein bars they had brought with them.

« Those are clearly the expression of balance, and yet, everything around is hinting about the dark side. If only I could remember what those other two symbols mean, this would make things easier. » he mumbles, clearly frustrated by his own limits.

« Maybe that it means balance can also exist for people who reached  and lived through darkness ? »

He turns his head just in time to meet her eyes and she lowers the bar before adding in a softer tone :  « I mean, lets face it, we both touched darkness. But when we are together… »

« It’s not your darkness you touched, Rey. » He says, reaching up and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. « I contaminated you with mine. »

She lowers her eyes, moved by the gentleness of his touch. « My own darkness existed long before you. » she states, looking back at the text. « It was what kept me alive on Jakku. I’ve always felt this thing in me. I used to call that my fighter’s drive. But that’s not it. »

She raises her eyes and looks back at him, being glad their closeness allows her to speak barely above a whisper. « I believe I was born with this in me. It morphed into an ability to fight my way through those years, but it was there long before you. »

The intensity of his brown eyes attracts her like a magnet, and she finds herself unable to move as if he was mind controlling her. « When I was a boy, there was that voice in the back of my head… » He starts in about the same soft tone she previously used.

« Snoke ? » She cuts, but he shakes his head, rubbing away another one of her locks.  

« No. Not him. I think it was the part of me that was afraid to be known or seen in fear of being judged. The part that refused to be crushed by the events, but that would be upset when something was being off around me. My  inner darkness. »

« You felt it too. » she says, catching his hand as he is lowering it.

« Just as you did. » he slowly entangles their fingers, his eyes never leaving hers. « I don’t think the struggle we are facing is the one where we have to turn off part of our darkness to find balance. I think it’s something else. »

Her eyes slowly widen and she turns to look at the symbols over the sacred texts. « I think I get it. Ben ! I think I get the meaning of this ! »

Ben blinks then looks back at the symbols on the page without releasing her fingers.

« I think it means that balance between darkness and light can also emerge when two people who have explored the dark side meet and connect. »

« But… how is that affecting the way to harness the force ? » he asks, visibly confused by her theory.

« Everyone believe that the force is split in two equal parts and that you choose to be on one or the other side. That’s not it. I know my experience is limited and that so is my knowledge, but… what if the force is anchored to our feelings ? What if part of what is powering it toward one side or the other is directly linked to our emotions ? »

He slowly turns his head  to watch her excited face as she looks at the old scriptures.

« Maybe that’s why Luke disconnected from the force after the temple. His guilt would have negativelly fed him and could have caused his fall. »

« Or maybe that his fear of me made him fall in the first place. « Ben states, a bit too coldly.

Rey looks back at him, her eyes softening as she squeezes his hand. « That also explains why I only feel peace when we are connecting. »

His expression slightly changes with that statement to display confusion. She lowers her eyes for a bit then looks back at him. « But it makes sense ? When we are disconnected, I feel empty and almost cold. The others tend to stay away. At first, I thought it was because of that Jedi thing making me different from them. Or because I resumed my bad hermit habits from Jakku. But that’s not it. »

His eyes searches hers, nearly being afraid of understanding what this all means.

« I feel empty and cold, because I need you.  My darkness comes out full force when I am without you. Everything changes when you are near. »

 She lowers her eyes over their mingled fingers, her thumb slowly travelling over his. « Our powers don’t feed each other, Ben. Our feelings do. Powers are consequences, not a cause. From two people who dove into darkness can emerge balance...»

She slowly squeezes his fingers, afraid of having said too much.

« Through love ? » He simply adds, a image of Nervan and Adara flashing in front of his eyes.

She looks up at him and barely nods, her face completely flushed.

_She is perfect…_ he thinks. _So new in all of this, and yet, she sees everything with clarity._

He could give the galaxy and beyond, to that woman, he is certain of it, now. Somehow, he knows she wouldn’t care about something like that… Peace, however, and balance would be suitable gifts for her. Peace within all the realms, balance in everything, and if they are lucky enough, a life beyond that struggle.

A new start. away from everything, when the war finally ends.

He nods as softly as she did, his free hand cupping her cheek and rubbing his thumb over her delicate skin. « I feel it too. »

He doesn’t have to say what… « I know. » She answers before closing the gap between them and scealing their silent admission with a kiss.

* * *

 


	33. the breach

* * *

**Chapter 33 : the breach**

**27 weeks after crait events**

**2 days after the broadcast**

 

**Odessen**

She wishes she had never taken the decision to check  her X-Wing.

Force… why did she do it ?

***

It all started with a few messages from two days ago. The first one from Rose, with an uncertain tone.

« Rey, something came up as you probably know since it has been broadcasted all over the galaxy.  Please, contact us as soon as possible. Leia wishes to speak with you. »

Then, it was a message from Finn, about a standard hour later, the tension in his voice being obvious.  « Rey, this is Finn. Listen, girl we really need you to report as soon as possible. We have a situation here and it’s all turning into a big mess.  We’re waiting for your call. »

After this,Rey was afraid to press the button for the next message but she did it anyway. «  Rey, this is Kaydel Connix. I am calling you on behalf of General Organa who wishes for you to report to base as soon as you get this message. Please let us know of your whereabouts. »

The next one was more alarming. «  Rey !  Damn it girl, where are you ? Listen, I’m trying not to flip out here but with what’s happening, I really need to know you are ok. »

With what’s happening…  but what is happening, really ?

She presses the button for the next message, rubbing her mouth at the same time. « Rey, it’s Poe. I know you’re on your Jedi trip and you probably need to be alone, but we have been asked to call back to base all our forces. This is an emergency.  If you don’t give us a sign of life within the next 36 hours, I’ll input the coordinates of the tracking device from your X-Wing  in the blackbird squadron’s  system and send them on a search party for you. I’m sorry to disturb what is probably important for you, but the fate of the galaxy is at stake. »

Her stomach is churning… this message was sent 12 hours ago…

 Then,there is a last one and her eyes close as soon as she hears the peaceful voice being recorded.

« Hello Rey, this is Leia. I am not certain at this point if you were warned about what happened two days ago. For all we know, you are investigating ruins in a desolate planet … Luke used to do that more often than not. Therefore, you may not be aware of the latests developments regarding the war. Two days ago, Kylo Ren broadcasted a message through the whole galaxy, officializing the rift within the First Order, and asking for alliances in order to take Hux’ forces down. »

Two days ago ? But that’s impossible ! She didn’t leave Ben for a single second for the past few days…

« Rey, it is important for us to have you at our side in those critical moments.  We need your Jedi instinct. » Rey can tell Leia’s voice is hesitant. « In the broadcast, were images of what happened on the Supremacy the day Snoke died. »

She can feel her knees starting to shake. Images ? Images of what ? Of her and Ben fighting together ? Of their talk right after ? How far did it go ?

« I need to talk to you about this and… see if perhaps, you can take part in the negociations between … us and them ?  I will eagerly wait for your return. Be safe and may the force be with you.»

Rey turns off the systems once she has no message left to display, shock being written on her face.

Ben. She needs to get to Ben.

***

**Korriban, Outer Rim**

 

Jelan is sitting on the floor next to the stone under which Graith’s remains are burried. He is once again tampering with an electronic device of his creation, his eyebrow lifting from time to time.

« You were always jealous of him, weren’t you ? »

He takes a screwdriver and works with it on the device, his moves being slow and yet very accurate.

« You had no reason to be. I wouldn’t trade my place for his, even now that the old beast is gone. »

He sets the screwdriver down then takes a small chisel, carving something on the device’s surface.

« He has always been a good master despite everything. It’s sad that you couldn’t see it. »

Jelan takes a deep breath, using the force to guide his hand in a more precise way.

« Power lust brought you here. Power is an illusion, brother. I wish you could have understood that. You were very promising. Hell, even Kira said it. »

« What did I say ? » Kira asks as she comes in the large sanctuary.

« I was talking to Graith about the fact that he could have done great things. »

She nods and flops on the other side of the stone.

« He made his choice as we made ours. » She looks at Jelan then back at the stone. « does it bother you ? »

Jelan remains focused on the carvings he is making with the chisel. « It makes me angry. He wasted his life for nothing.  Snoke would have never put him in charge and we wouldn’t have followed him over Ben. I don’t get how he could fall for that illusion.»

« it’s sometimes easier to believe a lie. He isn’t the first one falling for something like this. »

« Yeah, but in our line of work, it gets us killed. » Jelan sets his tool down and looks at Kira for a good while. « When we say we are going to win over Hux, are we believing a lie ? »

Kira gives him a side look then slightly tilts her head. « No. It just means we believe in Ben. »

Jelan’s lips curve into a smile that he quickly dismisses while looking around. « Right. So… did you manage to contact the master ? I don’t mind plotting on his behalf, but the game is tastier when he is part of it. »

***

**Resistance headquarters**

 

She has prepared herself for this type of reactions and truth to be told, she can’t blame those having them. She is asking their allies to make a complete U-turn in their alliance and philosophically speaking, this is too big for some of them.

« All I am hoping is for you to believe in me. I know what I am asking goes beyond your boundaries, but I am seeing a real oportunity here. »  Leia remains as calm as possible despite feeling an increasing inner frustration that already threatened to make her lose control over her mild use of the force.

« We can’t follow you on that path. We are very sorry general Organa, but our council believes your mind is clouded by your attachment to the current Supreme Leader. »

« This can’t be farther from the truth. Chancelor, we have known each other for many years and… »

« I’m sorry, Leia. This is nothing personal but we refuse to jeopardize our planet’s safety over this. »

Before she can say another word, the holofeed goes dead and Leia flops on her chair in the command center. She puts a hand over her forehead for a bit then takes a soft breath, regaining her composure, aware of the fact that dozens of eyes are currently on her.

« Allright. We lost our allies on Felucia but it’s not a big deal,really. » She looks at the weary officers around her and gives them a smile. « We have been in far worse condition in the past and we survived. »

Kaydel bows her head and tries to give her a reassuring smile, but even her, who believes so much in the wonder that is Leia Organa is being plagued with doubts. What if everyone let them down because of that aliance project with half of the first order ? Said like this,it clearly sounds crazy…

« I need to find Dameron ! » says the general as she stands.

***

**Odessen**

 

Ben keeps his eyes on Rey, his face completely blank as he takes in the information she is currently letting out at a fast pace.

« They are all contacting me about something related to you and that you apparently sent to the whole galaxy, but I know we haven’t left each other for a second so I really need to know what’s going on. » She isn’t looking at him. Her hands are in fists but he knows it isn’t out of anger. She is shaking.

Her voice is trembling too and he really hates the fact that he is responsible for it.

When he remains silent, she raises her eyes and he can see the same kind of unshed tears he had witnessed in her eyes on the Supremacy.

« Ben ? »

The frail sound of her voice, her ragged breathing… even her discheveled state. Everything brings him back to that moment when they parted ways, and  for a second he is terrified at the idea of history repeating itself.

« I didn’t send it. » He says as calmly as he can.

She lets out a breath, her eyes filling with hope.

« But someone did it for me.  Rey… if this message is what I think it is, it means Hux’ coup is in progress.»

She slightly part her lips, her eyes widening in a mix of fear and horror. « I don’t understand. What are you talking about ?»

« Ever since the events on the Supremacy, Hux has been working to overthrone me. It was just a question of time before he decided to try, and he obviously did. I don’t know how, but if my allies activated the message we prepared weeks ago, that means we reached a point of no return.»

« What is in that message ? » She asks, almost weary at the idea of finding out.

« The truth about Hux’ character. His part in the genocide commited through the destruction of the Hosnian system. And what he is currently planning with the building of Starkiller 2. »

Rey’s face turn whiter than snow. « There is another one ? »

« Currently under construction in the unknown regions, yes. Hux had his men harvest a huge amount of Kyber Crystal on Ilum. That’s what gave us the hint that he was plotting something that massive. We’ve been working with several sabotage teams over the past few weeks to delay the building of that weapon and ultimately create flaws to make it explode with the first use. »

« I need to go back to the resistance ! I need to warn them ! We need to do something ! » She sounds like she is panicking, and  Ben takes a step forward, grabbing her shoulders hard enouch to anchor her to reality.

« Rey, listen to me. I am not going to let Hux do what he wants. I am going to have his head. » he eyes search hers and in her hazel orbs, he sees the fear and horror he wishes she would never experience again.

« And if he gets you first ? He has the army behind him, right ? » her body is fully shaking now as some items around them start floating.

Ben squeezes her shoulders harder, his expression turning dominant and nearly feral. « He’s not going to get me first. Do you understand ? »

« You need to hide ! You need to retreat somewhere ! They know you killed Snoke ! They are all going to be after you ! » Her heartbeat gets out of control as the items are being projected around them.

It’s when he sees the tears streaming down her face that he snaps. He pulls her against him and crushes his lips against hers, his arms wrapping almost painfully around her small frame.

She sobs against his lips but returns as much as she can that powerful kiss, as if it was meant to be the last one.

***

**The Finalizer**

 

Hux is less affected than the others by the current ordeal.

As the highest ranking officer on board and self proclamed new Supreme Leader,he is being served food and water despite the drastic rationning existing for the crew, especially for the stormtroopers.

 His quarters air filters have been reinforced and, unlike for the rest of the ship, the athmosphere there  keeps that neutral and nearly sterile scent.

He tends to avoid getting out now, giving his orders and checking the status of the ship through the ship’s intercom.  His delicate nose can’t stand anymore the damp and smelly scent the whole ship is currently harboring caused by a mix of unwashed  bodies a major sewage failure and germs multiplying at an alarming rate.

His mind goes back to the night Snoke fell. Had he been a few minute early, this situation wouldn’t have existed. Ren would be dead and he would be the rightful leader.

The resistance would already  be crushed under his boots instead of going  strong.

How curious, by the way. On the videofeed from that night and that Ren used, he fights with the girl. Not against her.

_That traitor !_ He fumes. _Allied to those filthy rebels !_

He wouldn’t have thought about something like this. Ren after all hunted down his uncle for years and destroyed his own father. He never spoke fondly either about his mother. No, the alliance has to be recent.

_It happened for a reason. There is always a good reason behind any alliance change, especially in time of war._

Hux taps a finger over his chin, his pale blue eyes focused over the void he can see though the duraglass adorning his quarters.

_Ren started losing it after Takodana… after her._

_The girl._

_The girl has an hold over him strong enough to make him go through some drastic changes._

A soft smirk formed over his lips, his eyes slightly narrowing.

_That one is a symbol. The last one of those jedi fanatics. An hope for the weak and pathetic lower beings populating the galaxy._

Hux rolls his neck and makes it crack, his eyes half shutting in delight.

_Getting the girl would at the same time harm Ren, impair the resistance and crush a good amount of faith in better days throughout the universe… Interesting. Very interesting._ He muses, his arms folding and his body taking it’s signature rigid military stance.

Getting the girl will be his priority.

***

**Resistance Headquarters – hangar bay**

 

« Commander Dameron, a word ? » says Leia as she joins Poe in a few decided steps.

Poe, who was talking to the Blackbird leader turns on his heels and gives her his signature grin. « Of course General. »

He turns back toward the officer and nods. « Go ahead and input the coordinates. Keep your communication system open over the widest range of frequencies. With the long distance relays being destroyed, we might have to hook up to some lower communication levels. »

« Sure, Poe. » replies to guy, an obviously rugged man with a lot of flying experience coming among other things from being a pilot for the New Republic for years.

He looks at Leia and nods. « Senator Solo.  »

Leia addresses him a smile then sighs. « I think I haven’t been called like this in years. Glad to see you joined us, Dalrek.»

«  It was the least I could do. » He mumbles with a nod then looks at Poe and turns to go back to his team.

« An old acquaintance ? » inquires Poe as he joins the former princess.

« One of Han’s friends. » She says with a touch of regrets in her voice. « We spent some wonderful evening listening to their old smuggler stories. »

Poe nods and offers his arm, dropping the formalities and leading her away as a relative would. «  It must have been entertaining. »

She smiles and nods, holding his arm and feeling her age at this particular moment. « Poe… » she says, her smile dissolving as fast as it had appeared. « We are losing several allies already. »

«  You knew this would happen. » He says, no real concern showing on his face. « But others will accept it because they will see your point. »

« Perhaps, yes. » She sighs then looks up « if Han was here… »

«  He’d tell you not to dwell on those self righteous people who never faced an actual fight and who rose to power long after the empire was gone ? »

He looks down at her, an eyebrow lifted and as she looks up at him, she can’t help it. She starts laughing. « This is exactly what he would say, adding of course a few derogatory words in the process. »

  Poe smiles at her then nods. « He certainly would do this in shirywook too. »

She gives him a pointed look « he was terrible at pronouncing shirywook  words. » She sighs then shakes her head. « There is some truth in all that. We are currently losing people whom so far haven’t faced the true meaning of war. We are going to need more help… but I think, somehow, this kind of people would be less useful than… »

« Smugglers ? » he cuts, a glint in his eyes.

She stops and looks up at him. « Yes. I once was saved by a smuggler, his furball best friend and a farmboy. I think we need people who think differently. And I don’t care if they do it for money. They can have all the credits of the universe for what I care. What we need is their skills and their loyalty. Do you think you could secure something like that?»

Poe pats her hand. « Give me an X-Wing and I’ll do anything you want. » He says, quoting himself from the day he enrolled by this great lady’s side.

Leia chuckles and nods… A surrogate son, indeed.

 

 ***

**Odessen**

 

This can’t be how it ends between them…

This is what she thinks as she entangles almost painfully her fingers through his hair. She barely feels him lifting her and carrying her to the altar, the only thing registered by her mind being the feeling of his teeth grazing her lips.

He lays her over the obsidian surface and tries to discard the idea of her being set there like an offering to the ancient spirits watching over the temple. His warm breath heats up her face as she pulls his head harder against her in a desperate attempt of remaining locked with him.

This can’t be the end…

Ben climbs on the altar and lays against her, his lips litterally melting against hers. He brings her body tight against him, one of her hands moving down from his hair to do the same with his own body. Her fingers grip tight the fabric of his tunic in a desperate attempt of getting closer.

It’s not enough…

 More items raise and crash against the cave walls, Rey’s abilities being completely out of control. She needs to feel everything about him and is quickly getting frustrated by all the things she considers as artificial between them.

She isn’t the only one. Ben’s hand is already moving between them in the front of her outfit and undoes her belt, his force abilities making up for his lack of visibility. Once he is done with hers, he removes his and in less than a few seconds, Rey’s warm hand is already under his tunic and scratching Ben’s abs.

The sound escaping from his lips is for her utterly satisfying, and as her feeling of sorrow dims, she starts feeling something entirely different.

She knows she is entering some uncharted territories and she gets the feeling he is experiencing the exact same thing.

He releases her lips but immediately attacks her neck, his instinct telling him that she will enjoy this even more. When her body arches against his and her head moves back to give him more room, he knows he made the right choice.

The skin of her neck is soft and warm and under his lips, he can feel her rapid pulse. On instinct, he catches some of her skin in her mouth and sucks over it, her immediate reaction being of digging her nails on his scalp and abs.

« Ben… » she whimpers, and this is more encouragement than he will ever need. His hand pushes her tabart out of the way and dips under her tunic to rub her flat stomach. His breath comes out hot against her neck as he keeps on sucking the flesh trapped between his teeth.

Rey bits her lower lip hard enough to leave marks over it, her heart hammering in her chest. She rolls on her back and pulls him over her, feeling the need of being trapped under him. Her arms wrap as tight as she can around his back and head, her head remaining tilted to enjoy the mix of pleasure and pain coming with what he is doing to her neck.

Ben adjusts her under him, his arms moving up to frame her head as he pulls back to look at her. His ragged breathing assaults her lips,provocking a similar reaction to her, and as their eyes lock, their body synchronize as they always do during their force connections.

Now it makes sense… and for now, there is no fear left in their heart.

Her legs slowly move to lock around his while her hands slowly rub his hair away from his face. His forehead rests against hers, one of his hands moving down to explore the curve of her hip, down to her thigh.

He looks like he is pondering something without being able to make a clear decision and she vaguely understands in that moment that when one of them has doubts, the others will always instinctively develop a clean sense of what needs to happen. With a certainty contrasting her lack of experience, she manages to flip them and comes on top, sitting up to look down at him.

Slowly, she removes her tunic and drops it on the floor, any sense of self consciousness being a million miles away from her mind. Almost reverently, Ben raises his hands over her hips, and then up over her breasts, his thumbs brushing her nipples in soft circles.

Her eyes locked over his face, she proceeds to open his own tunic and remove it from his body. Once she is done,she breaks eyes contact to study his pale chest. Her fingers slowly travel over the scars displayed on his torso.

There is that huge bowcaster shot that probably nearly killed him.  

She bends and covers the scar tissue with soft licks, the taste of his skin instantly giving her goosebumb. Ben rubs her head in slow motion, his eyes drifting shut, lost in the sensation of her tongue tending to his old wound.

Up on his left shoulder, there is another circular mark, caused by a lightsaber. She slowly crawls up, her lips dragging over his skin before settling over the wound. The feeling of her tongue over that particular wound makes him moan, and his fingers entangle in her hair to press her a little more against him.

Once she is satisfied of the sounds she gets from him, she turns her head toward her mark… hers… that one almost scares her. When she gave it to him, her heart was filled with anger and hatred. This, over him, is the sign of her inner darkness. A permanent reminder of who she truly is.

She moves her head closer and gives a hard and slow lick over the huge cut adorning his shoulder, collarbone and neck. She crawls on top of him even more, her breasts now rubbing over his chest, and Ben’s arm wrap around her waist to press her tightly against him.

She raises her head and whispers against his ear, her whole body instinctively rubbing against his. « I’m sorry. I didn’t know… I didn’t understand… »

He wraps both arms around her and rolls them fast, settling between her legs once again. When he kneels up, she momentarily feels abandoned, but the look in his eyes tells her that she can’t be farther from the truth.

His hands find her waistband and slowly, he divers her from her pants and undergarments. He then takes one of her ankles and lifts it to his mouth, observing  the reactions he is certain to provoke in her.

There… now she feels it.

**_There is passion, yet there is peace_ **

 His hand slowly move up to her knee then her thigh as he lays back on top of her, his free hand quickly opening and lowering his pants. As he settles on top of her,  his legs move to get rid of the last of his clothes.

There he is… bare against her, with nothing coming in their way.

Rey feels an unfamiliar hardness against her stomach, and if she doesn’t break eyes contact with him, she instinctively knows what it means. She never considered something like this before, but now, she is more than ready for it.

They remain frozen like this for a moment, their eyes connected, their bond fully open, their breathing synchronized as well as their heartbeat.

They don’t think. They can’t. They only feel and this is what matters, ultimately.

Slowly she lowers one of her hands between them and grabs him. Her lips curve into a smile when he gasps then puts his forehead against her shoulder. She turns her head against his and whispers, squeezing him gently.

« I need you. » 

That single sentence makes him groan and thrust in her small hand. He slowly replaces her hand with his and positions himself at her opening.

He knows he has to be careful. He gets the feeling she probably never experienced this kind of encounter. His always were mechanical with meaningless persons sent to him by Snoke. He never cared for any of them…

But this is Rey. His Rey, he now realizes.

Rubbing himself at her opening, he is almost shocked to feel her ready to welcome him and this is almost too much for him. In a swift move, he enters her, his whole body shaking against her.

She immediately throws her head back and arches against him, her arms wrapping tight around his back and her nails digging in his skin.

**_There is strength, yet serenity._ **

Ben remains still, his face burried against her neck as if to wait for any sign of discomfort from her.

Rey catches her breath, her heart racing at an alarming rate, just like his. « Please… » She whimpers, her legs wrapping tight around him.

How could this happen so fast and so easily ? He doesn’t have the time to fully register his own question as he pulls back and sets a strong and steady rythm that she perfectly matches with her hips.

« Rey… » he moans against her neck, his teeth catching some skin there once again. She arches even more and screams softly, the feeling of his teeth combined with him rubbing her most sensitive spot being nearly too much for her.

**_There is power, yet harmony._ **

Her reactions are enticing. Through their bond, he feels all that she feels, setting each and every nerve of his body on fire. His thrusts become more frantic, his hands lowering to grab her hips. The music escaping from her lips grows only louder and echoes in the cave in a very sinful way.

With each snap of her hips, he answers with a matching thrust, as if they had perfected that dance for years instead of this being their first time together.

**_There is chaos, yet order._ **

He feels the skin of his back break and welcomes the pain with harder moves, her mouth opening wide to let out her screams of pleasure. Her hands lower over his butt and she pulls him harder against her, the only thing mattering to her right now being his pleasure and hers combined as one.

**_There is no life without death._ **

His hips snap against hers at a fast pace, his own screams of pleasure fueling her as hers are fueling his. She digs her nails in his flesh once again, her legs on each side of the altar to offer herself completely to him.

This is more than he can take and as he plunges himself in her a final time before achieving his release, he feels her coming undone around him. Their combined scream fill completely the cave before they both collapse, motionless over the altar.

**_I see the balance and through it the force shall guide me._ **

Rey finally wraps her legs around his, her hands moving up to rub his hair in a soothing way. She refuses to open her eyes or to even reactivate her thoughts. All she feels is him. All she wants to know is him.

Her Ben.

He remains motionless on top of her, using the force to avoid crushing her small frame but resting over her enough to give her the comfort she gets from feeling his weight over her.

 This should never have to end…

***

**Resistance headquarters, reformed Stormtrooper’s training department.**

 

Rose is keeping a detailed record of the training session Finn initiated in order to detect the bests among the stormtroopers they extracted.

As Finn twirls his staff and lowers it in front of his oponent, he keeps track of the way the other guy is setting his eyes on him. From this, he deduces his next move and jumps away before lowering himself and swipping the guy’s legs with his weapon.

He stands and nods. « Always be careful of your reactions. Stormtroopers wear masks, which means their oponents can’t predict their move by keeping track of their facial reactions. Here, you have no mask. You are bare.»

The guy nods and stands, joining back the group Finn is currently training.

 « Ok guys, enough for tonight. Good job everyone and get some rest, you’ll need it for tomorrow’s session. »

He nods at the guys and very few girls who walk past him to exit the training area then joins Rose, flopping next to her and putting his head against her shoulder.

She giggles and kisses the top of his head  then goes back to filling the record with what she observed. « Tired ? »

« Yeah… It’s difficult to make them lose the reflexes they got through conditioning. If we want to make them efficient against some stormtroopers, we need to make sure they no longer fight like them. There would be no element of surprise otherwise.»

He wraps his arms around her waist and makes himself comfortable.

« I’m nearly done. » She says, resting her head on top of his. « I’ll let you see what I have written tomorrow. Tonight, I want you to rest. »

« Difficult to rest when there is so much to do. » He mumbles.

« Or when you are upset, hmmm ? » She sets the holopad next to her on the floor and cuddles against him. « I understand, you know ? The idea of being allied to this guy is creepy. »

« It’s not just that, Rose. » He says, looking straight in front of him. « You’ve seen the broadcast, right ? What was Rey doing with this guy ? »

Rose sighs but doesn’t answer because she frankly doesn’t know what to think about that.

«  She has changed. She hasn’t been herself since Ahch-To. And I know it’s not that Jedi thing. I mean, I know Skywalker was a bit of a crazy hermit but you don’t become like that in a matter of days… Something happened to her, and seeing her with that monster when she was supposed to be in Jedi training… I think the prospect of what is making her different is scary. »

« You think that’s his doing. » she says, her voice deadly calm.

« I think she hides something huge from us and as long as she doesn’t give explanation, as much as I hate that idea, we should be careful around her. » He grits his teeth for good measure then nods and sits up, looking at his girlfriend.

« Come on, babe, lets go back to our quarters. This floor is anything but comfortable. » he adds,  relaxing a little for the sake of not worrying her too much.

She gives him a reasuring smile and starts picking up their things.

***

**Odessen, a few hours later**

 

At some point, they joined  Ben’s Tie-Silencer and as he suspected, a record of the broadcast was waiting for him.

They both watched it in silence, Rey curled on his lap because of the lack of space in that ship and him resting his head against hers.

There it was, the point of no return.

He might not make it out alive. At the time of the recording, a few weeks back, he had been at peace with this idea.

But not anymore.

Then came that horrible moment both dreaded where they had to gather their things and secure them in their own ship.

Ben joins her X-Wing with the holocron in his hand and waits for her to jump down and join him, which she does almost immediately.

She instinctively finds her way in his arms and wraps hers around his waist as her face burries against his chest.

_I don’t want to go._ She whispers through the bond.

_Me neither_ he replies in the same way, his arms wrapping tight around her.

They wish time could stand still but the Universe isn’t that accommodating.

After a while, Ben pulls back and cups her face with his free hand, looking down at her with a mix of longing and sadness. « No matter what happens… » 

She looks up at him, her eyes already filling with tears. « I feel it too. » She cuts him before he can say it for if he does, she knows she won’t be able to let go.

He slightly nods and lowers his eyes. « Keep the holocron with you. Even if you can’t open it, I’ll feel better if I know the knowledge it contains is with you. »

She nods, her chest constricting and her eyes dropping over their hands as he is placing the device in her palm. « We’ll open it together, the next time we see each other. »

« Rey… »

She looks up at him and gives him a sad smile, tears falling. « We’ll see each other again. It’s not a belief. It’s our future. »

He doesn’t have the heart to tell her that their vision is a possible future among others. Instead, he puts his forehead against hers and sways her gently. « Of course. » he whispers, his voice slightly trembling like on that fateful night when they parted on the Supremacy. « Once it’s over… once we are done with all this… i’ll come back for you, sweetheart. I promise. »

* * *

 


	34. Truths

* * *

**Chapter 34 : Truths**

**27 weeks after crait events**

**4 days after the broadcast**

 

 ***

**Korriban, Outer Rim**

 

Home.

Him and his knights designated that planet as such as soon as they landed on it 6 years ago after the destruction of the Jedi temple.

It seemed like the only reasonable option at the time.

Now, Ben sees home for what it is : a very inhospitable environment looking more like a place of chaos than anything else.

…

 

Kira enters the main space of the Sith temple, only to find her companions engaged in various activities, but all having the same goal. Killing time and remaining centered until Ben’s return.

None of them talk about it, but each one of them knows that they all experience the same thing. They have been there before, 6 years ago, united around the same goal and yet, waiting for guidance.

« Have you felt it ? » She says, her calm tone contrasting with the inner turmoil going with the incredible feeling of anticipation she is currently experiencing.

Jelan instantly breaks his meditative state and nods. « He hit atmosphere. »

« He made it to us. » Whispers Adara while standing and adjusting her clothes.

«  And hopefully unharmed. » adds Nervan, standing and joining Kira.

« I’m going out to welcome him. » Daine already crosses the main space and heads toward the exit, the marks from his unpleasant encounters on the Finalizer still visible but consistently healing.

Kira shuts her eyes and briefly projects a silent prayer to the ancient dark users celebrated in that temple as a thank you for allowing Ben to return to them.

« Lets get things in order. » she says next. «  He’s certainly going to want to take some immediate actions. »

***

Daine emerges from the facility just as Ben leaves the safety of his cockpit.

The knight comes closer then bends a knee to the ground once he is close enough, his head bowing. « Master. »

Ben turns and looks at his kneeling knight.

Not so long ago, that simple action would have looked normal. It was Snoke’s wish to create an order with its own set of traditions as a way of enforcing power and distance between the actual ruler and his followers. That fact was carved into Kylo Ren’s brain.

Except Kylo Ren was now missing in action.

Oh he wasn’t dead yet. This one wouldn’t fall that easily. But he was severely impaired just because of the power held within a set of beautiful hazel eyes.

« Rise and don’t do this again, Daine. Snoke is gone and Hux is no longer in our midst. We can drop the pretence. It’s time to do something else. Pass the words to the others. We have some serious work to do.»

Daine stands and considers his master for a bit. « Come, they are all waiting for your return. »

Ben nods and walks past him, eager to enter the facility to get things started.

He knows that winning this war will be the only way he can  truly be reunited with Rey.

***

**Meanwhile, in Resistance headquarters**

« Are you listening to me ? » says Rose in a light tone as she is walking to the storage rooms with Rey.

This startles Rey enough. «  What ? » the Jedi shakes her head after a bit and smiles. « Oh, um… yes. Sorry, i’m still a bit tired from the trip home. »

Rose rolls her eyes and elbows her in the ribs. « That’s ok ! X-Wings and hyperspace aren’t the best combo for a peaceful and relaxing trip.»

« Tell me about it. » Mumbles Rey who is well aware of the fact that in a normal situation, her ship would have been reformed long ago.

Rose grabs her arm and grins. « You never told me where you decided to go. »

« Oh I had no particular plans. » She lies, her eyes lowered as she walks. « I thought about Ahch-To for a bit but figured there was  nothing left for me there. So I decided to let the force guide me. »

« The Force can do that ? »

« I’m not sure.» She says, uneasy. « I don’t exactly know what’s going on with that thing in me, Rose.» At least, that part is true, she thinks with some mild satisfaction.

« Does it scare you ? »

Does it scare her… it used to, yes,  but not anymore. Ben has seen to that.

She looks at the maintenance worker as Rose squeezes Rey’s arms, misinterpreting her silence. « It’s going to be fine, you know ? I know none of us are like you, but we are your friends and we can support you. »

Support her… would they, knowing who her guide and now lover is ?

Lover… somehow she is registering this idea in full for the first time.

Ben and her.

Ben…

She is zoning out again, wondering where he is, what he does, if he is safe, if he is already being tracked down by that mad general, if…

« Rey ? you’re doing it again, girl ! »

Rey gives her an apologetic smile. « Do you mind if I return to my quarters for now ? I promise, I’ll help you sorting out those crates later but for now, I don’t feel so good. ». She puts a hand over her forehead for good measure, partly cursing herself for her behavior.

Rose squeezes her arm then lets go of it, remaining her cheery self despite her growing worry. « Not at all. Get some rest and if you don’t feel better after that, go and see the doc, ok ?»

« I will. » Rey gives her a weak smile then walks away, rubbing her arms in the process.

***

**The Finalizer**

Hux walks at a fast pace through the halls separating his quarters from the hangar bay. Holding a tissue against his nose and mouth, he tries to ignore the stench that literally invaded each corner of the vessel. The blood injecting his eyes however shows that this quest is vain and that the general is currently experiencing another one of his angry outbursts. 

He finally reaches his destination and a fresh wave of anger assaults him as he sees most of the facility still sustaining heavy damages.

_It’s a wonder the plasma shields remained up to avoid sucking everything into the void_ , he thinks bitterly.

He will personally make this fanatic pay for destroying the marvelous piece of engineering that is the Finalizer. Losing the Supremacy was one thing. Its size was making it a powerful symbol of the First Order’s domination over the galaxy. But it was Snoke’s ship, not his.

This was the Finalizer. His own scepter of power.

He stomps to the only ship in flying condition and glares at the engineering team still working on it.

« I want to know the status of this shuttle. » He barks, momentarily lowering his tissue.

The leader of that team steps forward and bows his head. « We are currently checking the pressurizing mechanism to make sure it won’t fail as soon as the ship enters hyperspace. »

« How long until we can safely use it ? » Asks Hux in a disdainful voice, irritated by the unkempt look of that team. How their leader can be so lenient is beyond him. He will see to punish that man for this once the ordeal with the Finalizer is over because for him, the value of a team shows through crisis, and in the First Order, in his own version, no imperfection can be tolerated!

« We’ll need another 3 hours of work to be certain of it’s perfect condition, then it will be good to go, sir. »

Hux turns on his heels and sets his eyes over the ensign following him everywhere each time he exits his quarters. « I want our best pilot available on the ship as well as an escort of 15 of our finests stormtroopers. I’ll board personally on that vessel. Have it restocked with rations and water.»

The ensign nods, his Adam apple bobbing as his eyes momentarily meet Hux’s blood injected orbs.

« Yes, Sir. » He answers, his body going completely rigid, his left palm hitting his right shoulder as he makes military salute Hux has decided to create for his own version of the First Order.

Hux’s nostrils flare a little and the ensign quickly lowers his eyes over Hux’ cupid bow, unable to hold his superior’s gaze any longer.

***

**Korriban, Outer Rim**

 

It’s like the first time, really.

_Are we going back to the start ?_ wonders Ben as he looks at his companions once he enters the main space.

Kira turns and on her face he clearly can read relief and determination. She hasn’t changed.

Behind her is Nervan that Adara instinctively joins. Both finding each other’s hand without watching. Does it looks like this when he is around Rey ?

Jelan comes closer and bows his head, but as they all make a move to kneel, Daine enters the main space.

« No, this is no longer necessary. » He walks past Ben and looks at him.

Ben answers with a nod then looks at his five knights, motioning toward a large stone table probably built there when the Sith temple was erected. Ancient, it still looked in perfect condition as if the centuries had no grasp over this particular part of the temple.

All five settled over their stone chair, with Ben taking place in the one at the head of the table. His hands rest over the table and he looks at them for a good while, trying to find the right words.

« Kylo ? »Kira tries in a tone way too calm to be natural.

« This is not who I am. » The words flow out of his mouth with a very disconcerting ease and somehow, any concern he could have had regarding what he is revealing, vanishes.

Kira looks briefly at the four others then back at Ben.

« We all know who I am. » He goes on, only raising his eyes as he looks at them. « Kylo Ren is Snoke’s creation, and Snoke is gone. »

Adara can’t help it, she smiles, her hand finding Nervan’s knee under the table.

Ben looks up then away, clearly searching for the right thing to say but somehow, he knows that any explanation will remain imperfect.

« As you are well aware, the resistance has among its ranks someone being force sensitive. »

« Yeah, the scavenger from Jakku who had the map, right ? » answers Jelan with an eyebrow lifted.

« Her name is Rey. » cuts Ben, with some mild annoyance before going back to his pondering state. « She has been raised on Jakku and was a scavenger, yes. But she is much more than this and she is becoming a powerful force user. She is a natural.»

«  Do you want to recruit her to replace Graith? » asks Daine, mildly confused by the apparent uncertainty in their master’s tone.

Ben laughs at that comment for a while and all five of them are almost shocked to hear this. 

« Rey would never accept to be recruited. She is the kind of woman that goes where she wants to go and this is where her strength lays. She is her own mistress and only follows her own beliefs. »

« Then what ? » asks Nervan, rubbing Adara’s hand slowly under the table.

Before Ben can articulate an answer, a soft tone cuts the conversation. « Is she your chosen ? »

Ben fully raises his head and looks at her, taking a deep breath. She answers by giving him a reassuring smile and he simply nods, Nervan, Daine and Jelan looking shocked.

« So this is how it evolved. » Adds Kira in a serious tone. « I thought it might come down to this when you talked to me about her and that bond you share. »

« A bond ? What bond ? » The quick question snapping out of Nervan’s mouth immediately attract the others‘ attention just as Adara squeezes his hand a bit tighter.

« Rey and I are force bonded.  I believe it first happened on Starkiller and it has never stopped.»

« You mean, you can communicate through telepathy with her ? » asks Adara in a way showing that she knows exactly what she is talking about.

« No it goes beyond that. We can see each other’s projection and we can also manage to create ways to physically connect through a distance. »

« And you can do this without draining your lifeforce ? » adds the female knight, awe in her voice.

« Apparently, we can, yes. Neither of us is affected. Anyway, now is not the time to get technical with this.  I simply need you all to know that her and I are tightly linked despite her being with the Resistance and me being Supreme Leader. Which leads me to the current matter which is crushing Hux’ rebellion. Daine, what kind of information did you gather before leaving the Finalizer ?»

« There have been many interesting factors. The main one comes from right after the beginning of the broadcast. Hux obviously panicked and had all the long distance relays taken down to try and cut our message before it could reach the whole galaxy.»

« You were right. Hosnian Prime’s fate was a political aberration that potentially antagonized a good portion of the galaxy against Snoke. Associating Hux with this genocide while showing your disapproval of it  caused several important defections among his ranks at our benefit. » adds Jelan with a nod.

« Among the smugglers, some naturally contacted me to tell me they would support us, as long as we promise to go on with the fight until Hux is taken down. » says Kira, her eyes  remaining glued on Ben’s face. She knows the next thing she has to say might be difficult for him to handle.

« Anything else, Daine ? » asks Ben as he looks at Hux’ former shadow.

« Yes, I sabotaged the Finalizer and all its shuttles before leaving, which means, Hux is probably still drifting around Mustafar as we speak. He couldn’t make long distance calls for help with his little stunt with the relays. » Daine wiggles his eyebrows then leans back, the idea of Hux still upset about what he did being more than satisfying for him.

Ben nods then looks at Jelan « What about you on Naboo? »

« He is probably planning on setting his power center in Theed as a symbol against you. The force suppressant technology is being tested in the palace. I don’t know how it works. I wasn’t able to get close to this without being affected. »

« We need someone to steal the plans for us. » Replies Ben as he looks at Kira.

« I’ll activate a few contacts and see what they can do about it. » she nods then puts a palm flat over the table, looking at it intently. « Speaking of contacts, there is something important you need to know. »

His head slightly tilts. Kira isn’t usually one to take precautions before speaking about difficult matters. That would be more Adara. « What is it ? »

She wets her lips and takes a big breath before looking at him straight in the eyes. «I have been contacted by commander Dameron from the resistance. He asked me if I could find a way to pass a message to the current Supreme Leader of the First Order. I told him I would through my smuggling connections. General Organa is willing to talk about an alliance to take Hux down. »

Ben stands and rubs a hand over his mouth, shock written over his face. In a heartbeat, he is out of the room, desperately needing to  be out in the open, despite the unwelcoming setting of the whole planet.

***

**Resistance Headquarters**

**Rey’s private quarters**

She locked herself in her quarters as soon as she entered them and slid against the door without even thinking about making herself comfortable.

Holding her legs against her, she looks straight in front of her, each breath she is taking putting a distance between the last moment he held her and now. She felt the excruciating pain of their separation from the moment they each boarded their ship to leave Odessen and she can’t get rid of this feeling or even try to dim it.

He is all she sees… all she can think about. She feels the phantom of his touch on her skin and she sometimes hears his voice even if she knows it’s just an hallucination.

She is aware of the strange looks some of the resistance members are giving her but she can’t bring herself to pretend she is normal. Nothing of what she endures can allow her to find this strength in her.

She feels like there is only half of her here and that the other half is still with him, somewhere.

She shuts her eyes, another wave of pain making her chest constrict as she can’t bear thinking they are millions of lightyears away from each other.

She tries not to cry. That’s all she can do, but this is a battle she has more and more troubles winning as the hours go by. She feels the tears burning in her eyes and her hands moves in fists around her knees.

She misses the appearance of the familiar blue form in front of her. Qui-Gon’s eyes are filled with compassion as he kneels then settles at her level.

« Rey. » he softly says.

Her eyes bolt open and she takes a ragged breath, cursing herself for letting the tears fall. She spots him through her tears and drops her hands next to her on the floor.

« Rey, I know the pain is excruciating, but you have to find the strength in you to go on without him in your environment. »

« I don’t know how. » she answers, her voice trembling. « I can’t. it’s too difficult. »

« It is difficult. Not impossible. » he gives her a soft smile, the lines around  his eyes making him look at the same time wiser and softer. « The bond you share with him has been fuelled by your intimacy. It brought you closer to him, and farther away from the rest of the universe.»

« How do you know ? I mean… for us ?» she wipes her cheeks again, wishing she could see him more than through the blur of her tears.

« In the same way I know you are force bonded. This is the will of the force. »

« The will of the force !  if it has a will then why doesn’t it stop the war so we can be off with everything and stay safely together ? » She is fully sobbing like a child now and Qui-Gon wishes he could  pet her hair to try and make her feel better.

« This is not how it works. » he says in a fatherly tone. « The force has a will and can guide selected people toward a certain path, but it can’t make them walk that path. They have to do it on their own with all the risks it contains. » he addresses her another sad smile that she can’t see as she is crying too hard.

« A long time ago, I lost a battle that ultimately left a wonderful young man who hadn’t finished his training in charge of a boy with an uncommon and yet flawed inner strength. I tripped on my path out of fear of losing my padawan at the hand of a powerful Sith and it ruined everything. » Qui-Gon joins his hands in front of him, his eyes slightly lowering.

« Anakin, that wonderful and ressourceful boy needed a father figure… he gained a brother instead. One he ended up competing with, which allowed him to stray from his training, and  ultimately led him toward the dark side. »

Rey wipes her cheeks again, her head resting against the wall behind her. « I don’t understand what you are trying to tell me. »

Qui-Gon nods, his eyes finally meeting her in full. « The Force does not make decisions for you. It just allows connections. But what you make of them is your doing alone. Rey, you need to ask yourself what you need and what Ben needs right now.  Your bond makes you one, but you are also two separate beings in two separate corners of the universe. You have to live through those events, somehow until you are able to being reunited. »

She takes a hard breath, her eyes red but her tears slowing down.

« How ? » She whispers, her voice still trembling.

« The choice will be yours… but would you rather wait in that excruciating state of despair, or will you try to take action in order to set events in motion ? »

Something then clicks in her mind _…_

_I know all about waiting_ …

And waiting never led her anywhere. She briefly has a flash of her AT-AT wall… one scratch per day spent on the wasteland known as Jakku, with no one ever coming back.

She hears Maz’s distant voice again… _The belonging you seek is not behind you, it is ahead._

She can no longer be the one waiting. This never worked for her.

She knows what she has to do.

***

**Korriban, Outer Rim**

**Naga Sadow Mausoleum**

 

The trip through the Dark Lords Valley is a silent one, despite the creepiness going with walking in the middle of some ancient powerful Sith remains. Ben can feel the call coming from some of them but he chooses to stops in front of Naga Sadow’s mausoleum, maybe because despite its age, it is still well preserved.

He wishes his mind could be blank. Hell he wishes he could feel nothing right now, but reality is different.

How could she want that after all he has done? How could she ever consider entering negotiations with him in the first place? How could she, when he killed his own father and the only love she ever had?

His eyes turn cold, his teeth slightly gritting.

Unless this is again the general or the senator acting and not the actual woman?

Is that it?

Ben takes several hard breaths and as he is about to release some pent up energy, his eyes catch a flash of blue next to him. He turns his head and sees a familiar face… the male force ghost from Odessen.

« What are you doing here? » Asks Ben in a low and disincarnated tone.

« I’ve been here before. » says the man as he looks around. « I was searching for datas about something known as the Star Forge.»

« I’ve never heard about it. » The coldness in Ben’s voice is nearly overwhelming as he feels the energy gather around him.

The force ghost nods «It was an ancient Shipyard, fully automated and powered half by a star and half by the Force. I ultimately destroyed it when I returned to the light. But not before causing a huge amount of pain out of my need for controlling chaos. The path you took is one I walked before you.»

«   Are you here to save my soul ? » says Ben, disdain in his voice and anger filling his eyes.

« No, I am here to remind you what really counts, ultimately. » The force ghost looks at him intently. « You have a chosen, just as I had. You would have never been able to reach our holocron without being deeply united with that Jedi woman. »

« I could have made it float. » replies Ben, his voice taunting.

« Not on your own, no. And not without unity either. This is how Bastila and I set things up to gather this artefact and to open it. »

Ben’s eyes narrow, something clicking in his mind. « Bastila ? Bastila Shan ? »

The force ghost looks toward the horizon and nods « The woman who saved me in all the ways possible. The only one who made things worth trying. I am certain you know what I am talking about.»

« So you are… »

« Who I am is just a name lost in time and space, Ben Solo. What truly matters is that not so long ago, you reached a crossroad. From the path you will take after this depends the fate of the whole galaxy. »

The force ghost turns and looks at him intentely, Ben’s face now reflecting a mix of confusion and fear. « Will you let the past be your guide, or will you allow your future to step in to help you fullfill your destiny ?»

« The only people I have known talking about destiny were darksiders. » Cuts Ben, his breathing a bit shallow.

« This is true, because unlike the lightsiders, they were always trying to see beyond to build another world.  Passion sets things in motion. Peace leads you to become unmoving. »

« Darth Revan, that was your name. »

« I was also Revan, the Jedi turned Sith that Bastila pulled back toward the light, without fully putting the darkness to sleep. »

« Rey can’t pull me back toward the light. » says Ben in a low voice.

« Doubts. Fear. There is no truth in what you are saying. It has already started for her as well as for you. »

Rey… He has to think of Rey. He has to fully let the past die if he wants to give her a chance to live what she is hoping to live.  

« Choose your destiny wisely, Ben Solo for it will affect her as much as it will affect you.  This is the burden those sharing a force bond have to carry. »

***

**Resistance headquarters, reformed Stormtrooper’s training department.**

Rose enters the training room at the end of the fighting lesson and goes straight to Finn. She moves on the tip of her toes and whispers something in his ear, grabbing his arm with both hands in the process.

He pulls back and looks at her with questioning eyes then frowns and kisses her forehead.

« Thank you for warning me, my angel. I’ll look into it. »

* * *

 


	35. This is war

* * *

**Chapter 35 : This is war**

**30 weeks after crait events**

**3 weeks after the broadcast**

 

*******

**Resistance headquarters**

**Main conference room**

« I have observed her. She isn’t herself anymore. » Arms crossed, Finn leans against one of the tables, his eyes meeting Poe’s.

« Do you think she has turned ? » Asks the pilot, his eyes piercing.

Chewie suddenly steps in and emits a series of  offended growls hiding very little of what he thinks of that accusation.

Poe raises both hands « I’m just trying to understand what Finn means, Chewie. »

Finn rubs his face then looks up. « That’s not the Rey I met on Jakku. That’s not the girl I ran away with and who talked me out of defecting back on Takodana. » 

« She is a Jedi. » Leia’s quiet and peaceful voice instantly make the tension come down in the room as all eyes turn toward her. « A Jedi with no guide, discovering things little by little. »

« And a Jedi who sided Kylo Ren after Snoke was defeated. » remarks Poe. « has anyone talked to her about that ? »

Finn shakes his head and so does Rose. Chewie emits another serie of howling sounds, this time quieter before looking at Leia.

« She asked you to trust her and you did. There is nothing wrong with that. She is like Luke. We couldn’t always understand his choices but each and every one of them made sense in the end. »

Poe comes closer and sits next to Leia, looking at her intently. « Leia, you know that I deeply respect your ideas, but, right now, aren’t you being influenced by the memories of your brother ? »

The look she gives him is full of a mix of compassion, motherly love and  an underlying hint of mischief. « of course that I am being influenced by the memories of my brother ! This is exactly what prevents me from doubting her like you all do. Poe, she is another type of being and she is lonely. Very lonely because the Jedi way is a solitary path filled with self sacrifice. No one can understand what she goes through, except another Jedi, and you know that they are becoming a rarity in the galaxy.  Rey is a beautiful young woman carrying a burden far too heavy for her young frame and she reacts in the best way she can. »

Poe makes a face and rubs the back of his own head as he clears his throat. « Well that’s a way of making us feel one inch tall, General. »

« That’s my job, Commander. » she answers, patting his hand a little before looking at the others. « I will stand by my choice. I want Rey to be our ambassador to treat with the First Order. »

Finn goes to open his mouth but is quickly stopped by Leia’s raising hand. « And yes, I am well aware of the fact that something happened on the Supremacy. What ? I don’t know and you don’t know either. The only thing I see is that at some point, she was able to negociate a truce with Kylo Ren when all the odds were against her and for me, that means something. »

Finn sighs then nods, any further discussion being useless. He knows that soon, he’ll have to talk to Rey.

***

**Resistance headquarters – Main training facility**

Meditating is not something she does too often anymore, because it invariably brings her back to the emptiness rooting in her chest.

She kills it by overtraining herself.

The silence of the bond she shares with Ben is a constant threat upon her sanity, but she knows from the reports the resistance keeps getting that he is currently facing some major troubles, as a full out war is now on between his version of the First Order and Hux’.

Getting stronger… Faster… this is all she thinks about as she waves her lightsaber above her head then engages into one of the traditional Jedi forms no living master will ever be able to show her.

Fortunately, She gets regular visits from Qui-Gon who, probably against all the rules, sometimes brings her what she needs. This is how she located an ancient holocron displaying the seven traditional forms of lightsaber duelling in one of the crates filled with Luke’s belongings.

She isn’t particularly fond of Shii-Cho and Makashi even if she nailed them in no time.  She finds Soresu useless to her but there is one naturally fitting her. The first time she analyzed Ataru, it was like meeting an old friend again.

After this, she tried Shien, but quickly stopped because it reminded her too much of Ben. She decided to leave Juyo out after Qui-Gon warned her about the inner darkness this combat skill was feeding from. This one she will learn with Ben, someday, when everything is over.

She increases her speed, having memorized each of the Ataru’s movements in order to perfect them.

This is what she has to do : train herself in order to be able to join Ben and fight by his side when the time comes.

No matter what happens, no matter how the stars will be aligned, she is certain of one thing only: she will protect his life with hers if she has to.

***

**Resurgent-Class Subjugator -Main Bridge**

All the alarms are beeping as the Subjugator makes an avoidance manœuvre, all the shields being powered up toward the front of the ship.

« Sir, the Anihilator apparently lost control of its navigation system. » says one of the communication officers, one hand pressed over his ear as he receives loud messages from their fleet.

Ben gives a side look to the two masked knights still with him on the ship. Jelan nods and comes close to the console, looking at the communication officer. « I’ll take over. »

The officer quickly stands and leaves his seat to the knight, still not used to being commanded by people he is used to fear.

Ben comes close to the pilot, his eyes on the duraglass bay. « Still no sign of the Finalizer ? »

« No sir.  There are 4 resurgent-class  but none of them is the Finalizer.»

Ben’s lip slightly twitch. Hux is letting his allies fight his own war. What else could he expect from someone who earned his position by deceit ?

Jelan presses three buttons from the console « Resurgent-Class Anihilator, this is  Dekar Ren, knight of our supreme leader. Your system has been corrupted. Disengage everything and switch to life support. We’ll cover you.»

Ben’s voice comes out calm despite the darkness tainting it. « Power up the battle stations. All aims toward the two closest ships.» His eyes settles on the Anihilator, and once he sees all the lights vanish, he quickly nods. «Fire.» 

He watches as the first ressurgent class raises in full his front shields while the second one tries to make an avoidance manœuvre.

« Send the Tie-Fighters at a close range in reverse behind the shield and aime at their battle stations. » Ben’s fingers tap on the console slowly as he opens himself to the force around him.

_Hux can’t be far._ He thinks as he narrows his eyes.

« Sir, the Tie-Fighters will be taken down before they can close in on their target. » the pilot grits his teeth, fully aware of the mistake he probably just made. Somehow, he is still breathing, thought.

« That’s why we are going to head toward the first ship, head front. While they try to avoid the colision, the Tie-Fighters will do the job. » Ben looks at him, the pilot instantly sending out the orders.

As the engines are being pushed, the Subjugator starts its course toward the closest ship, the Anihilator ending behind him.

« Resurgent-Class Anihilator, reboot your system and revert to construction site settings. Send your engineering team to check the data core and confine the corrupted sectors. » Says Jelan after pressing two buttons in order to send more datas to the ship he is currently trying to save. He then stands and joins Ben.

« I gave the procedure to stabilize the Anihilator but I need to go on board to see what exactly corrupted its navigation system. »

Ben nods, his eyes remaining over the closest oposing ship. « Get on board and take the lead. »

Jelan nods and quickly leaves the bridge, the last knight getting closer and standing next to Ben.

Kira keeps her eyes on the ship in front of them and immediately notice the first signs of the standard avoidance manœuvre. She knows what goes with it. First, the KDY destroyer ion engines are powered at half capacity to give a propulsion boost while the navigation system sets an oblique course. Then as the ship starts drifting, the KDY destroyer ion engines are shut down to be replaced by the gemon-8 ion engines, pushed in reverse at full capacity.

This gives the perfect opening while the ship is fighting inertia. It’s a small window, really… but one big enough for the Tie-Fighters to do some serious damages.

Kira turns her head and spots the small smirk forming on Ben’s lips. He is anticipating the same thing as her and when it actually happens, she can see the satisfaction in his eyes.

« All battle stations engaged toward target number two. Fire. » He simply says, an armageddon of laser bolts hitting the second ships’s shield while the first one sustains serious damages as it keeps drifting.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« I was under the impression that the little alterations you managed to inject in the Anihilator were supposed to make a difference. Yet, what do I see ? » Says Hux, his voice ice cold despite his apparent calm. « Not only did it take shelter behind the Subjugator, but on top of it, the Subjugator is currently damaging the Destructor’s shield after putting the Revelator in a delicate position. »

The Engineer holds himself as straight as he can, his hands poised to his side and his nose up. « The alterations didn’t have the time to fully spread. Apparently, someone had the idea of shutting down the system before the diffusion became  critical. »

« Must I think about everything on my own ? Did it not occur to you to make the alterations effectives once they have spread enough to cause a massive system failure?» replies Hux with a hint of bitterness as he watches the  Revelator drift until it hits the athmosphere of the nearby planet at a weird angle.

He knows what will comes next. Part of the ship is going to burn while entering athmosphere, most of the system will be in critical overload, and the remains will end up crashing on the planet’s surface. He already sees the firsts escape pods leave the side of the condemned war vessel.

The engineer’s throat tightens, understanding that this mistake will not be left unpunished.

« Guards, arrest the head engineer for high treason. His fate will be decided later. »

« But ! Sir! » says the man, shocked by the accusation. « I have never betrayed… » As he is dragged away by two stormtroopers, he tries to claim his innocence, but Hux is already reaching the communication console.

« Link me to the Destructor. »

The communication officer nods and presses a few buttons, activating the holo projector to display a middle aged man holding himself to the back of a chair and barking orders to his men.

« Power up the ion canons and retaliate toward the Subjugator !

« Sir ! » A younger voice says. «  The auxilliary generators have been damaged at 80%. To power up the canons, we would have to partly take some of the energy used by the shields ! »

« Redirect the energy, ensign ! in case you haven’t noticed, they are taking us down ! Shoot me those turrets ! »

« Yes, sir ! »

« Commander Delkor. Give me the status of your ship» Says Hux, his eyes injecting with blood.

The man in the holo projection straightens up  « Sir, we are currently under heavy fire. Our defense system sustened some serious damages but we can remain engaged in the fight.»

« Very well. I’ll leave you the oportunity to make up for the failure of this operation. » Hux narrows his eyes then looks toward the durasteel bay straight at the Subjugator. « I want you to damage the Subjugator, even if for this you have to sacrifice your own ship. Do I make myself clear, Delkor ? »

The commander visibly tenses through the holo then nods, answering with a low voice. « Yes, Sir.  We will honor your ord…»

Hux waves a hand, the communication officer cutting the transmission before Delkor can finish his sentence. « Prepare the hyperspace jump. Set a course for Starkiller 2. I have seen enough for today. »

***

**Resistance headquarters, general Organa’s private office.**

 

C3PO opens the office’s door and comes in, the cylinders controlling his motions making a characteristic noise. « Princess, lady Rey is here, as requested. »

Rey steps in, rubbing her arms as she looks at Leia.

« Thank you 3PO. Why don’t you go to the tech bay to have those cylinders checked ? I think you need some grease. »

« thank you princess, I will see to that immediately. » the protocol droid leave the office and closes the door behind him, leaving the two woman alone.

Leia smiles and nods at the chair in front of her. « Have a seat, Rey. »

Rey sits then smiles a little « you know that grease won’t fix that noise, right ? Some of his screws got loose. »

Leia looks at her with some wide innocent eyes. « Loose. Do you think this could have happened last night when he was deactivated ? » the former princess laughs and leans back in her chair. « 3PO is a lovely old companion, but I sometimes need the privacy he forgets to give me. Somehow, I had to come up with something. »

Rey keep smiling, but a strange sensation in the back of her neck makes her feel uneasy.

« I wanted to talk to you in private. » Adds the general in a soft tone. « About my son. »

Rey’s face immediately loses all colors, the motion of her hands over her arms stopping.

« What about him ? » she says, her skin crawling.

« I need to understand why you never told us you fought with him after Snoke’s death. I need to know why you let the story run about you killing Snoke when it was his doing. »

« What would it have changed ? » replies Rey in a soft tone. « Beside the fact that it would have marked him as a traitor for the first Order ? that would have meant signing his death warrant.»

« And you didn’t want that. » Leia’s eyes are intense, and Rey can’t hold that gaze any longer.

« No. I know he is the enemy, but I don’t want that. » She says, watching her hands.

«  Rey… look at me. » The former princess keeps her eyes over Rey’s head and when their eyes finally meet, she smiles. « I don’t want that either, and I am glad you didn’t say anything. »

Rey nods in gratitude, holding her fingers tighter.

« I’m not going to ask you why either. If you ever want to tell me, I know you will. All I need to know is that at some point, you decided to team up with him to do the right thing and it worked. »

Rey takes a hard breath her nails now digging in her palms to help her control her emotions.

« Rey, I have made a decision following the broadcast because I am seeing here an opportunity to end the war. After a lot of thinking, I am considering the idea of forming a temporary alliance with his part of the First Order to destroy General Hux’ side of the army. »

« You want a truce with Ben ? » The name escapes Rey lips as naturally as air does, and if Leia notices her choice of name for her son, she doesn’t make any comment about it.

« I think this is a logical choice as well as a first step in the right direction for the whole galaxy. However, I also know my son and I know he won’t listen to me. We have too much of an history together. » Her eyes fill with regrets but she still adresses Rey a reassuring smile. « But he might listen to you. Rey… would you accept to become our embassador with the First Order ? »

***

**Resurgent-Class Subjugator -Main Bridge**

« Sir, the Destructor is powering up his hyperdrive. » says one of the tech officers behind a console, a frown on his face. «  It‘s nose is slowly turning toward us. »

Ben looks frozen as he looks at the space scenery in front of him.

He knows the Anihilator is unmoving behind them, and the latest communication he got from Jelan let him know that the problem has been contained for now.

The Revelator is still sinking through the planet’s athmosphere like a giant fireball. The escape pods are scattering through space with no one picking up the survivors and the Dominator just made the hyperspace jump along with the ship backing it up, leaving behind the largely damaged Destructor.

Kira, who hasn’t left Ben’s side is observing the scenery as well, her arms folded. « Hux is unimaginative. » She states, her voice neutral.

Ben can only nod. He knows exactly how the Supremacy was destroyed thanks to the sacrifice of his surrogate aunt Amilyn. Is Hux going to put frontal hyperspace jump in the handbook to destroy an enemy’s fleet ?

« Cease fire. Link me to the Destructor. » says Ben in a powerful tone. Behind her mask, Kira smiles.

A flickering holo projection of the Destructor’s captain appears, the man’s face appearing strained.

« Commander Delkor, This is Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. There are currently thousands of souls derivating in space after abandoning the Revelator. Your ship is no longer in flying condition and any attempt at making an hyperspace jump will only lead to your complete destruction. Given your current action I understand you have been given the order to make that jump straight through  us, which means the complete destruction of my crew at the same time as yours, if your hyperdrive doesn’t explode first.»

Ben pauses, his face remaining neutral. « I am offering you an alternative. »

Commander Delkor is still gripping the back of a seat, his breathing appearing ragged, a cut bleeding on his forehead. « I am listening. »

« Turn off your battle stations, disengage your hyperdrive and surrender your ship to us. If you do this, we will send a rescue mission to transfert you and your men on our board. »

« I’d rather die on the battlefield than in a prison cell after a trial for treason. »  Spits Delkor, his face looking dejected.

« If I wanted you to die, Commander, you would already be choking to death. » simply says Ben, one of his lips slightly twitching. « I am merely offering you to come back where you rightfully belong within the First Order. »

Delkor clenches and unclenches his teeth several times before barking behind him « Disengage the goddamn hyperdrive and send the evacuation signal at once ! »

 

***

**Resistance Base – Rey’s private quarters**

She comes back in her quarters in autopilot and closes the door as soon as she is there.

In less thand two days, she will be formally introduced to Ben as the resistance embassador.

In less than two days, they will be reunited.

She feels dizzy just thinking about it.

* * *

 


	36. Alliances part 1

* * *

**Chapter 36 : Alliances part 1**

**30 weeks after crait events**

**3 weeks after the broadcast**

**Cloud City, Bespin**

 

 

The white walls are a problem for her.

The whole complex looks pristine, in stark contrast with everything Rey has always known. This is one of the reasons making her feels completely out of place, the other being the looks Finn gives her when he believes she isn’t watching.

Their delegation is composed of 10 people. There is Rey as the main negotiator with Finn and Poe as a back up, and 7 other resistance members, each having their own set of skills and being able to advise Rey about the organization’s needs.

As soon as they landed there, Finn and Poe have been on her tail, with a single difference between the two. Poe is his usual chatty and friendly self while Finn is tense and almost reluctant to talk to her.

She changed as soon as they arrived into the set of clothes Leia insisted on giving her. The ensemble is not too different from what she is used to wear if not for the fact that everything seems brand new. There are some cream colored pants,  a beige tunique and a sleeveless cream colored jacket letting her expose some beige armbands.  Her lightsaber hangs proudly from her belt, along with the small blaster Han gave her in what seems to be ages ago. For once, she decided to let her hair completely down, maybe out of the need of hiding herself for a few more moments before jumping into the arena.

The pressure of what is about to happen is nearly driving her insane.

She hasn’t heard or felt Ben in three weeks and the feeling of loss combined with the anticipation of seeing him again is almost too much to handle. Without the other resistance members around her, she would have waited for him in the hangar bay, her eyes turned toward the sky to spot the very first signs of his shuttle in the sky.

She knows, however, that they aren’t here to display any type of attachment. They are going to be watched at all times and for now, until they have discussed about it, what they share has to remain a secret. Is she going to be able to handle watching him as Kylo Ren when she knows who he truly is inside? Will she be able to be just the Jedi Knight who foiled his plans more than once ? How can she hide what she feels for him, when their bond feels so sacred ?

And there is the pressure of those negotiations. What if she fails ? What if he misinterprets her motivations once he sees that she is the embassador ? Can it ruin what they shared on Odessen ?

She keeps her arms folded as she looks down at the clouds through the bay of their suite. She tries to breathe, but the anticipation makes it difficult and there is…

« Allright, spill. Now. »

She slightly jumps at Finn’s voice and turns her head to check if he is actually talking to her. He is sitting on one of the couch, his eyes extremely dark and serious, and she knows that right now, she doesn’t have in front of her her friend met on Jakku, but the former stormtrooper turned instructor.

« What do you mean? » she asks as neutrally as she can while Poe stands and rubs his mouth, an usual sign of nervosity on his part.

« Come on, Rey. You really think we are fools ? There are things you hid from us. Leia may have decided to clean the slates about that, but Poe and I need to know where you stand. »

« Where I stand ? » her eyes widen in slow motion as she looks at him, shocked. « What are you talking about ? you know where I stand ! »

« I used to know. But you haven’t been yourself since you returned from Ahch-to and I know you hid things from us. Like… how the fuck did you end up on the Supremacy in the first place ? Or why you fought alongside with this monster instead of stabbing him with your lightsaber first chance you got ? »

Her hands drops as she realizes the weight of the accusations behind Finn’s words and she briefly looks at Poe, who at least has the decency of looking sorry for the outburst.

« It was something I was led to do… going there, I mean. I knew I had a purpose there. » How can she tell him what that purpose is without creating a permanent rift between them ? « It set in motion Snoke’s death. I had to be there for it to happen. »

Finn’s eyes remain on her face, doubts clearly written in them. « And you had to side Ren for that too ? »

Something suddenly ignites in her and she moves from the duraglass bay, her eyes narrowing. « Allright, now, you spill what you are thinking. Do you think I work for the First Order ? »

« Rey, that’s not what he means. » interrupts Poe in a serious tone.

« Maybe ! » Says Finn as he stands.

« How can you believe something like this ? » She replies, at the same time upset and hurt.

« How did you leave the Supremacy, Rey ? » his tone is dark, almost a warning.

« Chewie picked me up there ! I called for him !»

« And Ren let you leave ? » he adds in the same tone.

« No. He didn’t !» the voice of Ben asking her to join him that fateful night echoes in her mind. Her chest tightens and she has troubles hiding the sadness it inevitably makes her feel.

« Then how did you escape a ship full of enemies on your own ? »

« And how did you ? You and Rose ? » she says, louder than usual.

« We were already in the right sector ! »

« And I am a Jedi ! » She screams the following silence being deafening.

Finn’s face falls a little and Poe sits as Rey looks at them, several items floating around her before lowering slowly. « It probably saved me then, just as it probably saved me back on Starkiller and even before that several times on Jakku !»

« It’s allright Rey. We believe you. » tries Poe as he looks between his friends.

« No you don’t. » she whispers, her eyes staying on Finn. « You don’t because you don’t know me.  The real me.»

 _And he  knows all of me._ She thinks, her mind constantly bringing her back to Ben.

Peace settle within her only a few moments later, and it takes her all her willpower to avoid shutting her eyes and sighing.

Ben just entered Bespin’s athmosphere.

 ***

He feels her too as clearly as if she had been next to him and as he looks at Cloud City, he reminds himself that all his reactions toward her will have to be monitored if he wants to conceal what she is to him in front of her resistance friends.

He has been honest with his closests companions, but he doubt she has been the same with hers because her situation is far less comfortable. He is, after all, the monster. Not her.

 He briefed his five knights already. They have to act neutral and keep their helmets at all times, just as they always do within the First Order. He noticed Kira’s slight tension at the idea of being there. He knows that as the governor of Falleen, she has successfully concealed her force sensitivity, yet he can tell she is tense at the idea of meeting anonymously her negotiation partners.

He knows he has to look the part of the cold and calculated Supreme Leader and he truly hope nothing in his features will betray what Rey is to him.

Three weeks of full out war, of near death experiences and of dauntless strategy without seeing, hearing or feeling her. He wonders if he will really be able to resist to the urge of grabbing her against him and never let go.

***

As soon as the First Order delegation’s approach is formally announced the resistance members gather in the large room that has been prepared by the Governor of Bespin for the negotiations.

Rey is standing in the front, Finn and Poe next to her and the seven other members in a line behind them. She holds her hands together, partly to hide the fact that they are shaking and partly to dig her nails in her palms, the pain helping her staying grounded.

The white double door slides open, revealing behind it Reglan Dorkin, current governor of Bespin, followed by  the Supreme leader and his five knights right behind him.

The governor comes in first and bows his  head at the resistance delegation.

« Lady Rey, the First order delegation is here. As you know, I will stand by and watch as the neutral party in your negotiations. »

Rey nods at the governor, her eyes unable to move from Ben’s form as she quickly checks his physical condition. She could almost let out a breath, there are no obvious impairment in his way of holding himself.

Ben comes in with some powerful strides, his cape flying behind him, wearing his signature black outfit and the handle of his lightsaber clearly visible at his side. His face is completely blank, the perfect substitute for the mask he discarded weeks ago.

He stops and scans the delegation in front of him as if he was assessing them. The five knights stand behind him in perfect guarding stance and everybody misses the reaction of the one in the far left, breathing a bit harder than her companions as she looks through her visor at a certain resistance Pilot.

Rey drops her hands and raises her chin a little, calling upon the force to find the strength in her to play this part correctly, for everyone’s sake. She takes a step forward and nods at Ben.

« General Organa asked me to treat with you on her behalf. My words will reflect her will in every way possible and any engagement I take with you will be fullfilled as if she had treated with you herself. »

Her eyes meet Ben’s and she immediately feels the room spinning as if she was being swept off her feet.

HIs face remains neutral, but something in his brown orbs anchors her in a way only him can.

«This is not a surprise for me. I was expecting to treat with the last Jedi.» He says, his voice calm. « My knights will be here to provide support during the process.»

Rey slightly bows her head then turns toward her companions, happy to break eyes contact for now. « And I will be helped by Commander Poe Dameron and Major Finn. »

She can’t help but notice the look of pure hatred radiating from Finn as his eyes remain on Ben, but she choose to ignore it for now.

***

She hadn’t expected so many technicalities.

After the first three hours, she finally understands that the process of negotiating between two powerful and oposite entities can become a complete nightmare. If this is what politics looks like, she promises herself to stay away from it.  

What is it they are arguing about right now ? Somehow, her mind escaped for a while. She leans back and rubs her face, her move instantly stopping and her hand being slowly dragged down on her lap against her will.

She slightly turns her head and catches Ben’s eyes, his fingers slightly moving in front of him on te table then stopping just as she feels herself being released.

_Don’t show signs of exhaustion._

His voice in her head ! Her heart starts hammering in her chest as she hears at last the tone he obviously uses only for her.

_Keep yourself under control, sweetheart. We are being observed._

She straightens herself again on the chair and looks back at Poe who is in an animated discussion with one of the knights about neutral flight corridors in the Core regions.

« I think we can deal with this kind of details later. » She says, her voice a bit more powerful than usual and everyone goes silent as they look at her. She then turns her gaze toward Ben, her face as neutral as she can manage.

« We have a common goal. Both our organisations need to stop General Hux at any cost because of the major threat he currently represents for the galaxy. Why are we currently losing time over flight corridors above Coruscant when there is another Starkiller getting ready to blast us all somewhere in the unknown regions?»

Ben slightly lifts an eyebrow. « What would you propose then ? »

« Oh it’s simple. We take action. If we go on negotiating over each and any detail we don’t agree upon, we will give Hux enough time to perfect his weapon and blast us all with it. »

« Rey, this is… » Stars Finn and Rey suddenly stands and looks at him angrily. « No, you don’t get it, Finn. We are not here to set the records straight or to build a perfect world. Right now, we are working on an alliance to prevent the complete destruction of entire systems like it has been done with Hosnian Prime. Will you let your former stormtrooper pride come in the way of that ? Because if you want my honest opinion, you are even missing the target if you want to blame the whole First Order for you and your brothers in arms. »

She then turns and looks straight at Ben. « What can you tell us about the stormtroopers program ? »

« This is classified information. » He tries, hoping she will take the bait.

 _Magnificent creature_ … he thinks when she puts her hands on the table, leans forward and looks at him straight in the eyes.

« Do you need allies against Hux or not ? Because we can as well return to our base, stand by and wait until one of you has destroyed the other. »

She puts more weight over her hands as a way to anchor herself, his nearly hungry look dragging her toward him. Ben acts as if he is pondering what to answer, adding a hint of annoyance in his behavior, but she and his knights all know better.

« The current program is a substitute created by Hux’ father to make up for the fact that the first Order couldn’t afford a clone army. Brendol Hux solved the problem by massively having children abducted from their family and making them go through some heavy conditionning to turn them into perfect soldiers. Hux took over with this program and expanded it after having his own father killed.»

Finn’s nostrils flare as he takes a heavy breath, his teeth gritting. « seems like you have one thing in common with the guy. » He spits and Ben’s reaction happens in a blur.

He stands so fast the chair falls behind him. As his hand moves forward toward Finn, Rey raises hers and freezes his motion.

 _BEN ! NO !_ she projects toward him.

Ben looks at her, almost in a trance, and what she sees there is something that frightens her more than anything else… there is written pure agony.

_Don’t do this, Ben, please... This is our first step._

It’s the pleading that gets to him… he didn’t listen to her the first time and deeply regretted it. The stormtrooper isn’t worth losing another chance to end everything faster to be with her. Slowly, he lowers his hand, keeping his eyes locked with hers.

She lowers her hand in the same way, unaware of the fact that everyone is looking at them in complete silence.

Their eyes remain locked and she slightly nod.

Ben turns and walks to the door, raising two fingers to activate the opening. He quickly gets out and vanishes in the hall as the five knights stand at once.

Rey turns toward them and raises a hand.

« No, please… we have to make this work. I will go and talk to the Supreme Leader myself. »

Rey turns her head and glares at Finn, who has the decency of looking slightly bothered, before looking at Poe. « Please, proceed with the details until I am back.»

Poe nods once then watches her leave before turning toward the knights and giving them an arrogant grin. « So ! About those flight corridors… »

***

She follows the hall in fast motion, hoping somehow, he slowed down. She is quickly dismissing this idea, Ben being nowhere to be seen.

She stops after a while and shuts her eyes, projecting herself to try and locate him, but he is probably concealing his force signature, because all she gets from him is a blur.

_Ben please…_

Her perception of him gets clearer and she immediately walks to the elevator. She board in it and goes three levels down before exiting the cabin and running down the hall to the left. She enters a large space, surprisingly dark in comparison to the overwhelming white of the rest of Cloud City, and she understands she is in some service part.

She finds him in a corner, his back to her and his head lowered. He  has tossed his cape and lightsaber on the floor and she can tell that his hands are in fists at his sides. She comes to him in slow motion, as she would approach a wounded animal and once she is at a close range, she puts a hand between his shoulderblades.

Without a word he turns and she immediately wraps her arms around his waist as his arms circles her to bring her tighter against his chest. After a while, he burries his face in her hair and she remains as still and welcoming as she can because she knows this is all she can do about what is currently eating him.

No word will ever soothe him for the loss of his father.

Another testament of the power Snoke had over him.

Another proof of the kind of deed they have to fight against to make things right.

* * *

 


	37. Alliances part 2

* * *

**Chapter 37 : Alliances part 2**

**30 weeks after crait events**

**3 weeks after the broadcast**

 

**Cloud City, Bespin**

It takes them close to half an hour to head back to the negotiation room. They walk side by side, their face displaying nothing of what may have transpired between them, him with his cape flying behind him, her with her chin slightly lifted and her hand on the handle of her lightsaber.

They both raise their fingers at the same time, the door sliding open in a fast motion.

As they step in, the conversations stop, all eyes turned on them. Both return to their seat without a look toward their companions and it is Rey who breaks the silence after a while.

« Governor Dorkin, I trust the negotiations went on while we were settling our differences ? »

« Yes, Lady Rey. Absolutely and I was able to record a final agreement regarding the flight corridors in the inner core. »

She tilts her head, Poe Dameron yelping a little and rubbing the back of his head, his face displaying confusion. « Good. » she replies as quietly as she can as Kira frowns behind her mask. Under the table, the female knight extends her palm face up, increasing her awareness of the whole environment to detect any concealed force use.

« Now that this is out of the way…» adds Rey, « …we can perhaps go back to the urgent matter that is Starkiller 2 ? Unless someone wishes to bring up something else?» She turns her head and looks straight at Finn who slightly narrows his eyes in return.

« Actually, yes I would like to discuss the fate of the stormtroopers. » He says, his voice carrying an underlying anger that she knows is also directed at her.

She turns her head and looks at Ben, her face staying neutral. « We can surely find an agreement regarding the fate of the stormtroopers. »

« Our army is mainly composed of Stormtroopers. » He answers, his eyes locking with Rey’s, knowing that he will find in that connection the calm necessary to proceed without too many damages.  « If we reform the system now, we can as well hand the galaxy over to Hux. »

« This makes sense on the short term. Not on the long run. » Answers Rey, her voice sharp. « We can perhaps reach an agreement regarding their fate once Hux’s threat is removed? » She turns her head and looks at Finn « Would this agree with you, Major? »

Finn looks at her and nods toward the door. « A word with you, master Jedi? »

She nods and looks at Poe, giving him a meaningful look. « Starkiller 2. »

He nods as she stands, circling the table and getting out, followed by Finn.

Poe then looks at Ben and smirks, his hands folding over the table. « So, how do we do this? You talk first, I talk first? »

Kira slighly lowers her head, glad that her mask reveals nothing of the smile appearing on her lips. More than his good look, it is Poe’s personality that she finds absolutely magnetic and the way he challenges the one she sees as a brother only makes him more appealing.

***

Finn waits until the door is shut then looks at Rey, his eyes dark. « What did you talk about with him? »

« Why do you ask? Do you want to check if I am a traitor to the rebellion? Because this is what you think, right? » She challenges, her chin rising a little in defiance.

« Don’t be ridiculous! » He cuts, anger rising some more. « I know you are not a traitor, ok? But I also know you’re not telling us everything. For all the years I have been around that guy, he has been a murderous asshole. Yet, you meet with him twice without any backup and you are left in one piece. »

« Thanks for the vote of confidence, Finn! » she replies, annoyed. « Maybe that I am becoming a skilled fighter, hmmm?  If I was able to scar his face without training, you can easily imagine that I can hold my own against him thanks to the little things master Luke taught me. »

« Rey, that’s not what I meant! » he rubs his face, defeated, then sighs. « Damn it, seeing that guy… He was a nightmare for us. Serving under him was… »

Rey steps closer and puts her hands on his shoulders, looking at him in the eyes. « I can’t even begin to imagine. I know there are things you never told us and that some are related to him, but we have to make those negotiations work. Finn, this is our last chance. Remember how it was after Crait. How hard we worked to avoid extinction. If we fail now, we will be wiped out. »

She can see the doubts in his eyes and she squeezes his shoulders harder. « There are things that I know and that I can’t explain for now. You want the entire truth? Then yes, there are things that I hide from you. Not because I am betraying the rebellion, but because I am walking on the edge of something and I can’t bring any of you with me on that path. All you have to know is that I will never do anything that could hurt any of you. »

The shock in his eyes replaces the doubts, then soon enough, everything vanishes to be replaced by fear. Fear for her safety. « You are all my family. » She adds her voice soft. « The family I never had. And the family I will always protect. »

« I believe you. » He manages to say before grabbing her on a tight hug. « But if he tries anything… »

She pulls back after a bit and looks at him in the eyes. « He won’t try anything because we have a truce.  But please, whatever you do, don’t bring up Han again. »

He sighs and nods then looks at the door. « How about, I give you the ideas and I let you lead? I’m not sure I can control myself around him. »

She slightly lifts an eyebrow. « Isn’t that what you were supposed to do in the first place, Major ? »

***

The rest of the first evening of negotiations goes smoothly after this, and as Rey enters her private quarters after leaving her own companions, she feels completely drained. She knows the First Order’s delegation has been settled on another level at the opposite end of the flying city, yet, despite the distance, she can feel the comforting presence of Ben.

***

Kira is the last to remove her helmet as the other knights and Ben lock the space with their force ability to add another layer of protection to their living quarters.

She waves her hair back then rubs her green eyes, glad to be able to breathe something else than filtered air.

« What did you think about the negotiations? » Starts Daine as he looks at  Ben.

Ben removes his gloves and tosses them on a nearby table, unclasping his cape and throwing it over a chair. His eyes remain lowered. « It could have been worse for a first time. »

« Does she know we know about her? » Asks Adara, her voice calm and contrasting with the fierce look her knight attire gives her.

« No, I haven’t told her. » replies Ben as he looks at the female knight.

« The stormtrooper will be a problem. » says Jelan as he flops over a white couch.

« I am not sure. » adds Nervan after a bit. « I observed his behavior after he came back in the room with her. He seemed more compliant. She can control him. »

« She wasn’t using the force on him. I was open to our surroundings and I didn’t detect anything. » says Kira as she leans against one of the walls. « Whatever she told him in that hall worked. »

« For now. » insists, Nervan. « I’ll keep an eye on him, just in case. No need to take any chance. »

« You should keep Dameron in check instead. That one is unpredictable. » Daine sits on a chair, one of his ankles crossing over a knee as he looks at nothing in particular. « He is a good strategist trying to hide his skills under a carefree attitude. »

« He isn’t commander for nothing. » Says Ben as he turns to look at him. « He is the guy my mother uses for her special operations. »

An unnatural silence settles in the room for a few seconds, the five knights not being used to hear their master mention his mother in those terms, as if she was a normal person described in a normal conversation.

« I’ll deal with Dameron. I know him well enough.» Says Kira, her apparent calm not fooling Adara a single second. « I’m going to lay down. I’m drained. » She adds before nodding and vanishing in her room.

***

Poe paces in his own personal space, too wired up to even consider trying to sleep. Something is definitely putting his senses on high alert, but he can’t place it. He replays the whole meeting in his mind, his hands rubbing his black locks back then holding them.

At some point, he sits and shakes his head, his hands sliding to join in front of his mouth. He suddenly groans then flops back, a set of green eyes appearing in his mind.

Kira.

He hasn’t seen her in over three weeks, and hasn’t talked to her in over one.

Somehow, it doesn’t feel right. Poe puts his hands on his stomach, his eyes on the ceiling. Would she answer if he tried contacting her now? He has no information to deliver, and no data to gather either but everything in him screams that he needs to at least hear her voice.

After a few minutes of torturing himself, he throws his hands up and sits up. Reaching for his portable communicator, he activates his contact list and ponders for a while.

It was after all just a kiss and they never mentioned it again in their subsequent communications…

_And this is war, without any guarantee of seeing each other again before it’s too late…_

He presses the button and waits.

***

She removes the last part of her armor when she hears the sound of her communicator being activated. She looks toward the door, wondering why one of her companions would use this way to talk to her instead of knocking at the door. She grabs the black device and sits, recognizing instantly the symbols displayed over the holographic surface.

Poe.

She pales, wondering if he has recognized her in the negotiation room.

She activates the communicator anyway.

« Dameron. » She says, using the usual carefree tone she crafted for him. « Were we supposed to be in touch so soon? »

She hears him chuckling and can perfectly picture the twinkle in his eyes. « Damn, Sandeco, you have a way to make a man feel wanted. »

She lays back and smiles, her eyes shutting. « Sorry, I am not known to be a good girl. »

« Yeah I know. Badass smuggler to the bones. » this time he laughs, and the vibrations it makes create ripples in the force hitting her at full strength.

She closes her eyes. Doomed. She is doomed.

« What can I do for you tonight ? »  She says, putting a hand over her forehead.

« Would it sound too bold if I said I simply wanted to hear your voice? ». His tone softens just a little, and what it does to her is strange, really.

Is it normal to feel like your chest is tightening and trying to expand at the same time?

« If I didn’t know better, I’d say you are trying to sweet talk me. » Focus, she needs to keep her focus… She repeats herself over and over again that he doesn’t know who she is, and that if he knew, he would run away after trying to blast her into oblivion.

« Would you say I am succeeding? » Why is his voice softening, really? She doesn’t think it is fair at all. It is going to make things harder, on the long run.

« I’d say you definitely are onto something. » It can’t be real. Dameron is a player. He charms his way into the universe to get what he wants and he has to want something, right ? She tries to deflect everything by laughing. « Ok, seriously. What can I do for you ? »

« Kira. »

Her first name. In a soft and dragged tone. He is tired, she can tell. They all are.

« Yes ? »

« I’m serious. I really wanted to hear your voice tonight. I’m on a complicated mission and it’s tense…and I realized that I miss you. »

She wonders at some point if she isn’t being force choked. It’s like she can’t breathe anymore. Her heart is racing and the weird sensation in her chest gets worse. « Are you all right? » she manages to let out, her tone different from what he knows.

That makes him laugh… he isn’t used to hear concern in her voice. « Yeah… I am. Listen, you’re probably busy, so, I’m going to leave you. » Does she hear a bit of sadness in his voice?

She can handle many things, but not that. For some reason, it feels wrong.

« Poe, wait. » She never called him by his first name until now.  « Listen, I had a complicated day too… but I’m happy you called. »

He chuckles again and she realizes that this sound will be her downfall. « Yeah, me too. » he says after a while. « I wish you wouldn’t be so far right now. »

« Same here. » She manages to say, trying to forget the fact that she can feel him exactly three levels above her.

***

She feels his presence in her room hours later as she is laying in her bed, snuggled on her side under the white blanket. She gave up on sleeping after having tried for hours to reach a point where she would be relaxed enough.

The first thing hitting her is the warmth going with their bond activating. She sits up and turns her head. There he is, sitting on the floor against the wall, his eyes set on her.

She gives him a sad smile then looks away. « So close and yet so far, hmmm? »

« We can’t take any chance. It’s too soon. » His voice is calm and yet strained. 

« You think your men wouldn’t understand. » she stands from the bed, holding the blanket around her as she makes her way toward him. Slowly she sits next to him, her head resting next to his. She looks up at him and adresses him another soft smile making him feel like he is watching the sun.

« They already know. » He bends and barely kiss the tip of her nose. « I told them as soon as I came back three weeks ago. »

« Oh. I didn’t have the same courage. » she muses, her head lowering to rest against his shoulder. She closes her eyes, glad that the strength of their bond allows them to feel each other’s touch.

« It’s allright, it’s more complicated for you than it is for me. »

They remain silent for several minutes, their breathing synchronized.

She is the one breaking the silence after a bit. « How bad is it with Hux ? »

He considers the idea of lying to her, but she would certainly feel it. « This is a full out  war, Rey. He has some supply, a large army despite the fact that some are defectif to join me after his latest moves, and we have yet to determin the size of his fleet, but it is pretty massive. I am finding out that Snoke had many side projects that I didn’t know of, and Hux took control of all that. »

The next question is one she wishes she wouldn’t have to ask. « Do you think we can defeat him ? »

« I think our best chance is to hold our positions when he attack. Out of that, I don’t think we have enough ressources for now to make any meaningful move. »

She moves her head back and looks up at him, surprised to see in his eyes things he feel for her but that he doesn’t say.

« What will happen if he overpower us ? » She can’t say that she isn’t scared, but there is something in his eyes that keeps her grounded and peaceful.

« We’ll run. You and me. And we’ll hide in the outer rim. It’s easy to vanish when you know where to go. »

He knows he is lying to her.

 He’ll fight until the end because Hux will never stop the chase. He is the Supreme Leader. For another to take his place, he has  to die. However, he feels like he owes to her beautiful hazel eyes some moments of peace. « We’ll choose a place where there are trees and where you’ll be able to stand under the rain.  I knew a few…»

She puts her head back on his shoulder and listens to his voice as he describes some of the greenest planets he has encountered during his travels.

She falls asleep a few minutes later.

***

Razor space base. Ilum’s orbit. Unknown regions.

Hux lets the service droid finish as he is getting it to trim his hair shorter than usual. The sides are now almost completely shaved, giving his nose a more prominent look.

Once the droid is done, he stands and goes to the communication console from his personal quarters and checks some of the latest reports.

He rubs his chin, noticing that most of his informers are unable to locate the Jedi girl. Is that fanatic like her peers ? Hiding and going in crazy quests to find long gone datas with the hope to find the solution to all of the universe’s problems ?

She has to be somewhere.

As he is about to switch off the console, a new report comes up . Hux opens it and starts reading, his eyes immediately changing as he discovers the encrypted message sent to him from Bespin.

How strange… his contact there, one of his regular informers, wishes to speak to him as soon as possible about  a once in a lifetime opportunity…

* * *

 


	38. Alliances part 3

* * *

**Chapter 38 : Alliances part 3**

**30 weeks after crait events**

**3 weeks after the broadcast**

 

**Cloud City, Bespin**

The next two days of negotiations are somewhat easier since they no longer fight.

Finn keeps his words and voices his concerns through Rey instead of through frontal attacks. Poe schools his attitude a little and in return, Ben makes the effort of keeping his temper under a tight control. He has the easier deal out of the three… one look into Rey’s eyes simply allows him to open himself to peace, and he is starting to see her as a ray of light into the ocean of darkness he drowned into a long time ago.

The First Order and the Resistance manage to settle an agreement regarding their involvement against Hux’ organization. It implies a non aggression pact that the Resistance members have obviously more troubles accepting than Ben and his knights. However, when the discussions came about this, Rey made it clear that you can’t fight an ally, even if it is meant to be a temporary one.

She is getting more and more at ease with her ambassador role and a lot of the remarks and comments she makes are unanimously accepted by the different parties.

No real strategy has been defined against Hux yet, mostly because they are all more or less in the dark regarding his current location or the exact status of his fleet.

« All we know about it is coming from intel collected from the smuggling world. Hux apparently used some private contractors for the building of some of his facilities. He managed to go under the radar for a while but it didn’t last and we decided to rely on outside intel to get another view of his moves. It was a lot more useful than any data we collected from the inside since he was erasing his tracks within the First Order.» Says Ben as he looks at Rey.

She nods and looks briefly at Poe. « We are also in contact with a group of smugglers for the same reason. We have one very reliable asset and she has proven to be very useful, so far. Commander Dameron is the one communicating with her ».

Poe leans forward and he folds his hands over the table.  « I am getting regular updates and we go back and forth quite often to fine tune our understanding of any situation. So far, she allowed us to dismantle several key facilities in the Outer Rim.»

Kira remains still, watching him through her visor as she holds her hands together under the table. The past two days have been more difficult than expected for her. Hearing his words during their last communication has put her in a state where she is no longer certain she can set apart her duty and her personal needs.

 And she needs him. She knows it as clearly as she knows that her way of harnessing the force is neither light nor dark. The careless part of her, the one which never existed until him, wants him to recognize her under the armor. But she also knows that she would instantly lose him if it was coming down to this, because then, he would only see her as a Knight of Ren and member of the First Order.

_Time to play along_ … Thinks Ben and Daine tilt his masked head before talking through his modulator. « Would she consider sharing her data with us ? »

Poe looks straight at the knight, his eyes slightly darkening and his whole behavior betraying a possessive trait that shouldn’t exist between intelligence agents. « I can’t speak on her behalf but the reason she sided us is because she wants her revenge over the guys who ruined the planet she is now governing. She would need guarantees and even then, I am not sure she would follow you. »

« Why not? » asks Daine as he observes Kira’s behavior at the same time?

« Because she hates anything associated with the First Order since you nearly destroyed Falleen. » he replies, an eyebrow lifted.

Kira’s fingers turn white inside her gloves and the shift in her force signature doesn’t go unnoticed by her companions.

« We could perhaps discuss this matter with her. » cuts Rey as she looks at Poe. « At some point, we are going to use her data for the benefit of everyone in this room. Better be clear with her about that if we want to keep her trust. »

Poe gives her a warning look his voice lowering a little. « Rey, this is not going to be that simple. »

From under the table, Adara raises two fingers and instantly feels the fierce energy coming from Poe. She slightly turns her head, looking like she is checking all of her companions, her eyes however settling on Kira.

She is too still, almost a statue, the material of her gloves slightly cracking as she is twisting it. She can’t remove her eyes from Poe and has to use all her strength not to lose control of her abilities. Adara feels the disturbance in the force around her, something that, to her knowledge, never happened before.

Despite being the youngest, Kira was always the strongest and the wisest after Ben.

« Would you rather hide this from her? » Rey gives a side look toward Finn, who is slightly fidgeting on his seat before focusing back on Poe.

« We’ll talk about it later. » he says almost through gritted teeth, feeling an insane sense of loyalty toward his smuggler.

Kira can feel everything… his energy creating ripples in the force, his fierce way of defending the version of her he knows. Her body reacts in ways she doesn’t understand. She suddenly needs more air as if she was involved in an intense battle. Her heart is racing yet, her body remains desperately still.

Rey nods then frowns, something making the hair in the back of her head rise.

« I think it is time for a break. »says Ben, his features remaining neutral.

 Rey’s eyes meet his and as she is about to ask why, something stops her. « One hour? » she asks randomly.

Ben nods then stands, his knights doing the same. « One hour should be enough, yes. »

***

No one said anything when Kira stormed in their private quarters and started tossing her armor parts everywhere.

No one commented as she dropped her helmet before vanishing in her own room.

This is how they are. When one of them is down, the others are not trying to force them back into their original condition. They wait, because sometimes, this is all they can do.

This time, however, Adara finds herself getting restless. Sitting next to Nervan, she can’t stop looking toward Kira’s door, her senses still on high alert.

Ben stands in front of the duraglass, perfectly motionless. For an outsider, he simply looks like someone watching the gas clouds. For his companions, it is pretty obvious that something is heavily weighting on his mind.

Jelan is the one breaking the silence to address the issue no one talks about. « So, Kira and Dameron, hmmm? »

« Don’t be ridiculous. » cuts Daine. « Kira wouldn’t have taken a risk like that. »

« You felt her reaction. We all did. She nearly lost control in that room just because he was talking about her. Hell, even the Jedi girl felt it. »

« Rey. » Says Ben without turning back. « Call her Rey. Not the ‘Jedi girl’.» 

Jelan rubs his face then looks at the ceiling.  « Ok. Still, she felt the disturbance in the force. It was written on her face. »

« Whatever is happening to Kira, we have to help her through it. If she slips and Dameron recognizes her, the resistance might break the negotiations and stop all the actions they are currently taking thanks to their informer on Falleen. ». Nervan takes Adara’s hand and squeezes it gently before releasing it. « I’ll go talk to her. »

Ben shakes his head and heads straight to Kira’s room, entering without knocking.

***

**Razor space base. Ilum’s orbit. Unknown regions.**

 

« The negotiations are currently in recess, my lord and both parties have retreated to their quarters. » explains the cloaked figure through the holofeed, his hands in front of his prominent stomach.

Hux paces in his private quarters, holding his hands behind his back. « Have they reached an agreement yet? »

« I believe they are getting to a point where they believe they can work together.  However, it seems also obvious that some of their differences are… irreconcilable.» The voice of the cloaked figure is soft, almost caressing.

Hux stops and turns on his heels to look at the star field in front of him « What are those differences ? »

« The Resistance is reluctant with the idea of sharing assets. My lord, if I may, if the usurper is in so much need of his enemy’s allies, doesn’t that mean that his quest is already doomed? »

The general waves a hand, his face showing disgust. « This is something he refuses to acknowledge. His blind faith in his tricks will be his downfall. »

The head of the cloaked figure tilts. « Yet, words are spreading about your last encounter with his fleet. It has been said that the force played a huge part in the loss of … »

« You shouldn’t listen to rumors, governor. The Force is the excuse fanatics use to try and rise to power. » snarls the general. « And remove this stupid cloak from your head. Who are you hiding from? Me? I already know who you are! »

The governor removes the hood from his head and looks straight at Hux’ holographic projection. « I apologize for the inconvenience, my lord. I didn’t mean to upset you.» The round and bald face of Governor Reglan Dorkin displays a perfect picture of genuine concern. « I am afraid we do not have much time left before the two parties decide to leave Bespin. »

Hux narrows his eyes and stiffly nods. « I am well aware of this, Dorkin. You will proceed tonight. If you succeed, the credits will be transferred to your account in Coruscant. »

The governor bows as deeply as he can, his eyes shutting. « I will not disappoint you, my lord. »

***

**Bespin**

« I never expected it. »

Kira has troubles looking at Ben, who is currently leaning against the door, his arms folded. When he doesn’t say anything, she goes on, her voice conveying a fragile trait he rarely heard coming from her.

« It started as we planned it. Our contacts remained basic and professional. I was delivering the data, he was checking them, giving me a feedback and that was it until the next time. » She pauses, her voice softening a little. « But then, the nature of everything changed. »

« How did it change? »

 She slightly raises her eyes to look at her master, wondering if the whole situation is upsetting him. For once, she can’t read him like an open book. « He started contacting me for our data exchanges, but once we were done, he was doing small talks. I thought nothing of it, at first. I imagined it would be clever to go with the flow to avoid looking suspicious. »

« And you started enjoying it. » There is no accusation in Ben’s voice and this is for her a relief.

« I didn’t mean to. But he actually is an interesting person. » She slightly smiles against her will, a picture of Poe’s brown locks falling over his forehead flashing in front of her eyes.

« Yeah. Pilot’s talk. » mumbles Ben as he looks straight at Kira.

« Not just that! » She answers, almost feeling offended on Poe’s behalf. She slightly frowns, confused by the nature of her own feelings then shakes her head when she realizes she is back talking her master for someone being technically their enemy.

He looks at her for a very long while, the weight of his gaze being so heavy on her that it makes her completely lower her eyes.

« It’s allright, Kira. » He finally says, and when she looks up into his eyes, all she can see is a mix of concern and understanding.

« Is it like that for you too? » She tries in a voice so low he can barely make out the words.

« The sense that this is too good to last? Yes. »

She shuts her eyes, not wanting to confront herself to this idea.

« Kira, look at me. »

She forces herself to reopen her eyes and look straight at him, agony in her green eyes.

« You know what the odds are. » his face remains calm and she feels like she is discovering a new side of him. Is that the effect Rey has on him?

« Even without that, Ben. Once he realizes what I am… » She can’t bring herself to say more.

« Then make the best of the time you have with him. »

***

The negotiations start again as the sun goes down, and the room is now lit by some orange and yellow lights giving a very warm feeling to the whole setting.

Rey is absently listening to the discussion one of the knight is having with her own weaponry expert as she is studying Ben’s face. The disturbance she felt in the force is gone, but she has yet to understand what it was. She is under the impression that he isn’t as clueless as she is and she makes a mental note to ask him about it as soon as possible.

His eyes are moving from the resistance expert to Jelan as he follows the discussion, but he is well aware of the fact that Rey can’t detach her eyes from him.

_They are going to notice you are staring, sweetheart._

She bites the inside of her cheek to avoid smiling and looks away, wishing  he would use this telepathic skill more often.

« If the technology is based on the same principle as Starkiller, then the destruction can only happen by rendering the planetary core unstable. »

« I doubt they would make the same mistake twice. » replies Jelan. « Unless Starkiller 2 was constructed at the same time as the original version. We know that the biggest issue is to harvest enough kyber crystal to power the planetary core. » ,

« Where does the crystal comes from? » cuts Finn his eyes suddenly lighting up.

« Ilum. » says Nervan from the oposite end of the table. « This is the only place in the Unknown Regions where the crystal can be massively harvested.  Hux settled a mining colony there, despite the difficult living conditions on the surface. »

« Can’t we raid the colony and take control of it? » Finn looks at Poe and Rey then back at the knight.

« It would request a lot of resources. Several Resurgent-class ships remain on orbit to hold this position. The battle to take over this military asset could cost us a lot without any guarantee of success. » Nervan looks at Ben who nods at him, then focuses back on Finn. « We believe there is a construction site there too. One for a new kind of ship. Kyber powered. If the rumors are true, it shelters a research facility testing several technologies that could be embarked on a Resurgent-class or something similar. »

« That doesn’t sound good. » mumbles Poe before he can stop himself.

« No it doesn’t. » says Adara and the whole resistance members look at her, almost shocked to realize the voice changed by the modulator is a female one. « They could be currently working on a versatile form of the Death Star beam. Powered in such a way, several Resurgent-Class could create complete havoc through the galaxy and subdue the worlds one after the other. The beams wouldn’t be able to destroy a whole planet, but would certainly eradicate whole cities in only a few seconds. »

« Is that possible? » Asks Poe, his fingers flexing in a way Kira has already seen, when he was discussing with her about really risky things.

« This is what happened to Jedha during the empire era. A rebellion nest destroyed by a test beam coming from the original Death Star. All that is left of this place is a vitrified crater.» describes Jelan, his voice cold.

« Only a few planets would have the firepower necessary to try to resist to an attack of this type, and this wouldn’t happen without heavy losses. » adds Adara.

« We’ve got to do something! » Says Finn as he looks at Rey. She nods in reply then looks back at Ben, looking determined. « I think he is right. If what your knights describe is accurate, then not taking action against Ilum could be the end of everything. »

Their eyes meet and for a moment, everyone believes they are challenging each other with the force.

_We don’t have enough firepower to do that._

Something shifts in her eyes and he sees again in them the same plea he refused to acknowledge on the Supremacy.

_Rey…_

He slightly shakes his head then leans forward a little, his voice taking a dark powerful edge. « Attacking Ilum would mean concentrating all our resources on this attack with all the risks coming with it if the technology settled there is what we are imagining. »

«Couldn’t we send spies? » She asks before looking at her own companions.

« This could be very dangerous, Rey. If the whole planet is protected as they described, it will be a true fortress. I don’t know how we could land there undetected. »

Kira suddenly raises her head as her perception of the force sends her a warning.   She looks at Ben and slightly projects herself in his mind. His eyes immediately darken but his behavior doesn’t change.

_Rey… we need to get out of here, now._

The confusion in her face is something she has troubles concealing.

« Planning such an attack requests more information about Ilum’s current status. Lets discuss about this matter furthermore tomorrow.»

« Very well. » she replies and stands, looking at the resistance members before leading them out.

_Keep your senses open, sweetheart and lock your doors with your abilities._

Ben sees her slightly bow her head as she gets out then gives a side looks to Kira, who is looking straight through her visor at Reglan Dorkin.

***

Kira follows the governor through the corridors in Cloud City, her force abilities allowing her to conceal herself from the weak minds crossing her path. Once he has left the negotiation room, the plump man’s attitude changed, and from the quiet and delicate person he presented himself as, he became someone walking fast, with a purpose and with a mind filled with chaotic ideas.

Someone must have taught him to conceal his nature and thoughts in front of force users which he did… until something made him slip.

Jedha.

This small relapse in his otherwise tight control could have been left unnoticed, except for the fact that Kira had to increase her awareness in the force a few moments before in order to push past the feeling of Poe being physically near her and yet so far at the same time.

She doesn’t know yet how far the governor’s disloyalty goes. It could range from him being a simple intel agent gathering data worth selling on the black market to him being one of Hux’ agent. She knows that no matter what it represents, in the end, she needs to know what he wants, what he plans…

Then… she’ll deliver the punishment.

* * *

 


	39. Betrayal

* * *

**Chapter 39 : Betrayal**

**30 weeks after crait events**

**3 weeks after the broadcast**

 

**Bespin – resistance quarters**

 

Once the resistance has joined its quarters, Rey locks the door. She briefly looks at her companions before raising her hands and letting the force flow through her to block the mechanism.

 _There_ , she thinks. _I did what Ben requested_.

Behind her, Finn is flexing his fingers while Poe is pacing and the other resistance members look confused.

« Ok, what was that about? Why did we leave the negotiation table so fast? » Ask Poe, his eyes dark.

« Something is going on. I don’t know what it is, but I felt it. » She replies, her voice calm.

« Through the force? » interrupts Finn, his eyes piercing over her.

« Yes, through the force. » She can see where this is heading already.

« Does it come from the First Order? » There we go…

« No, it has nothing to do with any of them. There is something else. I wish I could tell you more but I can’t. I‘m new at all of this. » She hates having to lie to him but how could he accept the fact that she is letting Ben guide her moves right now?

She moves away from them and goes to the duraglass, looking out at the sky. « We should remain focused over our surroundings. » she sighs then shakes her head. « We can’t see a thing because of those clouds. »

Poe gets closer and looks out, his arms folded. « That’s why it’s a safe haven for the smugglers. It’s really easy to come and go here. »

« We should have never accepted to come here for the negotiations, then. What if they double-cross us ? » asks Finn from across the room.

Rey keeps her eyes out and slowly shakes her head. « It would be so easy for Hux to get us all… we can’t see him coming. »

« I don’t think Hux cares much about us right now, Rey. If he is in the middle of a Civil War with Ren, then that’s going to be his primary target. » says Poe in a soothing tone, yet his eyes can’t stop scanning the clouds.

***

**Bespin – First Order Quarters**

 

Ben can’t stop pacing, his eyes displaying the darkest color they could take. The intense concentration he is in marks his face, and as he is chewing nervously on the inside part of his cheek, he remains focused on Kira’s force signature.

Jelan is near the duraglass, a black device in his hand. He presses several symbols over the holographic surface, an holographic model of Bespin’s station appearing in front of them.

Adara comes closer , following the golden dot that is currently moving through the halls of the highest levels. « She is in the governor’s quarters. »

« Right into the Bantha’s pit. » Says Daine who settled next to the door, armor and  weapons ready to go to Kira’s rescue if needed.

« I wonder what she felt. » Asks Nervan as he joins Adara, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

***

**Bespin – Governor Dorkin’s quarters**

 

Deception. Anger. A bit of disgust… And greed… so much greed.

Kira remains concealed thanks to the force and the governor, despite his strong will, remains too weak to resist to her control. She is staying in a corner, unmoving, clad in her armor, and through her visor, she looks at the back of Dorkin’s bald head. Extending a hand toward it, she accesses the chaos in there and steadies herself as she is being assaulted by fast images.

He is older, much older than she thought. He was there, on Jedha. He was small but he was there when the death star fired its deadly beam.

He saw it… he felt the heat… he smelled the acrid scent of his burnt flesh, and when he woke up days later in a pathetic excuse for a med bay, his world and everything he had known was gone.

Vader…. Vader… Vader… this name rolls in his mind like waves of acid crashing on the shores of a volcanic planet.

The governor checks the time on his holoclock, his lips curving into one of his deceptively soft smiles. He crosses the space to join his immaculate desk then presses a button.

« Sir. » an electronical voice replies.

«  Sector 17. Proceed. »

Kira frowns, wondering what sector 17 is … until she remembers two distinct things from the moment they set a foot in the facility. The governor had asked their guide to show them their quarters in sector 32. Then he had mentioned to bring them straight to the conference room levels in sector 28, which was a level above hers but at the opposite end of the long hall.

Following that logic and where she felt Poe the night before… Sector 17 is the quarters housing the…

 

***

**Bespin – Resistance quarters**

 

The first one to warn them is Lunka, the resources operator who was currently preparing a report to send to the base. She spots out of the corner of her eye some vapor forming around all the vents and stands as fast as she can.

« Hey guys, what is that? » She asks.

Poe turns fast and spots the vapor gathering in fast motion. « Shit. Rey, we’ve got to go. Come on, guys ! » He says, heading straight to the door.

Everyone gather in front of the door and Rey raises a hand to unblock the mechanisms. « all right, let’s go. » She says then presses the panel, the door remaining closed. She frowns and raises her hand again, scanning the mechanism with the force.

«Rey? » Finn asks in a warning tone, the smoke gathering even more and getting close to them.

« I don’t understand ! » She says, focusing as hard as she can to make the door move.  « I undid what I have done. »

She turns and gets a glimpse of the smoke crawling toward their feet.

« Step back! » she says, then takes out her lightstaber and ignites it before attacking the door as hard as she can.

***

**Bespin – Governor Dorkin’s quarters**

 

Kira knocks the governor out with the force, rage sipping through each pore of her skin. She lets him unceremoniously crash on the floor before running out of his quarters, and enhancing her speed to join the lift.

 _BEN! GET TO THE RESISTANCE!_ She projects, using her ability to connect to his mind.

Poe… no, nothing can happen to Poe now!

***

**Bespin – First Order Quarters**

 

« Kira is on the move. » Suddenly says Adara as she spots the golden dot moving in fast motion over the holographic projection.

Ben turns and takes out his lightsaber, igniting it. He looks at his knights, his teeth gritting.

« Helmets on. She is heading to the resistance quarters. Something’s wrong. »

He takes off, his hand gripping the handle of his lightsaber and his hand directed toward the door to move it out of the way with his powers.

_REY !_

***

**Bespin – Resistance quarters**

 

They are starting to cough, the vapor making them light headed. For some reason, the lightsaber is barely scratching to surface of that door. Poe and Finn fire at it with their blasters to try and help,  to no avail.

The whole room seems to have been reinforced and Rey is feeling weaker by the minute… weaker than the others. She feels disconnected from everything, as if she was floating on a cloud.

 _Ben…_ She tries, unable to project anything.

She stumbles and Finn grabs her fast in his arms. « REY! Damn it! ». Yelling makes him go into a coughing fit and he tries to cover his face with the side of his jacket while holding the Jedi against him.

Poe sees that the resistance members are slowly losing consciousness. His shirt pulled over his nose, and desperate to find a solution, he kicks the command panel repeatedly, hoping to open it so he can create a short circuit to unlock the door.

***

Kira exits the elevator and runs down the hall, her heartbeat pulsing loud in her ears. She knows she is losing control. Some of the service pipes in the hall are vibrating, some parts unsealing as she runs past them.

She has been there once before. That night, in the temple, when it was them or the others.

Tonight again, it will be them, even if she has to burn this facility and make it fall into the planet’s gas core.

She spots a large number of stormtroopers gathering in front of the quarters, her rage reaching its peak. She ignites her lightsaber and screams as she reaches the first wave of soldiers, what she doesn’t touch with her lightsaber ending up being crushed by the distortion in the force she creates around her.

***

Ben feels the distortion as he reaches the hall from the opposite side, followed by the other knights. All four of them runs to the massive gathering of stormtroopers, Ben sounding like he is hyperventilating out of anger.

« Take them down. I want all the resistance members safe and sound.» he growls, his tone low and commanding.

He stomps and looks at a group of stormtroopers threateningly before spinning and waving his lightsaber in fast motions, making his way to the door. The fact that he absolutely can’t feel Rey in the force nearly brings him to the brinks of madness, the only color in front of his eyes being the red of his lightsaber as it cuts the pristine armors of Hux’ men.

Jelan fights his way by his side, his eyes darkening behind his visor as he feels the same type of effects he experienced on Naboo when he found the force suppressant technology.

  _The device is probably currently used in the resistance quarters,_ he thinks, the effects only mildly affecting him.

He knows however that they have to end this fast to minimize the amount of exposure they are currently facing. Increasing his speed, he extends a hand and crushes the windpipe of the stormtrooper in front of him while catching with his lightsaber the one trying to hit him from behind.

Fighting side by side, Nervan and Adara look like they are moving as one as they corner several of the stormtroopers before finishing them off. Their bodies are connecting, getting close, separating then coming back closer, each one of their move being deadly for their opponents but delicate each time they are touching. Together, they look like a single breathing entity.

While his companions are helping Ben to reach the door, Daine decides to make his way to Kira. He knows that in that state of rage, she is powerful, deadly but more than likely able to forget her own safety. He feels with a sharp accuracy the distortion she is producing, and he knows that right now, the light side is completely asleep in her.

She yells and pants, the heat under her helmet being nearly unbearable, the rage almost making her feel like she is running a fever. She extends her gloved hand toward one of the stormtroopers and tightens her hand in a fist, the armor instantly collapsing over the man, entirely crushing him. Waving her hand, she sends another one flying against a wall, the connection of his body with the durasteel producing a sickening noise.

She doesn’t see men in front of her. She doesn’t see soldiers. She doesn’t even see her fighting companions. The only thing she sees is that locked door, and the horrible prospect of what she may find behind it.

***

**31 weeks after Crait events**

**2 days after Bespin’s betrayal**

**Falleen**

Wearing her usual smuggler clothes, Kira is sitting next to Poe’s bed, her eyes not leaving his face.  She hasn’t slept since they escaped Bespin and she hasn’t been able to calm down despite all of Adara’s efforts to help her vent. The 10 resistance members are still under the effect of the toxin governor Dorkin poisoned them with and are currently being kept safe within the walls of the mining facility.

 

After having analyzed it, Jelan promised her that this was simply supposed to act as a very powerful sedative, probably to impair for a long time the only Jedi of the group.

 

Kira warned General Organa herself about the rescue of the Bespin resistance delegation after the betrayal of the supposed neutral party.  She left out the fact that it was the First Order Delegation that brought the 10 safely to Falleen and instead, said it was a beautiful act of teamwork among the smugglers that allowed them to reach a happy ending after a terrible ordeal.

 

She conveniently forgot to mention the governor was currently tied and kept unconscious with the force somewhere in one of the many old storage rooms of the complex.

 

 

She also left out the fact that Ben’s delegation is currently in hiding several miles away, its members concealing their force signature just as she currently does. Ben couldn’t accept leaving Rey’s side while she was still asleep and went into another fit of rage when one of them suggested it would be wiser.

 

She understands why. More than any other, she knows.

 

She reaches forward and moves a lock of hair away from Poe’s forehead, her eyes slightly softening.

 

***

It took him several hours before being able to project himself through the force to appear in her room. The force suppressant technology, despite having mildly affected him, has deeply affected her, and it is only when her body started reconnecting that he was able to be there, physically with her.

 

He is sitting on the floor, one knee up and held against his chest, his head resting against the wall behind him, in a perfect mirror image of his position in the caves, miles away. He knows his mother is on her way but somehow, the idea of feeling her physically near in the force doesn’t anger him as it used to.

 

For now, he cares only for one thing.

 

He wants Rey to open her eyes.

* * *

 


	40. Aftermath

** **

* * *

** Part 40 : Aftermath **

**3 days after Bespin’s betrayal**

 

 

She is back on that slope.

Her instinct tells her that she has to be careful with the dual suns. At this time of the year, their ray are difficult to handle.

She slowly walks down the path leading to the beach then stops once she gets a full view of it. She sees the golden sand, the blue rocks emerging from it and the green sea softly crashing on the shore.

She spots them in the distance. Three figures running, screaming and laughing. He is here, of course, as always, freshly returned from yet another mission. He is still wearing his pilot suit and his X-Wing is safely standing on its usual spot on the hill.

The two smaller figures probably saw him landing, and immediately ran to him. They both knock him off his feet, their laugh louder than the crashing waves. He wraps his arms around them and looks like he will never let go.

As she comes closer, she sees the tangles of dark curls over the little girl’s head, so reminiscing of his. He finally spots her and as his smile softens, he sits up, holding the two smaller figures against him.

The little boy turns his head and looks directly at her, his smile impossibly wide under his green eyes.

And it’s like looking into a mirror.

***

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Med quarters**

Kira’s eyes bolt open, and it takes her a few seconds to she realizes where she is.

Poe’s room. Falleen’s base. They are back to safety. Right. She must have dozed off for the first time since they got out of that mess on Bespin.

 She turns her head and looks at the sleeping figure on the bed. His colors have returned and if she used the force over him, she would find that his vitals are stable.

 Almost on autopilot, she extends a hand and takes his.

That was a close call.

Too much of a close call.

What would have happened if the governor had completely fulfilled his plan? Where would be Poe, now? Would he still be breathing? She grits her teeth, feeling the control over her abilities slip once again.

_Not now…_ she thinks, taking several hard breaths then putting her abilities once again under a tight mental lock. She shuts her eyes and immediately gets a brief flash of that beach. That landscape has been her companion for years but she never saw anyone associated to it, until now.

And now, it is associated to him and…

Before she can give it anymore thought, she feels his fingers move under hers. Her eyes once again bolt open and she squeezes his hand, her heartbeat picking up.

« Poe? » She barely recognizes her voice. Has it ever been that fragile and insecure, before?

 He groans. It’s low, guttural and so him. His head turns and before he tries opening his eyes, his tongue slowly wets his lips. He suddenly freezes then sits up straight, looking disoriented.

« It’s all right! » she stands and puts her hands on his shoulders, pushing him back down. « You’re safe. You are in the mining facility, on Falleen. »

She sits on the side of the bed then takes the cup full of water she brought with her and, grabbing the back of his head, she helps him drink from it.

One sip. Two sips… there. He is taking it.

She sets the cup away and looks at him, a wicked smile forming on her lips.

He takes several deep breaths then looks up at her in confusion. « Kira? »

« The one and only. Did you miss me?» It’s so easy to slip back into her smuggler personality now that he is awake. Yeah, it’s easier to be like this…

She expects him to laugh but he doesn’t. Instead, he grabs her hand.

« My friends? » he inquires, his eyes unable to leave her face.

« Here as well and recovering. Your friend Finn is already up. »

He nods then she sees something switching in his eyes. She can’t exactly define what it is but it calls to her. Pulling over her hand to bring her closer, he wraps his free arm tight around her.

Her head naturally finds its place against his shoulder as if it had always been destined to rest there.

Kira ends up trapped against Poe and as she brings her legs up on the bed to makes herself comfortable, she realizes that this is probably what she wanted all along.

« I don’t know how we survived, but whoever it was, I’m glad they brought us here.» He mumbles against her hair, his arm wrapping tighter around her.

_I don’t know how you survived either_ , her inner voice screams, and another wave of anger directed toward the governor crashes over her, only to be momentarily dimmed by Poe’s lips against the top of her head.

« I wouldn’t have had it any other way. » She whispers against his shoulder.

***

**Abandoned mining tunnels - Falleen**

« Ben… Ben? » Adara kneels and puts a hand over his shoulder, offering him a cup of water.

He is looking straight in front of him, as unmoving as a statue, and she knows he is entirely focused over his own projection in Rey’s room. His eyelids flutter a little before he can focus his attention on Adara.

She hands him the cup that he immediately takes and empties. He feels no interest in feeding or drinking, but he knows he has to keep his presence strong to be a beacon for Rey, so instead of arguing each time he is cut by one of his knights for those physical contingencies, he accepts the situation.

She takes back the cup and holds it against her, studying his face like she never dared doing before. « Is there any change? » she asks after a while.

He looks back in front of him, projecting himself again, being at the same time in the cave and in Rey’s room. He barely shakes his head. « No. »

« She will eventually wake up. She just needs to have the toxins flushed out of her system. » she says, her tone gentle.

« She needs force healing, » he states, his voice a bit raw.

« Kira said the resistance is on its way with a doctor. » she tries, keeping her tone peaceful.

« We would go faster with force healing, » he barks, yet Adara doesn’t flinch.

She knows enough about Ben to understand that he is currently hiding desperation behind this angry outburst. He has been there, once before, after the temple and after realizing his own uncle had tried to kill him. He never talked about anything family related after that, but she always felt like it was the final stab in a long line of personal wounds, that one being perhaps the deepest and the widest of all.

She stands after a while and joins Nervan, Jelan and Daine who are in the far end of the cave and already trying to come up with a plan to get out of this mess.

« How is he doing? » asks Nervan as he offers a hand that Adara immediately takes.

« I’m surprised he hasn’t moved yet.  Had it been you there and me here, I would already have fought my way through anyone trying to stop me from getting to you, » she states with honesty.

« He knows that if he goes, he is taking the risk of blowing Kira’s cover, » replies Daine, his sandy blonde hair falling in front of his ice blue eyes.

« The bond is stronger than any strategy, Daine. It’s not something you can resist to or reason,» replies Nervan, his arm now snaking around Adara’s waist and his eyes not leaving Ben.

« Yeah, but he is the leader, remember? » cuts Jelan, his fingers traveling over another device he is currently configuring.

« It doesn’t matter. There is nothing stronger for him than what he shares with her. You saw them on Bespin. They were silently communicating. Adara and I can’t do it at this level. » Nervan turns his head and kisses the side of Adara’s head, feeling her confusion at Ben’s reaction.

« Do you realize what that means? » ponders Daine, as he turns to look at their master. « That means He has now a weakness. »

***

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Med quarters**

Finn has been the first of their group to wake up. Years of training and enduring the hardship of the stormtrooper’s training program obviously made him stronger. This is the first time he finds a perk related to this part of his life.

He only has a few memories of the last moments before losing consciousness back in that room. He remembers the door finally opening, more than likely being ripped from the wall, given the horrible screetching noise that came with it. Then several heavy steps, Rey‘s name being called and orders being barked by a voice.

He knows that voice too well.

Kylo Ren’s.

He can’t exactly remember the words but he knows the meaning was to pull them all out of the smoke. He remembers hearing a piercing scream after that, a female one, behind a modulator, then nothing anymore.

His mind is a whirlwind as he sits next to Rey’s bed. How can he be awake and her asleep? Aren’t Jedi supposed to be stronger and better at everything? He reaches out and takes her hand, studying her sleeping face.

She looks like a regular young woman. Nothing in her face can betray the fact that she is probably the strongest being he knows, given her abilities. Yet, when everything is shut down, she is just that girl he met on Jakku tagging along with BB8.

Seing her that vulnerable, that human, is almost a relief for him. Lately, he has been under the clear impression that she was something else, something he would never understand. But in that bed, she is just herself and nothing like what everyone expects her to be.

« What are we doing to you, peanut? » he finally asks, his thumb rubbing her fingers.

***

**Cloud City - Bespin - a few hours later**

Armitage Hux steps over the dozens of stormtroopers’ corpses as he gets in front of quarters 17.

He turns his head and spots the panel that was once the main access door before it was ripped off its mechanism. He had been specific about it. Everything, from the openings to the walls had to be completely reinforced to resist to the abilities of a force user.

He moves close to the hole left in the wall and rubs his fingers over one of its edges, seeing the metal bent in a way that should have been impossible to achieve with only muscular force. This, and he was certain of it, was the result of a combined Force use like his father sometimes mentioned in his stupid stories about the Sith and the Jedi.

_So, Ren came to the rescue with his fanatics,_ he thinks, his eyes narrowing.

He steps into the room and immediately sees the mess over the walls. Given the number of burnt marks, the Jedi girl probably tried attacking them with her lightsaber. 

Hux gets to the center of the room and barely turns his head toward the guide who ushered him to this level. « The governor? »

« Reported missing, my lord. » says the man, his eyes slightly lowered.

« The force supressant? », adds Hux, a vein pulsating against his temple.

« It was hidden behind that panel. » The man points at a gaping hole in the wall, the reinforced durasteel having been torn apart as if it was paper.

Hux slightly grit his teeth, his eyes now injecting with blood « The negotiations data? »

The man’s stomach lurches as he spots the demented look Hux is giving him « The negotiation room and the nearby recording room have both been torn apart then destroyed by fire. There is nothing left, my lord. »

Hux barely nods then looks back around, sighing. « Well, I guess I should hold governor Dorkin responsible for a failure of this magnitude? »

The guide slightly lowers his head, pondering about the kind of appropriate answer he is supposed to give.

His thoughts are cut short by the blaster bolt he takes right between the eyes, courtesy of a very upset self proclaimed Supreme Leader.

Hux storms out of the main space to join the hall.

« I want a full report listing the people who were in that city at the same time as Ren and the Resistance. I want to know the kind of ship they were flying, their allegiance, Everything! » He barks at his stormtroopers escort before stepping over the bodies once again.

« And activate Dorkin’s internal tracker to see if we can locate him! He has answers to give! »

***

**Star Destroyer Abrogator’s wreck -  Falleen – Middle of the Night**

Wrapped in a cloak, Kira slides into one of the gaping holes on the flank of the large wreck settled a few miles from the base.

She controls her fall with the force, her senses completely open to make up for the lack of lights. She slightly bends her knees, anticipating the end of the slide, and once her feet touch the floor, she immediately stands without a problem.

The force is already distorting around her and she is widely aware of the fact that she is once again losing control. She walks over what was once a wall and vaguely asks herself what the crew felt when the gravity generator went dead and the ship went down, spiralling throught Falleen’s atmosphere.

She takes a turn left and hears some ragged breath, her fingers flexing on instinct.

Coming into the large space of what looks like a partially decaying old control room, she spots the governor, laying on his side, his mouth still covered and hands and feet still bound.

His sweating bald head turns when he hears her. She removes the hood from her head and the look of relief he gives her nearly makes her laugh. Another one fooling himself with her young face.

She comes closer and crouches in front of him, her head tilting.

« There is so much of the universe you don’t know. » she says, her tone almost mesmerizing.

« So much beauty hidden behind ugliness. »

She pokes a finger between his eyebrows, her voice becoming slightly menacing.

« And so much darkness hidden behind harmless faces. » Her lips curve into a cruel smile and this is when Dorkin understands that the young beauty in front of him is potentially deadly.

« Ah… yes… you get it now. » she says, the force distorting even more around her and the partially torn panels around them starting to shake then bend.

 « Double crossing at the same time the legitimate First Order and the resistance was a bold move. I’ll give you that. However… » she states, a finger flicking and his windpipes constricting.

« I am afraid you made a very bad choice when you decided to work for Armitage Hux. »

The governor’s face turns red and Kira takes delight in the trashing moves he makes.

As if this would allow him to set himself free.

As if this would allow him to fight back.

« Shhhhhh… » She says, her tone now deceptively peaceful. « You are not going to die just yet. There are so many answers you have to give me first. »

The subsequent glare he addresses her makes her darkness sing and as she crawls closer and sits in front of him, she already knows that she will get all she wants, perhaps even more… and that he will scream.

***

**Mining facility - Med quarters/ Abandoned mining tunnels - Falleen**

Ben stands once he is sure he is completely alone in the tunnels, his projection in Rey’s room walking slowly to join her side.

He knows she is alone but can’t explain why… it’s maybe an echo of the minimal perception of her environment the Force is allowing her to have as she sleeps.

Her face is pale despite her natural tanned skin tone and she has dark circles around her eyes. He slowly brushes a thumb under one of the dark marks. She shouldn’t look so exhausted. She shouldn’t be threatened or put under pressure like that.

The Jedi, the Sith… Darkness, Light… The Resistance, the First Order… is any of this really worth risking to lose her?

His thumb delicately travels down her cheek, his eyes following the path taken by his finger.  

« You have been so brave. » he softly says in a voice he barely recognizes. « You are always so brave while I am a coward. »

His hand slowly turns, and he now brushes his knuckles down her shoulder and over her arm. « It can’t happen anymore. I am going to end this. For you. »

His head slightly tilts and he takes her unmoving hand in his, watching how her small fingers fit against his large ones. « I won’t tell you that what you have seen in the force visions are just possibilities. You make me want to believe that everything is set in stone. »

His thumb delicately rubs over her knuckles, his skin marking each scar he is finding there. « No matter what happens, Rey, I’ll always come back for you. But for now, they are right. I have to go.»

He focuses back on her face, feeling the too familiar tightening of his chest. « I leave you in good hands… you can’t understand for now, but someday, you will. »

Slowly, he bends and rests his lips over her forehead, his eyes shutting.

***

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Sunrise**

For the first time in her life, Kira is scared of watching her brothers and sister leave without her.

She spots their ship taking off in the distance and she follows the light of its reactors until it disappears outside the planetary atmosphere.

Something has changed, not just in her or in Ben. They are a unit and they all depend on one another. Graith couldn’t conform to that and she knows this is what ultimately led him to betray them all.

 

She went straight to them once she was done with Dorkin. They didn’t question the blood covering her clothes, nor did they ask how she extracted the tracker from his body.

She gave them all the data she gathered from the governor’s mind and in return, Ben explained what they had agreed upon doing next. They would all return to the fleet and plan a massive attack on Ilum and she would have to stay behind to keep track of the Resistance moves.

He didn’t have to tell her why things had been decided that way. She knew. He wanted Rey out of harm way and for this he was willing to lose the logistical support the Resistance could provide even if it would have probably made a difference in the outcome of that massive showdown.

She didn’t say anything because the irrational part of her, the one having visions of a beach warmed by twin suns, fully agreed with this.

There are pilots you can’t allow to take flight for certain missions and yet there are brothers and sisters you have to let go with the hope it will be enough.

A trade for a trade. Isn’t that what the force always requests?

***

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Med quarters - Sunrise**

Her eyes open at the exact moment he exits atmosphere, the feeling of loss immediately crushing her chest.

_Ben…_

A million of feelings assault her at once, but she is too weak to compartmentalize them like she is used to. She doesn’t know where she is. She can’t remember what happened just yet. All she knows is that in that moment of weakness, she needs Ben.

Physically. Mentally. Emotionally.

_Rey._

_Come back._

_I will, sweetheart. But not for now._

She feels the phantom of a touch against her cheek and she knows that he can feel she is crying.

_Please…_

_Stay safe, my love._

The determination in his voice scares her, and as she feels the small connection shut down, she allows herself to cry like she never cried before.

* * *

 


	41. Hell will be paid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! 
> 
> Sorry for the long delay, but this part was a tricky one and I had to do some major rewriting to be as faithful to the characters as possible. Hux tends to make me nervous and writing him is a bit difficult especially when I am seeing him do things I really don't want him to! Anyway, I forgot to mention it here, but I am also on tumblr under the name KylandaDragan. 
> 
> I hope you'll like this part! Have a nice evening, everyone!!!

* * *

**Part 41 : Hell will be paid**

**6 days after leaving Falleen**

**Planet Zelno’s orbit**

**Resurgent-Class Subjugator - Hangar bay**

Daine is the one who either has the courage or the madness to do it. He stomps in the hangar bay and heads straight to Ben’s Tie–Silencer.

« You are not going in. »

Ben is already unceremoniously dropping his cape on the floor and getting in the cockpit, acting as if he had heard nothing.

All the alarms suddenly go off, and Daine momentarily turns his head before looking back at his master who has already initiated his checklist.

« Get back on the bridge and make sure you are finding an escape route for the fleet. I am going to blow up that FUCKING tower. » barks Ben, his eyes carrying the same darkness they were having right after Skywalker’s attempt on his life.

« You can’t do this alone! » replies the blonde knight, clearly frustrated.

Ben presses two buttons, the cockpits slowly closing. He then gives a very dark and powerful look to his knight before saying: « Watch me. »

Once the sequence is complete, Daine knows there is nothing else he can do. He steps back and watches as Ben takes off, then turns and races back to the bridge.

*******

**Falleen**

She has felt disturbed since the beginning of the day, but she knows that those feelings are partly someone else’s. She has tried again and again to contact him for the past few days , but the force never accepted to connect them.

Either that or he closed the door on her for a reason she ignores.

She is zoning out again, right in the middle of that important tactical meeting.

No, she can’t let this happen. They will again tell her she is in no condition to be part of the planning, and she knows that she has to be there!

She has to be there because she needs to make sure they will make the right decisions… also for him.

« Rey, are you all right? » asks Leia while putting a gentle hand over the young Jedi’s forearm.

There is obviously so much she can hide…

Everyone around the table is silent. Finn watches her with concerned eyes, Poe  is looking between her and Leia. Even Kira is looking at her, but in a way that makes her feel slightly uncomfortable, as if she was expecting something past her current physical reactions.

« It’s nothing, Leia. » replies Rey, giving the older woman a soft smile.

« Let’s take a break and have a small walk outside. » adds the general. « I think fresh air will do us both a lot of good. ».

« All right everyone. Let’s meet again in 15 minutes. » says Poe a little too fast as he flashes a soft grin to Kira.

*******

**Resurgent-Class Subjugator - Main Bridge**

Nervan raises a hand and silences all the alarms as he looks at the scenery unfolding behind the duraglass.

« How many are they? » asks Adara who is standing next to him.

He shakes his head, moving his eyes from one part of Hux’ fleet to the next. « Difficult to say. They use some cloaking devices. They are waiting for us to come out in full. They want to corner us. »

Outside, the battle is raging, and hundreds of tie-Silencers are engaged against their virtual twins in a fratricide match that might never see a winner. Moving in pulsating waves, like those huge groups of migratory birds from Naboo, the small ships twist, turn and fire at one another without mercy.

« I haven’t been able to stop him. » says Daine as he sprints on the bridge and stands next to the consoles. « Locate the Supreme Leader’s ship. All our battle stations engaged and ready to cover his Tie-Silencer. Full ahead after him and make sure you remain within range. »

« Yes Sir. » replies the tactical officer while relaying the order.

« Any news of Jorath ? » Daine tries, giving a side look toward Nervan. 

« Not yet, and it’s not a good sign. » The darkness in the voice of dark haired knight casts a layer of tension over the whole bridge, all the commands between the officers being kept now at their minimum level.

« How long until the time is up? » the blonde knight flexes his fingers in order to adjust to the shifting he is currently experiencing in the force.

« 9 minutes. » replies Adara after checking the timing over the portable holopad she has tied over her left wrist.

Daine nods. « We are going to need to find an escape route for the fleet within the next 9 minutes. »

***

Outside, there is no longer up, down or left and right.

As Ben pilots his Tie-Silencer through the battle, he has cut himself from all the unwanted perceptions registered by his brain, only to focus over the essential: the Force’s guidance.

He knows he doesn’t have much time left to get into Zelnog’s athmosphere and disable the tower settled in its equatorial line.

***

**Falleen**

The walk outside is a silent one, with Leia holding Rey’s arm as if she needed support, both women knowing that  this is far from being the case.

« I still think we should run more tests. »

The statement comes out as blunt and out of the blue, but as much as she respects Rey’s independent behavior, Leia knows that at this particular moment she needs to be stern.

 « I’m fine. » replies a very pale Rey, Falleen’s air obviously not helping much. She slightly pinches the bridge of her nose her eyes losing focus from time to time.

« You aren’t. » says the older woman while wrapping a comforting arm around the Jedi’s waist.

Rey shakes her head and takes a deep breath. « No. It’s not what you think. » she says once again, dropping her hand and her eyes instinctively moving toward the sky.

_How could anyone think about something like this_? Rey muses, her chest tightening.

« Then explain to me why you suddenly stopped walking and started swaying as if you were about to faint? » Leia won’t let it slip. Not this time. She has sworn herself to not overlook another child, and she will hold onto that promise. She settles in front of Rey and cups her face with both hands, forcing the young woman to look at her.

« Talk to me. What is it? »

Rey reluctantly turns her head to look at her and what Leia sees in her eyes is something that deeply confuses her.

Fear.

« Something is shifting in the force. » Rey doesn’t recognize her voice as she lets out that piece of information, the sound being almost strangled.

« I don’t feel anything. » replies Leia.

« Not for us. » adds Rey, her eyes turning back toward the sky.

_Ben… Ben, please, give me a sign. Let me know you are all right._

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

The sight of a massive battle is satisfying.

Hux takes pride in watching his forces engaging each enemy fighter without holding back, no matter the potential cost for them. This is what a soldier should be.

This should be their pride.

Their ultimate goal.

The meaning of their life.

The corner of his lips slightly turn up in a very disturbing grin adorning a cruel and empty gaze.

The little improvements he made in the stormtroopers conditioning program are obviously efficient beyond all expectations, and as he watches some critically damaged tie-fighters just throw themselves at the turrets of the Subjugator, he sees himself as already victorious.

His men will die for him. And really, who can beat an army devoid of any self preservation instinct?

« Sir, General Tregor is waiting for your command. »

The ensign stands stiffly behind Hux, his hands behind his back and eyes slightly lowered. Words have been spreading among the ranks of the regular army that meeting his eyes could be a cause of immediate execution.

This time, Hux doesn’t turn back. He merely throws a hand up, his focus entirely over the battle in front of him.

« Tell him to stand back for now. The traitor’s fleet is exhausting itself. »

He can already taste victory, as another one of his men destroys another turret.

A life for a canon…

« But he said the Subjugator is on the move.» The ensign grips his hands together tighter, hoping this comment will not earn him a blaster bolt between the eyes.

« That is the beauty of everything, yes. Do you know why it is on the move, ensign?» asks Hux as if he was having a random conversation.

« No, sir. » answers the man after swallowing the excess of acidity in his mouth.

« Their so called Supreme Leader is out there.  Facing my troopers. He is reckless like that. Believing in his so called powers. Thinking they can make him get out of any situation. »

Hux watches as another turret is going down, the defense system of the Subjugator being now severely impaired.

***

**Resurgent-Class Subjugator - Main Bridge**

« 3 minutes, Kandar. » says Adara as she joins him at the communication console.

Daine looks at the communication operator and nods. « Do it again. »

The operator nods and tries again to connect through a special channel. « Lord Jorath. This is the Subjugator, do you copy? »

Statics… Daine despises statics!

« We would have needed Tarath for this. » he spits, and immediately resents himself for saying this, but his instinct is too strong and he knows that Kira is a vital part of their team. A vital part that could make a difference and that could very well be their downfall right now.

« Tarath is busy somewhere else. » cuts Adara before turning and checking on the current battle. « We should join the supreme leader instead of staying here. »

« I have an escape route. » says Nervan from the opposite side of the bridge. He then looks at the operator next to him and nods. «Send the coordinates to the fleet and ask them to make the jump right away. »

***

Ben’s Tie-Silencer does a barrel roll on the left before diving and coming back up. He doesn’t even acknowledge the fact that he is pressing the button to activate his canons. Yet he does and each shot is hitting its mark.

He needs to get into the atmosphere. This will be their only chance to destroy this major thorn on their side. They had known Hux was up to something huge, but once they got the information about what was currently under construction there, they had no choice but to immediately attack.

They couldn’t afford to let Hux have this kind of power.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« Ah… there he is. Do you see it, ensign? the way the Subjugator is trying to protect that Tie-Silencer ? It’s a sign. Kylo Ren is in there. »

The smile forming over Hux lips is extremely disturbing and the ensign finds himself regretting the time, not so long ago, when the Supreme Leader was an old and damaged force user. Snoke had been terrifying.

Hux, devoid of powers, is even worse.

« Activate the tractor beam and kindly invite this ship on board. » Barks Hux, his body remaining stiff as his gaze follows each and every move of Ben’s vessel.

But before anything can be done…

***

His body is on autopilot. Following his command, his ship makes a large flip backward before diving toward the planet in fast motion. His eyes shut as the force helps him raise a shield around the whole Tie-Silencer, all the laser blast thrown at him being immediately deflected.

***

**Falleen**

Rey suddenly falls on her knees, one of her hands clutching her chest. Leia kneels next to her, her older face paling.

« Rey? Rey! Look at me! » Leia grabs the young woman’s shoulders and shakes her.

Rey is heavily breathing, her heartbeat suddenly speeding up as if she was under the effect of an adrenalin rush. She knows where the rush comes from. She knows that feeling so well.

_BEN!_

***

**Zelno**

His eyes bolt open, his hands remaining tight on the controls of his ship.

_Rey?_

He spots the tower and circles it once, feeling that the heavy shield around it is still efficient. Jelan must have failed.

***

**Falleen**

« He is here. » she whispers, while slightly grabbing Leia’s top.

_Ben? What’s going on? Why is the force shifting?_

She looks up at the older woman, silently pleading her to guess what she doesn’t have the strength to say.

Leia raises a hand and rubs Rey’s head slowly. « Ben? »

And then, she understands what she feels. She knows what it means. She has to go to the other side.

« He needs me. » Rey closes her eyes and surrenders to the Force and its command.

She collapses in a heartbeat in Leia’s embrace.

***

**Shielding station– Zelno’s orbit.**

Jelan checks his work one last time before nodding and pressing a button over his wrist communicator.

« I’m here. » He says in a calm tone, his eyes set over the newly configured console in front of him.

« Where were you? We have been trying to contact you for the past… » says a female voice in a high pitched tone.

« Relax,Tanoras. I still had 45 seconds, right? » he says, a bit arrogantly.

« How did it go? » interrupts Nervan, his tone always a bit cold when they are in operation.

« It’s ready. Did you doubt I could do it? »

« Kylo decided to get down there. Just do it. » orders Daine.

« Your wish is my command, my lord! » replies Jelan in a mocking tone and with that, he presses three buttons at once and goes to the duraglass to watch the result.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU LOST HIM? THIS IS ONE SMALL TIE-SILENCER AGAINST A RESURGENT-CLASS! THIS SHOULD NOT BE POSSIBLE!  » The vein on Hux’ temple is once again madly pulsating and the officer who just broke the news is already wondering if he is living his last moments.

« He… he went into the planet’s atmosphere. The variations in the magnetic field around the tower don’t allow us to efficiently track him down. »   

Hux nervously runs a hand in his hair then narrows his eyes, spitting as he barks his next order.

« Engage all our forces against the Subjugator. Kylo Ren may be hiding under Zelno’s atmosphere, we are going to cut his only way of retreating. Blast this Resurgent-Class into oblivion. »

 

***

**Zelno**

The shield suddenly dissolves in front of Ben’s Tie-Silencer and he now knows what he has to do.

Bringing his ship down, he lands then jumps out of it, his eyes staying on the tower. The magnetic variations around him are charging every fiber of his body, but he tries to ignore the strange feeling in order to focus over the task ahead.

He isn’t even sure he can bring that tower down on his own. How much power is he going to need in order to do that?

Rey materializes next to him, and a wave of peace immediately overwhelms him as he hears her voice whisper his name.

He takes a few seconds to memorize her face before looking back toward the top of the tower.

She looks between him and the tower, noticing the exhaustion written on his face.

_What is it?_ she asks before looking up at the yellow sky, scraps of metal from defeated Tie-Fighters burning as they enter the planet’s atmosphere.

_Something that needs to be destroyed._ He simply states without giving another explanation. He knows that the time is up and that he must make his move.

She finds herself to be eerily calm when a few moments before, on Falleen panic was threatening to overwhelm her. How strange…

_Where are we?_

_Zelno… Unknown regions. In Ilum’s system.I need to bring that tower down. I need to nullify its power with the Force._

She doesn’t know what he means but she understands now isn’t the time to ask. She comes closer and stands by him, taking his hand in hers. Their eyes briefly meet in a silent understanding then as one, they look back at the tower and raise their free hand, calling the Force to them.

***

**Shielding station– Zelno’s orbit.**

Jelan is punching several commands over the console in front of him, his eyes showing a wrath he rarely lets out.

« Kandar, find a way to bypass the Nebulon-K between you and the station and come within range. I am going to redirect the shield to protect the Subjugator! »

The noises at the other end of the line are anything but reassuring as explosions and statics are being heard over his brothers and sisters voice.

« There are more frigates materializing! We are not going to be able to do that! » Adara’s voice sounds strained and this infuriates Jelan even more.

« GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE SUBJUGATOR AND GO TO THE PLANET THEN! » He screams through his communicator, his fingers working in fast motion over the console. « I’ll come and get you with the shuttle! »

Another loud explosion and the communication line goes dead. Jelan raises his head and looks through the duraglass, the Subjugator splitting in half.

His vision suddenly turns red as he puts a hand flat over the cold material, his breathing turning ragged as he  focuses over the Nebulon-K standing between him and his family.

* * *

 


	42. Fallen Angels

* * *

**Part 42 : Fallen Angels**

**6 days after leaving Falleen**

**Zelno**

It starts with the feeling that something terribly wrong is happening.

His focus flickers as he keeps his eyes locked over the tower, and he tightens his grip around Rey’s hand because he knows she’s the best anchor he’ll ever have. He feels the force flow between them and around them, stronger with each second passing… but that’s not going to be enough.

That’s not going to be enough because something else is pulling him away from that task.

*******

**Shielding station– Zelno’s orbit**

Jelan breathes, deep at first, then harder… and harder.

His fingers are clawing the duraglass as his eyes remain locked over the Nebulon-K. Behind it, he sees the part of the Subjugator where the bridge is settled detach itself from the other half of the ship in a wrath of explosions and torn durasteel. Survivals capsules are already leaving the wreck, but he knows none of them will contain his brothers and sister.

Jelan barely lowers his head and lets his wrath feed him…

_They asked for it. They asked for this._ He tells himself as the dark side fully fills him.

He raises his other hand in a fast motion and suddenly, the Nebulon-K, who was on the move to fire a deadly shot toward the bridge, stills.

Jelan’s breathing comes out in harsh pants, but he doesn’t care.

He will use the last of his vital energy if he has to.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

The only thing Hux dislikes in space combat is the fact that he can’t smell the scent of the battlefield. That mix of heated up durasteel and burning liquid coolant… The clear odor of fear and of men struggling for the life about to leave them…

He can’t remove his eyes from the two parts of the Subjugator now drifting toward the planet, attracted by the gravity of that peculiar yellow ball. One of them is devoid of any light, besides the ones caused by the occasional explosions from deep within its core. The whole life support system has collapsed, which has meant instant death for thousands of traitors who have chosen the wrong side.

The other part of the Subjugator still has life in it. He can tell from the emergency capsules leaving the remains perhaps with the hope for mercy?

« Shoot the capsules. » says Hux in a deceptively calm tone.

« Sir? » tempts a communication officer, his eyes over the dozens of small life support units probably hoping to be rescued according to the war rules.

« Shoot the traitors. » There are no rules anymore. Not for Him. Not if he wants to beat Ren.

War is a dirty thing, but once he is done with it, he will bring order to the galaxy.

According to his own rules.

***

**Shielding station– Zelno’s orbit**

Jelan turns his wrists in a very slow motion, blood running from his nose. His eyes don’t leave his target and the Nebulon-K slowly turns to face the Dominator, while the still living part of the Subjugator plunges toward the planet’s atmosphere.

Releasing the Nebulon-K with one of his hands, Jelan extends his arm toward the console, the screens suddenly displaying hundred of data in a fast motion. He flicks two fingers, the lights in the station changing and a loud alarm being heard as the whole facility shakes then starts moving.

 

***

**Zelno**

Ben loses his focus the moment a giant piece of wreck enters Zelno’s atmosphere. From where they are in front of the tower, it is impossible to know what they are looking at and yet, he knows in every fiber of his body that that this is the very reason why his hold on the Force to destroy the tower is faltering.

Rey looks up at the falling fortress and slightly lowers her hand, feeling her own control of the Force slip.

_It’s a Resurgent-class_ she says after a while.

He takes a harsh breath next to her, his hand dropping hers as his eyes follow the fall. This couldn’t be… no… this couldn’t be… them?

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« Can anyone tell me why the Nebulon-K is not following the wreck to terminate it? »

The impatience in Hux’s voice makes some of the operators on the bridge skin’s crawl. Most of them have watched in disbelief the emergency capsules being shot and they are slowly realizing that the man commanding them will stop at nothing, including at killing them if one of them voice any concern.

The body of the communication operator who dared asking for confirmation of that controversial order is still bleeding on the bridge for all to see.

« We are trying to contact them, sir. »  replies the operator who immediately took his position after his fallen comrade. « Nebulon-K, this is the Dominator. Why are you not following the wreck to terminate it? I repeat, why are you not following the wreck to terminate it? »

Loud statics are being heard, and then several alarms, as a rushed voice comes up without any holographic feed to back it up. « This is commander Rion. We have lost control of our main operating systems. We believe we have been sabotaged! »

« Impossible! » barks Hux, his right hand closing in fist. « Find the source of the problem and solve it, then go after that wreck and make sure you tear it apart! »

« Sir. » cuts an ensign after a loud alarm comes up. « We have a problem. »

Hux turns on his heels to glare at the man. « What. Problem? » he says through clenched teeth.

***

**Shielding station– Zelno’s orbit**

The shielding station has made half a revolution and is now pointing its giant antenna toward the Nebulon-K. Waving again two fingers, Jelan initiate the shielding process, a huge blue beam forming then hitting the enemy Frigate before forming a shield around it.

Jelan now sounds like he is gasping for breath, blood still flowing from his nose. He releases the control over the station and points his second hand again toward the Nebulon-K, his eyes displaying a darkness he never had, even under Snoke.

« Dodge this. » He spits, as all the turrets suddenly fire toward the Dominator.

Falling on his knees after making sure the Force would hold the Frigate’s system for him, he takes a few moments to breathe and centers himself.

The surface. He has to get to the surface and see if his brothers and sister have survived.

Standing, he stumbles toward the hangar bay where his shuttle is waiting for him.

 

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« All systems engaged! Shields up! We are under fire! » Screams a tactical officer as he punches several buttons.

« WHAT’S GOING ON? LINK ME TO RION! » yells Hux, madness threatening to swallow him.

« The Nebulon-K can’t be reached anymore, sir.  The ship appears to be under the shield generated by Zelno’s station and it jams our communications. » says the new communication officer.

A particularly nasty bolt hits the Dominator’s shield, and the bridge shakes for a while, knocking Hux off balance.

« DESTROY THAT STATION RIGHT AWAY AND IF THE NEBULON-K KEEPS FIRING, TAKE IT DOWN! » he barks, infuriated. Ren is within his grasp! He is not going to lose him for some malfunctions!

***

**Zelno**

Rey watches with horror as the giant mess of metal and wires sinks down, remembering the huge craters from Jakku that other fallen star-destroyers left in their wake. They will be too close to the impact…

He will be too close to the impact.

She looks at him, seeing shock written in his face then grabs him and forces him to look at her.

« You have to get back to your ship and take off ! Now ! » She frowns, seeing his eyes turn again toward the ship.

_What’s wrong with him?_ she wonders before grabbing him and shaking his shoulders the best she can, considering the size of his frame and hers.

 « Ben! The shockwave will kill you! Listen to me! » She needs to make him react!

« Help me. » He looks at her, devastation filling his eyes. « Please. »

« I’m trying! » she says, misunderstanding his request at first.

And then, she gets it and turns to look at the wreck following its seemingly slow course toward the ground. She looks back at him and raises a hand, brushing her fingers over his scar. Succeeding something like that would be a miracle.

But when they are together, isn’t that what constantly happens?

***

**Falleen**

**Mining facility - Governor Kira Sandeco’s office**

Kira is nearly crushing her communicator in her hand as she is standing in front of her office’s large duraglass window, her eyes turned toward the sky. She asked for a moment of privacy - pretexting some urgent matters to settle with her smuggler contacts - and rushed away from Poe’s side to try and contact her family.

She keeps doing the same sequence. 

Jelan.

Nervan.

Adara.

Daine.

None of them reply.

Jelan.

Nervan.

Adara.

Daine.

She shouldn’t be here. She should be with them. She should have left Falleen as soon as she understood they were going to raid that catalisation tower. It was far too dangerous for their team to be divided because it was certainly a trap.

Jelan.

Nervan.

Adara.

Daine.

She looks at the ground level and spots Leia holding Rey against her. What does she see? What does she know? Could she tell her what is happening to them, hidden in the unknown regions?

Jelan.

Nervan.

Adara.

Daine.

She presses the buttons more furiously as if that could physically shake the other knights out of their silence.

A knock at the door… she takes her time to answer, the disturbance she feels in the force preventing her from composing her usual smuggler mask.

The thing with Poe Dameron is that he is arrogant, anything but patient, and when he has a hunch, nothing in the universe can keep him away from trying to find what it means. So he enters the room, uninvited, and as Kira turns, startled, he can see in her eyes that what she hides it truly eating her.

He closes the door silently, without removing his eyes from her and in this moment, she knows she will be unable to hold anything back. She is hurting and she is scared in a way that she experienced only once before, one night when she was 13…

He closes the space between them in record time and takes her in his arms, bringing her head against his chest. His chin rests on the top of her head and when he feels her slowly returning his embrace, he allows himself to relax.

« If I ask you what’s wrong, will you tell me? » he whispers against the top of her head.

« If I don’t, will you hate me for it? » She replies against his chest.

« No. » he adds, rubbing his hand against her back then wraps his arms tighter around her when she feels her sink a little more against him. « But it’s never good to face bad things alone. »

« Sometimes, there are no other choices. » she says, her tone a bit cold.

« We always have a choice. » Poe brings his hand up and grabs her chin, making her tilt her head, his peaceful brown eyes meeting her green orbs. « I don’t care where you come from or what business deal exists between your group and mine. »

_If you truly knew…_ She thinks, the weight of her lightsaber hidden within one of her jacket pocket becoming more noticeable.

His thumb slowly drags under her lower lip then he puts his forehead against hers, his eyes shutting. « I’ve never felt anything like this before, Kira. »

« Neither have I. » This, at least, she can say without feeling dishonest.

His lips find hers, one of his hands craddling the back of her head to bring her tighter against him.

***

**Zelno**

Ben brings Rey in front of him and grabs both of her hands, entangling their fingers.

They both take several breaths, synchronizing their heartbeats, the Force starting its dance again all around them.

_Being one is the key_.

They both hear it at the same time as the force ghosts they met on Odessen materialize next to them.

_Feel as one, command as one,_ says Revan as he looks toward the falling wreck.

Rey decides that she doesn’t need to rely on her eyes. She closes them and tightens her hold over Ben’s hands, the only things she truly feel being his breathing movements behind her and the strong and steady beating of his heart behind her shoulder blade.

Ben keeps his eyes strained over the wreck, guiding their hands a little higher. He suddenly feels it.

A total control of the force around them.

A power beyond anything he had experienced before, even through the ultimate darkness taught to him by Snoke.

_Yes, this is exactly what you need to do,_ says Bastila, her ghost form shining brightly. _Now, take a hold of the wreck, Ben Solo._

Ben keeps his breathing steady, the force flowing from Rey through him and until the very tip of his fingers.

Together, they feel at first the heat of the wreck, then its size… so massive and yet not so frightening anymore in front of the power they are summoning around them. Ben’s eyes darken as they both turn their palm up, the wreck seemingly slowing down.

_That’s right. You are feeling it. Now, hold it back._ Revan’s ghost form keeps his eyes on Ben, searching for any sign of loss of control.

Rey opens her mouth and takes a deeper breath, immediately followed by Ben.  She closes her fists and he wraps his hands around them then brings them back against them in a very slow motion. In the sky, several loud cracks are being heard as the wreck seems to change its course, its speed decreasing steadily.

_Don’t let go. You are almost there,_ adds Bastila, her eyes on the wreck.

Their body start shaking in unison, the amount of power they are channeling to keep their hold on the wreck becoming progressively harder to handle.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

Another laser blast is hitting the shield as the Dominator sets a course toward the shielding station, all its avoidance maneuvers until now having failed.

Grabbing the back of a seat to stay up, Hux is seething. He hears the officers communicating back and forth to try and escape from the predicament they are in yet all he sees is the potential loss of a good chance to trap the fanatic before it is too late.

He needs to get Ren. He needs to have him judged, then formally executed in order to become indisputably legitimate at the head of the First Order. He won’t accept to have in his way a shielding station gone rogue and a sabotaged Frigate!

« CALL OUR REMAINING MANDATOR IV! BOMB THE STATION! » He yells and looks through the duraglass, the Dominator shaking from time to time under the assaults of the Nebulon-K.

In his rage, he fails to see a small shuttle vanishing into Zelno’s atmosphere.

***

**Zelno**

_Keep your balance, Ben Solo. Remember, Passion sets in motion what peace cannot,_ advises Revan as he looks at Bastila.

_Anchor him, Rey. He needs you as a beacon of light to stir from the darkness. This will be his greatest strength._ Softly adds Bastila, in a way that immediately resonates within Rey.

She slightly opens her hands and turns them, their fingertips touching.

Suddenly, they both feel a shift in the Force and as one, they project their hands toward the wreck as if they were invisibly grabbing it and lowering it. Both start shaking in unison, their knees giving out - hers first, then his - as the wreck heavily lands a mile away.

They both fall back, Rey partly on top of Ben, her vision turning into a blur. She tries to speak, but no words are coming out. Ben slightly moves a hand, feeling hers near, but before he can grab it, she vanishes.

His head slowly turns as darkness takes him at last.

***

Jelan lands his shuttle once the shockwave has settled down, halfway between Ben and the wreck.  He stumbles out, his face covered with traces of blood then falls on his knees. Swaying a little, he slowly stands then stumbles toward his master, who is probably responsible for slowing down the wreck’s fall.

Reaching Ben after a while, he falls on his knees and shakes him.

« Ben. » his own breathing is ragged and he fully expects a few health problems in a near future, given how much of his vital strength he compromised to manipulate the station and the Nebulon-K.

Heavily sitting on the ground and without much hope, he takes out his communicator. Given the proximity of the tower he fully expects to see it being useless.

He looks at it and frowns when he realizes that it is fully functional.

Kira. He must contact Kira.

***

**Falleen**

There is nothing demanding in the way he is kissing or touching her.

Right now, he is a beacon of comfort and warmth in a way she never experienced before. Poe’s lips slowly drag against hers, and it’s like she falls into an alternate reality, where this is just her, him and the intense feeling of serenity he is bringing her.

Her free hand move up to entangle in his dark curls, and she is the one who makes everything shift. Moving on the tip of her feet, her lips press harder against his and she almost forgets to keeps a tight hold over her force powers, especially when he suddenly pushes her against her desk.

Then the atmosphere changes in the room and where it was gentle and almost reverent, his touch becomes wild and consuming. Setting the communicator on her desk, she fully grabs his head with both hands, bringing his face tighter against hers.

Their breathing becomes a mess as he bites her lower lip and he barely laughs as she serves his the same treatment, her whole body shaking against his.

Then she suddenly stops and puts her forehead tight against his, her eyes remaining shut.

« Not like this. » She whispers, her fingers dragging over his face. « There is much you need to know about me, first. »

« I told you, Kira. I don’t care. » Says Poe, his callused hands rubbing her cheeks and his smile being nearly irresistible.  « You are more important to me than your origins. ».

He bends his head and covers her lips with soft kisses, enjoying the feeling of her skin under his fingers.

« POE! » screams Finn from behind the office door.

In a heartbeat, the pilot pulls back and runs to the door, opening it in a fast motion.

Behind it, stands a terrified Finn. « It’s Rey! She is convulsing and her nose is bleeding! Leia doesn’t understand why! »

All the colors drain from Kira’s face as she hears the former stormtrooper. Her eyes fall over her communicator right on time to see it being activated. As Poe runs after Finn, she presses the three buttons she was desperately using earlier.

« Jelan? » Her voice is strangled, her free hand tightening in fists.

« Kira… » his voice is weak, and his breathing ragged. « Zelno… you have… to come and… get us on… on Zelno. Trap… we lost the ... Subjugator. »

Kira looks straight in front of her, the color of her green eyes slightly shifting. « Are you with the others? »

« Ben… don’t know… for the others… »

Her head slightly lowers, her eyes falling over the wrecked Star Destroyer she can see from her office and where Dorkin’s body is currently rotting. « Hux? » her voice turns low, and eerily calm.

« On orbit… he won’t… let go. »

« Hide with Ben. Try to locate the others. I’ll be with you soon. »

* * *

 


	43. Decisions

* * *

**Part 43 : Decisions**

**Falleen**

 

« She is no longer convulsing, but I have checked her eyes and she is unresponsive. » says doctor Kalonia in a hushed tone to a very worried Leia as they are near the door in the room where Rey has been settled.

« What happened to her? Do you think this is linked to what she experienced a week ago with the force suppressant?» replies the general in the same soft and gentle tone.

« I don’t know, General. » whispers Kalonia with compassion.   « I have never really treated Jedi before. »

« Jedi. » Leia lowers her eyes and slightly nods then focuses again over the doctor. « Thank you for your help, Harter. Let us hope she will wake up soon. »

The doctor nods and gives the general a sympathetic pat on the shoulder before exiting the room, only to have to deal with the questions of a very worried Pilot sided by a very worried former stormtrooper.

***

The next few hours are critical for Kira.

There is what she would naturally do… sink in full into the dark side, board a shuttle and fly as fast as she can to Zelno to create havoc and try to save her family. That path makes sense to her, but it is the one where she potentially loses everything: her brothers and sister because this would put the odds definitely against them, and Poe, through the revelation of her true nature.

And there is what she carefully crafted, with the little bit of clarity that hasn’t been shattered when she heard Jelan’s weak voice.

In that reality, she has already prepared her trip to Zelno with a very well equipped shuttle and she contacted what was left of their fleet to assess the status of their force.

In that reality, she has to believe Jelan will have the strength to find her missing brothers and sister and to bring them to safety along with Ben while that disgusting red haired womprat is still on orbit trying to destroy them.

In that reality, she is going to be able to leave without Poe guessing who she truly she is… Because this is too soon and she wouldn’t be able to explain to him why she became who she is, and why it’s not as monstrous as what he thinks and…

Because truth is, she isn’t ready to lose him yet.

When she crosses his path in the hall leading to Rey’s room a few hours later, there is a fire in his eyes that she knows well and she can’t help but think that they aren’t that different, despite him being a resistance fighter and her being a First Order darksider.

« How is she doing?  » She asks, even if she already knows the answer through the force.

« She’s still asleep. We don’t know what’s happening to her but it’s perhaps one of those Jedi things. »

Kira slightly lowers her eyes and barely nods before looking back at him. « Can I see her?  »

He looks a bit confused by her request but if that disturbs him, he doesn’t show it. « Go ahead. »

She nods and walks past him but doesn’t go very far. He grabs her wrist and she instantly turn to look at him. His look has slightly softened, his thumb playing with the tender flesh right under the inside part of her hand.

She looks at what he is doing, because she feels her resolve slowly dissolve and staying with him would be so easy…

« I stand by what I said, Kira. When you are ready… »

She barely nods, the simple circular motion in the inside part of her wrist bringing her a strange soothing sensation. « Someday I’ll tell you everything. » she whispers, the tip of her fingers slowly stroking his own wrist.

He moves closer and kisses her forehead before releasing her and walking away.

She knows she isn’t lying. If she survives this war between Hux and them, she will try to make him understand why at 13, she made a decision that forever changed her life. She’ll try to show him that even as a darksider and even with all the evil deeds she has done, she remains the one he is falling for.

She just hopes it won’t shatter everything between them.

***

**Rey’s room**

She enters rey’s room when she is sure the last jedi is alone. She closes the door and forcelocks it before turning and getting close to the bed. Even with her abilities under a strict control, she knows that Rey’s force powers are completely asleep. She feels nothing of the usual vibration coming from her and this makes her very concerned.

_If Rey is cut from the force, is that what is happening to Ben too ?_ she wonders, her chest tightening at the idea.

She gets close to the bed in slow motion and finally stands next to it, looking down at the woman who is slowly healing Ben.

Strange how she is able to define Rey that way.

A few months ago, the universe had a different shape and they were all on a different path.

Then Rey had collided with Kylo Ren. What had looked like a detail then was in fact a major event. One that could very well alter the path the galaxy is taking.

Ben had killed Snoke for her. He had never been able to free himself from their old master, no matter the amount of abuses, yet he had found the strength to free her when he realized she was set to die.

« It doesn’t always take major events to change the destiny of a whole galaxy, Kira. »

Kira freezes at the voice behind her. Looking straight in front of her, she slightly grits her teeth, her fingers flexing a little.

« Sometimes, a single person looking almost insignificant and raised on a wasteland can change it all. »

« You mean, like you? » She cuts, her tone cold.

« Like me, in my time. » Luke’s ghostly form moves from behind her to stand opposite of Kira on the other side of Rey’s bed.

« Are you here to tell me I am not choosing the right path? » There is a bit of an edge in her voice, and Luke knows she is currently fighting herself to not succumb to her anger.

« I am here to tell you to proceed with caution. She is asleep for a reason. She used too much of her inner strength to help him. »

« Don’t you dare. » she spits, her tone harsh and her eyes throwing daggers.

Luke’s ghostly form holds its hands together, his face displaying serenity. « It wasn’t a reproach. It was a simple statement. »

« I don’t need your guidance. You failed to provide it when I needed it most. You failed to help us all when we were struggling! »

« I tried to guide you away from the dark side.» He pleads, his tone serene.

That last statement opens some gates inside of her mind, and she is 13 again, afraid, wounded and angry. Angry not to be understood, afraid to see that they are all about to die, and wounded because… she isn’t a bad person! She is just different! and so are Ben, and Adara, and Jelan, and … 

«We didn’t need to be taken away from it! We needed to learn to handle it! You and your stupid Jedi moral still fail to see that there is darkness and light in all of us! You wanted us to snuff out this part of us, like a hypocrite because you were just as bad as the rest of us! »

 That master look he gives her infuriates her the most. How dare he! How dare he act as if he is the master again, and her the clueless padawan?

“You tried to kill your own nephew! Because of your stupid Jedi prejudice! What happened next in the temple is just a consequence of this! We didn’t attack! We tried to survive! I didn’t want to die! And neither did Ben!”

She realizes she is panting and she tightens her hold over her powers to keep them as dim as possible.

Luke has the decency to look ashamed when she mentions the killing attempt and he briefly lowers his eyes. « I know what I did, Kira. In a moment of weakness, I probed his mind and what I saw… »

« You saw exactly what Snoke wanted you to see! Your fear made us the monsters we have become! And I am not ready to listen one more time that I have to act differently! I do not need your guidance! I survived, without you and with my brothers and sister! We survived your precious padawans’ attempts on our life! We survived Snoke ! And we will survive Armitage Hux ! Without you! »

With that, she turns and puts a hand slowly on Rey’s temple, her eyes shutting.

She doesn’t see the worried look Luke gives her as he vanishes into his other realm.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

**Zelno’s orbit.**

They have lost the Nebulon-K  and Hux still doesn’t get how it happened as he looks at the floating debris through the duraglass. The shielding station has been equally destroyed which means the tower is now completely unprotected. However, the battle is won since him and his forces are the only ones on orbit.

His eyes move to the planet and his lips curve in a satisfied smile. Ren is stranded there. Alone. With no way to escape. The ground forces he sent as soon as the ordeal with the Nebulon-K was settled will certainly give him good news soon.

Armitage Hux can already taste his victory and he is sure of one thing. No amount of power can compare to the perfection that became his stormtroopers program.

No amount whatsoever…

***

**Zelno - Equatorial zone – uncharted cave**

Jelan pulls Ben’s large frame against the cave wall, then he kneels and once again checks his vitals. Despite his pale face and the cold sweat hitting him in waves, Jelan forces himself to remain awake. He knows their survival may very well depend on that.

« How is he doing? » Daine’s drawl cuts the silence of that cave. The blonde knight is holding his side and a big gash is bisecting his forehead in a way that will certainly leave a mark.

« Alive but his heartbeat is still too slow. » replies Jelan as he sits and turns his eyes toward the far end of the cave. There, Nervan has brought an unconscious Adara and he refuses to let them get close to check him, or her.

The woman’s face is completely hidden against her lover’s neck, and he holds her limp body between his legs so tightly that she is almost invisible against him.

Nervan is the only one relatively undamaged.

All of this, because Adara created a force shield around him when what was left of the Subjugator hit the ground.

If she doesn’t survive, he will never forgive himself for it. And for now, he will solely focus on her, trying to get the force to heal her, even if through his darkness he doesn’t handle too well this kind of power.

***

**Unofficial New First Order Headquarters – Merisee’s orbit**

**Resurgent-Class Anihilator**

Dopheld Mitaka has locked himself for a while in his private quarters, the pressure of the last few hours clearly getting to him. His promotion as captain after he decided to follow Kylo Ren over Hux brought him a lot more responsibilities, but he wasn’t ready to face what is currently happening.

The battle of Zelno has been harsh for everyone. It was clearly a trap and Hux’ forces have a technological advance that clearly makes a difference. Several of their assets didn’t return home because of that and words are spreading about the Subjugator being lost… with all its crew.

Mitaka can’t help but rub his mouth and chin, a nervous gesture that always betrayed his oversensitivity at the academy. He know that the technical teams are nearly done repairing the damages that have been done to the Anihilator during the battle of Zelno and that soon, they will be in condition to make a new move.

He didn’t choose Kylo Ren’s side lightly, despite the fear that man could induce in him. He has, after all, been nearly force shocked once, on board of the Finalizer, just because he was bringing some bad news. But Hux and his ways are beyond anything reasonable, and Mitaka often considered the idea of deserting after the destruction of Hosnian Prime.

He didn’t, out of fear of being caught and executed, but also because of something else.

Kylo Ren himself. The very man that scares him also fascinates him. Mitaka may be the perfect prototype of what an officer should be, with credentials above what his brothers in arms have and a real belief in the supremacy of what the army can be, everything goes down the drain when he looks at Kylo Ren and his knights.

This is when his hidden beliefs cloud his hard earned academic knowledge.

He now rubs his forehead and sits on his bunk, shaking his head. When the Anihilator bridge was blasted, with all its officers in it, the whole line of command was cut.  Fortunately, the auxiliary systems took over, and what was left of the high ranking people on board was gathered there.

There was no one above the rank of captain.

The last contact with the Subjugator solved this problem when one of the knights promoted him as commander and put him in charge before giving him the order to retreat with the rest of the fleet.

Here he is, in his quarters, alone to decide what the next course of action should be for a whole crew.

Here he is, knowing that their masters are still there somewhere, near or on Zelno and in danger. He can’t picture them dead yet. For him, they are another kind of beings, invincible if not immortals and if Hux doesn’t have them, then they are still out there, living but potentially struggling.

 Mitaka’s hand drops as everything becomes clear in his mind. Kylo Ren and his knights are the last stand in front of Armitage Hux and his forces. They need to come back. And he has to make sure it happens.

***

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room**

Kira doesn’t particularly like intruding into someone’s mind, mostly because she is very gifted for it. The first time it happened was at the academy, by complete accident, and this is how she discovered most of the padawans were seeing her as a freak.

She knows there is a price to pay for probing someone’s mind. You sometimes access some unwanted truths, and more rarely, you discover something that resonates in you so strongly that it can unsettle you.

And then, there are the moments when probing gives you the keys to do the right thing.

***

**Moraband - six years ago.**

He is having a bad night again.

It happens to him each night and becomes more and more violent as the memories distort to become something scarier.

Kira is relieved to see that the five others are able to rest because she wouldn’t be able to help them all. She comes close to where Ben is sleeping on the floor and she kneels near his head. His eyelids are fluttering erratically.

It has to be that nightmare.

She puts two fingers near his temple and immediately sees a flash of green, while hearing a lightsaber ignition. She closes her eyes, just in time to see a calligraphy set, knocked off by a flying lightsaber and then, a blinding mix of green and blue.

It upsets her, more than she can say and for many reasons. One of them being that Luke Skywalker betrayed them. A guide is supposed to help, not to destroy! He is supposed to understand, not to outcast! All of this is his doing, because he divided the world between the self righteous light users and the others!   

Merging with Ben’s mind is always painful, because everything he feels looks like an echo of what is in her mind. She doesn’t want him to be hurt, just as she doesn’t want to be hurt. Slowly, she locks away from his mind the strongest sensations of fear.

She doesn’t want him to forget. No. That would be too easy for Skywalker, for the self righteous monsters like him and for the rest of the galaxy being so eager to outcast what they consider to be different.

No, she will soothe him as much as she can, without damaging the reality of what happened, because someday, he will have the right to ask for retribution.

***

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room**

The images at first are blurry, but then, she sees a tower and she feels Ben’s presence.

Kira sharpens her focus, confused by the seemingly incoherent images she gets. Damaged shuttles entering atmosphere, then a lot of noise, and a massive piece of ship…

And Rey’s energy, merging with Ben’s as they are both channeling something stronger than  them.

Kira immediately breaks contact, breathing hard. She raises two shaky hands toward her temples and rubs them, her eyes remaining shut. Once she is sure she won’t be sick, she opens her eyes to look at Rey’s sleeping form.

She completely projected herself next to Ben. She saw his environment and could touch him.

She should be dead, given how much strength she used to achieve that and given what she and Ben did next, when this huge piece of ship entered atmosphere.

From those images she doesn’t know what happened to Ben or to her brothers and sister, but she gets a pretty good idea of their location since there are a few recognizable features there.

***

**Falleen - main conference room an hour later**

« My contact on Corellia sent some information about a new orbital construction site in the unknown regions. I have to get to him to negotiate the terms of the full disclosure of information. »

Kira purposely avoids looking at Poe as she delivers her line to Leia, knowing full well that the pilot is intensely watching her.

« This comes at a terrible time. » sighs Leia who once again feels the weight of the events on her shoulders. Seeing Rey in such a bad condition did something to her, whether it is destroying her confidence in the future, or simply triggering those old motherly reflexes that she believed to be long gone.

She remembers feeling this way at one particular occasion when Ben was 7, plagued by a fever that wouldn’t go away, while she was facing yet another crisis within the New Republic Senate. She distinctly remembers having to face her duty while wondering if her boy would be ok since no one was able to tell her what he was having.

« I know it does, but if I don’t go there immediately, the lead could very well vanish. » The lie flows out of her mouth with too much ease, and if she normally wouldn’t have any problem with this – this is Ben’s mother, after all and the one who pushed him away and feared him when he was just an innocent child  –, the weight of Poe’s gaze makes her feel everything differently.

Is she currently betraying him?

« Maybe that I should go with her? » says the pilot as he looks at Leia.

« If you come, my contact will retreat. He is one of those smugglers that want no contact with any official entity. If he so much as suspect my association with you, this line of information will be cut for good.»

Kira looks at him and holds his gaze, her hands tightening in fists under the desk.

He adresses her a devilish smile then adds, his tone a bit teasing: « I am very good at hiding. »

« You mean, with that newly customized black and orange x-wings? » She retorts, her lips slightly curving onto a smile.

« You noticed my baby, hmmm? I have put some work over the hyperdrive and also played with the…» he starts, looking like a child in front of his favorite toy.

« I think Miss Sandeco is right. » cuts Leia as she gives Poe a pointed look.

The pilot clears his throat then nods.

 Finn is observing the exchange from where he is, leaning against a wall, his arms folded and his eyes dark. Kira briefly looks at him then turns back toward Leia.

« Feel free to stay in the facility. I will be back as soon as possible. »

***

An hour later, Kira is ready to board in her shuttle. Under the standard travelling items are hidden her armor, helmet as well as a supply of parts to repair lightsabers and some extra weapons.

As she is about to walk up the ramp, a powerful hand stops her. She turns and ends up face to face with Poe, who is clearly invading her personal space. He addresses her one of his devilish smile and cups her face with one hand, his other arm wrapping around her.

« You’ll be careful, right? » he whispers, bending to rest his forehead against hers.

Her chest madly tightens and for a moment, she doesn’t know what to say to him… goodbye, I may not return… I am not the one you believe me to be… of course, I’ll always return to you…

Lies, her life is made of lies.

She settles for leaning closer and giving him a hard and slow kiss, her eyes shutting.

There are no promises and no words, therefore, no lies.

She pulls back after a while, way too soon for her heart, but she knows that she can’t delay her rescue mission any longer. She looks up at him, smiles and moves away before turning and vanishing in her shuttle.

Poe watches her take off and folds his arms once he can no longer see her reactor lights in the sky. Finn joins him and stops, watching the sky as well.

« She is lying to you. » He simply states and is not surprised when the pilot simply nods.

« I know. That’s why I installed a tracker in her shuttle. »

Finn lifts an eyebrow. « Does Leia know? »

« Oh yes. She knows. She is the one who suggested it. » Poe pats Finn’s back then heads toward his X-Wing. « Keep an eye on her while I’m away. I’ll send you data as soon as I have something valuable. »

Finn nods. « Hey, Poe. »

Poe turns, halfway up on his X-Wing, BB8 already in place. « Yeah? »

« Just be careful. »

***

**Kira’s shuttle**

Kira activates a few controls, preparing her shuttle for its hyperspace jump. She is 2 hours away from Zelno though the Fregian corridor and she knows she is going to have to calculate her course with extreme accuracy if she doesn’t want to end up crashing into an asteroid from the Fregian belt.

She keeps pressing a few buttons and then activates The First Order frequency to call their headquarters.

« Merisee, this is Tarath Ren. Do you Copy ? » She waits for a bit and as she is about to press the button again, she finally hears an answer.

« Roger, this is Merisee temporary base. » the voice at the other end of the communication is unsteady and she immediately frowns.

« I want to immediately talk to the highest ranking officer present the facility. » she commands, her eyes darkening.

Again, she hears nothing for a bit, and then, a voice that she knows quite well and that sounds suddenly relieved.

« This is commander Mitaka on the Anihilator. The fleet is on orbit around Morisee and waiting for your command. »

_Mitaka… a bit too soft, but really good when it comes to following orders_ , she thinks.

« Put the fleet on red alert. All our ships in fighting conditions must be prepared and sent to Zelno in 3 hours. The enemy forces are still in place and you are going to keep them busy while I attempt a rescue mission on the surface. Raise all your shields as soon as you exit hyperspace and engage the enemy without waiting for my order. Each second will count. How many forces in fighting condition do we have left?»

« Three Resurgent-class and seven frigates. » answers Mitaka, his voice a bit stronger than previously.

That will have to do.

* * *

 

 


	44. Revelation

Part 44 : Revelation

 

Hyperspace – end of the Fregian corridor near Zelno’s orbit.

 

Poe flips several switches in his cockpit as BB8 emits a serie of sounds.

« Yeah, Buddy I know. Just make sure our defense systems are engaged once we exit hyperspace. I really don’t know where she is leading us. »

Another series of indignant sounds comes from the droid and Poe rolls his eyes.

« It could be important for the Resistance. »

Several beeps and a long screeching noise cut Poe short. « All right. All right ! No need to get upset. We are just going back and forth. All right? »

Poe keeps his eyes on the small screen where his hyperspace tracker has been installed, courtesy of some smuggling groups working with Tash.

« We’re almost there. Get ready. »

BB 8 makes several sounds before engaging the weapon systems of Poe modified X-Wing.

« Exiting hyperspace in 3…. 2 … 1… »

Poe presses a button, the X-Wing’s speed decreasing to exit hyperspace. His eyes go wide as he makes his X wing flips on the left to avoid a huge piece of floating durasteel.

« What the hell? »he screams, while maneuvering his ship through the mess unfolding in front of him. « BB 8, locate Kira’s ship! »

Everywhere around him, Tie-Fighters are engaged into an intense battle taking place around several frigates and Resurgent Class Ships. BB 8 beeps and squeezing sounds become frantic.

« No, she’s got to be somewhere! The tracker says she is still here! Come on, Buddy! I need you right now! »    

Poe makes his X-Wings tumble to the right then dive when an alarm goes off. « They have locked on us. We’ve got to move! » Poe flips several switches, his X wing turned toward one of the frigates.

BB8 lets out an Anthology of screeching sounds before giving an insanely loud warning as the X-Wing gets hit by a laser beam.

« HOLD ON TIGHT! » Poe presses a button, the x-wing being suddenly propelled forward and toward a frigate.

***

Kira is engaging another Tie-Fighter when she spots something familiar out of the corner of her eyes. Before she can double check, an incoming transmission breaks her focus.

« This is commander Mitaka on the Annihilator. A resistance ship entered the quadrant! I repeat, a resistance ship entered the quadrant! »

She makes her ship accelerate in order to avoid one particularly well placed laser blast then moves it under a frigate, her eyes scanning the area.

_No no no no… that’s not possible!_ She thinks, her fingers tightening over the controls.

That’s when she sees it: a modified X-Wing, black and orange with a BB unit operating it.

_Oh, Dameron, what have you done?_

Kira opens a communication line, her eyes remaining over the speeding X-Wings.

« Commander Mitaka, This is Tarath Ren. The resistance ship is with me. I repeat, the resistance ship is with me! Relay the order to the whole fleet! I want this ship and its pilot protected!»

« At your command! » replies Mitaka, and already, Kira can see several of their ships moving in formation to engage the tie-fighters trying to take Poe down.

That’s the opening she needed. Poe’s presence on the battlefield obviously disturbed Hux’s forces who are currently gathering to try and get him. This leaves her the opening she couldn’t find for the past 10 minutes to slip past the defenses and speed toward the planet.

She slightly hesitates: the man she is growing attached to or her fallen family. There will never be a right choice but… some are needing her more than him. He is the best pilot of the resistance and she believes in him.

_Please, let him be safe_ , she thinks as she gets into the atmosphere and races toward the equatorial part of the planet.

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

 « Take down that resistance ship at once! » snaps Hux as he holds his hands behind his back. Ren’s fleet materialized 10 minutes before which forced him to redirect his forces in an emergency move in order to hold their ground around the planet.

He can’t afford to let anyone get to the tower and blast it now that the shielding station is gone.

« Sir, one shuttle took advantage of the confusion around that ship and forced our blocus. It is currently speeding toward the planet. » says a radar operator.

« NO ! » screams Hux, his face turning red and his eyes injecting with blood. « Send more stormtroopers to the surface and make sure the pilot is not leaving the planet! I want Ren to be found and brought to me! Do you understand? »

« Yes sir! » says the ground force coordinator before relaying the orders.

***

**Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge.**

Dopheld Mitaka is bending over a chart, putting his fingers over several parts of the planet’s surface.

« They have landed here, here and here. We are going to need to send troops to make sure Tarath Ren can do what she has to do without risking anything. »

He raises his eyes and looks at the 3 officers in front of him, looking perfectly calm and decided. « I need you to lead them. We need a strategic overview on the ground battlefield, or else, we might lose for good the supreme Leader and his knights. »

« We can do this. » replies one of the officers, looking confident.

« Then gather your teams and go. The sooner we bring them back on board, the faster we can go back to Merisee and to safety. »

***

Poe makes his x-wing twist and turn several times, and he can’t help but notice that some of the Tie-Fighters seem to be working with him.

_They probably got words to not engage with us when we agreed to enter the negotiations. Well, that’s good!_ He thinks, still making sure his ship is moving quickly and efficiently through the whole battlefield. « Still nothing on Kira’s ship, BB8? »

BB8 lets out three longs whining sound then a very loud shriek that made Poe nearly jump on his seat. « Where? »

Another series of noises later, Poe turns his x-wing toward the planet and presses another button, being once again glued to his seat as he speeds toward the equatorial part of the planet. « Thanks buddy! »

***

Kira takes out the communicator Jelan created for her and presses it.

« Jelan ! »

She hears statics for a while as she speeds toward the surface.

« Kira »

« I am here! Where are you ? »

She hears several noises then a few muffled sounds before Jelan’s voice cracks through the statics. 

« There is a hill about half a mile from the tower. We found an uncharted cave and we are hiding there.»

 « All right. I’ll find you. » she replies, pressing several buttons to initiate the landing sequence not far from the forest.

« Be careful. Stormtroopers have been dispatched on the surface to find us. »

« Don’t worry for me. » she says in a low and nearly sinister tone. « If they get close, they’ll regret it. »

***

Poe flips his X-Wing to the left while firing toward two tie-fighters, only to be helped by another group taking over for him.

« Ok, I don’t know what this is about, but let’s take advantage of this, buddy! Keep the tracker on over Kira’s ship; we are going to land close to her. »

BB-8 beeped several times before letting out a loud warning sound.

« Yes, I know, but we are going to find out what she is doing here.» Poe replied while flipping two switches. « Finn, this is Black leader! Do you copy ? »

The answer is almost immediate and Poe can perfectly imagine Finn keeping his communicator close since he has left Falleen. «Poe, what’s going on? »

« Is the general with you? »

« I am here, Poe. What have you discovered? » The unmistakable voice of Leia takes over and for a moment, Poe wonders how that woman always manages to sound so calm even when the odds are against them.

« I just exited Hyperspace after Sandeco and I landed right in the middle of a battle around Zelno’s orbit. Leia, The Finalizer is here. I saw it. »

« Are you engaged in that battle? »Her tone slightly changed to lean toward disbelief.

Behind her, Poe can hear Finn cursing and saying that he should immediately fall back and return to Falleen.

« Well I had to defend myself. But for now, I’m safe. Apparently, Ren’s forces have recognized my ship and they are fighting the others for me. I am getting ready to land after Kira. »

« Poe, find out what you need to then get out of here. » says Leia in her usual patient tone.

« You know me! » he answers, getting Kira’s ship as well as the ground in view.

« This is exactly why I told you this. » Poe is certain she said that while rolling her eyes as she always do when he aggravates her.

« Uh oh. Stormtroopers on the surface.  There is a huge tower and they are apparently gathering there. Got to go. Updating soon ! » Poe cuts the communication line then turns his  ship to make it follow Kira’s shuttle to the forest all the while trying to observe what’s going on in that location.

He sees the ship lowering to the ground then landing, then flips two switches. « Ok BB-8, we are landing close to her. Make sure all the systems remain in alert. We have passed a lot of ground troops. »

***

**Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

Commander Mitaka is now next to the communication console, his eyes remaining over the space battle unfolding behind the duraglass bay.

_There is an opening in Hux’ defense system,_ he thinks, a finger slowly rubbing over his lower lip. _He is sending troops to the surface, but they are left mostly unprotected. He is sending the Tie-Fighters against our frigates to blind us and keep us busy._

Not removing his eyes from the battle, he puts a hand over the shoulder of the communication officer. « Contact the frigates. Tell them to raise their shields to 100% and to send their Tie-Fighters after the troop’s transports. They are attacking our frigates as a decoy.»

« Yes, sir. » says the officer before relaying the order.

Another communication officer raises his head and looks at Mitaka. « Sir, team Alpha is ready to go to the surface. »

Mitaka detaches himself from the battle for a bit and looks at the officer, nodding. « Tell them to proceed. Our goal is to bring back the supreme leader and his knights on board. Nothing else matters for now. »

« Yes, sir. »

***

Poe jumps down and immediately puts his hand on his blaster as he runs toward Kira’s ship, hearing the characteristic noise of stormtroopers being near.

He goes faster once he sees the ramp being lowered then freezes when he sees one of the knights of Ren climb out of the shuttle. Frowning he instinctively move his eyes around before focusing back on the armored fighter.

« Where is Kira ? » Is all he can say, his hand slowly tightening over the handle of his blaster.

The knight doesn’t answer. He isn’t surprised, he has never heard any of them talk during all their time in cloud city. Or maybe that this is a challenge. The knight slowly walks to the side, like a predator, never turning his body away from Poe.

« I said, what have you done to Kira ? » That’s when he makes his first mistake. He raises his blaster and aims last the knight. In response, the knight lifts his hand and freezes Poe’s arm.

Poe struggles, clearly unable to get free of the force hold. His eyes darken as he grits his teeth. Suddenly, the knight takes his lightsaber with his free hand and switches it on.

Then, Poe makes his second mistake by screaming « Release me and fight like a man  if you dare !» he should have known that it would have attracted the stormtroopers but right now, all he can think about is that Kira is supposed to be in that shuttle, and that so far, he hasn’t seen her.

Hearing some noise, the knight turned his head, just in time to see stormtroopers reaching their location.

« Hold it right there! »says the team leader while raising his blaster toward the knight.

Following their leader’s example, the stormtroopers raise their blaster as well.

*******

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« Turn the Dominator and power up the battle stations. We are going to engage the frigates » spits Hux as he is observing the strategic changes in his opponent’s options.

« Sir, we have an incoming transmission from the ground forces. One of the knights has been located and is currently being surrounded. »

« Any sign of Ren ? » Hux’s voice lowers and becomes deceptively calm. Anyone not knowing him would say he is relaxing. But the underlying vicious edge is something well known by his men.

The communication officer knows better than to say something that could potentially upset Hux. He opens a communication line and immediately contacts the ground teams to gather more information.

 

***

That’s it. She doesn’t have any option left.

Why? Why has he followed her? Why has he put himself in danger like that?

« Drop your weapon. » commands the Stormtrooper’s leader.

Kira immediately narrows her eyes behind her visor. This is not going to go the way they think.

She and Poe are not going to be taken and she is going to get her family.

Now.

She redirects her extended arm from Poe to the team leader. Moving her hand into a fist, she twists her wrist, the team leader falling dead, his neck snapped.

Regaining his arm sensations, Poe immediately moves to one knee and turns, firing expertly at several stormtroopers.

At the same time, Kira flips her lightsaber and jumps, landing between him and the stormtroopers. She stops a few of the blaster bolts aimed at him then suddenly lifts her free arm, freezing the laser bolts in mid air before forcing them back toward the stormtroopers.

With a few fluid movements, she dispatches the remaining soldiers, standing after a bit in the middle of dead bodies.

She fails to see that Poe stood up and is now pointing his blaster at her.

« Where is Kira Sandeco ? » he asks, his voice cold.

She turns her head and sees in his eyes exactly what she is dreading. He hates the knights of Ren and anything attached to the First Order. He is going to hate her as well.

She disengages her lightsaber then raises a hand and presses the button unlocking her helmet. She will never be ready to face his judgment. She knows that. That’s the price to pay for having developed feelings for him.

She sees him adjusting his finger over the trigger. She knows that she can freeze his blaster bolt without even thinking about it. His weapon doesn’t scare her. What scares her is what he carries in his eyes right now.

Slowly she removes her helmet and drops it to the ground, watching it for a few seconds. She hears his breath hitch and she turns her head, just in time to witness the shock written on his face.

« She is here. » is all she can say, in a voice he knows so well.

***

**Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

Mitaka is standing in front of the main bay, his hands behind his back as he is watching the tie-fighters vanishing into the planet’s atmosphere to follow the troop’s transport. He then barely nods toward the communication console.

« Contact the frigates and tell them to remain on standby. Turn the Annihilator to face the Dominator and power up the frontal battle stations. »

Before anyone can acknowledge his order, he barely raises a hand to add one more request.

 « Link me to Hux. Audio feed only. » He says, his face betraying none of the tension he is currently experiencing.

« Yes sir. » replies the communication officer before pressing several buttons. « Resurgent-Class Dominator, this is resurgent-class Annihilator from the First Order regular Army. We have an urgent communication for General Hux. »

It takes a few seconds before the Dominator answers under the form of Hux’ cold tone.

« This is Supreme Leader Armitage Hux from the First Order. Your attempt at rebelling failed and your fleet is almost completely destroyed.  Surrender now or suffer the consequences of your betrayal. »

Mitaka’s head raises a little, his chin slightly tilted up as he listens to his former superior with an unexpected serenity.

« General Hux, this is Commander Mitaka, current leader of the First Order regular Army’s fleet. On behalf of Supreme leader Kylo Ren, I ask you to remove your forces from Zelno’s orbit at once. Enough lives have already been taken for your failed coup. »

« Kylo Ren and his followers are traitors to the cause and will be punished accordingly. Only an honorable death will be able to redeem their sins. » sneers Hux, his tone obviously relaxing after recognizing Mitaka.

_He underestimates me_ , thinks the commander, a small smile forming on his lips.

***

It takes Poe a while to lower his blaster, not because he is afraid of what she might do but because nothing seems relevant around him anymore.

His brain keeps checking that this is truly her in the knight’s disguise.

For a few seconds, he fools himself into believing she is just his smuggler having stolen this fancy armor and the lightsaber going with it. But he has seen her use the force. He has felt it.

And he doesn’t need any more lies in his life.

« I wanted you to find out differently. » she tries, her fingers slightly gripping the handle of her lightsaber.

His breath hitches at her statement. He wishes he could bite her with a smart retort just to make her feel as uneasy as he feels but a part of him refuses to do that. This part knows she has been trying to tell him something but never found the way or the right time to do so.

He’ll give her at least that before considering who she truly is.

« Please, say something. » she pleads, anguish in her green eyes and right now, it’s not an enemy he has in front of him.

Can she revert to being just an enemy? He looks away, slightly shaking his head.

« It’s not as bad as you believe. »  adds Kira, hoping he can at least hear her out.

« Of course not, hmm? You are a knight of Ren and we are on opposite sides ! » Poe spits, his eyes shining with some very carefully controlled anger.

She would have jumped at his tone, but the residual adrenaline from her previous encounter with the stormtroopers is still present in her system, and this is enough to ground her.

They both look up when they hear the sound of approaching cargo ships and she ignites her lightsaber again.

« Don’t be ridiculous! » He screams at her to cover the noise. « There are at least 30 stormtroopers in each shuttle! We can’t take down that many people just the two of us! »

« I know! » she screams back, her eyes not leaving the ships. « There is a cave entrance somewhere on that hill. We’ve got to find it without being taken! »

Poe turns toward his ship and looks up at his astromech droid. « Raise the shields, BB-8 ! Don’t let yourself be taken! »

Poe is rewarded by a series of loud beeps, immediately cut by Kira.

« I have better than this! » With that, she kneels and puts a hand on the ground, a vibration being barely felt but making the whole area extremely uncomfortable. She then stands and looks at Poe. « Follow me. »

She then runs past him, heading toward the hill.

« What the hell was that? » asks the pilot, feeling slightly dizzy as he lets her guide him.

« Magnetic distorsion. I’ll explain later. Come on ! »

***


	45. Resolve

* * *

 

 

**Part 45 : Resolve**

**Falleen – Rey’s room**

 

Finn doesn’t truly know what Leia thinks of what he asked. For now, the older woman is standing next to Rey’s bed, holding the young woman’s hand and observing her sleeping face as if nothing was weighting on her mind.

Reality is different and for each tiny rub Leia’s thumb makes over Rey’s hand, the general ponders and she ponders hard.

She is convinced Poe won’t return without Kira. She knows that hot head enough to understand that he will go to extreme lengths to protect this woman. What she can’t forget is that he landed in the middle of a space battle involving the two sides of the First Order, which means, something important has to be there.

It means also that it has to involve her son. Is that why Rey is unconscious?

« Leia, I am sorry but we have to make a decision. » Finn says in the quietest tone he can use despite the adrenaline rushing through his system.

The older woman nods and looks at him, resolve in her wise eyes. « Contact the base. Give them Zelno’s coordinates and ask them to send the fleet at once. I want Dameron out of this mess and I want to know why the First Order is fighting there. There has to be a reason. »

***

**Zelno**

The difficulty isn’t to climb the hill while crossing the thick forest. Poe is used to efforts. Being a pilot, despite what everyone thinks is a very physical thing, where the ship becomes an extension of the body. A lot of people within the resistance often tease him about his way of modifying his X-Wings, but never the pilots, because like him, they know that in order to survive, you have to become one with your ship’s mechanic. 

There is a commotion behind them in the distance and he is vaguely aware of the fact that there is currently a ground fight not involving them.

Kira stops in front of a solid wall made of rocks and looks straight at it. « Here we are. » she says, her tone betraying the tension in her body.

Poe stands next to her, frowning. « How do we get in there? »

Without a word, she grabs his wrist and pulls him with her to the wall, until they go through the force illusion one of the knights is projecting. Releasing his wrist, she takes off and follows the tunnel, feeling her family near.

***

   **Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

With 60% of its battle stations firing at the Annihilator at once, The Dominator is clearly being at the forefront of the current battle. With a twitch of his lips, Hux appreciates the current view. Soon enough, the transports will be destroyed within atmosphere while his mother ship will take care of the Annihilator’s pathetic remains.

« Give me the status of their shield. » Asks the ginger haired man, the taste of victory already in his mouth.

« They are losing power, Supreme leader » answers the tactical officer after scanning the Annihilator’s defenses.

***

   **Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

 « Starboard engine 10% until our nose turns. Battle stations at the ready, on my command. » calmy says Mitaka as he is watching the scenery behind the duraglass. He can see that the Dominator is not reacting to this subtle move, his fingers slightly flexing.

His next command is a little more unexpected. « Lower the ventral shield’s power to another 5% »

« Sir? » asks one of the operating officers.

« Do it. Another 5%. » confirms Mitaka, the officer immediately obeying the command.

« Port battle stations aimed toward the Dominator’s main bridge. Starboard stations, ready to cover the frigates. Contact the frigates captains. Full ahead until they are under then behind the Dominator.»

« This is the Annihilator bridge. Full ahead. Take position under then behind the mothership. We are covering you. » relays the communication officer before receiving confirmations.

Mitaka’s eyes remain focused over the Dominator while he counts in his head.

Three …

Two…

One…

***

   **Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« Sir, the frigates fleet is currently on the move. » the tactical officer observes the ships on his radar. « They are in formation. »

Hux slightly chuckles, which makes the skin of the people around him crawl.

_Mitaka’s basic mistake. How academic of him,_ he thinks with pride. _The basic rule of escaping a battlefield when being overpowered… sail close to the enemy ships so that their weaponry becomes inefficient._

« Redirect our complete firepower over the frigates. Turn them into stardust before they get under us. » He nearly growls the end of his sentence.

« Yes, supreme leader. » replies the tactical officer as the order is being once again relayed.

***

   **Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

_He took the bait,_ acknowledges Mitaka once he sees that the Annihilator is momentarily left alone.

« Redirect all our shield power toward our ventral canons and turn them toward The Dominator’s bridge. To all the battle stations, Fire at will. »

The communication and tactical officers both relay their orders. The rest of the bridge remains completely silent except for the occasional vital informations being relayed, everyone being clearly aware of the fact that they are all taking a huge risk by renouncing to use their defense system.

Mitaka briefly holds his breath until the first laser blasts hit the Dominator’s shield in various positions from the port side, and over the main bridge from the ventral canons and the starboard side.

*******

**Zelno – uncharted Cave**

The walk through the narrow and dark tunnel is performed in complete silence. Kira holds her ignited lightsaber in front of her to light their path, which bathes the rocks and dirt with a deep red glow, as if everything was covered in blood.

Poe’s grip over his blaster is firm, but the weapon remains desperately pointed toward the ground. He can’t analyze what he feels. Part of him refuses to associate his Kira with what he has in front of him. The other has troubles putting all the pieces of the puzzle together.

And there is that cave.

Why is she leading him here? What is she planning? Does he know her at all?

The tunnel finally widens and in the distance, Poe can see the golden glow going with the use of emergency light capsules. She didn’t bring him to safety. She brought him to meet someone.

Kira suddenly takes off and before he can react, she is already at the end of the tunnel, dropping her lightsaber. He sees her shoulders slightly slump and her head barely tilting.

By the time he joins her, she is cautiously walking in the main space, her eyes moving from one person to the next as if she couldn’t decide which one to go to first. Poe remains at the entrance, confused by the scene in front of him.

On the left side lays an unconscious Kylo Ren, another man sitting next to him with his head resting against the cave wall and his eyes half closed. That one looks at Kira and slightly smirks before raising two fingers to greet her.

Then there is a blonde guy tightly holding his own side. His face is unnaturally pale and he is obviously in pain. Yet, when he spots Kira, his face relaxes as if half of his concerns were instantly being lifted from his shoulders. « I knew you would find a way to come to us. » he says, and through his tone, Poe can feel that his smuggler also means the world to that man.

Kira barely nods then her eyes fall over a man holding what looks like a woman’s body so tight that it’s almost impossible to tell where one starts and where the other finishes.

« Adara. » She whispers before joining the last group and kneeling next to them. Slowly, she puts her hand over the man’s shoulder, trying to get his attention. « Nervan… Nervan look at me. »

Raising his head very slow, the man meets Kira’s green eyes and from where he is, Poe can see the rage burning in him. « She protected me. » He says before lowering his head again against the woman’s neck.

« Let me check her. » Tries Kira but the man doesn’t move.

« He’ won’t let you. » says the blonde man before closing his eyes.

Kira crawls to him and kneels, removing his hand gently from his side. « You can’t stay like this. » She states before putting both her hands over the wound and focusing.

« Don’t » says the man before gritting his teeth. « Jelan is drained, and I can’t do much. With Adara and Nervan out of the picture, and Ben down, you are all that’s left to make it out alive. »

Poe doesn’t need to see Kira’s face to understand that she is conflicted. Her body language is explicit enough. « I have some bacta patches. » he offers, his tone neutral.

Daine meets his eyes and slightly nods before looking back at Kira. « Try to see if you can reach Ben. I’ll be ok. » He adds, putting his hand over the one she has pressed against his wound to heal him.

Giving a sharp nod, she lets him replace her hand and apply pressure before standing and looking at Poe. « Please, help him while I’m checking the others. »

Poe puts his blaster away in its carrier then comes closer and kneels in front of Jelan.

_Look at me. Behind the enemy’s line and trying to help a knight of Ren, he_ thinks, almost bitterly.

Daine shuts back his eyes and rests his head against the cave wall, not releasing the pressure on his side. « That’s what you get for mingling with one of us. » he says, pain filling his voice.

Poe reaches in the top pocket of his pilot uniform and takes out a bacta patch. Unwrapping it, he manages to remove Daine’s hand and to apply the sticky side directly over the wound. « Don’t get in my head. » he says, his tone remaining formal.

« I don’t. Your thoughts are too loud for us to filter them. » replies the blonde haired knight as he puts his hands back over the bacta patch. « Don’t be mad at her. She’s a survivor. »

Poe slightly flinches before looking toward Kira.

Sat on her heels, she is pressing her fingers against Ben’s temples, her eyes fluttering shut. Lowering her head, she is taking a big breath, connecting with Ben’s mind.

« What is she doing? » instinctively ask Poe without truly expecting an answer.

« She’s connecting to Ben. She’s the strongest of us for this. » mumbles Jelan from where he is.

« We don’t know what happened to him. » adds Daine, his voice a bit strained. « He’s physically unharmed but he isn’t waking up. »

« Like Rey. » States Poe with a frown.

Kira removes her hands after a bit, instinctively brushing a lock of hair from Ben’s forehead. « He worked with her. I saw it. They both broke the fall of the piece of wreck you were trapped in. »

« That’s not possible, Kira… if it’s the wreck that landed in the south part of the forest, it’s more than half of a resurgent class. » objects Poe.

« That’s what happened and they did it together. » replies Kira without looking at him. « They are force bonded. Like Nervan and Adara. And together, they are stronger than apart. » Kira raises her eyes and looks at Jelan, looking determined. « Rey is in the same condition as him. I’m not sure I can help him if they are apart. »

« Wait a minute. Rey is on Falleen. How can you think she had anything to do with what is happening here? » insists Poe.

« Their bond is powerful… » replies Daine while adjusting his position to hold the bacta patch a bit more tightly. « So powerful they can see and feel each other even when they are apart. »

« We can’t explain what it is. We just know it’s real and what I see in his mind is what I saw in Rey’s mind before leaving Falleen. » Kira turns to face him, expecting his anger.

Instead, his eyes land on the sleeping form of the man he knows as Supreme leader Kylo Ren. « She never mentioned anything like this. »

« That’s not the kind of thing easy to admit… consorting with the enemy. » cuts Jelan before rubbing his temples. « All right we need a plan to leave this forsaken place without being blasted with what Hux left on orbit for us. »

***

   **Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« Give me a full report of the damages! » Barks Hux as the Resurgent-Class is being shaken by yet another serie of blasts. « And power on all the frontal shields! »

« Sir, the bridge is holding up but we are sustaining heavy damages in the engine area. The hyperdrive is currently malfunctioning. » says the communication officer as he is reviewing reports from various parts of the ship.

Hux is fuming as he holds himself to a nearby ramp. His eyes set on the Annihilator, he momentarily forgets the tower on Zelno’s surface.

He will not let a weakling like Mitaka put his plan in jeopardy.

« Order to the whole fleet. Forget the frigates. All battle stations aimed at the Annihilator. Fire at will.  »

*******

**Millenium Falcon’s board, Falleen**

Leia is pacing in front of the hologram board, the lines on her forehead showing that she is lost in thoughts. The general hates those waiting moments. She used to be more patient in her young years, even if the fire burning in her was then overwhelming.

After a while, defeated, she sighs and sits on the lounge seat. Joining her hands in front of her mouth, she does something she had sworn herself not to do.

« I don’t have to wonder what you would have done, Han, because I know. You would have piloted the Falcon there, you would have been incredibly reckless and you would have saved all that mattered at the last minute, infuriating me in the process. »

Dropping her hands, Leia looks up and shakes her head. « I am so mad at you for being gone. This is not what should have happened and you know it. You survived Jabba’s treatment and the carbonite. You survived on Endor, you survived being confronted to Vader. You survived flying day after day in this piece of junk. You should have survived Starkiller too. »

She slightly jumps when a familiar howling sound echoes in the hall. Sighing, she stands and heads toward the cockpit. « I’m coming, Chewie. » She says, trying to ignore the burning sensation in her eyes.

Inside of the cockpit, Finn is communicating with the Resistance, an hopeful and yet tense look on his face.

« We will know what needs to be done once the fleet is on site and evaluating the situation. » he says while pressing a button on the console.

« They took the shortest course through the Fregian corridor. They should be there any minute now. 7 units sent by Tash. I’m sending you their security code so you can directly communicate with them. I am certain the general will want to give directly her orders. » replies Kaydel through the audio feed.

« Thanks, K. » Replies Finn before cutting the connexion.

« Let’s just hope we are not sending them into a trap.» says Leia before patting Chewbacca’s arm as he gives her a reassuring howl.

« Yes but you say that because you are as crazy as Han » she replies, a sad smile on her face.

***

 

**Zelno – uncharted Cave**

« I called back what’s left of the fleet and they are currently engaging Hux’s forces. If we play our cards right, that should give us enough time to leave the orbit and get into hyperspace relatively unscathed.»  says Kira as she looks at her companions.

« That doesn’t solve the tower issue. » mumbles Jelan. « If we miss our chance now, we are as good as dead. Hux won’t make the same mistake twice with an off planet protection for this facility. »

 « We are in no condition to take it down. » adds Daine, his hand still tightly pressed over his side.

Kira slightly narrows her eyes then stand and turns toward the cave entrance. Raising her hand, she focuses over the surroundings outside of the cave, her eyes shutting.

« Kira… it’s not possible. Ben could, but not us and you know this already. » Daine winces then adjusts himself against the wall, his eyes over their leader.

« What is that tower? » Asks Poe, his face completely neutral.

« It’s more than a tower. This is the visible part of a very complex device running deep underground and being powered by the planet itself. » replies Jelan with a nod of his head. « Hux and his engineers managed to create an efficient force suppressing technology. The devices until now didn’t have much range. With this facility, we are talking about force suppressing entire systems on the long run. »

 « How is that possible? » harboring a skeptical look, the rebel pilot gives a side look to Kira.

« Ever heard about the midi-chlorians ? »  she replies, not looking at him directly.

« No. What’s that? »

« In short, that’s what allows us to use the force. Force sensitives are born with a high count of midi-chlorians in their body. Hux’ technology kills them. And without them, we no longer have access to the force. Same thing will happen to Rey if we don’t destroy the tower. » Kira states, finding the strength to look at him in the eyes after a bit.

« if we destroy it, he’ll rebuild it. right ? » Poe’s question echoes in the cave and for a moment, he believes he isn’t going to get an answer to that question.

« His technology requires a huge amount of Neridian powder. He’ll never refine enough of that to rebuild a tower in a reasonable amount of time. We are at a crossroad. Either we give them the advantage and he’ll take us all down, or we take the upper hand and we stand a chance. » Somehow, the calm tone Kira is using is even more disturbing than all the discoveries he is making.

Aren’t they all at a crossroad for various reasons? Rey and her Jedi path, Finn and his destiny as a leader, the general who has to inspire a whole rebellion after having lost everything, Rose who is trying to give everyone hope despite her grief…

He looks at Kira, his smuggler or their knight, he doesn’t know anymore, and he knows he doesn’t want her to die. No matter what they are going to have to solve, she’ll need to live for that.

« You are going to leave the planet with your men and I’m going to take care of that tower. » he says, fire burning in his eyes.

« It’s not that simple. » cuts Daine, his eyes half shut. « You can’t take it down just with your X-Wings. For now, the tower isn’t operational, but it is still heavily protected. »

« Leave that to me. » Nearly growls Poe before looking at Kira. « You are going to get out of here and head back to Falleen. »

« Poe, you don’t have to put yourself in the line for… » She starts before being cut by a simple narrowing of his eyes. Slightly nodding, she looks back at Jelan and Daine. « All right, my shuttle is outside of the forest and we are going to have to dodge the stormtroopers units that landed after us. »

***

**Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

« Sir, the frigates are behind the Dominator. » warns the communication officer, a bit of tension in his voice as the Annihilator is rhythmically hit bit the bolts coming from the Dominator’s battle stations. 

_Excellent…_ thinks Mitaka before delivering his next set of orders.

« Bring our shields back up at 100%. To all the frigates, turn around and targets the closet battle stations. Fire at will. »

« Yes sir. » replies the tactical officer before relaying the new orders.

_Now we have to hold on until the ground troops find the Supreme leader and his knights,_ ponders Mitaka, his eyes remaining on the Dominator.

 

*******

**Millenium Falcon’s board, Falleen**

« Rebel command this is Green squadron arriving on site and in the middle of a battle. What are your orders ? » says a voice through the communication system of the Falcon.

Leia nods at Finn, her hands joined in front of her.

« Green leader this is rebel command. Get under channel 44 and send the identification code in order to be recognized by our allies. Then you’ll try to contact Commander Dameron to know of his whereabouts. Your mission is to bring him home safely.» Finn tries not to cough as he says that, their alliance with Kylo Ren’s portion of the First Order still leaving a sour taste in his mouth.

« Copy that. » replies the squadron leader.

***

**Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

« Sir, several X-wings and shuttles exited hyperspace in the east quadrant. We are receiving an identification code. This is the resistance. » says the communication officer, giving a side look toward his commander.

Immediately joining the console, Mitaka gives a nod to his officer. « Link me to their leader. »

« Yes sir. » replies the officer before activating some of his console’s control.

« Annihilator, this is Green Leader from the Resistance. We are requesting access to the planet for a rescue mission. » says a calm but stern voice through the communication system. 

« Green leader, this is commander Mitaka from the First Order regular Army. Your access to this quadrant is granted. We are currently engaged in battle on orbit and on the ground. »

« Copy that, Commander. We are going to avoid disrupting your actions as we perform ours. »

Mitaka looks toward the bay and at the Dominator which is sustaining some heavy damages despite its shields being raised.

« A black X-Wing is currently on the ground with some of our forces. » adds the commander, his eyes taking a special light as he sees one of the battle stations exploding into space.

« Thank you for the information, Commander, we are going in. »

Once the communication is cut, Mitaka slightly raises his chin, his eyes darkening as he keeps them turned toward the Dominator.

« Call back half of our Tie-Fighters. » he suddenly says. « I want them in close range to the Dominator and constantly firing at the turets. »

***

**Resurgent-Class Dominator – Main Bridge**

« We are losing power over one of our ventral canons! » yells the tactical officer before barking orders for the maintenance team, the bridge shaking from the constant assault from the Annihilator’s battle stations.

« Call for backup! Now! » Screams Hux, some of his hair falling in front of his eyes, his face red and his hands in fists.

« Sir, using the fastest hyperspace corridor to this planet, the closest part of our fleet will need one hour to get there. And it is only composed of a frigate and two light cruisers. » warns the communication officer, his face pale and forehead clammy.

« And what are you suggesting? » barks Hux, his hands shaking with anger. « That we back away from here? »

The tactical officer then stands, the current ordeal showing him that there is nothing for him to lose anymore. « In the current predicament, with the resistance being here, we won’t be able to save the Dominator. »

Hux turns, his teeth bared and his breath being labored. 

« Sir, we lost a lot of important assets during this battle. » adds the tactical officer, perfectly aware of the fact that his life hangs from one thread, given Hux’ current rage.

Looking back toward the bay, the ginger haired general flinches. He has his issues with Ren. He needs to get him and to destroy him in a public display. But the tactician side of him knows that this will never happen if he remains here.

Gripping the bar he is holding, he barks his final orders, refusing to see them as surrender… this will just be a delay.

« Set a course for the unknown regions. Ask the ground forces to keep searching for Ren. »

The tactical officer sits back on his chair, while the communication one relays the new orders.

Hell will probably have to be paid later.

* * *


	46. All about waiting

* * *

 

**Part 46: All about waiting.**

**Falleen, 4 hours after leaving Zelno**

 

She should have never left him there. It had been a very bad idea from the start but she hadn’t been in position to force him into any choice.

He owed her nothing, especially after discovering her darkest secret.

Still, having left him alone to destroy that tower, behind enemy lines on top of it is leaving a very bitter taste in her mouth.

The sky remains desperately black with no sign of an incoming ship and she hates it.

So bad.

Jelan joins her, his colors having returned even if he remains weak.

« You should get back inside. You used a lot of power to get us out of that mess. We all need to rest. »

She shakes her head, unable to detach her eyes from the sky.

« Kira. » his tone is a warning, this time.

« Don’t. » She hisses, her fingers slightly wiggling before putting her hands in fists.

He knows reasoning with her is useless.

***

**Zelno 4 hours before**

 Kira waves her lightsaber so fast that it almost looks like a blur to Poe as she progresses in the open field where both their ships are waiting for them.

Raising a hand, she deflects a blaster bolt then pushes away with the force the trooper powering up his Z6 Riot control baton but the pilot doesn’t have time to analyze what he sees, because he has his own part of the mission to fulfill. Rolling then firing at some incoming forces, he screams into his communicator.

« Power up the canons, BB-8 and cover us! »

Nor waiting for the series of beeps that are sure to follow, the pilot briefly looks toward Kira.

« See you at the meeting point! » he screams before standing and charging toward his X-Wings.

 

Kira tries to ignore the wave of worry crashing into her mind. Poe Dameron was a Rebel pilot long before he knew her. This is who he is and who she probably got attached to in the first place. There is no room in that scenario for some silly female worry.

They are soldiers. Soldiers fight and put their life on the line.

Fulfilling her part of the plan, she runs to her ship and lowers the ramp with the force. She has to get that shuttle closer to the forest to gather her brothers and sister who are cautiously progressing while remaining hidden thanks to the Force.

She only take a few seconds to watch Poe taking off and expertly firing at the incoming troops, providing exactly the shield she will need.

***

**Falleen, 4 hours after leaving Zelno**

**Rey’s room**

There are days where she feels like she can’t be a rebellion general anymore, everybody knows this.

Some blame it on Han Solo’s death, some on Luke Skywalker’s loss. Some even say that after all this time, the pain and sorrow is finally catching up with her.

Leia Organa has discovered the price of being a rebel very early in her life. Before that, she had this romantic vision of it where she was a princess and a senator, dressed in pristine dresses and bringing intel back and forth to feed the parallel organization her father had founded with a few of his friends as Palpatine created the empire. Everything was heightened by the fact that she wasn’t doing this alone, since she had her friend Amilyn with her to share those moments with.

Then Alderaan had been blasted into oblivion in front of her very eyes.

The reason why she didn’t fall apart after this was that group of misfits which rescued her from the Death Star when she was certain she was going to die. They didn’t heal her, but they gave her something else.

A strange surrogate family to replace the one the Empire reduced to ashes, and with them, she found the strength to go on through friendship and through love.

But do you really heal from events like the ones she went through?

Once it was all said and done, could she have put her rebel duty behind her? Could she have turned her back to a galaxy needing good hearts and so much energy to being rebuilt?

There was that fear… that fear of seeing the empire being reborn from its ashes.

And there was that thing she refused to talk about because in her mind it had no meaning.

Because in her world, she never was Vader’s daughter. She had no connection to him and he was just a dead monster, along with his master.

In her world, she would live happily ever after, with Han and their children, Luke would be here and he would bring the Jedi order back and the world would be once again as Bail Organa had described the Republic before Palpatine started playing sick games.

It had been all shot down in flames.

Her son laying on that bed right next to Rey is the harshest symbol she can get of this.

History had repeated itself and had taken away the most precious thing she ever had just because she had refused to acknowledge who she truly was.

Someone very capable, but traumatized by a war she had to fight too soon, bearing a reconstruction burden too heavy for her shoulders and that landed on her because she had been among the heroes, and who was ultimately Anakin Skywalker’s daughter, therefore, having the potential to transmit a high midichlorian count to her children.

Putting her fingers in front of her mouth, she feels her eyes fill with tears because the conflict in her is too strong and she is no longer able to handle it. She should hate that boy for killing the love of her life and for all the horrible things he did or let Snoke do over the years. But she also sees that scar on his face and the hollow shape under his eyes and over his cheeks.

He went through hell, just like her, just like everyone else involved in that war.

« He is not lost. »

Leia doesn’t turn when she hears the familiar voice behind her but she allows herself to let the tears fall, just this once.

« Oh, Luke, I am so tired of telling myself that. » she says, her voice strangled.

« I know you are. » her brother’s force ghost gently answers. « But you have to believe. »

« In what? » she scoffs, wiping her cheeks. « In the force? »

« In her. » he answers, getting closer to Rey. « He will fight for her. Then he will learn to fight for himself and at last, he will do it for the rest of the galaxy. »

« He is in a coma and so is she. They may never come back. » She gets that feeling of being too old once again, and as she lowers her eyes, she feels the phantom of her brother’s warmth behind her.

« They will. » He simply answers before vanishing.

***

**Zelno’s orbit - 4 hours before**

**Resurgent-Class Annihilator – Main Bridge**

« Sir, the Dominator is on the move. » The tactical officer presses a few buttons on his console then frowns. « According to its position and its current velocity, there is a high percentage of chance they are readying themselves to make a hyperspace jump. »

Mitaka’s eyes darken at the thought then barely narrow his eyes. « Set a course to come in their way. We must force them to remain here. »

The tactical officer does more calculations but shakes his head. « Given their speed, we won’t be able to settle in front of them. We are going to miss them if we don’t collide first. »

« Could we have any chance to do this with one of the frigates? » Adds Mitaka without much hope in his mind… the frigates are behind the Dominator and flying back in front of it in time it looks unrealistic even without the right calculations.

The final answer is exactly what he expects. « I’m afraid not, sir. »

Mitaka nods then lowers his head for a bit before looking back at the dominator through the duraglass. He could set a collision course with the Dominator just to prevent the jump, but that would mean endangering part of his own crew.

Mitaka isn’t Hux.

Mitaka would never reason like Hux and sacrifice hundreds of lives for a simple power display. He is going to have to let his former superior officer go with the hope they’ll be able to stop him soon.

« To all our forces, maximum fire over the Dominator. All aims toward the generator area. For those unable to reach this part of the ship, I want the aim on the reactors. » 

***

**Falleen, 4 hours after leaving Zelno**

**Med quarters**

Jelan doesn’t feel comfortable with the idea of being separated from Ben while rebels are in the facility. However, his current lack of strength prevents him from correcting this situation.

From the moment Kira helped him board on her ship, he felt the last of his strength leaving him. At some point, he will have to explain to his brothers and sisters what he has done on orbit to try and save them.

For now, his eyelids are heavy and against his better judgment, he is slowly falling asleep.

The faint sound of Nervan’s pleading voice as he begs his chosen to wake up is not enough to keep Jelan awake, and as he finally loses consciousness, his last thought goes to Adara, truly hoping she will manage to pull through, despite sacrificing herself to protect the man she loves.

He knows that without her, Nervan has the potential to become a soulless monster.

***

**Zelno 4 hours before**

« Say that again? » asks Poe as he makes a side flip with his X-Wings before blasting one of the Tie-Fighters having engaged him.

Another wave of quick beeps welcomes this question then two loud warning sounds.

Poe lifts his head then makes back flip, firing at the same time. « I saw them buddy! Thanks! Link me to Kira’s ship, now!»

More beeps followed by statics are being heard before Poe finally hears the sound going with an open communication line.

« Kira it’s Poe. You need to hurry up and take off, now. It doesn’t look good from where I am. There are ground forces heading your way and a lot of Tie-Fighters still operational. »

 He can hear at first Kira’s voice from a distance as she is obviously giving orders.

« Strap him on the cot In the cargo bay and make sure he is secured. This is going to be rough. » then her voice becomes clearer and Poe assumes she is now near the comlink  « We are nearly ready to take off. »

Poe makes another back flip and shoots a Tie Fighter from behind, the sound of the falling ship echoing loudly in the valley. « I’ll get to the tower as soon as you hit atmo. Just make sure you are heading straight to Falleen.»

« If you can’t take it down in full, hit at least the relay to cut the transmission line. It’s in the center of the building behind some heavily armored panels. » All of this is wrong and she knows it. That tower should have been fully taken down with the force and she should be at least trying, but she has the life of her family between her hands and some of them are holding by only a string.

« Copy that. Just focus on going home. I’ll be right behind you. » says the pilot, his tone serious. 

He knows who she is. And he is going to do this anyway when letting this tower being powered would be the most efficient way of taking her and her family down. This can count for something, right?

« Hey, Dameron ? » She says, after a pose.

 « Yeah? » he answers, still engaging multiple enemy forces as he tries to drag them away from the clearing.

« For what it’s worth, I didn’t like hiding from you. » she briefly shuts her eyes before turning and looking toward the cargo bay.

« We’ll talk about that when we are both on Falleen. Now go. » He says, his eyes remaining focused on the sky and not liking what he sees.

***

**Falleen, 4 hours after leaving Zelno**

**Kira’s office**

Daine should be out from the amount of painkillers they have given him before treating his wound, but he likes to think the Force keeps him awake in time of needs and this is one of those.

The set of angry brown eyes looking at him as he sits in Kira’s office doesn’t make him uncomfortable, far from it. Yet, he knows he has to carefully monitor his reactions, because they are all currently walking on dangerous grounds.

« Listen Pal, I don’t really care about any of you. In my book, you are all manipulators that used us for your own agenda and we probably should kill you on the spot. » growls Finn, his eyes narrowing.

« We didn’t use you per say. » replies the blonde knight, his hand pressing over the bacta patch supposed to increase his healing process. « We were certain you would refuse and alliance and there was no time to build some trust between us. Like we told you on Bespin, Hux has access to resources neither of us have. If we don’t fight side by side, then the galaxy will be done for. »

« Don’t use the galaxy to justify yourself! I know what you are all capable of. » The former stormtrooper stands and kicks his chair away before pacing in front of the desk.

« I’m not. » replies Daine as he shifts painfully in Kira’s chair. « We usually don’t form alliances.  It’s usually the six… well the five of us, now. » admits the blonde man as he turns his head toward the window.

« Ben trusts that Jedi woman » The words flow out of his mouth before he can question the safety of giving sensible information to a man seemingly ready to destroy them all. « There is that thing between them… »

« Rey. » cuts Finn, and he is perhaps not ready to discuss about that just yet. 

Daine simply nods before adding: « And she trusts him.»

Finn stops pacing, and the way he is glaring at the knight is piercing. But Daine, keeps his eyes out and after a bit, Finn realizes he is watching over Kira from a distance.

« The path we have taken. The choices we made. Everything led us here all at the same time and we all have our reason of staying. » quietly adds the knights in a way Finn finds disturbing. « She is not going to come inside until the pilot is back. Even if she can’t do anything for him from where she is. Do you have any news about him?»

Finn tenses even more. « No. He made contact with our green squadron saying he had a mission to complete and that he would be right behind them. That was the last time they’ve heard of him.»

***

Kira hears her communicator but waits for a bit before turning it on and even then, she doesn’t identify herself. It’s one of those moments where she can’t become Tarath the knight but where Kira feels like she has no real place in the universe. 

« This is Commander Mitaka from the Annihilator. The battle of Zelno is over. General Hux and his forces have retreated except for some ground troops that have been arrested and taken in custody. We are waiting for your command. »

She feels the hair rising behind her neck, her finger rubbing the button of the communicator as she ponders what to ask next. 

 _Find your strength, Kira,_ she tells herself, her eyes briefly shutting. _You are in in charge of hundreds of lives until Ben comes back. This is not just about what you want._

She finally presses the button, looking more determined.

« Commander, what is the status of our fleet? » she says with confidence.

« Despite some heavy damages sustained mostly by the Annihilator, we haven’t lost any ship. However, we managed to compromise the stability of the Dominator which is probably what made the traitor retreat from the battlefield. » Mitaka tries to tone down the pride in his voice, but the prospect of having beaten Hux is obviously thrilling for him.

« Is the tower still operational? » adds Kira, trying to ignore the tightening in her chest.

« Several explosions weakened its structure and ground reports tend to make us think that it is on the verge of collapsing.» replies Mitaka before clearing his throat and adding : « The last of the enemy ground forces have been arrested there. It was obviously an important position for General Hux. »

She needs to ask… she has to know what happened to Poe.

« Commander, do you have any news about the black X-Wings which arrived on site right after me? »

« It was joined by a rebel squadron at some point and was the one leading the attack on the tower. A few of their ships have been lost during the battle.  They made their hyperspace jump 2 standard hours ago but I can’t tell you if the black one was among them.»

2 standard hours. The ride from Zelno to Falleen through the fastest hyperspace corridor is 3 hours long and there are no possibilities of communicating while travelling at this speed. Not without the proper relays. Maybe that Poe is already on his way back to her.

If he isn’t lost…

« Commander Mitaka, make sure to give the final blow to the tower, then bring our forces home on Merisee. » She says, trying to keep her voice steady.

***

_Ben… Ben… where are you?_

There is no sound, no light. She doesn’t feel cold nor does she feel hot and she can’t see a thing.

The first idea coming back in her mind is how she projected herself to Ben and how she could physically feel him, despite the distance.

_Ben… Ben please…_

There is an ache forming somewhere. Is it in her mind, or within her body? But if it’s that, then how can she feel that ache when she can’t feel her own physical form?

_Ben…_

_Rey._

His voice, at last.

_Ben, what happened to us? What’s going on? I can’t see anything. I don’t feel anything._

A pose, then his voice echoes again, probably in her mind.

_I don’t know sweetheart._

_Are we dead?_ She hesitates, clearly afraid of the answer.

 _No._ The answer is quick and sharp, then his tone softens a little. _This is something else. We used a lot of our life-force._

_I projected myself to you. You told me once that the effort would kill me._

_You are not going to die, sweetheart. I don’t know what it is, but we are going to be fine. Do you trust me?_

_With my own life. Stay with me, please._

_I’ll always be with you._

* * *

 


	47. Scar tissue that I wish you saw

* * *

 

**Part 47 : scar tissue that I wish you saw**

**Falleen – 16 hours after the end of the battle of Zelno**

 

Kira

 16 hours, still no signs of him, and she is borderline going mad. The dark part of her gathers its strength. If he doesn’t come back, then the galaxy will bleed because nothing is worth saving if he is not there to see it.

Finn

16 hours, damn it! He has to jump into the next ship and hunt for him because that’s his friend up there! Rose, who finally joined him on Falleen, agrees and is already plotting.

And why has green squadron left him behind when general Organa had specifically asked them to escort him back to the base? How could they be so leniant?  unless… unless there is another reason he ignores…

Leia

That hot head… that crazy pilot! What has come into his mind again? Why does he keep doing unsettling things like this? Why can’t he understand that she can’t lose anyone anymore and especially not him who for years have become a twisted kind of surrogate son?

She looks at Ben and shakes her head. Does she have to lose them all? Is that her curse for turning her back to the force?

 

***

It starts with a dot over the horizon, long after the sun is gone. She could have mixed it with debris entering the atmosphere but its course is too erratic to be the one of an inanimate object. It could also have been her eyes. She has kept them for hours over the sky, despite Jelan coming and going to check on her and despite her sense of duty asking her to go and stay with Ben.

She knows that she can’t do that because his mother took residence in that room with him and the Jedi girl, and she isn’t sure she could stomach being close to Leia Organa Solo with no one holding her back. Her mind is too much in disarray, and she knows too many of the mistakes made by that woman that pushed Ben to fall under Snoke’s grasp.

Her and her twin brother, the almighty Jedi master that everyone praised… the hypocrite refusing to acknowledge his own darkness and who…

The dot gets bigger at some point then she can spots like a cross shape and she knows it’s an X-Wings. But in the night sky, it’s impossible to see its color. It would be too far away, anyway. If it’s an X-Wings, they should be receiving a message soon. A request for landing.

She looks at the communicator she is gripping in her hand. It’s a wonder she didn’t crush the device after so many hours holding it as if it was a lifeline. If it’s him, he’ll call. He’ll let her know he is ok.

Looking back at the sky, she sees the cross getting bigger. It is heading toward them, clearly. It’s just not flying like a regular X-Wings should especially not a gifted one like him. What if it’s not him, after all? What if it’s a random resistance ship coming here to warn Organa about the demise of her best pilot?

No, she has to believe in the Force. She would know it if he was gone. He can’t be gone because if he is, then the universe will have to pay for it.

That damned X-Wings is not coming down fast enough! Why is it lagging so much? If it has news about Dameron, then it better hurry and give them straight away! Maybe that he needs assistance somewhere! Perhaps on Zelno too! Why did she sent Mitaka and the fleet back to Merisee? Everyone should be searching for him right now!

There is still no communication from the unknown ship! And she should already warn their security forces in case a threat is coming! But her eyes remain glued over that ship, over that sky and over the last of the hopes she has left.

If Hux caused his death, if he so much as captured him there will be blood… massive blood. She nearly lost him once on Bespin, this is not going to happen again. It’s not possible. It’s not poss…

It’s black… the ship is black!

Her mind goes blank.

Her heart is madly racing.

There is no message but she doesn’t need any.

Only he can fly that beast.

She turns and runs to the hangar to wait for him.

***

Rey is still. Her eyes closed and her face a bit paler than normal, she looks asleep but Leia knows she isn’t. Neither Is Ben who is in the exact same condition, except for a few minor wounds they had no problem treating as soon as he was transferred here.

She is determined to stay in that room until he wakes up. Deep down, she knows he won’t be pleased and if she is honest with herself, she has mixed feelings about him. Can she still consider him as her boy after nearly 7 years of the horror he took part of? She used to blame it all on Snoke, but… but he killed Han.

Can she forgive him for that? Putting gently a hand over her face, she shuts her eyes and realizes once again that mothers shouldn’t give up on their children. Breha didn’t raise her to be suspicious like this. She was supposed to be soft and forgiving…

But the war happened. The resistance happened, and reconstruction happened.

What has been his place in all of this?

Leia lowers her hand, her eyes landing on Rey.

And what has been hers? An orphan from Jakku, thrown in the battle almost by accident, discovering along the way that she is a Jedi… oh Force, she is like Luke. Will she waste away like him in the end?

Leia suddenly frown and stands, moving closer to the bed.

« Rey? » she calls, focusing on the young Jedi’s fluttering eyelids. « Rey can you hear me? »

The young woman tries to open her mouth but seems to fail. Her fingers stretch as if they were searching for something and Leia grabs one of her hands eagerly. « It’s all right. Take your time. »

« Ben… » the young Jedi whispers after gathering all the strength she has left in her.

« He is right next to you. Don’t you worry for him. He is safe. » explains Leia, keeping her voice as gentle as possible.

Rey keeps moving her fingers frantically and finally, Leia gets it. Taking slowly one of Ben’s hands, she puts it over Rey’s hand and holds it in place, making sure to keep a steady contact between the two.

« Not… alone… » whispers Rey, her face looking more relaxed from the moment she can feel Ben’s skin.

« What did you say? » asks Leia, holding their hands together.

Rey doesn’t answer, but her head slightly turns toward Ben and in a matter of seconds, she is back to sleep.

***

Finn runs in the hangar bay just as the black X-Wings settles in its usual corner. He can see with a simple look that some parts of the ship have sustained some heavy damages, which makes him sprint faster toward it.

« Poe! » He screams, looking up as the cockpit bursts open.

Kira comes in from the outside then freezes when she spots the cockpit being open. She can see right behind it, BB-8’s dome right before it vanishes, then in a matter of seconds, the astrodroid lands on the floor, throwing a bunch of offended beeps in the process.

Moving from the cockpit in slow motion, Poe stood up then proceeds to climb down. As soon as his feet reach the floor, he is pulled in a tight hug by a frantic Finn, who is almost incoherently babbling about the time it took him to come back, and why didn’t he leave with the green squadron, and what the fuck was he thinking, everyone in the resistance was almost mad with worry !

Patting his back, Poe chuckles a little. « It’s all right man. I’m fine. Just worn out. »

Kira watches from where she is, half of her being relieved of seeing the pilot standing, and the other wanting to strangle Finn for being here… because that should be her talking to him and making sure he is ok. That should be her touching him and …

That should be Kira. But can he still see Kira when he looks at her? Or does he just see Tarath?

As if he could access her though, Poe turns his head, spots her, and it’s like she is suddenly helpless under his gaze.

Poe slightly releases Finn and pats his shoulders while keeping his eyes on Kira. « I’ll be with you in a bit. » He says his voice a bit raw from lack of resting.

Finn briefly turns his head and spots her, his gaze slightly hardening. Reluctantly, he pulls away and nods. « I’ll warn Leia and Rosie. » He mumbles before turning and leaving the hangar.

Kira feels grounded on her spot, held by his gaze and perhaps by something she hasn’t experienced since the last day of the Jedi temple: a consuming fear.

Stepping closer slowly, he runs a hand through his plastered locks and even from a distance, she can see the dark circles around his eyes. His pilot suit, she is certain, has also seen better days.

Stopping a few feet from her, he nods then moves his head slightly forward and says. « The tower is destroyed. »

« I know. » she answers a bit too fast.

«‘Course you do. » he says, a dark glint in his eyes. « Your people were still up there when it happened. »

« They lost track of you. » she replies, causing him to slightly smirk.

« That’s kind of my thing. Being unpredictable. » He seems smug about it, and somehow, that infuriates her.

« 16 hours, Dameron. The battle ended 16 hours ago. » is her voice shaking? _Crap_ , she thinks, _it is shaking!_ it has to be, because his attitude slightly softens.

« There were a few of Hux’ Tie-fighters left. They went after me and before I could get on orbit, they landed a few hit on my ship. I managed to make a jump but something got damaged in my hyperdrive and it disconnected 40 minutes into the trip. BB-8 managed to fix it but it took… well… a while, as you see. » Searching her face, Poe can see that something is boiling in her.

Kira’s fist open and for the first time in the last 16 hours, she drops her communicator. There is a strange weight over her chest, something that is nearly suffocating her, and she suddenly takes some harsh breaths, her head feeling dizzy.

It’s too much. Way too much for her. She may be the leader of the knight of Ren, she may have done some evil deeds in her short life, a part of her remains a 19 years old woman and right now, this is this side of her that is in control.

 Poe reaches out and rubs a thumb under her right eye and over her cheek. « Are you crying over me, Sandeco? » he says, his tone softening even more.

That’s all it takes. She throws herself in his arms and buries her face in his dirty pilot suit. When she feels his arms wrap around her and his head rest against hers, she fully drops the knight act, allows herself to be simply Kira and sobs in his arms.

* * *

 

 


	48. Decisions

* * *

**Part 48: Decisions**

Leia Organa Solo might be a tiny woman, it is never wise to cross her. That’s something Poe remembers each time he spots her as she is now, heading straight toward him, her lips pressed in a firm line and a high level of annoyance in her eyes.

He towers her, and yet, as she stops in front of him, he feels small. Very small. And he knows that once again, this is going to leave a mark. He is glad he has been left alone in Kira’s office for what is sure to follow. Not that he would be embarrassed. When you are in the rebellion, you are more than likely to do something questionable at some point, which can easily earn you some public blame.

She takes a deep breath then grits her teeth, her hands balling in fists. « Do you have a valuable reason to justify your insubordination, Commander? » she tries, her voice under some strict control. 

« I followed a hunch. » As soon as the words leave his mouth, he knows this isn’t what he should have said.

« We can’t afford this kind of behavior! You went behind enemy lines, on your own and you landed yourself in the middle of a battle between the two sides of the First Order! I don’t know if you qualify as stupid or crazy! » she nearly screams, her temper getting the best of her.

_Ah, now that’s uncommon_ , he thinks before trying to read what she is trying to hide by schooling her facial features.

« Leia… » he stars, his voice calmer than usual.

« I am sick of rogue people getting themselves killed on behalf of a hunch! This rebellion doesn’t need heroes anymore! Our heroes are all dead! We need people able to fight and to survive at the same time! »

« Leia… » he insists, and a part of him is really moved by all she doesn’t say but is hinting regarding his personal safety.

« You are one of the leaders! One of the very few I trust to take the lead when I’ll reach the other shore! You won’t be of any use if you become, in fact, a ghost! »

« Leia! » He shouts, putting his hands on her frail shoulders, which instantly makes her stop and a part of him breaks as he sees the tears in her eyes. « There was a tower. One designed to affect the force abilities in force users on a massive range. I don’t know the specifics but I know it was bad enough. Rey has been affected by a device like this back on Bespin and she couldn’t use her abilities anymore which put us all in danger, ultimately. I figured it would be safer to destroy this new device before it could impair us on the long run. Rey won’t be the last Jedi. All is as the force wills it. There are many force sensitives through the universe. They need a chance to explore their potential. »    

« How did you find out? Why didn’t you say anything? » asks the general, a bit defeated.

« It’s… complicated. » he says and he knows at this very moment that the time for hiding is over and that no matter his doubts regarding a certain smuggler, he is going to have to be completely honest with his general.

***

Kira doesn’t even feel like an intruder. She knows she should, but right now, she is throwing her ethic down the drain. She simply remains outside, next to her office’s door and she listens to the muffled sounds coming from there, not because she wants intel, but because she feels starved from his voice.

 She knows he is tired and has many questions. Some of the answers she will give won’t agree with him, but she won’t lie to him. She can lie to anyone not being her brothers and sister… but not to him, the consequences being damned.

She tries to tame her mind but her treacherous thoughts keep bringing her back to the idea that she nearly lost him because he followed her, and he followed her because she hid from him. So he’ll know. He’ll learn everything about her, how she murdered and killed padawans in the temple to save her life, how she endured Snoke’s training, how she pledged her life to Ben and promised herself to always protect the strange family her and the knights are forming no matter the cost.

She is as far away from his Rebel alliance ideal as she can be. He fights for others. She always fought to protect herself. He cares for the galaxy, and her, for her family. He is a hero, and she is a murderer.

And yet, she loves him. Unconditionally, and all she can do for the first time in a very long time, is to pray to the Force that it will be enough to make him stay.

***

_Ben…_

_Rey…_

_Why can’t we see each other? Why is everything so dark? Ben, I’m scared without you._

_I am right here with you, sweetheart. You’re not alone. I’ll always be with you._

Bastila and Revan’s ghostly forms appear in the room, immediately taking in the apparently sleeping Ben and Rey. At some point, someone moved their beds together, when it was understood that Rey’s condition was only improving with a physical contact with Ben. This is why, as the two Force ghosts observe their younger counterparts, they are not surprised to see their hands joined.

« Do you feel that? » says Bastila, her hand elegantly waving toward the two sleeping form.

« His life force is dimming, as hers is getting stronger. He is protecting her. » replies Revan, his head bowing.

« As you once did with me. » Bastila looks at her eternal companion through her eyelashes, peace written on her face.

« As I always will. »

The two force ghosts look at each other and raise their hand, their fantomatic fingers slowly entangling.

« Their journey together in this world isn’t done yet, Revan. I feel it. »

The male force ghost looks back at the two forms laying still on the bed, looking deep in thoughts. « You know the rules, Bastila. We cannot make decisions for them. We can only guide them toward their own truth. »

Bastila turns in pretty much the same gesture as her male counterpart. « Giving them a chance is not making decisions for them, my love. They have yet to explore the depth of their bond, and the beauty of what they share. Our time was too short before it had to end. If we let the events follow this path without interfering, their time will have been shorter than ours. I would have traded the world for one more day by your side. »

« I couldn’t trade the fate of the Universe for one more day by your side even if it was what I desperately wanted. » replies Revan, his eyes remaining on Rey’s form.

« I never blamed you for your choices. However, we now have one to make, and depending on what we decide, everything could change. If he vanishes, she will fall. I feel it as you feel it. She isn’t the balance. They are. Together.»

«If he wakes up, there is still a risk for her to succumb to the dark side. This is what he mostly is. » he objects, his voice remaining calm.

« As you once were. As I once was… the truth lays in between, where we both met. »

The female ghost joins Ben’s side and looks down at him. « He is not different from us. Manipulated, subdued, wounded… yet, able to be saved. By her. If we don’t give them a chance to achieve this, she will wake up to think she has failed which in return will let darkness triumph. »

Revan joins Rey’s side and observes her face, then the way she grips Ben’s hand in her sleep.

« Desperation is a very bad guide, my love. » adds the woman and finally, the man bows his head.

In the same motion, Bastila places a hand over Ben’s forehead as Revan does the same to Rey. Shutting their eyes, their voice rise barely above a whisper, and they prey to the force with the hope to restore the balance in the energy flow circulating between the two sleeping lovers.

_Ben… Ben…_

_Rey…_

_You feel so far away. What happened to us? Why can’t I see you? Why can’t I see anything?_

_Trust the Force. Trust the force and I’ll always be with you._

***

**Falleen, the next day**

At some point during the night, Kira had joined the room where the other knights had been settled. It is only then that she had allowed herself to relax enough to rest.

Jelan had covered her with his own blanket once he had been sure she was asleep, then he had taken over guard duty from this moment. His energy level being back to normal, he had managed to watch over them all for the whole night, changing the bacta patch over Daine’s wound and monitoring Nervan’s reactions since Adara was still out.

Now that the light is filtering through the shutters, he stands and brieftly checks on the still sleeping Kira. He then focuses over Daine who placed himself a few hours ago in a deep meditative trance to help with the healing process. Once he is certain Daine’s body is reacting well, he turns and meets Nervan’s eyes for the first time since the battlefield.

The dangerous mix of rage and desperation displayed there only matches the strength the tall man is using to hold his lover against him. He hasn’t let go. He won’t let go. Everyone in their group knows that. They aren’t two beings but one split in two bodies, with Nervan being the raw strength and Adara the rationality controlling it.

And with the rationality currently impaired and the strength fuelled by an abysmal amount of pain, Jelan knows hell is at their door. Standing, he joins the two lovers in their corner and kneels next to them, never breaking eye contact with Nervan.

« If she has internal damages she should be seen by a medic. You can’t sustain her indefinitely with your force healing abilities. They are not good enough to reverse extended wounds. »

« No stranger will be allowed to lay a finger on her. » spits Nervan, his voice raw and barely recognizable.

« We are far away from Merisee. We won’t have access to our medical team in time. » replies Jelan, his tone commanding.

« I said no one will touch her. » The emptiness in Nervan’s voice is chilling, but the other knight doesn’t flinch.

« Then you will lose her. We will all lose her. »

The tightening of Nervan’s arms around Adara is immediate.

« The odds are against us, Nervan. Ben is still not coming back and Hux is out there. Hux did this to her. He ordered our mothership to be taken down. If Adara is wounded, it’s because of him. Don’t you want revenge? Don’t you want to make him suffer for what he did to her?» taunts Jelan before adding : « We let the resistance medic check on Ben. We have a truce with them. Let them at least stabilize her. We are going to need her to take our revenge. »

Nervan visibly clenches his teeth, his grip around Adara tightening even more, and Jelan understands that he is not going to get through his brother, despite his attempts. 

« She doesn’t want to die. » Kira’s voice is surprisingly soft from the other side of the room. Sitting up, she rubs her tired eyes then drops her hands, her eyes landing on Adara. « She wants to stay with you. When you love someone, you don’t want to be separated from them, no matter the cost. »

Jelan turns, his eyebrow lifting at Kira’s sudden interest for Love.

« You need to make a sacrifice and allow someone that isn’t you to help her. » standing, Kira adjusts the blanket around her shoulders and joins the three of them in their corner. « Sometimes, this is what it takes. Accepting the unknown. » Kneeling, she extends a hand toward Adara and rests it over her shoulder. She knows she is the only one Nervan won’t attack for doing this, because she is still technically their leader.

« I always thought your ways were strange. I had never felt this kind of attachment before, because what we always shared is different from what you two always had. But now, I get it. » Turning her green eyes toward Nervan’s dark look, she barely nods. « Now I know. I understand the depth and how nothing else matters, because I feel it too. »

There is a flash of intense sadness in her eyes that reflect the agony in Nervan’s, and for a brief moment, there is an understanding passing between them. Bowing her head, she stands without breaking eyes contact. Lifting Adara’s limp form in his arms, Nervan stands then follows their leader as she brings him to the med bay to see the medic brought in by the resistance.

***

**Secured transmission: encryption protocol 24-CBG-485675**

**Rebel Alliance headquarters to General Leia Organa Solo**

 

Topic: First Order’s broadcast on all the planets from the Core.

[Decoding and reencoding videofeed]

…

…

…

« This is Supreme Leader Armitage Hux from the First Order. Yesterday at 10:00 standard time, the traitor Kylo Ren and his terrorist army have been neutralized after an attempt on one of our classified outposts in the Outer Rim. The First Order’s army succeeded in repelling the attack. Searches are actually being conducted to retrieve the body of the traitor and his allies. A public display will be made with the bodies in the courtyard of the imperial palace in Coruscant as a warning for all the potential traitors through the galaxy.

The traitor Kylo Ren found allies among the underground communities of smugglers and terrorists like him. The First Order will hunt down and destroy anyone trying to disrupt the peaceful reign of unity I am currently establishing as your Supreme Leader. To those harboring ill feelings toward our laws, surrender now, or suffer the consequences. To the so called Resistance, responsible for many massive planetary destructions, know that your reign of sedition is over. We will find you and we will stop you before you can further pursue your quest for chaos. »

***

Leia looks alternatively between Poe, Rose and Finn, her arms folded.

It’s Poe that breaks the silence first, slightly pointing at the holopad displaying Hux’ face. « Is he implying that we are the cause of all that’s wrong in the universe? »

« That’s the biggest load of crap I’ve ever heard. » snaps Finn, his eyes dark and infuriated.

« This is politics, Finn. We all know this is a lie, yet, among those who have listened to this message, some will believe him. The next step is the rumors being spread like wild fire among the underground communities to try and destroy our credibility. Hux knows our assets are operational thanks to the smuggling rings. » simply states Leia, her arms folded.

« What are we going to do? » asks Rose, her hands in fists. « We can’t let the lies spread! The way he said it, it looks like he is hinting that Hosnian Prime is our fault! »

« You caught that too, hmmm? » Leia joins Rose and looks at her, rubbing her arm a little. « The lies will spread regardless. All we can do is to go on with the fight, with as much dedication as before. This announcement shows something. Hux feels the need to display information, even fake ones. We all know where Ben and his knights are. » Her eyes turn toward Poe who is jutting his chin a little.

« He is justifying himself. » says the pilot, a slow smirk forming on his lips.

« Justifying himself for what? And toward who ? » asks Finn, still looking furious.

« Hux probably lost more in the fight around Zelno than what he wants to admit. He is justifying himself in front of his forces as much as he is trying to turn people against us and for this, he uses propaganda. That means one thing. » calmly adds Leia.

« He is in a difficult position. He isn’t certain his authority will be enough to have people follow him blindly. » Poe’s eyes take a darker shade. « This is our chance. »

« And the fact that he is already burying Ben and his knights means that he is psychologically removing the alternative of defecting to join the regular First Order to any of his men willing to leave his side. »

« Wait. » cuts Finn, looking at Poe and Rose, then focusing on Leia. « What happens if everyone learns that your son and his knights are alive? »

« Not much. Unless they make a display of power showing that Hux is manipulating the truth. » replies the general. « But they aren’t in condition to do so. »

« Kira is. » Poe’s voice remains calm, even when he notices Finn flinching at the name. « She could do it. We could come up with something. I’m sure she probably has a few things up her sleeve. What I saw back on Zelno was… well it was huge. »

« We should perhaps talk to her about it, then. » says Leia, trying to ignore Finn’s reaction.

« I’ll talk to her alone first, if you don’t mind. » replies Poe, his tone serious.

Leia considers the idea for a while then bows her head. « Very well, Commander. »

***

It takes half a standard hour to Poe to find Kira right outside the medbay. The young woman is leaning against the wall, her arms folded and a strange blanket around her shoulders.

This is a look Poe wouldn’t have expected coming from her. Kira is tired. Tired and sad.

She spots him when he is a few feet away from her, realizing at the same time that she was too lost in thoughts to register the moves around her.

_Not clever in times of war._ She thinks, internally berating herself for her lack of focus.

« Who’s in there? » he asks, nodding casually toward the door.

« I managed to drag Nervan there so that your doc could check on Adara. She’s still unconscious. » Her head rests against the wall, her green eyes focusing over his face. She tries to ignore her racing heart, the close proximity of Poe creating a revolution within her own body.

« Is she going to be ok? » Poe’s brown eyes lock with hers, knocking the air out of her lungs a little more.

« I hope so. Nervan is becoming unstable and he is one of the strongest among us. Without her to balance him… » her voice drops and she looks away at nothing in particular, feeling the need to go on, a mild confession to give him something… anything for him to trust her.

« They are force bonded. Not as much as Ben and your… and Rey. But there is that thing between them where they truly depend on each other to survive. It has always been like this from the moment they met in the temple. »

« The temple. » says Poe, his voice neutral.

« The six of us. We all are survivors from the temple. From… when they tried to destroy us. » she pauses, wondering for a bit if she should go on on that path. « Because we were different. »

« Different? » asks the pilot as he settles next to her against the wall.

« Darksiders, as they liked to label it. »

« And how would you have labeled it? »

Kira remains silent for a few seconds then unfolds her arms and rubs her palms over her thighs. « Do you know the Jedi code? »

« No. I’ve never heard anything about it, past the fact that Jedi are peaceful by essence and have abilities beyond what common people have. » Poe turns his head and looks down at her.

« There is no room for passion. Or doubts, or love. Any display of emotion goes against the Jedi teaching. They used to believe in unconditional love and serenity. They claimed they wanted harmony and peace. But how do you know peace if you don’t know what chaos looks like? How do you define harmony if you don’t know what conflict is? And how do you know what it is to love if you are not allowed to give into your emotions? We were different because we all had… those overwhelming feelings that we couldn’t tame. Ben… for so many reasons, Nervan and Adara because of what they share, Jelan because of his doubts, Daine because of his needs… And me… because I could read everyone’s mind… every last one of them and I knew that under their so perfect Jedi facade, they were judging and despising us. »

« Kira, I’m not sure you should tell me all this. » replies Poe, as he focuses on a spot on the wall in front of him.

« Why? Are you afraid of seeing that Darksiders are not what you expect? » She says, trying to keep her voice steady.

« I’m not ready for it. It’s too soon. » he states, not looking at her.  « I can’t… see you like that. It doesn’t add up. »

« Yet, this is what I am. » She replies, her tone as gentle as possible.

« Not to me. To me, you are just Kira. What you can do… what you have done…»

« Scares you. » raising a hand, she slowly rubs her eyes, the beginning of a headache forming.

« It doesn’t. You don’t scare me, Kira. I mean, your powers don’t scare me. What scares me is something else. »

Kira slowly drops her hand, her eyes focusing back on Poe’s face just in time to meet his eyes.

« What scares me is that I am still dragged to you despite all I know. » raising a hand, he grabs her chin and brushes a thumb against her cheek. « I’m a Rebel pilot and you are a knight of Ren. We fought each other. With all we had. »

« We did. But in the end, we joined forces. » she whispers, drowning in his eyes.

« Under false pretenses, admit it. » he adds, his thumb slowly brushing her skin.

« I’m a good liar… but there are things I can’t fake. » she slightly turns her head against his hand, her eyes shutting. « People like me don’t form attachments for no reason. When we do… it has a true meaning. And it doesn’t go away even if it contradicts our basic needs for self preservation.»

« Speaking of self preservation… » he says, slowly releasing her cheek. « I think you are going to have to take action soon. Probably on your leader’s behalf. »

Her eyes immediately snap open, and Poe can’t help but notice that any trace of softness is momentarily gone.

« Our main headquarters sent us a broadcast made by Hux a few hours ago.  I think you should see it. »

« Now. » is the only thing she answers in a chilling tone.

* * *

 

 

 


	49. aftershock

* * *

**Part 49 : aftershock**

**Falleen**

**Kira’s office**

Kira turns off the holopad after having played Hux’ broadcast for the fourth time. She isn’t sure she can stomach watching that man once more without taking the risk of losing control.

Sitting on the edge of her desk, she looks out throught the duraglass, her eyes seemingly landing over the fallen star-destroyer standing like a ghost in the distance.

« Is there any move you can make to react to this videofeed ? » asks Leia, her hands joined in front of her. « it seems to me that if we could find a way to limit Hux’ credibility… »

« I know how politics work, General. » cuts Kira in a tone hiding nothing of the anger she is currently experiencing. « I could make a broadcast on my own, explaining that Hux is a liar and that we are fine. The problem is that no one would believe it. »

« Why not? » Kira immediately turns her head and meets Poe’s eyes.

« Because the Knights of Ren never use their voice, unless we are replacing our leader in the line of command. If we want people to believe us, Ben has to record the message and as you know, he is currently unable to do so. »

Kira lowers her head just a fraction, not wanting to show any type of weakness at this particular moment and especially not in front of the resistance leader.

« Doctor Kalonia is confused by his and Rey’s condition. She scanned them for internal damages but, except for minor wounds on his part, nothing explains what is currently happening to them. » says Leia as she slowly sits in one of the chairs.

« That’s because your doctor doesn’t know how the force operates. »replies Kira, getting all of Poe’s attention as he is standing behind his general. « I connected with both their mind in their sleep. With Rey’s before I left for Zelno, and with Ben’s when we found him and my knights hidden in the cave. They combined their powers across the galaxy to try and take down this tower. But before they could actually do it, they spotted the remains of the Subjugator entering atmosphere. Somehow, Ben felt Nervan, Adara and Daine were still inside and he decided to focus and redirect his and Rey’s energy to save them. »

Slowly rubbing her eyes, Kira bluntly adds: « It was too big for them. They nearly killed themselves by channeling so much power in such a short time. »

« Does that mean they can’t be helped? » Asks Poe when he realizes Leia is no longer talking.

« No, that’s not what I said. They are still here, since I could connect with them. But they are buried deep within their own mind and if we want to speed up the process of their recovery, then we are going to need a huge amount of force abilities. »  dropping her hand, she focuses her green eyes back on her… her what ? They aren’t lovers, he is perhaps her boyfriend, or at the very least, the man filling her mind almost constantly…

« An amount we don’t possess right now. » she goes on a bit more softly. « For now, I can’t ask Daine, Nervan or Adara to help us. that leaves just Jelan and I and I doubt the two of us could… »

« There is me. » cuts Leia a bit abruptly.

Leia Organa Solo… the one who lied for so long in a way that hurt her brother. Twin sister of the butcher who tried to murder him in his sleep…

« I realize I am untrained, but I can access the Force. I already have. And… » She turns her head and looks up at Poe, as if to justify herself. « He is my son. I can’t leave him unconscious if I can do something about it. »

***

**Razor space base. Ilum’s orbit.**

**Unknown regions.**

 

 « Did they recover the bodies? » Hux’ low tone is a warning in itself and the messenger currently standing in front of him knows that he is walking on the edge of something potentially nasty.

« My lord the two units sent to retrieve the bodies have been taken by the enemy. » the man swallows a bit hard, his eyes focusing on a spot under Hux’ nose instead of on his eyes.

Hux shifts on his throne like seat and casually crosses his legs. « You want me to believe that my stormtroopers were no match in front of disorganized rogue units sent out of desperation by what is left of that pathetic rebellion? »

« They were outnumbered. The resistance joined the battlefield and… » The messenger’s voice drops as he spots Hux closing one of his hands in fist.

« Very well. » spits the ginger haired man. « I want the stormtrooper’s conditioning protocol redone and enhanced. I want to speak with the officers in charge of this by 6:00 tonight and I expect them to present a set of valuable suggestions in order to avoid further occurrences of the mess I keep noticing among our ranks. Do I make myself clear ? »

« Yes, my lord. » replies the messenger, his eyes remaining lowered.

« That will be all. » adds Hux in a cutting tone.

The fact that the messenger seems to retreat in a hurry pleases Hux who loves order and authority.

The bodies, though… the bodies make him concerned.

What if some of them had survived? What if Ren is still alive? Oh well, if he is, that won’t be for long. The tower is down, but there are many other weapons he’ll be able to use soon enough courtesy of Snoke’s careful planning. Starkiller 2 will be operational soon.

Yes, soon enough, order and authority will be back through the whole galaxy and there will be no more resistance or rogue officers.

There will be only two choices in his new universe: surrendering, or dying.

 

***

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room**

« The first time I saw her, her first impulse was to hit me with her staff. »

Rose slightly smiles as she observes her boyfriend from her spot near the window. Finn is protectively standing next to Rey’s bed, his eyes on their sleeping friend’s face and for once, he looks calm.

« BB-8 had seen Poe’s jacket on me, and I think she assumed I had stolen it. She’s the strongest woman I’ve ever known, Rosie. Not even Phasma could have competed. »

Now, that’s an acknowledgement. The young engineer remembers vividly what Phasma was like. She had, after all, witnessed most of that fight between Finn and his former leader, and Force knows it had terrified her then.

« I’m sure she’ll be back soon. » replies Rose as quietly as possible.

Finn’s eyes drop over Rey and Ben’s joined hands and once again, the former stormtrooper feels a wave of cold anger run through him. It will take a lot of time for him to be able to start accepting the situation, he is well aware of that.

His eyes travels back to Rey’s face and Finn suddenly frowns. Is she crying?

***

_I know you are still here. I can feel you near. Ben please, talk to me._

_…_

_Ben… Ben!_

It’s such a strange sensation… Rey has access to all her feelings, but not to the physical actions coming with them. She feels her own fear, but doesn’t experience the tightening of her chest that should come with it.

She hears the desperation when she screams his name, but she can’t feel the tears flowing over her cheeks.

_Ben please, give me a sign… any sign! Don’t leave me here!_

***

The door suddenly opens and Jelan comes in, holding the door open for leia, who is followed by Kira, then Poe.

Coming closer, Leia stands at the bottom of the bed, watching at the two sleeping forms.

« Any change? »  asks the general in a soft and concerned tone.

Almost on autopilot, Finn reaches up and rubs a thumb over Rey’s cheek. « She’s crying. Rey! Rey can you hear me? »

he grabs her free hand and holds it as hard as he can, trying his best to give her something to anchor herself to. He is here, he is her friend, and he won’t let go until she is back! Rose joins his side in one instant and spots the flow of tears bathing Rey’s face.

« She’s coming back! » she says enthusiastically in a way only her is able to pull in time of crisis.

« Let me check her. » interrupts Kira, who for now remains in a corner. Leia meets her eyes and bows her head before asking quietly. « Finn, Rose, please, let Miss Sandeco check Rey. »

Kira comes closer as the two resistance members reluctantly move back. She doesn’t have to check. She knows Poe is watching her intensely. Putting her fingers against Rey’s temple, she briefly meets Jelan’s eyes, who in returns nod at her.

Shutting her eyes, Kira allows herself to dive into Rey’s mind and instead of the void she had found there right before leaving for the battle of Zelno, she sees there a tangled mix of images in no particular order, as if Rey was accessing randomly her memories.

Stumbling a little, Kira puts a hand over the bed to steady herself and dives deeper in Rey’s mind. She is unaware of the step Poe takes when he spots her losing her balance, or of the fact that Jelan stops him by putting a hand on his chest and shaking his head.

***

_Ben! You can’t leave me now! You promised! You promised I’d never be alone anymore! Show yourself!_

The darkness has long vanished, only to be replaced by a tangled mess of images. One second she sees her AT-AT on Jakku, then she is on Takodana, in the castle, then in the forest, or on another planet, in front of a huge tower. It switches again and she is in that weird temple where they once met Bastila and Revan, only to be once again under Jakku’s sun. Everything moves fast, in no particular order but she doesn’t care. She doesn’t care! Her stability doesn’t lay in a particular scenery! She needs him! She needs him more than the air she has to breathe.

_BEN!_

She screams in her mind, in a way that would be deafening in the real world, then, feeling a presence behind her, she turns and spots Kira.

***

Kira immediately releases Rey’s mind and opens her eyes, taking a hard breath.

« What have you seen? » asks leia perhaps a bit too eagerly to keep up the charade of the calm and collected general.

Raising a hand, kira pinches the bridge of her nose and in an instant, Jelan is by her side and watching her. « I don’t know what happened to her, but everything in her mind looks like it has been brought to the surface at once. Like someone dragged her up. She’s almost back.»

« Can we help her doing so? » cuts Finn, his eyes alternately going from Kira to Leia.

« I can connect to her so… yes, I can help her. If Jelan and the general help me with their own abilities. » moving her eyes over Ben, the green eyed woman tenses.

« What about him? » asks quietly Jelan when he notices the way she is looking at their leader.

« I need to check his mind. » replies Kira before extending her hand and applying her fingers over his temples. Shutting her eyes, she takes several soft breaths then slowly drops her hand.

« Kira ? » says Jelan in a warning tone.

« We need to work on Rey’s mind first. » replies the young woman, keeping to herself the horrible void she has just felt in Ben’s mind.

***

**Razor space base. Ilum’s orbit. Unknown regions.**

**A few hours later.**

 

That had to be expected. Hux is surrounded by useless officers.

What’s the point in giving high ranks to people unable to review a simple process in a time of crisis ? When he was in their place, Hux had done better than this. Then again, he had always been more focused and more dedicated than most of those in training with him.

A trait he had developed because of the strict education his father gave him. The man had been despicable but his military record had been flawless and walking in his shoes had been easy, as it required first and foremost casting aside unnecessary human interactions. Hux has been programmed to become a leader from a young age. Brendol, his father, molded him for that in the hard way. That made getting rid of him considerably easier when the time came to take control of everything.

Him and Phasma had been a great team for that, him as a strategist, her as the human weapon. Too bad she had to die on the Supremacy. What a waste of talent and dedication…

Hux taps a finger under his chin, the wrinkle between his eyebrows enhancing as he frowns.  A new Phasma… now that would be useful, but for this, he would have to select one of the most talented fighters in the program and shape them into the perfect weapon.

 His eyes land on the three corpses at the bottom of the dais. Too many mistakes have been made over the past few years. Mistakes he will no longer tolerate now that he is fully in charge.

Standing from his throne, he climbs down the dais and steps over the bodies, barely waving at the praetorians guarding in the room’s corners.

« Clean that up. » he spits, before exiting the room.

Finding a new Phasma… yes... that’s what he will do once he is done putting a new set of officers in charge of the stormtrooper’s training facility.

***

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room.**

At some point during the evening, Kira had to ask everyone but Leia and Jelan to clear the room.  Even with that, her focus kept slipping and as she is now standing at the bottom of the bed, she realizes bringing Rey and Ben back won’t be that easy.

For a brief moment, she allows herself to feel defeated and as she lowers her eyes, she feels a hand slowly touching the lower part of her back. She turns her head to look at the owner of that hand, and surprisingly enough, she feels no anger.

She should. Oh yes, she should. On Behalf of Ben and because her more than anyone else saw what that woman’s deception caused. But Leia looks as defeated and tired as her and she can sense that those feelings aren’t caused by any strategic expectation.

« You did what you could. Perhaps we should try another time. » says the older woman, carefully selecting her words.

« I’m not abandoning him in the void. » answers Kira, her voice a bit dark.

« I am certain that wherever he is, he knows you aren’t abandoning him. » adds the former princess. « You must gather your strength again. You came back from a very important battle only yesterday. » Looking at Jelan, Leia bows her head. « As do you. »

« We will be fine, general Organa. » answers the knight, his attitude a bit stiff. « We can try again. »

« I am afraid I’ll need a bit of time before I can start again. » says the older woman, her eyes slightly lowering. « I was never truly trained. I use the force on instinct more than on will. »

The dark knight keeps his eyes on Leia but doesn’t add another word because anything he could say would probably be inadequate given their current situation.

« Let’s take an hour. » decides Kira before turning and leaving the room.

***

**Falleen**

**Kira’s office**

 

She didn’t expect anyone to be in her office.

After exiting the room and spotting Finn and Rose waiting for Leia, she had asked Jelan to go rest and watch over Daine, while she briefly left to check on Nervan and Adara.

Her sister was now stable. A s a result, the situation with Nervan was less dreadful, but just barely.

She had then decided to go find some privacy in her office, hoping that this would help her sort out the chaos currently clouding her mind.

All the artificial lights are off when she comes in, and she relies on the faint glow coming from the duraglass bay to find her way through the darkness. She doesn’t feel like switching everything on. For now, she is a creature of darkness and she needs to feel in her element for a bit.

Standing in front of the desolate scenery displayed behind the window she quickly replays some of the darkest moments of her life. Snoke’s training, the constant danger of being a knight of Ren, the missions to subdue or destroy. The darkness. The chaos.

 The temple… the Jedi trying to kill them. The Jedi trying to kill them all…

She closes her eyes, feeling a stabbing sensation in her chest and at this exact moment, she feels a presence in the room.

It’s him. of course. It has to be him. How she could miss his presence when his mind is being so loud is beyond her. Maybe that it’s a sign. Maybe that he can become an extension of her instead of a foreign piece she meets from time to time.

« I was 13. » the words flow from her mouth without any type of control.

 _It’s perhaps better this way_ , she reasons instead of trying to stop herself.

« Still a child, even if all the things I could feel and see made me to develop faster. »

She hears Poe take a breath, but he doesn’t stop her, and she knows that this is because he doesn’t want to break the moment.

« I never really felt in the right place there from the moment I joined the temple. And that was strange, because I was an orphan with nowhere to go in the first place. This should have been my purpose and my home. But…there was always something off between those living there and me. The padawans all looked so dedicated to follow Master Skywalker’s teaching. For them, his words were gold. » she pauses for a while before carefully adding: « But not to me. »

She feels Poe coming closer on her left side but she keeps her eyes closed, images of the temple coming back in her mind. « I had barely any control on my ability to reach people’s mind and that annoyed a lot of people, because I knew everything. I could see everything. Master Luke tried to help me control this through meditation, but meditation was never for me. It doesn’t work for people like me. »

In her memories, she sees various images from that time, faded faces of people blaming her for invading their mind, whispers of padawans, too scared to come closer because she could read them s easily.

« There were a few others like me. Loners, for their own reason. And there was one that intrigued me more than the others. He should have felt at home more than anyone else since the master was his uncle. He was strong. So strong already. But despite his young age, he already had many cracks in his soul. »

She doesn’t know if Poe tenses or if he is just shifting his position to lean against the duraglass. « So many feelings of loss matching mine, except, he wasn’t an orphan, like me. And there was this dark shadow lurking behind him and triggering him at every corner. At some point, he was barely able to control his own temper and that, for a Jedi, is a major flaw. Master Luke grew more and more scared of him and started resenting him. His own darkness was rising against his nephew. »

Kira suddenly opens her eyes and looks out, Poe in the edge of her vision.

« We weren’t a group. But the night everything happened, I decided that we needed to become one in order to survive. They would have killed us down to the last one. What Master Skywalker started with his nephew unleashed the others and they attacked not only Ben, but those of us that were different. Adara and Nervan, who never harmed or threatened anyone. Jelan, whose crime was to be a loner with an habit of making snarky remarks and not conforming to the teaching. Daine… and so many others we lost along the way. »

« And you. » calmly adds Poe.

« I was just 13 and what I saw in their mind that night destroyed the faith I had in the Jedi. The rest was just a matter of survival. First, finding a way to escape the purge by turning the tables on them… we were just a handful, but much more powerful than them. Then, finding a way to survive… together. »

« Kira… » Poe’s voice is surprisingly gentle.

« I know. You don’t want to know the rest. It’s too soon. Or too complicated to handle for now. » she cuts, her attitude a bit stiff. « But you need to understand what Ben and my knights mean to me. »

« I think it’s pretty obvious… » He starts, his eyes not leaving her face.

« They are my family. » she adds, her voice suddenly very businesslike. « And I will do anything to protect my family. »

« Then we aren’t that different. » offers the pilot, one of his hands slightly reaching for hers. Slowly, he hooks two of their fingers together, and for the first time, she turns her green eyes to meet his brown orbs.

« There are many things I don’t know about you. » he goes on. « I don’t know what you can do. And I am certain you took part in things I will never stand for. But I know that survival often leave us with no other choice. I won’t tell you that I don’t care about what you did or what you are. » he lowers his eyes over their joined fingers and slowly entangles them. « But I am willing to look past that to discover who you truly are in full. Because if there is one thing I know… it’s that Kira Sandeco isn’t an act. It’s you. The real you. And I really… » lifting their joined hands, he looks at her while setting a soft kiss on her knuckles. « … really like you. »

She doesn’t answer to this. She simply takes a step closer and buries herself in his warm embrace.

***

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room.**

The sensation of returning in her own body is brutal for Rey. She is assaulted at the same time by a thirst worse than what she has ever felt on Jakku, a feeling of being chilled to the bones, and too many noises making her ears buzz.

However, none of this matters. There is only one thing in her mind: him.

She takes several ragged breaths and forces her eyes open, only to shut them as fast. The lights are dimmed, but they are still too powerful for her for the time being.

Opening her mouth, she tries to call for him, but she feels too weak to pronounce his name. That’s when she feels her hand resting over something at the same time soft and callused. His hand. Her fingers slightly tighten over his.

« Ben… » she manages to whisper, her throat hurting her in the process.

No answer.

She forces her eyes open just enough to see without being assaulted in full by the light. The effort to turn her head feels almost unbearable, but she knows that she has to do it if she wants to be able see him.

His face looks completely at peace. This is what hits her first. Despite the scar bisecting his face, he looks almost soft, his full lips completely relaxed and his long eyelashes framing his closed eyes.

Rey tightens her hold over his hand, her strength slowly returning to her… or, is it the Force?

« Ben… » whispering his name becomes easier. If she can hold his hand so steadily, that means he isn’t a projection. He is right here, with her and she isn’t going to let him go anymore. That goes without saying for her.

No matter the challenges, no matter the obstacles, this is going to be him and her, regardless of what the others are ready to accept.

She feels a rush of warmth and the thirst, while still being there, isn’t that important anymore. The sounds are becoming less disturbing and she is slowly adjusting to the light. She slowly rolls her body to face him and places her free hand over his chest.

She can feel his beating heart, and the rise and fall of his chest. Peace instantly wraps her in its blanket and the fear she had been experiencing in her sleep vanishes to be replaced by something a lot more powerful: hope.

« I know you can hear me. » she says, her fingers slowly rubbing his chest while her other hand is tightening around his. « I know you’ll always hear me. I need you to come back, now. »

Her eyes remain focused over his face, but nothing changes. He looks at peace in a way he probably haven’t been in years…

_You are wrong. I feel like this whenever you are near._

Rey tenses then turns her head and looks around, only to spot the emptiness in the room. Looking back at his sleeping form, she tries: 

_Ben?  Is that my imagination?_

_No sweetheart… I am here, with you. Always._

_Why can’t I see you?_

_I don’t know. We used a lot of strength together._

_Can you see me? Or feel me?_

_I just hear you._

Dragging her fingers over his chest, she tries to scout closer.

_I’m right next to you and I’m going to find a way to bring you back._

 

 

* * *

 

 


	50. crossroads

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone. I wanted to thank you all for your kind comments and also for your patience. This update is long overdue, but I have been really busy lately, which left me with some very few moments of clarity to go on with this fic. I managed to finally publish my original scifi story on Amazon! It has requested some work and focus, but I finally did it! I am so thrilled!
> 
> Anyway, I will try to update this story more regularly now that I am done with this big project! I will also work on "Mundus Subterraneus" and on my new story "Bring Me To Elysium"! Exciting times are coming!!!
> 
> Love you all and see you for the next update!

 

 

* * *

**Part 50 : crossroads**

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room – A week later.**

 

After two days, she is able to keep her eyes open.

After a week, she is able to function again.

And this is when it becomes hard, because… this is not the case for him.

His eyes remain desperately closed, despite all that Leia, Kira and her friends try.

Finn tries to make her leave the room many times. She does that only to use the refresher because leaving him all together isn’t an option.

She barely remembers what happened to them  when she projected herself on Zelno with his help. Kira had to tell her what she harvested in her mind because she wasn’t making any sense of what little she had left in her memories.

What truly mattered to her when it happened was that he was there with her.

Over the week, she realized that being with him is what truly matters. Not the war. Not the fight. Not the resistance. Not even her friends. She is even starting to question her reactions in the throne room when she refused to follow him.

He is asleep. Desperately asleep, and she is borderline going mad without him.

***

« How has he taken the news? » asks Adara who is still under watch in the med bay despite her vitals being good and her wounds properly healing. She knows that Nervan wouldn’t be able to handle it if she tried to be somewhere else for now.

The tall man is currently resting in a nearby chair, having allowed himself to start healing and resting once he was sure his Adara would live.

« As well as he could, given the circumstances. » Kira’s reply comes out as a quiet statement but Adara can tell there is more to it.

« And… how is he reacting to you, now ? »

« He comes around. » says the young woman in a soft tone.

« But does he really know? Does he understand that… » Adara lets her voice drops because, how can she sums up six years under Snoke’s thumb doing all kind of evil deeds ?

« He is well aware of what I am and what we have done. He isn’t ready to explore this part of me. But he isn’t rejecting it. I… I told him… for the temple. That night. » Kira gives a side look toward Nervan then looks back at Adara. « I think he can’t approve. But he can understand… well for me, he can. I know he has some very conflicted feelings toward Ben. »

« Where is the difference? Ben was set to fall when Skywalker decided to take him down. » Adara slightly moves on her side and Nervan immediately opens his eyes to check on her. Silently, she takes his hand and within seconds, she sees him relax then turn to look at Kira.

« Remember, Ben extracted information from his mind. And he was always a bit sloppy with this technique… Then there is the whole Leia factor. Poe is loyal to her. »

« So ? »  cuts Adara, any trace of her usual soft attitude momentarily gone. « He doesn’t know Ben. He doesn’t know what he faced. »

« I know. It’s going to take time and it’s going to be difficult. » replies Kira, her eyes slightly lowering.

« The Jedi will help us. » Nervan’s low and warm tone fills the room as he looks between the girls. « They are force bonded. They are a bridge between us and the resistance. We saw it on Bespin. This thing they share can change everything. »

« It will change everything… if he ever wakes up. » replies Kira, frustration and worry written on her face.

***

**Rey’s room**

Rey barely notices when Leia comes in the room next. Sitting on the bed with both hands trapping one of Ben’s, she is trying to reach his mind, not to avail. In the beginning, she could connect with him, but he is now silent, as if he was sinking in an unreachable place.

The elder woman comes closer, her eyes immediately focusing over her son’s face. After a few seconds of silence, Leia takes a soft breath then starts. « When he was a boy, he was a very light sleeper. He would wake up at the smallest noise and got used to sleeping only a few hours at a time. He was like his father for this. »

Rey doesn’t miss the trembling of Leia’s voice but she does her best to ignore it. She knows deep in her heart that she is that close to losing any common sense and create havoc around her just because the pain she currently feels is like nothing she ever experienced before.

« I often wondered if he had managed to find some peace after all. I doubted it because I knew he was with Snoke. But there are moments where mothers get weak and hope for their children to be ok, even if they know they are in a bad place. »

She sees out of the corner of her eye that the princess is carefully wiping her cheeks.

« I don’t understand why we couldn’t help him. » Leia voice breaks entirely and the elder woman puts a hand over her mouth to stifle a sob before it can be heard.

Shutting her eyes, Rey entangles her fingers with Ben’s. « He was struggling. » Her voice is hoarse from lack of being used and she makes no attempt at fixing this. « I saw it. In his mind. But things changed in the temple. »

« I sent him there to bring him to safety. I knew Luke could help him control it. I don’t get why it didn’t work. »

« I do. » answers Rey, almost on autopilot. Does she have the right to tell his mother the whole story? Can she really deal with the consequences of reveling something so huge? She feels Leia’s eyes on her, nearly burning the side of her face.

«Ben resisted to the dark side, until someone pushed him to embrace it. He had no other choice. » She feels the urge of reaching out to rub his forehead and is once again shocked by the relative coolness of his skin as her fingers drag over him.

« You talk as if you knew everything about him. » says Leia in a soft tone.

« I do. » the words leave her mouth with a confidence she doesn’t even question. She knows him. Almost all of him. What she doesn’t know she will discover soon enough, and she hasn’t a single doubt about the fact that she will accept everything, even what can’t be forgiven.

It’s him, and she can’t live without him. That’s the bottom line of everything.

« Will you tell me? » Leia pauses and hesitates, her fingers slightly twisting together. « Someday? »

« He will… when he is ready. » Rey finally meets Leia’s eyes and if the elder woman wants to express her worry about him never coming back, she decides to keep it for her.

***

**Falleen**

**Kira’s office – A few hours later.**

**Incoming call from the unofficial New First Order Headquarters – Merisee’s orbit**

 

 « As you requested, we spread the news among our ranks and allies regarding our Supreme Leader’s status. But it appears we have a credibility problem. » Mitaka’s face looks calm but determined and Kira can tell that he is easily falling into the leader’s routine.

Kira slowly paces in her office, looking lost in thoughts. « You are in direct contact with those people. Is there a way to buy more time? » She stops and looks at the holographic feed displaying the usually quiet commander.

« No, Milady, I believe it would be unwise. Our words have been questioned, and with the repeated propaganda broadcasted by General Hux, we are slowly losing our position within the universe. »

« Except for the fact that he is telling a lie. He doesn’t have any of us in custody and if he keeps promising a public trial and execution, people will soon realize that nothing is happening. We are at a standstill. »

« Milady, if I may, now is perhaps the time to prepare another kind of move. » tries the commander, some traces of his usual shyness showing through his schooled features.

«  What would you suggest ? » once again, Kira surprises herself. Is she really trusting an army member to the point she is asking for advice? She quickly dismisses that thought. Of course that she trusts him. That man, despite his personal flaws bought them time which allowed them to be rescued. Without him, none of them would be on this base, waiting for their leader to wake up.

« I know you can’t make a declaration because people would understand that the Supreme Leader is currently incapacitated. But… we need a victory. A sign that you are perhaps following him in a particular quest to hit the traitors where they least expect it. Then we can communicate around it and turn the tables on Hux. »

Pondering for a bit, Kira lets her mind wander. They need something big. Something that would make a huge difference. A symbol.

They need to destroy a symbol…

***

**Later that night**

**Rey’s room**

 

Rey dozes off from time to time but as soon as her mind finds some kind of peace, she regains consciousness, because… there can’t be any peace without him.

The fourth times, she misses the two blue figures appearing out of the corner of her eye. Nothing truly matters to her. She is not really here because he isn’t here either.  She doesn’t see them focusing their energy on her, nor does she feel that they are dragging her to unconsciousness.

Her last thought, when her head hits the pillow next to Ben’s, is that she wants to join him, wherever he is.

***

What she sees next is a kind of cave with carvings on the walls. All of this looks very ancient and as she walks through the natural halls, she notices she is feeling neither hot, nor cold. She sees some light from a distance, perhaps an exit? Her feet bring her closer and closer and with each step, her body seems to function better.

She stops at the entrance. Somehow, she knows that getting in there will imply something important. The voice she hears behind her is one she hasn’t heard in a long while.

« It has been quite some time. »

Rey turns in time to meet Qui Gon’s peaceful gaze.

« Where am I ? » asks the young woman.

The Jedi knight looks around, giving himself a few seconds in order to carefully select his words.

« You are at a crossroad. » he finally answers, holding his hands together.

« A crossroad? » Her voice rises perhaps a little too much, but she instinctively knows she has to show some patience and makes sure to keep her emotions in check.

« Here, you will make an important decision for your future. » Qui-Gon turns his eyes toward the entrance. « You are not the first to experience a force bond of this magnitude. It happened once to people like you, trained on opposite sides. »

« Revan and Bastila. » she replies without hesitation.

« Their unity has been a blessing for the universe and for the force. Together or apart, they accomplished many things, some of them with wonderful outcomes. » Adds the force ghost.

«This doesn’t tell me what I am doing here, Master Qui-Gon.» states Rey.

The hint of a smile appears on the master jedi’s lips. « Rey, there is a reason why Bastila and Revan were so united. »

« Their love. » answers Rey with a certainty she doesn’t even question.

« Love can divide as much as it can unite. There was something else. » carefully explains the elder man.

« I’m not sure I am following you. » replies the young woman, her eyebrows slightly furrowed.

« At some point, they each had to give a part of themselves to save the other.»

Rey can see in Qui-Gon eyes that he is expecting some kind of realization from her, but she doesn’t exactly understand what she needs to find.

« Ben brought you back, Rey. He gave a part of his own strength to wake you up. » explains the master Jedi.  « He did it after Bastila and Revan enhanced the bridge between the two of you. »

 The elder man raises a hand when he sees Rey showing signs of confusion. « They wanted to restore the balance between the two of you. Ben saw this as an opportunity to bring you back where you belong. »

Rey may be in some kind of limbo, she still feels like her chest is madly constricting at the idea of Ben being conscious enough to be able to make decisions of this kind. «What do you know about Ben’s current condition? » presses Rey, any kind of restrain vanishing from her attitude.

« Quiet your mind, Young Rey. I know quite a lot and I will explain all you need to know but first, I need you to answer to one crucial question. What is the biggest sacrifice you could make to bring Ben back? »

« I’d give my life. » Her eyes instinctively go back to the cave entrance, something calling her there.

« If you are sincere, then get into the cave. » Qui-Gon watches as Rey takes the final steps in.

***

Looking at the ceiling, Ben Solo recognizes some of the carvings left there by dozens of generations of force users. Some can still be translated. The meaning of others is probably lost for good, but all of them represent the legacy of legions of force sensitive people. He knows he’ll be a part of this in the end because the force is neither dark nor light and it never divides. Divisions are made by people, out of greed for power or greatness, each one of them having their own definition for it.

He feels her behind him but doesn’t turn around for now. He merely tilts his head toward her.

« Ben ? » The trembling of her voice nearly kills him, but he knows that watching her face would be too hard for him to handle.

She can’t have it that way. She can’t… she runs to him, ready to embrace him from behind…

But when she gets close, all she feels is air, and her arms close around nothing. She slowly looks up toward the back of his head, her arms slowly dropping.

« He isn’t truly here, Rey. And neither are you. Your physical forms are on Falleen. » Qui-Gon remains near the entrance, his ghost form more solid than usual.

« I didn’t expect to see you again. » Ben’s voice is low but the sorrow in it is more than obvious.

« Why? Why wouldn’t you see me again? You are back to safety. All you need to do is to wake up! I am right there with you! » She takes an unnecessary shaky breath and in the back of her mind, she is starting to understand that her body back in her room is probably displaying the reactions of her turmoil.

« Because I am not supposed to wake up. » Ben slowly turns and in his eyes, she sees that he has already surrendered… but… why?

« What? But… you can’t leave me! You promised! You said you would come back! » She is torn between sadness and anger. Surely, he wouldn’t do something like this! Why would he leave her? Why do they always leave her?

« Don’t you see it? I needed you to wake up! » He replies in a strong tone. His hand rises to touch her face, but he remembers that he will go right through her if he does so.

« What did you do? » She nearly screams, and she knows that her face back on Falleen is probably soaked with tears.

« I couldn’t let you go… Rey, you are so much more important than I’ll ever be… I made so many mistakes, but you are a beacon of light… you are Hope… » His eyes lower, unable to take the sadness and betrayal he reads in hers.

« WHAT DID YOU DO?» A low rumble fills the cave before the walls start shaking.

« He gave him some of his life essence to bring you back… Part of the life you hold in you is his life force. » explains Qui-Gon, his hands joined before him.

« Take it back! » she demands, her hands moving in fists.

« No sweetheart… I can’t… I… I won’t. » he tries to rise his hand again but she steps back and turns to face Qui-Gon.

« How do we reverse it? »

 « Rey… » starts Ben.

« No! » she shouts, turning again toward him. « I’ll never give up on you! Either we find a way to bring you back with me, or I’ll leave with you. But you are not leaving me, Ben Solo. Do you hear me? You will not force me to live in a world without you! »

Looking back at Qui-Gon, she takes a deep breath, forcing herself to quiet the turmoil in her mind. « How do I bring him back? »

« It’s going to request a lot of strength and focus and I can’t be sure it’s going to work. » replies the old Jedi master.

« Find a way. You said Bastila and Revan did something to us. That means force ghosts can act over the world. Surely some of them can help us. »

« I wish it would be that easy, Rey. » Looking at Qui-Gon, Rey can tell that he holds back a lot of things… things that she can’t bring herself to care about for the time being.

« Make it easy. » she quickly replies before turning to look at Ben. « I may be a beacon of light and hope… but I will never be that anymore without you. Ben, I am what I am because of you. You heard Snoke. I am the light that meets your darkness… what would I become without you? »

« A Jedi master. » he flatly replies, his eyes back on her face.

« An old fool extracted from the world and feeling nothing anymore. Chasing peace and pretending to be able to experience unconditional love but being secretly dead inside.  I am not a Jedi, Ben. Just as you are not a Sith, or a knight of Ren, or whatever the dark side calls its champions these days. You know it as I know it. »

His slightly shaky voice is barely heard as he steps closer, invading her private space. « All I want is to know that you are going to live. »

« I am going to live… if you live. I will find a way to bring you home. » she whispers back, her hand moving up a mere inch away from his heart before her form vanishes all together.

***

**Falleen**

**Kira’s office – The next morning.**

 

Topic: First Order’s broadcast on all the planets from the Core.

[Decoding and reencoding videofeed]

…

…

…

« Citizens of the New Empire, this is Supreme Leader Hux. As stated in our previous broadcasts, the remnants of Kylo Ren’s army are in disarray. Soon, their forces will be permanently obliterated. To the communities having decided to join force with them, I will say this. Surrender now to the New Empire, and your case will carefully be examined.  We will forgive those that have been deceived by the usurper.

To the Resistance and the handful of criminals allied to its members, your time is up. We will find you and we will destroy you. No terrorist action will be left unpunished. No illegal actions will be tolerated. We will follow you everywhere until the last one of you is exterminated. A new era has come, one where the citizens of the new empire will be protected from deviant actions.

All hail the New Empire and its supreme Leader! »

Leia opens her eyes when the transmission dies. Watching her hands joined on her lap, she lets out a soft sigh. « Must they always use the same lame rhetoric? »

She raises her eyes in time to meet Poe’s who is smirking from his spot, near the window.  « Why, of course, General, they need to sound like the villains they are. »

Finn rolls his eyes but keeps his arms tightly wrapped around Rose, who is leaning against him, her back against his chest.

Kira sits on the edge of her desk, her arms folded. « Hux is lying. Our forces have regrouped to safety and they are waiting for our command. We are trying to reverse the effects of his propaganda, but we would need an official statement… one we can’t make since Ben is…» she briefly grits her teeth then nods. « … since he isn’t waking up. »

The leader of the knights of Ren tries to simultaneously ignore the flash of pain in Leia’s eyes, the clenching of Poe’s teeth and the slightly exasperated sigh coming from Finn. She briefly looks at the corner of her room and meets Jelan and Daine’s eyes.

Both men nod at her and this gives her the push she needs to reveal what they have been planning for most of the previous night. « This is why we must do something big. Something that will alter the credibility of Hux’ control. »

« And what is that, exactly? » Asks Poe, his eyes now glued on the woman he loves.

She turns to face him and gets the clear feeling that he is going to fight her on what she is about to reveal. « Hux is building another Starkiller. We are going to destroy it. »

« On top of the same lame rethoric, they also have to use the same lame weapons over and over again. » objects Leia before rubbing her forehead.

« Destroy it? And how do you expect to destroy it? » Asks Poe, his eyes slightly narrowing. « To do that, you need to know the base’s map and you need to find a loophole. »

« It’s not that hard. » says Daine, from his corner. « We know the specifics of the last Starkiller base and the technology can’t have evolved too much, given the way the weapon is being powered. »

« You are planning on going in blind. » States Poe, his tone slightly disbelieving.

« We are running out of time. » objects Kira, which earns her a very strong glare from the man used to watch her with stars in his eyes.

« A suicidal mission won’t bring you anywhere. » nearly growls the resistance commander.

« Staying hidden will only increase the danger around us all. We can’t let Hux’s organization invade the whole universe and do nothing. This guy is mental, even more so than Snoke was. And he won’t stop until we are all destroyed. » Kira’s green eyes are now narrowed, the tension in the room becoming more than obvious.

« Then at least, try to find some valuable data before attacking! There could be shields or fail safes that weren’t implemented in the first version of the base. I don’t think the engineers working for Hux are dumb enough to repeat the same mistakes twice. » Spits Poe before looking at Finn and Rose.

« The basic technology is the same since it’s been powered through Kyber Cristal. There aren’t many ways to exploit the properties of that mineral. » replies Rose who is already imagining where the weaknesses of the system could be.

« We communicate with the kyber. » Jelan looks at Poe from his corner and everyone turn to face him.

« It’s not just a mineral. » taking out his lightsaber, he ignites the blade and looks up at its red hue. « Kybers and force users are linked. This is why the color of our blade changes according to our duty or to our deeds. »

« Luke told me something like this once… his was green because he was a peace keeper… Ben… Ben created a blue one… » Leia lowers her eyes « He was set to be a guardian fighting for the light side. »

« And he had to dive into darkness instead, which turned his blade red. » finishes Daine, his voice devoid of emotion. « Like Jelan said, the kyber communicates with us and links itself to us. If we go there, all five of us, we might be able to act on the kyber core. »

« That’s what you are planning? » erupts Poe. « You want to talk to a stone? »

« We want to make a difference! » replies Kira, fire in her eyes.

« Just the five of you? » nearly screams the pilot.

« Just the Five of us plus Ben and another we have lost along the way was what kept us alive for the past 6 years, Poe! »

He drops his hands in disbelief then looks at Leia. « We can’t allow this. This is madness. »

« What you can’t allow doesn’t apply to us. We are not resistance members. » cuts Daine, his blonde hair falling slightly in front of his eyes.

Leia doesn’t move but keeps her eyes locked with Poe and that’s when he gets it. No matter what he’ll say, Kira is going to go in. In record time, he leaves the room to get to the hangar bay.

***

Kira joins him under his X-Wing a few minutes later. His hands are already covered in grease and BB-8 is rolling around, emitting a series of diagnostic noises.

« You need to accept this. » she starts, her tone a bit too angry for his liking.

« Oh do I? » he spits, throwing his tool on the ground. « You are about to throw yourself into the Sarlacc’s pit and I simply have to nod and watch! »

« This is the only way we have found to buy time! He is not waking up, Poe! He is not coming back and if our allies understand that, then they will surrender to Hux! » Her hands are in fists, her teeth are clenching and he can see how deeply angry she is.

Taking a step back, Poe turns to one of the wings of his ship and inspects it. « If I let you go, you’re not coming back. » He says after a bit.

« You don’t know that. » She snaps her nostrils flaring.

« I know war, Kira. I’ve known many sides of it and I can see when the odds aren’t on our side. And yes, I said ours. Not yours. You and your friends may think we are not in the same line of command… we are. Resistance, former First Order, former Snoke soldiers, there is going to be only one way to make it to see another day and that’s through unity. » his head slightly turns and in a flash, he meets her green eyes.

« Then help us. Starkiller 2 is a symbol we need to take down. We can’t let him have a step ahead. » replies the young woman, frustration obvious in her voice.

« Two days. » he nearly growls.

« What? »

« Give me two days to try and gather data. If I fail, we’ll go on with your plan. With a resistance escort. You are not doing this alone. » His eyes are narrowed and she can see his jaw clenching.

Kira gives him a brief nod then turns to get back to her office.

« Kira. » He calls, when she is almost ready to exit.

The young woman turns but only sees his back as he is working on a wing that apparently doesn’t need any maintenance.

« You’re not alone anymore. » He adds without turning back.

* * *

 

 

 

 


	51. Between the lines

* * *

**Part 51: between the lines**

**Unofficial New First Order Headquarters – Merisee**

**3 days later.**

 

« Merisee, this is Black Leader, do you copy? »

As he comes to the console, Dopheld Mitaka reads the data identifying the resistance ship. The young commander nods at his communication officer then waits, his hands behind his back.

« Black Leader, this is Merisee’s First Order Base. You are clear to land, landing pad alpha 12. »

« Roger that. Black leader, going down. »

As soon as he hears the confirmation from Poe Dameron, Dopheld Mitaka leaves the command center, perfectly decided to be at the head of the welcoming party.

***

Maneuvering his ship into Merisee’s orbit, Poe Dameron immediately sets a course to the correct landing pad, lifting his eyebrow as he translates the series of frantic beeps BB-8 is emitting.

« Yeah, Buddy, I know, I know. It’s ironic. »

BB-8 blurts out a few screeching noises and Poe can’t help but chuckle.

« Tell me about it. Landing on a First Order base instead of trying to bomb the hell out of it… »

Poe’s black and orange X-Wings makes a final turn before landing.

« Here goes nothing BB-8. Remain with the ship and stay on alert, but don’t engage the weapons. We don’t want them to believe we are hostile. »

After pressing a button to open his cockpit, Poe Dameron removes his helmet and runs a hand into his curly hair. It’s not long before he climbs down from the cockpit and reaches the landing pad. Out of the corner of his eyes, he spots a young man in a uniform, followed by two troopers not wearing their helmet, with their weapons down.

« Commander Dameron? » says the young man before extending his hand. « I am Commander Dopheld Mitaka. Welcome to Merisee. »

Without any hesitation, Poe shakes the young man’s hand.

« You were the one in charge during Zelno’s Battle. » states the resistance leader.

« Appointed by Milady Tarath Ren right before the battle. » replies the First Order commander without a trace of overconfidence. « We did what needed to be done to save our supreme Leader and his knights.  Please, follow me. »

 Mitaka turns and leads Poe inside, his hands behind his back.

« Have the knights contacted you? » cautiously asks the resistance pilot.

« They are in position on the dark side of the natural satellite orbiting near the construction site. The first communications we had with them confirmed what we were suspecting. Starkiller 2 is in its completion phase and will be ready for charging within the next few days.»

« We don’t have much time then. » replies Poe as both men come in a private office.

« Milady wishes to launch the operation within the next 12 hours. »  If Mitaka notices the darkness clouding Poe Dameron’s eyes at the prospect, he doesn’t say anything. « I trust you came here for a reason. » he adds, looking at the pilot expectantly.

Poe nods before rubbing his chin. « Several, in fact. First of all, I made contact with most our allies through the galaxy. They will attack strategic points in their own area as soon as Starkiller’s operation starts. I will need a timing as accurate as possible as soon as you can give it to me, this way, the resistance base will be able to give our allies the signal to proceed. »

« You will have this information as soon as we have the final words from the knights. » says the first order commander with a nod.

« I also contacted the smuggling rings to see if they can find any data which may circulate about Starkiller 2.  So far, all they gave us is old news but that could also mean that what the knights suspect is true. The technology could mostly be the same as Starkiller. »

« I ordered a full archive search, cross-referencing the amount of credits that vanished and the supplies that went missing along the way for the construction. Between this and the hidden fleet Hux is currently using, I have been able to track the construction of Starkiller 2 back to around the same time Starkiller 1 was first used. I think Starkiller 1 was a prototype supposed to lead to the construction of several others. » replies Mitaka, his eyes slightly hardening.

« That would be consistent with Starkiller 2 being a replica. If we manage to take this weapon down, this will be a huge blow for Hux’ credibility. » Poe Dameron runs his fingers through his hair once again, adrenalin rushing in his system.

« And this hopefully will be the beginning of his downfall. » says Mitaka in a way showing why, despite his young age and soft appearance, he is one of the leaders.

***

**Starkiller 2 construction site – unknown regions**

Kira presses two buttons on the console of the upsilon class command shuttle she currently hides in.  She reads again the logs recording the observations made by the sensors she sent on orbit around the massive planetary weapon as soon as they exited hyperspace.

This is going to be tricky and she knows it. Going under the shield will be a first challenge, but it will be nothing compared to the massive sabotage operation they are going to have to perform.

Turning her head, her eyes drift toward her companions gathered in the main space behind her. Jelan and Daine are certain they can communicate with the kyber powering the planet. She isn’t so sure about that… not with such a massive amount of material to deal with.

Her head rests against the back of the pilot chair as she looks toward Nervan and Adara.  The two lovers are sitting on the floor in front of each other, their hands touching and Kira knows they are silently communicating in a way she will never fully understand.

She looks back at the star field through the duraglass and idly wonders what Poe Dameron, pilot extraordinaire and rogue spirit at heart is up to. The last time she saw him, he made her swear to return to him, and she can still feels the warmth of his lips on hers as well as the intense grip of his fingers over her arms.

If she was force bonded to him like Adara is with Nervan, then surely, she would know. Surely she would feel him in her bones in a way more than absolute. Instead, she is left with doubts and worries like a normal person.

Kira doesn’t hear Jelan who joins her and settles in the copilot seat.

« I went once more through the technical information we have for Starkiller 1. » He says, his hands resting on the arms of the chair.

« Did you find anything valuable? » replies Kira, her eyes still fixed on the stars.

« I believe so.  There were maintenance accesses going down to the kyber core. If Starkiller 2 features the same things and if we can go down one of them, we’ll be in direct contact with the crystal. »

« Easier than focusing from the surface while being potentially out in the open. » Her eyes remain stuck on the star field above them in a way that doesn’t fool Jelan.

« It’s going to work, Kira. We are going to destroy this thing and go home. »

« Define home. » she adds almost instinctively.

« That’s where our brotherhood is complete. That’s where Ben is. » replies the knight with no hesitation.

« Do you think he will wake up? » Kira hates the fact that her voice is uncertain as she asks that question but a part of her can no longer bury the vulnerability she sometimes experiences. Maybe that’s because Snoke is gone and Ben is reverting to the young man she was following in the first place…

Or maybe that’s what Poe does to her…

Him again…

Everything in her mind always go back to him.

« Yes. He will come back. And then, we’ll obliterate Hux and his order of chaos. Snoke’s legacy needs to be destroyed for good. »

Kira finally tears her eyes from the starfield to look at Jelan. What she finds in the eyes of her companion instantly quiets her mind.

Yes, Ben will wake up, and even if their mission fails, He will stand, along with Rey and both will put an end to the chaos Snoke then Hux tried to spread through the whole galaxy.

***

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room**

Each time he comes into that room, Finn gets the same disturbing feeling of déjà-vu.

Rey is sitting next to Ben, holding his hand, her eyes focused on the sleeping man’s face. She looks like she is in a sort of trance… All right, Finn knows… this is probably some kind of force meditation…

Still, seeing his close friend with the man who has been the bane of his existence for so long chills him to the bones as much as it angers him.

Nevertheless, Finn tries to keep his animosity in check, given how emotionally involved his friend seems to be. This is why as he steps into that private space, he clears his throat then tells as softly as he can: « We are all set up and ready to take off. »

  Rey simply nods, her eyes not leaving Ben’s features.

« Chewie would like to know if you are going to… you know… come with us? » Finn tries as gently as he can.

« I won’t leave him, Finn. » is all she replies in a tone neither upset not tired. This is just the certainty of a woman who won’t leave behind the one she loves despite the grim prospects related to his health.

« All right. » he says, a bit defeated but not exactly surprised. « Rose believes she can remotely lower the shields to allow the knights to get on the surface undetected. »

« I’m sure she can. » the flat tone of Rey’s voice feels like a slap on Finn’s face. It’s like his friend no longer cares about anything unrelated to this guy.

« If it doesn’t work… » he tries before sighing.

« Then Hux will have the upper hand. Which is why I need to stay here. I need to wake him up, don’t you see ? » She briefly looks at the former stormtrooper before focusing back on Ben’s face. « He knows everything about the first Order, Snoke’s schemes and Hux.  He is our only true hope.»

« Rey… »

« Go, Finn. Go with the knights and help them in any way you all can. My place is here with him. »

Sighing, Finn shakes his head and mumbles: « May the force be with you. » before leaving the room.

 

***

**Hangar bay, one hour later**

Finn gives one last look toward the access to the main facility then lowers his eyes.

Roses’ fingers delicately wrap around his as she looks at his face. « Leia is in the cockpit. Chewie says it’s time to go. »

« I have a bad feeling about this, Rosie. Her, alone with him among smugglers … »

« She is a Jedi. She is one of the most powerful beings we know. I believe in her as does Leia, or else, she wouldn’t have left her here alone with that man. Come on, darling… they are going to need us soon.»

Finn looks back at his girlfriend and sighs. Rose, always the optimistic, is more ready for this than he’ll ever be, he knows that. She squeezes his hand, which forces a small smile on his lips. He knows how incredible this woman is. More than this, she is becoming his strength.

« Remember why we do this. » she adds, her other hand rubbing his biceps.

« We fight for the ones we love. » he replies without any hesitation.

« Yes. Our battlefield is on Starkiller 2. Hers is somewhere else for now… to save him. And saving him might also save us all. Believe in her, Finn. We aren’t Jedi but Leia is a force user with access to a knowledge we don’t have.  If she says that Rey needs to stay here, then leave her here. You’ll see her again, I promise, once we have all done what we need to do. »

« I fight for you. » is the only thing he can reply to this, his fingers entangling with hers.

« And I for you. » She replies before leaving a gentle kiss on his lips.

***

**Starkiller 2 construction site – unknown regions**

**A few hours later**

« It’s nearly time, Kira. » Daine comes close to the pilot seat, adjusting his armor pieces.

The young woman instantly stands and grabs the helmet she brought with her when she returned to the pilot chair after changing for the battle. She freezes for a moment, her eyes glued to the helmet.

« We don’t need them anymore.» he softly says, taking the helmet from her hands. « No more hiding. » he adds, his eyes searching hers.

Looking up at him, her green eyes harden a bit. « Lets get it over with. »

« For Ben. » Daine says, holding her gaze.

« And for all of us. » She adds, jutting her chin a little.

« Come on, let’s move! » says Daine as he turns to look at their companions: Jelan, slightly smirking, Nervan, his head inclined toward Adara and Adara, her head proudly raised and her fingers brushing over her lightsaber handle.

« Lets teach Hux not to mess with us. » turning away from them, Kira activates the ship’s communicator.

« Millennium Falcon, are you in position? »

After a few seconds, they hear a communication line being open and Roses’ voice coming up. « This is the Falcon we are in position and ready to initiate the hacking protocol. »

« Proceed. » replies Kira, a strange light in her eyes.

 _For Ben_ , she thinks. _For all of us_ , she adds, feeling her brothers and sister behind her.

« I’m on it. » replies Rose with confidence. 

 Her fingers slightly grip the console in front of her. She knows this isn’t all. Not anymore.

 _For Poe_ , she admits after a bit, and somehow, this realization gives her more determination than ever.

« You’re clear. » finally says Rose through the communication system.

Without hesitation, Kira initiates the sequence for taking off, leaving the natural satellite to join Starkiller 2’s surface.

« Let’s make it count. » She says raw determination in her voice.

***

**Starkiller 2 construction site – – Dark side of the Satellite’s orbit**

**Unknown regions**

**Millenium Falcon’s board**

«Black leader, this is the Falcon. » says Leia as she is sat in the copilot chair, her hair tightly wrapped around her head.

 « Commander Dameron, do you copy? » she adds, pressing once again the communication button.

Chewie lets out a long howl followed by a few grunts, his eyes remaining focused over the massive weapon in front of them.

« No, he is probably still on hyperspace with his squadron. » replies the general while shaking her head.

As if on cue, the whole black squadron materializes close to the Falcon.

« Black squadron reporting and ready to bomb things. » says the voice of Poe Dameron through the audio feed.

« Stand back for now, Commander. Phase one of the operation is in progress. Have our allies been informed of the timing? »

« Yes and the first wave of attacks should be in progress. » replies Poe with a bit of pride in his voice.

« Excellent. Remain on orbit close to us for now and wait for my command. We will provide a tactical support for the knights if their presence is noticed before they are done with their duty. » adds Leia, her tone calm and yet commanding.

Poe Dameron narrows his eyes and clenches his teeth before reluctantly replying: « Roger that. Black squadron standing back. »

 _For now_ , he adds in his head…

**Falleen**

**Rey’s room**

Rey stands at the bottom of the bed, her hands over Ben’s ankles.

« I know you are here. I know you are watching us. » she says, her tone neutral.

« I don’t care what you think or what you fear. He is the key. He is the solution and our only hope. Whether you believe that or not isn’t my problem. My problem is that if he remains on the other side, we won’t stand a chance. The galaxy won’t stand a chance. »

The grip on Ben ankles tighten just a bit. « I can’t be a champion of light without my counterpart in darkness. If he doesn’t return, we all know I will fall. It happened before to others who once were like us. »

Rey takes a hard breath to try and keep her anger in check.

« Who knows what will happen next?  Can we take that chance because you fear what Ben has become? »

A blue aura forms behind her. She doesn’t have to turn to know who is there.

« You once believed everyone could be redeemed. You did it with your own father. I am asking you, was it a mistake? »

« No. » the answer is simple and comes out in a soft tone.

« It will not be a mistake with him either. » adds Rey, her thumbs rubbing the inside part of Ben’s ankles.

 « Rey, it takes a lot of strength to tear a soul away from the other realm. » pleads Luke Skywalker.

« And it took a lot of faith in order to turn the tides and changes the fate of the galaxy. You and your sister did it once. Where is that different? »

« Faith is not all you’ll need for this. You’ll need support from the other side to grand you the accesses you’ll need. » replies the master Jedi.

« I have Qui-Gon on my side. » states Rey in a flat tone.

« That’s just one master. » says Luke.

« Yes. A grey one. Don’t deny it. I know everything about the middle way. » She doesn’t turn to see the surprise written on the force ghost’s face as she makes this statement. She has no time for games. Not when Ben remains desperately asleep.

« That would still not be enough. » replies Luke gently.

« Bastila and Revan… they already helped us by strengthening the bridge. They are on our side. They will do it. »

« Are you certain of this? » asks the force ghost.

« You will do it too. You know why. » cuts Rey.

« I will be here too. » the voice interrupting Rey is calm with a vibration betraying an intense power. The tone, enticing, carries also an edge that could make it seductive and even passionate.  Yet there is darkness in that voice, a darkness with a depth that should frighten the young woman… if she hadn’t been already so attracted by a darksider.

As she turns, she spots a tall force ghost, about Ben’s height. Like the man she loves, a scar bisects his face and his hair fall in waves over his shoulders. The intensity of his gaze is familiar as is the charisma rolling off him in waves.

She doesn’t have to wonder who he is. She instinctively knows the answer. Ignoring the shocked look on Luke’s face, Rey bows her head at the force ghost.

« Thank you, master Skywalker. » she adds as she looks into Anakin’s piercing eyes.

* * *

 


	52. Trials and errors

* * *

** Part 52 : Trials and errors **

**30 minutes since the beginning of Starkiller 2 operation**

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Rey’s Room**

Rey is adjusting the blanket over Ben’s body when Bastila materializes behind her.

« Revan and I have decided to help you save him. »

Rey turns and slightly nods. « Thank you. » she says, her hands resting over Ben’s chest.

« But it has to happen now. Revan is already with him. Lay down, young Jedi. I will bring you to them. »

Rey doesn’t object and climbs on the bed next to Ben. She instinctively takes his hand before looking at Bastila. « I am ready. »

« I must warn you. You might experience hurtful things especially because we don’t have enough time to prepare you. Too much is at stake. »

There is something troubling in the way the force ghost looks at Rey. A mix of worry, regrets and high expectations perhaps? « I can handle it. »

« Very well. Then… » Bastila waves a hand toward Rey before lowering her eyes. « Join me on the other side. »

***

**Razor space base. Ilum’s orbit.**

**Unknown regions**

The young officer entering the throne room in a hurry keeps his eyes lowered as everyone knows to do each time they are in the supreme leader’s presence.

The last few victories, or what has been described as such boosted Armitage Hux’s ego and few are the men daring to anger the one claiming to be the new master of the galaxy.

Especially because Hux uses execution as a way of managing his troops.

The poor man joining the dais knows that he is bringing bad news. He knows this could cost him his life not because he is responsible for the ordeal, but just because he is the messenger.

« Supreme Leader, I am afraid we got disturbing news coming from the core region. »

Hux’s piercing eyes nail the young officer on his spot.

« We are currently facing uprisings on Corellia, Ganthel and Tinnel IV. They all attacked at the same time.»

« The traders’ guilds… those people don’t know how to make allegiance in an appropriate way. Send the fleet to the core regions and kill the rebels. Every last one of them, including their families. It is time to purge the galaxy of their existence. »

« Sir I… » the young officer takes a deep breath before going on, his voice unsteady. « The fleet is currently either busy or under attack. We also discovered that Bastion, Bilbringis, Parnassos and Oosalon’s facilities have been sabotaged. »

Hux stands from the throne, his teeth bared and face taking a red color. « Are you telling me that some of our most sensible tactical positions are currently being compromised? Who is doing this? »

The young man is eyeing the blaster resting at Hux’s side and silently prays the force to be spared. « A… an alliance. We suspect an alliance between the traders’ guilds, the Resistance and… and… » 

« And the traitors! » spits Hux, fury filling his eyes. « Get back to the command center! I want every last man able to fight to be shipped to the positions currently under attack! I want everyone dead, and the leaders being put in custody and brought to me! Proceed! »

The young man turns and runs out of the throne room to relay the orders, not realizing yet that his life has been for now spared.

« REN! » screams Hux once he is alone in the huge space. « I WILL KILL YOU! I WILL DESTROY EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU! » He kicks the throne several times then leaves the room in a hurry to join the command center.

He’ll be damned if he isn’t the one putting this bastard of a darksider on custody.

***

**Starkiller 2**

Landing the upsilon class under the cover of the trees wasn’t hard to do. Thanks to Rose, who lured the facility’s sensors to make the system accept the security code sent by Kira, there have been, so far, no need to fight.

However, as they progress through the forest, the knights remain on alert. They know that since the base is almost ready to be put in service, several squadrons are already stationed here and the last thing they need is to be discovered too soon.

Jelan takes the lead of the group, since he is the one having memorized Starkiller’s plan. If  he is correct, and he is sure he is, the vent they need to use to get down to the kyber core shouldn’t be too far.

Kira keeps her hand on the handle of her lightsaber as she lightly runs behind him followed by the three others, her mind set on what needs to be done. Getting down, finding the core, spreading around it, making it resonate to generate conflict and chaos… and cracking it.

« It’s like with Ben’s saber. » had explained Jelan. « If the crystal cracks, it becomes unstable. No one will ever be able to build vents large and efficient enough to make sure the base can fulfill its duty. We don’t even have to make it explode. It will be beyond repair since everything has been built around the core. »  

It seems fairly easy. With Ben, it would have been, but without their leader, Kira remains cautious.

Jelan finally stops in front of a circular access going underground. Adara circles it and stands on the other side.

« The depth is quite impressive. » she says, not really seeing the bottom of the pit.

« We don’t need to get completely down. Halfway should be enough. There are service galleries that will allow us to settle for the force meditation. » replies Jelan with confidence.

« Shall we go, then? » Asks Nervan with his usual devil-may-care attitude.

Adara adresses him a seductive smile before jumping over the edge and proceeding to go down.

« That woman… » Mumbles her handsome lover before following her.

« When will they stop teasing each other while we are working? » asks Jelan, faking to be exasperated.

Daine climbs on the edge and looks at the dark haired knight in a way that could pass as arrogant. « When will you stop pretending it disturbs you? »

None of them notice that Kira has her eyes turned toward the sky, sending a silent promise to return unharmed to the man who wormed his way into her heart.

« Let’s go and finish this. » she says, prompting the two men to get back on focus.

***

**Spirit Plane**

**Trial room**

Rey comes back to her sense very slowly and before she can open her eyes, she realizes she can’t register any sensation about her surroundings, just an intense energy radiating off and to her, following what she analyses as the rhythm of her heart.

When she finally gets to open her eyes, the light is at first blinding. Then slowly, her vision adjusts and she realizes she is watching a dome with hundreds of portraits painted or carved into rounded panels.

Distant voices seem to whisper right in her ears in languages she doesn’t identify and yet, everything feels like home.

« Sit, young Jedi. »

Rey instantly recognizes the benevolent voice of Qui Gon Jinn and sits up, only to find herself being surrounded by high thrones set in a circle, each one of them carrying a force ghost.

_They are all here_ … she thinks as she discovers the whole assembly.

_Qui Gon, Bastila, Revan, Luke… my guides…_

« And even more. » Rey can’t tell if the biggest trait coming from that voice is the charm, the amusement, or the darkness hidden within.

She turns her head and meets without surprise Anakin Skywalker’s eyes.

« As you can see, we did not come to you alone. » adds the force ghost with a smirk.

At the opposite end of the circle, a voice rises. « We do not have much time, Anakin. The trial must start. »

Rey turns her head and meets the soft and yet sad eyes of a man harboring a beard and shoulder length hair.

« She needs to understand, Obi Wan. » patiently says Qui Gon.

« A trial? What do you mean? » asks Rey, standing in the middle of the assembly.

« Some of us have decided to call upon a soul trial to decide Kylo Ren’s fate. » Rey’s throat constricts when she hears Luke refer as his nephew under his evil alias.

« Kylo is gone. » she replies, her eyes meeting the faded blue orbs of the man she once saw as her potential guide.

« Rey. » sighs Luke. « Your judgment is clouded by your feelings. »

« As is yours by resentment. » The reply is sharp but said in a somewhat amused tone.

Luke immediately looks at his father, agony in his eyes.

« What is the difference between the boy and I, son ? » adds Anakin raising his scared eyebrow.

Bastila looks at Revan and for a moment, the connection between them brings peace within the assembly.

« Ben has been misguided by Snoke. That murderous snake manipulated him from the beginning. I saw it in his mind! » Rey takes a step closer and looks directly at Luke. «  And so have you. Snoke fed your fear. Surely you know that, now. He was conflicted but not lost to you. »

« Is that what he told you? » said Luke, unconvinced.

« We are here to testify about their bond. » cuts Revan, his head slightly inclined toward Bastila.

« Words are not needed between them. She knows. » adds the female force ghost in a peaceful tone.

« She sees beyond the lies and beyond the masks. She is linked to his soul and to the truth about him. » Revan’s voice is almost reverent as he describes something Rey never truly managed to define between her and Ben.

« Her words are true, for we can sense the deep conflict within him. » finally says Bastila, a soft smile forming over her lips as she looks at Rey. « She is his salvation, and him hers. »

« They are, together, the balance.  The one we once created.» adds Revan.

« The one I searched. » says Qui Gon.

« The one I never reached. » muses Anakin.

« The one you briefly achieved. » finishes Obi Wan as he looks at Luke. « The one that should have been had Leia accepted her fate by your side, as a knight. »

« She wasn’t made for this. » replies Luke, his eyes lowering.

« But her son is. Partly. With her.» Qui Gon waves his hand toward Rey then looks at the young woman. « Grey Jedi. A kind lost through time and history. Embracing both darkness and light as a necessity within the universe. »

« With life comes death. With death come life. » softly adds Bastila, her eyes on Luke. « When a force bond is created then severed by the other’s absence, the chaos within is pure agony. Luke… the universe will need our kind to survive in order to destroy the current threat. Rey is the last you trained and the beacon of light. But it will not remain so if Ben doesn’t come back to her. Grief will turn her. »

« Are you telling me that if we don’t interfere to have the force release Ben’s soul, then Rey will become a Sith? » says Luke, annoyed.

« There are things far worse than being a Sith, my son. » cuts Anakin in a chilling tone. « I became Vader after your mother’s life force was drained. When her light vanished, I had no beacon left and I fell… easily… greedily… like the ghosts were whispering me to do. You know the ghosts, Luke. You heard them in the cave on Dagobah. »

Luke lowers his eyes, the memory haunting him even in the afterlife.

« I will fall without him. I know I will. » pleads Rey. « Something inside me… is linked to him. It is tight and strong, and the more we are separated, the more I feel this… this beast in me… that doesn’t care… that only searches for him… that is angry… all the time. »

« You believed in my redemption and you saved me. Why can’t you believe in Ben? » Anakin asks his son, his face neutral.

« Because I know what he is capable of doing.» replies after a pause.

« I did far worse. I destroyed Alderaan. » Anakin lifts an eyebrow, his son flinching.

« You know what Snoke made of him. But Snoke is gone. » calmly says Obi Wan. « This is not what troubles you, Luke. This is not the reason why you are reluctant. The real reason is that you can’t face the part you played in what happened that night, in the temple. »

« My padawans died, Obi Wan. Nothing can excuse this.» quickly replies the force ghost before being cut by Rey.

« This is hardly reflecting the truth and you know this! »

Everyone turns to look at the young woman who now has her hands in fists. « Some of your padawans attacked the others because they were harnessing a different side of the force and unfortunately, everyone fought for their life. »

« They were using the dark side, Rey! Nothing can excuse this! » says the force ghost, standing from his throne.

« They were scared children! They were teenagers hearing day after day that their feelings, their perceptions were to be corrected! And suddenly, in the middle of the night, the rightful ones come to them to slaughter them! The truth, master Luke, is that darkness exist outside of the force too and being a Jedi doesn’t make you a good person! »

« How can you say that? » Luke’s voice rises, anger obvious in his eyes.

 « Kira was 12! » Rey takes a hard breath, holding Luke’s gaze which briefly fills with regrets. « A child. An orphan. Like me. Lost. Seeing those like hers being killed. »

« She is right, Luke. » cuts Anakin. « Rejection creates a path to the dark side. »

Rey turns to look at Luke’s father, and for a moment, she is almost shocked to see the sorrow written on his face. She has seen that before… in Ben.

« The Jedi council I knew was rejecting any sign of darkness. But darkness is part of the Universe. Their rejection led me straight to Palpatine because I was lost and I was looking for understanding. An understanding the Jedi council refused me. All of us, in that room, we have at some point followed the Jedi Code, and yet, all of us also strayed from it. Bastila, Revan and I fell to the dark side before coming back. Master Qui Gon was never a true Jedi but a grey one in hiding and so were you, Obi Wan. As for you, Luke, we both know what you saw in that cave, in Dagobah. You know what it means. »

Looking back at Rey, Luke sits and remains silent.

« There is a war going on out there and general Hux is leading it. Millions of people are already dead but I know deep in my heart that if I return on the battlefield with Ben, we will change the tides. Please, Master Luke… he is our last hope. »

« You both are. » softly adds Bastila. « As a unit. Through your bond. »

***

**Starkiller 2 construction site – – Dark side of the Satellite’s orbit**

**Unknown regions**

 

« The operation started only 2 hours ago, Poe. This is not a direct attack. This is sabotage and sabotage means infiltration, you know that. » says Leia as she sighs. It’s one thing to deal with a trigger-happy Poe Dameron, but the worried boyfriend version is clearly worse!

She hears him groan from his cockpit.

« Can’t Rose make us go through undetected like she did with the knights? We could be there as a support should their operation be discovered. »

« Poe, you are piloting X-Wings… She can simulate transponder answers but she can’t make your ship invisible! » The former princess can’t believe she is having this conversation with such a seasoned pilot! Dameron truly is out of his damn mind!

« I could use the Solo trick… » he suggests.

« Don’t you dare! » She snaps, her eyes widening as she looks at Chewbacca. « Poe Dameron, you and your Squadron will remain on standby around the Falcon until I say so! »

Chewie gives a long howl before shaking his head.

« Tell me about it. » Mumbles Leia while rubbing her forehead.

She is instantly cut by an message coming from Starkiller 2.

« General Organa, we are in position around the Kyber core.» Kira’s voice sounds a bit distorted, probably due to the depth her and the knights reached under the surface.

« Very well. » Replies Leia. « Is it what you were expecting? »

There is no answer for a while, but what comes next sounds disturbing.

« It’s much bigger. According to Jelan, the core is twice the size of the one powering Starkiller 1.»

Chewie gives several quick howls that Leia cuts with a hand up.

« Can you crack it like you planned? »

« We might not be enough. » the reply is quick, and it instantly fills Leia with grief.

***

**Razor space base. Ilum’s orbit.**

**Unknown regions**

« What do you mean, we have no unit left to spare? Are you telling me that all our forces are currently engaged in battles?» Hux is seething, his face red, his eyes injected with blood and his breathing coming out in sharp waves.

« Several of our tactical positions are under attack, my lord, and we had to send reinforcements to stop the rebellion. » quickly replies the commander currently in charge.

« This is unacceptable ! Where are the units that I was promised? » he yells, fury in his eyes.

« We have troubles recruiting and our latest harvests for the conditioning program are still in training. » replies the commander, fully aware of the danger he is currently in.

« Then we are going to have to use Starkiller ! » snaps Hux.

The commander thinks twice before replying, disbelief written in his eyes. « My lord, Starkiller hasn’t been tested yet. Its systems are not fully operational yet. »

« it will have to do ! » barks the would be supreme leader, several veins busting in his eyes.

***

**Spirit Plane**

**Trial room**

« We have to make an important decision, one that might alter the course of the Universe. » says Obi Wan. « A long time ago, a master decided to take me as his padawan when the others wanted me to leave the academy. He saw something in me no other could see. He sees similar things in Ben Solo. Without him, I could have been Ben Solo … » The elder Jedi looks at his former mentor with admiration and bows his head. « I will follow your guidance again, Master. And if you say we must help the boy wake up, I will join in the effort. »

Qui Gon gives his former padawan an enigmatic smile then gives a brief look toward Anakin.

« I know what it feels like when a mind is poisoned. Ben was already in danger long before his birth and struggled for years before finally giving in. He is my grandson, and I share the responsibility of his demise. But he can be someone else. He can be what I should never have stopped being. I will help him wake up. »

Anakin looks at his fellow force ghosts before focusing on Rey as if he was seeing right through her. Not one to let herself be impressed, she looked toward those she considered as her best allies… Bastila and Revan.

« We believe… » starts the man, « that through your bond, you can make a difference. We are convinced you can change the face of the galaxy if you work together. »

Bastila addresses Rey a soft smile before raising a hand. « This journey might sometimes be painful, and marked by sacrifices. Are you willing to go through this? »

 « This is no limit to what I would do to stop this madness and be with him. » replies the young jedi with honesty.

Luke Skywalker looks up in a way that makes Obi Wan smile as he recognizes the same signs of frustration the master Jedi was displaying as a padawan when he first started his training on Tattooine.

« Luke. » calmly says Qui Gon. « You are the last to speak and your words will seal Ben Solo’s fate. »

Frowning, Luke Skywalker raised a hand. « Wait a minute. If the majority voted in his favor, why do you need me to do the same? »

« Because you are the one holding him back. » calmly replies Qui Gon. « You are the biggest weight on his mind as well as his biggest fear. »

Shame flashes over Luke’s face, his pale eyes lowering as a result.

« You know this already, because you confirmed it on Ahch-To before I left you there. You said the last thing you saw that night in the temple were the eyes of a frightened boy whose Master had failed him. Ben Solo gave up the night you nearly attacked him. He stopped fighting Snoke’s words because in his mind, the last of his family members that could help him had rejected him. He had nowhere else to go. Neither him, nor those that became his knights. » states Rey, her hands joined in front of her.

« What if he falls again? The dark side is enticing. » groans Luke.

« There is something stronger and more enticing than the dark side. Something that will bring him back, should he stray again. »  cuts Bastila before adressing a knowing smile to her eternal companion.

Revan brushes his fingers over her phantom hand then looks back straight at Luke. « The bond he share with Rey will anchor him. it cannot be broken. It cannot be bend and cannot be corrupted.  If you don’t believe in him, believe in her.»

Luke considers Rey for a good while and for a moment, he regrets not being hidden once again on Ahch-To, where no complication was set to occur. Can he make such a decision? Does he have the right to be a part of something like this, considering how things turned under his guidance? What are the odds for this to follow the right path?

_Never tell me the odds._

The memory of Han Solo’s voice crashes like a tidal wave in Luke’s mind. Han was fearless and saved the Galaxy more times than Luke can remember because he was never letting fear get the best of him.

Han would once again have tried to save Ben.

And Leia, poor Leia, left alone with all that weight on her shoulders, what does she want? Can Luke truly believe her words pronounced on Crait out of despair?

_No one is ever truly gone_. Luke believes that. But can he apply this to his own nephew? Can he look past the horror of that night in the temple?

And for the first time ever, as he remembers that night, he doesn’t feel his fear first, or his worry. He doesn’t see his temple devoured by the flames, or the mangled bodies of his deceased padawans.

He sees Ben frightened eyes.

He remembers the boy he had loved so much. That troubled child who was a prey before he even got the chance to take his first breath.

The one he failed to help.

« Will you truly be able to stop him, if he strays ? » asks the Master Jedi, carefully choosing his words.

« I believe in him. If he does, I’ll bring him back. » softly replies the young woman, understanding the fragility of the moment. « I’ll always bring him back. » she adds, looking into Luke’s eyes to give more strength to her words.

Luke then turns toward Qui Gon and simply nods his head.

* * *

 

 

 

 

 


	53. Confluence

* * *

**Part 53 : confluence**

**3 hours since the beginning of Starkiller 2 operation**

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Rey’s Room**

 

It’s like a journey back into the sensible world, and the first thing Ben feels is the pain of a body that remained motionless for too long. His mind is fogged, still. Where he was, there was no notion of time, or space, frozen, with just the feeling of being in a place where conflict and chaos didn’t exist.

He could have accepted his fate, and truth to be told, he had accepted it from the moment he had understood he could give another chance to Rey. His only regret was that terrible bargain… giving her his life force would separate them until the end of her years and by then, she could very well have forgotten him.

Until her, Ben had never imagined searching for a companion. He was too different. Too damaged. In his eyes, the concept of family was flawed. But Rey had ignited in him something violent and unavoidable.

Something stronger than the Force itself.

Something sacred.

He doesn’t know why things feel different, or why he is no longer in that strange cave. Then, slowly, through the pain caused by his muscles, he feels something strong and warm in his hand.

No. holding it. He wills his thumb to move and brushes it lightly over what feels like knuckles.

The warm air of the room assaults him next.

Something moves next to him. He tries opening his eyes, but for now, his body doesn’t cooperate too much.

Suddenly, the bed shifts and he feels a hand on his chest, then a voice, her voice, calls his name.

« Ben. »

And now, he wants to fight himself, fight his treacherous body because it’s her and they need to be reunited.

« Ben, please. » Rey releases his hand and craddles his head, her forehead gently pressing against his.

« Don’t leave me here. They said they would help you. »

He feels some drops of liquid fall on his cheeks. Are those her tears or his ? He can’t be sure, because her words move him more than anything else could have ever done to him.

« Come back to me, or let me join you. I don’t want to remain in this world without you. »

The weakness in her voice, far from annoying him, ignits something in his chest. Nothing will keep them apart, he decides. Where Snoke and the rebellion failed, his own weakness will not succeed.

Ben calls upon the Force with all he has. If he never managed to fully harness the force healing techniques, he will still try to use them in order to fully wake up.

For her.

After what feels like an eternity, his head moves back and mouth opens.

« Ben! » nearly screams the young Jedi, her hands brushing fast over his face. « That’s it, open your eyes! »

As if she was his master, his eyes crack open. She is a blur for now, but he knows it is truly her in front of him.

« It worked! » she says, her voice trembling and hands cupping his cheeks. « You’re back. You didn’t leave me. »

He can feel the warmth of her breath against his face, now, and the renewed wetness over his cheeks…

« Rey… » he half whispers, his voice raw from being unused.

« I’m right here… » Setting her lips against his, she tenderly brushes his hair back and finishes her sentence through their bond.

_I’m right here with you, my love._

***

**Starkiller 2 construction site – – Dark side of the Satellite’s orbit**

**Unknown regions**

 

« Allright, we’ve got to make a decision. » says Leia as she looks at Rose, Finn and Chewie who are all sitting on the lounge seats in front of the hologram board.

« They aren’t going to be able to succeed in full and only a few cracks might not be enough to destroy the whole weapon. So, we have two solutions, either we carry on with the plan but we switch to some more conventional sabotaging, or we withdraw and rethink our options. »

« Leia, » says Finn, a look of determination in his eyes. « We might not have another chance before they decide to use the weapon. We can’t afford taking the risk of losing millions of people for some miscalculations. I’m sure we can go to the surface and make sure we blow this thing up. Right ?» With that, he turns toward Rose who harbors a very unusual look of focus.

« I’ve thought about it. You said the knights will try to create some fracture lines through the crystal, but they won’t be able to fully crack it, right? » asks the beautiful brunette as she looks at the former princess.

« That’s what I said. » replied Leia with a nod.

« What if, once they are done, we make sure to drop bombs through the vents? We could create a chain reaction with the idea of impairing the generator part. We could deal with the rest later, and simply secure the fact that they won’t be able to attack with this weapon since the crystal will be damaged beyond repair. »

« I like this idea. » adds Finn, pride in his eyes for his girlfriend.

« Allright, if we decide to put this into action, how exactly are we going to drop the bombs in the right spots? This is far from being the Death Star and what my brother did then will not work for Starkiller even with a pilot as gifted as Poe. »

« We need to join the knights on the surface and plant the charges. » replies Finn before being cut by Chewbacca’s loud howls. 

Sadness fills Leia’s eyes as she understands the meaning of those sounds. « I know Chewie. But this might be our only chance. »

« What did he say? » softly asks Rose as she looks at her boyfriend.

« He thinks it’s a bad idea. See… it’s on a mission like this that we lost Han. » replies the former princess as she slowly sits before going silent.

***

**Starkiller 2**

Something definitely went wrong from the moment her team decided to split and circle the massive Kyber core hidden within the planet.

Kira should have known and a part of her brain keeps processing the idea that she should have foreseen that. This whole operation is probably going to cause their demise, leaving at the same time the galaxy between Hux’ hands.

Everything would have been different with Ben.

She tries to push this thought away as she crawls in a side vent, a gigantic portion of the crystal being visible through some durasteel grids. Reaching an opening, she crawls out and stands on a platform, considering the incredible glassy mass in front of her.

After a bit, her communicator activates to reveal Daine’s voice.

« I am in position on platform 8 and so is Jelan on platform 6. »

« Good. » replies Kira, her focus remaining on the crystal. « Adara and Nervan are already settled on platform 2 and 4 and I just reached 10. »

« That’s a huge Crystal. » mumbles Jelan in his communicator. « Not only that, but… do you feel that?»

« You can feel something different? I thought I was the only one... » cuts Adara as she activates her own communicator.

« It radiates in a way we have never felt before. » adds Nervan right after her.

« We need to try and communicate with it. » Daine says with a strength that doesn’t allow any questioning.

Jelan extends a hand toward the giant mass, and as he projects his ability toward the crystal, he feels like he is hitting a wall. Frowning, he tries again, this time, harder. « I can’t reach it. »He says after a while, more to himself than to the others.

« Same here. » Claims Adara. « Something is blocking me. Nervan?»

« I can’t get through either, my love. » replies the tall man in a dark voice.

Kira remains silent as she projects all she can toward the weapon’s core, her green eyes darkening in the process. She only stops when she hears Daine’s calm tone claiming something she really doesn’t want to hear.

« It’s useless. There are force suppressants in the area. We won’t be able to do anything. »

« This is impossible. » spits Jelan, furious. « The construction of this facility started while Starkiller 1 was still being tested. The designs are similar. »

« Similar, Jelan. » replies Adara with caution. « Not identical. Hux is not a complete fool. He fears force users. It’s only logical for him to pull something like that. »

« We need to get out of here fast before the contamination affects us too much. » adds Kira.

« Kira, we won’t have another chance. We need to do something while we are still close to that thing. »says Daine as he steps toward the edge of the platform. Looking down, it seems that the kyber crystal is endless, certainly partly powered by the planetary core. The blonde knight realizes that their quest is almost vain but doesn’t voice it as another idea forms in his mind.

«If we can’t make the crystal resonate, what do you want us to do? » replies the young woman.

« Find the source of the force suppressant and destroy it. Look, It has to be a biological thing affecting our bodies because the Kyber crystal is obviously unaffected. » Daine says as he is observing the space around him.

« No, it’s a radiation. » Cuts Jelan. « If you focus, you’ll feel it. And we need to get out of here before it weakens us to the point we won’t be able to remain conscious. »

« Jelan, if we leave now… » insists Daine before being cut again.

« What if it destroys the midi-chlorians in our bodies? Are you willing to take that risk and being cut from the Force forever? »  

« If this weapon remains operational, this is going to be the end of everything. » argues the blonde knight.

« I have another option. » Suddenly says Nervan. « We are going to get out of here like Jelan said but we are going to take action like Daine requests. »

« And how do you plan on doing that? » inquires Kira.

« We will need to use force projections from the surface, Like Rey did to be with Ben on Zelno and like Skywalker did to fight Ben on Crait. Force projections can act but can’t be affected by the environment. »

***

**Secured transmission: encryption protocol 24-CBG-485675**

**Rebel Alliance headquarters to Millenium Falcon**

 

[Decoding and reencoding audiofeed]

…

…

…

« General Organa, this is Echo base. We received a warning from the Tenjin Gang. Their contact on Ilum informed them that general Hux has left Razor space base at 8:00 galactic standard time on his mothership’s board. His destination is Starkiller site. Words are spreading among the stormtroopers about an imminent use of the facility. We are waiting for your command. »

The message is short but Leia can read right through it, because she knows Kaydel enough to hear the fear the young woman is trying to contain as she speaks. This had to be expected. Hux isn’t the kind of man to sit back and watch when he is simultaneously being attacked. His ego wouldn’t allow this to slip.

It is only logical for him to fetch his biggest weapon to try and retaliate even if said weapon is still in a test phase.

Leia feels the weight of Chewbacca’s look, and the silence coming from Rose and Finn has more or less the same meaning. Once again, she is expected to find the solution and once again she feels like she can’t fail, because failing means watching another planet explode.

Dismissing the image of Alderaan’s final moments forever burned on her retina, she tries to evaluate the possible outcomes given their current predicament.

The knights are going to try to sever but not destroy the kyber core. Black squadron is there in hiding to provide tactical support, but this is only a handful of X-Wings, as the rest of the fleet and their allies are engaged to disorganize Hux’ galactic defenses. The Falcon can help. But this will not be enough against a resurgent-class such as the Dominator.

Dragged out of her thoughts by a long meaningful howl, Leia considers the wookie next to her and shakes her head.

« I don’t know, Chewie. How long does it take to come from Ilum to here through hyperspace? »

Punching several buttons from the console, the Wookie emits several growls before howling and looking back at the general.

« Three standard hours. We need to contact the knights and see what they can do in such a short time. »

« Leia… let’s just do what we said and plant some charges in the facility. Everything else is too risky and we are running out of time. » Says Finn, convinced by their ability to succeed.

« Maybe that the knights can help us get in instead of trying to sabotage the core. And if Black squadron can come down and help us… » adds Rose, hope in her eyes.

There was a time where Leia conveyed this kind of hope. Time and the loss of too many loved ones killed that spark.

_Bail._

_Breha._

_Han._

_Amilyn._

_Luke._

_Ben._

_No. Not Ben. Ben is still here for now. Ben is returning, because Rey is bringing him home. They aren’t all gone._

She feels it again. It’s small but it’s there.

_No one is ever really gone._

« Oh, Luke. » she whispers, her eyes shutting. « What would you decide if you were here? »

She doesn’t hear any reply, but a clear image forms in her mind, picked from her memories. And she sees a handsome young man, his blond hair washed-out by Tatooine’s scorching sun and his blue eyes constantly shinning with hope despite all the harshness he has faced. He is in his orange pilot gear, and he is getting ready to strike the Death Star.

He wouldn’t give up no matter the odds.

« Chewie. » She calmly says, opening her tears filled eyes. « Link me to Poe. »

***

**Starkiller 2 construction site – – Dark side of the Satellite’s orbit**

**Unknown regions**

 

 « Black leader, this is general Organa. General Hux is on his way to the construction site on his mothership’s board and is due to get here in 3 standard hours by the quickest hyperspace corridor. »

Poe Dameron’s fingers twitch over the controls of his X-Wing and instant supply of Adrenalin rushing through his system.

« What is your command, general? » He asks, his eyes drifting toward the radar displaying Starkiller 2.

« I think it’s time to blow things up, Commander. We need to coordinate our actions with the knights because as soon as our ships are detected, the whole mission is going to be uncovered. »Replies Leia before adding in less commanding and more maternal tone. « Listen, Poe. We are a handful against a whole base and in less than 3 hours, a fully operational resurgent class is going to come and hit us. Do you think we can make it? » 

« We survived Crait, right? » replies the pilot in his usual daredevil tone.

***

**4 hours since the beginning of Starkiller 2 operation**

**Mining facility – Falleen**

**Rey’s Room**

 

There are shadows everywhere. Rey feels them as clearly as she feels the heat of Ben’s hand in hers. He is coming back; she knows that because she can feel he is using the small force healing abilities he has to fully come back.

Yet something is highly disturbing her. It’s a shift in the force, but one she can’t truly explain because she never experienced anything like this.

Her eyes fall again over Ben’s face. His pale skin looks less grey and she can tell life has returned to him despite those weeks of impairment. Can he feel the shift as well? Or is it something only her has access to?

He startles her when his eyes bolt open, and for the first time in a long while, she meets his dark orbs for real. His pupils adjust to the dimmed luminosity of the room but never leave her face.

Her free hand rises as if on autopilot and rests on his cheek. No words need to be spoken as she drags her thumb over his cheekbone. This is when she understands he feels it too… that strange disturbing sensation…

As he sits up, his eyes don’t leave her face and she can read strength and determination there. He is back, in all of his dark glory, his curly locks falling to frame his face.

« I had a vision. » He says, his voice still hoarse, and he is searching her eyes for some type of recognition.

« I feel something. But I don’t know what it is. » she admits, fully aware of what he is wondering about her.

« Rey… » his hold on her hand tightens to convince her for what he is certain she will resist to. « We need to go… We need to join my knights. »

A million of thoughts assault her at once. How much does he know about what is currently going on? Does he realize the danger of going there? Is he aware of the fact that they are currently raiding Starkiller 2?

Ben releases her hand and quickly cups her face, his eyes blazing. « We need to go… or else, the tides will shift in a way the galaxy can’t afford. »

« You just came back… you are in no condition to… » Ben silences her with a look that nearly terrifies her.

« There is no room for this. Do we have a ship? »

She considers for a while the idea of resisting, but as her eyes remain locked with his, this thoughts simply vanishes. If the force let him have this vision, it has a meaning.  « There is still Kira’s smuggler ship. »

***

**Resurgent-Class Anihilator**

**Ansion’s orbit – Mid Rim**

« Commander, the last remnants of the first Order’s Forces are currently under custody. Our surface’s troops claim they didn’t try to resist. » says the young ensign sent to the private commander’s quarters to relay the latest message from the battlefield.

Mitaka briefly looks at the holopad still displaying the message he received from Kira a few minutes ago. Against all odds, he makes an instant decision.

« Bring their leader on board. I have an offer to make. »

As the young ensign leaves to join the bridge, Mitaka returns to the small duraglass bay adorning his private quarters. Outside, he can see one damaged resurgent class and two smaller ships which have been equally neutralized.

Looking back at the holopad, a clear idea of what needs to be done forms in his mind. If he succeeds, this will change everything…

 

***

**Starkiller 2**

« Hey, Sandeco, are you with me? »

Kira’s eyes widen in confusion as she takes her communicator and activates it. Hiding behind a tree, she is scanning the area while the other knights are joining her back on the surface.

« Are you insane, Dameron ? » she hisses into the small device. « We are supposed to remain radio silent unless I am the one contacting your general! »

« Changes of plans, love. Listen. This is going to be rough. Hugs is on his way here with his battleship and he plans on using Starkiller 2 right about now. We won’t have a second chance. So we are going to coordinate and lead a combined attack, you and your team, black squadron on the air, and the Falcon’s crew on the ground with you for a sabotage mission. »

« What?!? » Kira looks at the four other knights before scanning the area once more.

« General Organa wants to know if you still feel like you can alter the kyber core. if not, can you help Finn, Rose and Chewie in the facility and plant the bombs with them ? »

 Meeting Jelan’s eyes, Kira ponders for a while.

« Lets split. » cuts Daine, his blonde hair falling in front of his eyes. « I will deal with the Kyber core with Jelan. We’ll do what we can. Take Nervan and Adara with you and help the resistance. »

« You won’t be able to alter the kyber enough. » states the young woman, her piercing green eyes narrowing in the process.

« Let us try. » calmly says Jelan. « We’ll keep you updated. And if we really need you to project yourself down there with us… you’ll be able to do it from where you are. »

Kira presses the button of her communicator, her eyes remaining on Jelan. « Ask the Falcon to land on sector 3 - 45, where we landed. Tell them to be prepared because once they are located in the atmosphere, there is no turning back. They are going to have the whole base against them. »

« Copy that. We’ll be here for aerial support.  Kira? » The way Poe pronounces her name is at the same time enticing and terrifying. 

« Yes? » she replies, her eyes moving up as if she could see him.

« Be careful, all right? There are a few things we need to talk about and I’d rather not do that with a force ghost. »

She should feel embarrassed to have witnesses for this type of conversation, but, with the odds against them, she doesn’t really care anymore.  « As long as you don’t get blown up into the void, we’ll have this conversation. »

He chuckles at her statements and she can picture his daredevil smile from where she is. « Hey, you’re talking to the best Resistance pilot. »

« Show off. » she says, a little too tenderly for it to be a criticism.

« Love you too » he says then cuts the communication.

* * *

 


End file.
